


Whiskey on Your Lips

by margotmuses



Category: Love Island (Video Game)
Genre: AU, Alcohol, Alternate Universe, Angst, Drinking, Drinking Games, Enemies to Friends, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Love Triangles, Love/Hate, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Build, Slow Burn, player au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:27:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 86,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25716547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/margotmuses/pseuds/margotmuses
Summary: Lexi works at a popular yet hidden London bar, frequented by one Bobby McKenzie, who’s got a bit of a reputation.
Relationships: Bobby McKenzie/Main Character (Love Island), Lucas Koh/Main Character (Love Island), OC/Bobby McKenzie, OC/Lucas Koh
Comments: 666
Kudos: 224





	1. Koh’s Cocktail Bar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucas asks Lexi a favour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Doin' Time - Lana Del Rey  
> S.O.S. - Dwayne Gretzky (ABBA cover)  
> Lavender - Two Door Cinema Club

The strength of the whisky burns in the air of the bar. An upmarket, London hide-spot for white collar’s after a long working day, Koh’s was like London’s worst kept secret. Tucked into a small corner in Mayfair, you only knew it was there if you knew the kind of people who frequented it. It was a Friday, so the vibe was relaxed and groups of men with loose ties congregate around women dressed to the nines. One particular man sits at the bar by himself, keeping a steady flow of laughter from the bartender who is rushed off her feet. He wears a white shirt buttoned only halfway up, letting the top of his freckled chest show, and the sleeves are rolled up at the elbows highlighting his lean bicep muscles. Under the bar he wears black skinny jeans, and taps a ringed finger against his knee. The bartender slips him another drink, washed purple at the ends of her platinum hair piled up in a bun at the top of her head. She, like the man, also wears a white shirt, hers fitted and tucked into a short black skirt, with a silver apron. The owner says it looks _classy_. Her colleague had been keeping an eye on the lone man as he continued to entertain her.

__

__

“You’re looking good tonight Lottie,” he winks, lifting the double measure of Laphroig to his lips.

“Yeah, yeah, keep it in your pants McKenzie,” Lottie chuckles, grinning playfully as she runs a tea towel round the inside of a wine glass.

“Where’s the fun in that?” He asks with a glint of mischief in his eye, quickly flashing a glance to Lottie’s colleague on the other side of the bar. The man glances back suspiciously, but tries to remain focused on the customer he is serving. Lottie shrugs to her customer before she is called away by a woman demanding some wine. 

The freckled man chuckles to himself and takes another sip of his drink, “It tastes like home...” he smiles to himself, letting the warm burning sensation of the liquid coat his mouth. He’d only moved to London from Glasgow last year, and reluctantly at that. Although he loved home, London had its little quirks he loved too, and Koh’s Cocktail Bar was one of those. He wasn’t sure why. The clientele weren’t always the most interesting people, but he was kept on his toes by the wealthy and prosperous, and the odd one night stand didn’t hurt.

Lottie’s colleague signals her over to him as he shovels ice into a cooler. She lifts her head in a nod, making her way towards him.

“Lottie, we need some more sugar syrup from the storeroom, we’ve got a lot of Cocktails flowing tonight.” He doesn’t look at her.

“No problem, boss,” she says mockingly.

He rolls his eyes. “I’ve told you not to call me that.” But a slight smirk plays at his lips as she saunters toward the storeroom, picking up a tray of used glasses on her way.

Lottie pushes open the door to the storeroom holding a tray full of dirty glasses, where a flustered woman stands over the dishwasher.

“Causing you hell again?” Lottie says as she places the tray to the side of the dishwasher.

The woman huffs in a disgruntled way, blowing a lock of hair from her eyes.  
“Don’t even start.” She holds a finger up as though trying to prevent Lottie’s next words.

“I... told... you...”

“No.”

“So!” The girls exclaim at the same time, earning a cackle from Lottie. “Lexi, I’ve been saying for weeks you need to tell Lucas to get a professional in.”

Instead of answering, Lexi just starts loading the dishwasher with the new glasses. Lottie shrugs, knowing her friend wouldn’t even talk to Lucas voluntarily if the world was ending. Lexi rolls her eyes and turns her attention to Lottie.

“What’s it like out there tonight?”

“Oh, you know. The usual. People get drunk, horny, and try to take someone home after a long week at work,” she pouts sarcastically, “One table orders only our cheapest Prosecco all night, another orders the most expensive liquors. Lucas ignores any and all advances from the girls at the bar because he’s too busy worrying about me.” A wicked grin plays on Lottie’s lips. “Mr McKenzie sits at the bar waiting for some unsuspecting girl to swoop in, be charmed by his accent and good looks, and buy him a drink.” She throws a hand out to her side. “But he looks damn good.”

“I couldn’t care in the slightest what that man is up to.” Lexi folds her arms over her stained apron.

“He’s a laugh, though. You’re just jealous you’ve never actually spoken to him.”

“He’s infuriating. And he gets away with it because of those dimples and those stupid jokes. You should stop humouring him, Lottie, quite frankly he doesn’t need the ego boost,” Lexi says, peering through the gap in the door as though she could see him. Her only opinions of Mr McKenzie came from rumours and Lottie’s correspondence. And of course Lucas’ doubt of him.

“Well I don’t mind the ego boost. He’s the only regular with good banter - you should listen to the way everyone else drones on about their work day. Plus it’s a fun game to play; ‘who will Bobby McKenzie take home tonight?’ I’ve been eyeing up an older blonde.”

“Well it’s a good thing you’re working the bar and not me.” Lexi shoots Lottie a disapproving look.

“Touché. Throw me that sugar syrup, Lucas is probably dying out there.”

She sighs, grabbing the opaque squeeze bottle from the shelf and tossing it towards her friend.

“Cheers hun. See you in a bit.” Lottie begins to turn on her heel.

“Oh Lottie?” Lexi focuses her gaze back at the dishwasher.

“Yeah?”

She blushes slightly. “Tell Lucas I said hi.”

Lottie smirks. “You know it babe.”

—-

“Lexi says hi,” Lottie flippantly says to her colleague, Lucas, who grabs the Malibu from in front of her.

“I need to talk to her about something actually.” He slams the glass into the metal shaker and begins to violently shake it about. Lottie raises an eyebrow. 

“What’s that?”

“Actually, if you have time could you-“ but he’s pulled away by a customer arriving to ask for a Mojito. A few minutes later he returns. “If you get a chance could you tell her I need her to stay late tonight. We have an event tomorrow and the bar needs to be spotless.” He doesn’t make eye contact with Lottie as he shovels some ice into a glass. She scowls at him but he doesn’t see.  
“Tell her yourself.” Lottie slams another double whiskey in front of the regular who makes her laugh. “You two are ridiculous,” she sighs to herself.

“Alright love I didn’t want any on the table!” Bobby chuckles as he lifts the glass to his lips. “Who’s ridiculous?” He asks. 

“None of your business,” she shoots back, causing Bobby to raise an eyebrow amusedly. She looks over to Lucas, and shoves her head totally non-slyly in the direction of the door to the side of the bar, where Lexi is loading the dishwasher. Lucas looks unimpressed as he sidles up to Lottie.

“Call last orders and start counting up the tills please, if you don’t want to take the easy job,” he says in a hushed voice as he makes his way to the door.

Bobby laughs. “He’s a bundle of fun isn’t he?”

“He’s actually alright.” She hesitates, thinking it best not to mention that Lucas wasn’t a fan of Bobby’s. Bobby shrugs playfully and slips off his seat.

“See you in a bit.” He turns and makes his way toward the older blonde Lottie had noticed him looking at earlier. _Too easy_ , she thinks to herself.

—-

“Lexi,” Lucas smiles warmly at the girl, who currently has large patches of water spilt over her used-to-be-white apron. She starts, nearly dropping a glass, and turns to her manager. 

“Are we closing up for the night?”

“...yes. But uh, there’s something I need you to do.” He walks towards her slowly, but keeps his distance all the same, and tries to hide the guilt on his face.

“Of course! What do you need?”

“We have an event here tomorrow, some businessmen from Beijing, and we need the place immaculate before noon. I’d like for you to stay to make sure this place is in good condition for our guests tomorrow.”

Lexi’s face falls before she catches herself and plasters on a small smile. 

“I had down this week that I would finish at 1am today...”

“You know I wouldn’t ask unless it was important.” His dark eyes bore into Lexi’s, and she can’t tell if he knows the effect he has on her. She melts under his gaze.

“Of course. I’ll make sure everything is spotless.” She smiles to hide her disappointment.

“Brilliant. You’re a star, Lexi. Don’t worry you’ll be paid for everything, and I would help if I could but my father wants to discuss the guests-“ He’s talking quickly.

“It’s okay, I really don’t mind. I’ll get started in a minute.” She smiles again. _It’s not okay. I do mind. Is this all I am to you?_

__

__

He nods at her, and leaves the room without another word. Meanwhile at the bar, Lottie has called last orders and a few drunkards slowly make their way out. She watches as Bobby’s new girl waves as she makes her way out, heart-eyeing him all the way. He chuckles and sidles up to Lottie. 

“She immune to the charms of Bobby McKenzie?” Lottie smirks, collecting glasses from the countertop.

“Ah!” Bobby exclaims and snags a cocktail stick from a forgotten martini. “And who do you think I am? She’s waiting for me outside, I need to pay my bill.” 

Lottie motions him toward the till and prods it a few times.

“Hold on a minute, it’s frozen. Let me grab Lucas.”

Bobby sighs mockingly and perches on a barstool. Lottie strolls over to Lucas on the other side of the bar. Just then, Lexi emerges from the door, sans hairnet and stained apron, wearing just the white shirt and black skirt like Lottie. Her cheeks are flush from the evenings labour and her hair escapes from a ponytail. Bobby looks bemused, still a light smile playing on his lips.

“How come I’ve never seen you before? I’m here a lot.” He sticks the cocktail stick in the corner of his mouth, grinning mischievously. She hadn’t noticed him there until he’d spoken, and turns toward him.

She scoffs. _I’ve seen you plenty_ she whispers under her breath, before straightening up and meeting his eyes. “I’m not front of house. I do the cleaning and the stock counting, boring behind the scenes stuff.” 

Lottie was right. Up close, she could see just how attractive he was, freckles dusting over his face and the bit of his chest which was visible, his hair neatly styled in short-ish dreadlocks on top of his head, and playful, inviting golden eyes.

“Hm.” He raises his eyebrows and reaches down to twirl the last of his drink. He hesitates, unsure how to proceed. Just as he’s thinking of a funny quip, Lottie returns and begins prodding at the screen once more. 

“Sorry about that, not sure what was going on,” Lottie smiles and holds out the card reader to Bobby, who pays and returns his card to his wallet. When he looks back to the storeroom door, Lexi has vanished.

——

Hours later Lexi’s roommate and best friend- Chelsea welcomes her in with a hug and a bowl of Oreos. She looks worried, knowing Lexi’s 2am return was not the usual. Lexi smiles warmly at her friend and pulls her into an embrace. Chelsea just pats her back for a while. 

“What happened?” She says after a long pause, holding the Oreos toward Lexi. Lexi takes two, stuffs them in her mouth and throws herself on the sofa.

“ThLucash.”

Chelsea doesn’t look surprised at the muffled-by-oreos answer, in fact she’d known it was coming. “Oh, babe.” She perches on the edge of the sofa, lifting Lexi’s legs into her lap.

“Ooh!” Chelsea squees, not seconds after sitting down, jumping back up again. “We’ve got three bottles of Prosecco in the fridge MADE for a night like this.”

Lexi laughs, flying a few crumbs over herself in the process. “Alright. Grab Priya and we’ll make a night of it.”

Priya, the girls’ next door neighbour, was the other shoe to Chelsea’s advice. A glamorous, gorgeous woman who was sweet yet fierce, and not afraid to say it like it is. They’d met the first day Chelsea and Lexi had moved in, after Chelsea’s failed attempt at brownies ended up on Priya’s doorstep. 

_“Oh my god Chels you didn’t...” Lexi glared at her friend open mouthed. Chelsea looked downtrodden, both girls knowing that Chelsea’s baking left a lot to be desired. “You know I could’ve made her something! Something that might actually make her like us,” Lexi scolded, laughing however at the thought of someone trying to eat Chelsea’s brownies. But before Chelsea could respond, a bemused Priya knocked at the door._

__

__

And the rest is history! Priya soon became a best friend to Flat 598, spending half her time there.

Chelsea skips out the door and Lexi hears as she knocks cheerily thrice on next door.

“What’s the situation?” Priya struts into the flat, wearing a revealing set of pyjamas, and her own litre bottle of vodka held in her left hand.


	2. The Lucas Problem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi, Priya, and Chelsea drink a little too much. Bobby returns to the bar, with a guest this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Shut Up And Dance - WALK THE MOON  
> Gold Dust (feat. Ms Dynamite) - DJ Fresh  
> My Head Is A Jungle (MK Remix/Radio Edit) - Wankelmut, Emma Louise, MK  
> I Like It - Cardi B

Priya pours out a healthy measure of vodka into one of Chelsea’s Prosecco glasses and tops it with a splash of Tonic water.

“Intense.” Lexi eyes up the drink, towelling her hair from the quick shower she’d just had. “Do me one, but switch the tonic for lemonade.” She trudges over to Priya in the kitchen, wearing silky button-up pyjamas.

Chelsea and Lexi’s flat was mainly open plan; the kitchen and living area all one main room, with three doors for the two bedrooms and the bathroom. Honestly? The place was pretty expensive what with being a two bedroom flat about a half hour commute from the centre of London, but Chelsea’s interior design company paid well, and helped with the cost of decoration which Lexi left all to Chelsea’s creative eye. She had an affinity for pink and grey, and cute quotable items. Lexi on the other hand, wasn’t paid quite so well working at the bar, but she’d taken up her parents’ offer to help out during the first couple of years after moving out - that, unfortunately, was nearly at its end. Priya on the other hand was a fairly high profile estate agent and could afford her own flat.

“Here you go babe.” Priya hands Lexi the drink and takes a sip of her own. Lexi scrunches her nose up at the taste, unable to hide her disgust like Priya could. But the situation called for it, and Lexi wasn’t working for the private event the next day so could sleep in. She feels relaxed, now in the company of her two favourite people in the world. She would do anything for them, and they for her. It was Chelsea who made waking up each morning more bearable, and coming home from work and whatever problem arose there. Priya was the one whom Lexi shared characteristics with, they could relate to each other, and were both fiercely protective over one another, but even more so, Chelsea.

The three women sit lazily on the sofa, gulping their drinks and recounting their days. Chelsea gushed about the woman who needed her summerhouse decorating, Priya complained about the man who wanted the ‘perfect’ house, and Lexi moped about having to stay late by herself. This wasn’t the first time either. Ever since The Event (as she liked to call it), Lexi had to work harder than she’d bargained for. The only word that could describe how she felt was used, but it didn’t quite hit the mark. It was her job, and she remained professional, but that little bit of her stung every time things didn’t go to plan. Sometimes she felt a bit out of place. Her best friends were both thriving in their careers and she was pretty much a glorified dishwasher. It hadn’t really been her dream, she’d only gone to the interview as a side job to help fund her Masters, but nearly two years later and it’s now her full time job. Fat lot of good that degree was. Everyone was constantly telling her she’d find her dream, this was just a layover, but the layover kinda sucked. Especially when Lucas was involved. The burn of the alcohol on her throat created a nice distraction, and her vision begins to blur whilst her mind numbs to nothing. 

Later, Chelsea bounces up and down on the sofa, Priya is coffee-table dancing, and Lexi stands between the two on the floor, yelling out the lyrics to WALK THE MOON’s ‘Shut Up and Dance’. They are at this point, well and truly plastered. Priya and Chelsea hold hands across the gap, and Lexi tries to limbo under them, instead falling over and bursting into fits of laughter. That was gonna bruise in the morning. Priya helps her up onto the table, and they dance to their hearts content, moving to the music and letting go of all their cares in the world. There are three empty bottles of Prosecco on the kitchen counter, next to Priya’s vodka, which has only a quarter left.

Feeling exhausted, Lexi slumps back on the sofa. Her mind is still buzzing with not much thought, only seeing the little blurred window from her eyes. This was good.

“Excuse me!” Chelsea chastises. “Not yet!” she pulls up her drowsy roommate by the hand and signals Priya toward Chelsea’s bedroom. Priya takes her vodka from the counter and follows her friends. The room is pink and grey like the rest of the house, the bed covered in a multitude of plush cushions, in all sorts of patterns and styles, some reading cute quotes.

“So, I think it’s time for the talk,” Chelsea says with a sad look on her face. Lexi groans. 

“I’m too drunk for this.” Lexi throws herself backward onto Chelsea’s heavily adorned bed. She knew she needed the talk, but she really didn’t want it. 

“I don’t understand it! When we go to the club or the pub you’re so talkative and flirty, but when Lucas is involved its like you turn into some meek little mouse.” Priya points a stern face at her friend. “I don’t know how many more men you have to get with to get over the boy.” Priya was sympathetic to her friend’s feelings, but it was difficult to watch her be such a state over one man, so her advice these days was a little more blunt and reprimanding. Pre-Lucas Lexi was carefree and mirrored Priya’s attitude in having fun with people she was attracted to on a night out. It was true, she’d slept with quite a lot of people during her undergraduate years, but these days they were few and far between. Chelsea had fun too, but deep down she was yearning for monogamy, she just hadn’t found the right person yet. University had been an excellent time for the two to experiment and let loose, and now they were left with the conclusions they’d come to.

“He’s a career focused man and has shown no interest in relationships! I love you Lexi but you gotta play the field a bit more. I just don’t think he’s special enough for you to pine over him like Kate Winslet and her ex in _The Holiday_.” She crunches her nose up and swigs directly from the bottle of vodka.

“Priya!” Chelsea screeches. “I gave you a glass for that!”

Priya rolls her eyes at Lexi as she fills the glass halfway up from the vodka bottle. Lexi is quiet; they didn’t know what she knew. It was something she’d kept from her friends for almost a year now, and she wasn’t quite sure why if she was honest with herself. But some things ought to be kept pure, the moment unaltered by others’ opinions and the reality of speaking it into existence. This was one of them.

“Babes I think you should tell him you like him. You’ve got to go after what you want!” Chelsea points to a mural on the wall which reads: _if you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it._ Priya smiles affectionately at her friend. The sheer number of quotes littered around the house could be considered cheesy or annoying, but Lexi and Priya loved them. It was a perfect example of the heart of their friend.

Lexi was growing tired of things revolving around Lucas. “Screw him, I’d rather at least some of our chats passed the Bechdel test. I’m tired of talking about men.” She waves a hand dismissively toward her friends.

“Here, here!” Priya raises her glass, now filled with straight vodka, and swigs a hearty gulp. Chelsea eyes her with disdain.

“Bechamel? Will you make me lasagne soon pleeeease Lexi?” Chelsea slurs, pulling her friends arm. Priya and Lexi snort in that warm, affectionate drunk laugh when everyone’s growing tired and beginning to sober up.

“Of course, babe.”

Chelsea smiles happily and stretches her arms out to the side, when she hiccups and accidentally tips her glass, spilling her drink all down the sleeve of her pretty pink blush dress.

“Oh no! _hic._. Never mind, _hic_ , I’ll just, _hic_ , get into my pyjamas! Pyjama party!” Chelsea says. She raises her hands above her head and starts to circle them in some sort of dance move. She looks adorable, but definitely very drunk. Lexi and Priya cackle as their friend leaves the room humming to herself. 

“Throw me that silky dressing gown,” Priya reaches a hand up from the bed, motioning to Chelsea’s bed side table. The three girls shared clothes and other things all the time.

“You can’t bear to walk next door?” Lexi huffs. Priya simply shakes her head slowly, eyes shut and hand to her forehead. She chucks the garment at Priya, who swigs the last of her drink. “Wait. Where did Chels go?”

“What?” Priya snaps her eyes open and searches the room. “CHELSEA!” She yells. “WE’RE ALREADY IN YOUR BEDROOM!”

A smiling Chelsea appears in the doorway, wearing Lexi’s old Winnie the Pooh pyjamas. “Oops!” she giggles, “Guess I’ve had more to drink than I thought…”

The three girls settle into Chelsea’s bed, ignoring the fact that their own beds are just next door, and reminisce on good times they’ve had over the last couple of years.

“Urghhhh,” Priya groans from the middle of the bed, clutching her head. “What time is it?”

Chelsea rolls over to check her phone. “11:36.” She frowns. “That’s the morning out the window.”

“Good thing none of us are working this morning,” Lexi sighs, nausea hitting her when she moves. She never remembered how bad the hangover was until it was already too late. “I’ll get started on a fry up.”

“Extra hash browns please,” Chelsea sighs. Lexi trudges into the kitchen to start on their Full English.

“Right. I don’t know about you Chels but I’m not at all tired,” Priya jumps energetically off the bed, clutching Chelsea’s dressing gown over her pyjamas.

“What?” Chelsea’s mouth falls open. “Not this again.”

“Just tell yourself you’re not tired!” she shouts back as she too exits the room.

Chelsea makes a disgruntled noise to herself, before slowly getting up from the bed.

Chelsea nurses her head on the sofa as Lexi stumbles round the kitchen in a hungover way, and Priya moves around the apartment cleaning up the mess. Lexi’s phone dings loudly from the counter, and she reaches over to read the text.

**Lucas:** Place looks great. Thanks. See you tomorrow. 

She huffs, and slams her phone back on the counter face down. _Dick_.

—- 

The week passes by slowly in the same routine. Waking up, cooking, tidying the house, showering, heading to work, cleaning, filling the dishwasher, replenishing stock, laughing with Lottie, avoiding Lucas, heading home. Friday comes around eventually, and Lexi enters the bar at 3:30pm ready for her 4:00pm shift.

“PLEASE tell me our tables aren’t fully booked tonight?” Lexi chucks down her bag in the staff room, dramatically fisting her hands in front of her to Lottie, who is sat on a bench fiddling with her nail polish. Full house nights were the worst, and probably the reason the dishwasher had started malfunctioning. She was constantly putting loads on, throwing extra stock at Lottie, and leaving the glasses out to dry.

“Okay, I won’t tell you.” She leans back into the wall and crosses her arms over her chest. Lexi releases her fists with a sigh.

“Well, shit. Tonight will be fun then.” She perches next to Lottie, placing a paper takeaway cup in her hand. “I stopped at Wilderness Coffee on the way here, it’s their liquorice and nettle blend.”

“Cheers hun, I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Lottie takes a small sip then dramatically throws her head onto Lexi’s shoulder. “I’m not sure I can cope with one more greasy bloke trying to get my number and not being allowed to retaliate.”

Lexi raises her eyebrows. “I’d be shocked if you didn’t find a way to flip them off on the sly anyway.”

Lottie shrugs her free shoulder. “They need more than the finger.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” she sighs. “But we’d better get to it if we’ve got a full house tonight. I’m tired already.”

A few hours later and the bar is packed, humming with excitement and the buzz of the expensive alcohol. Lexi is counting stock in the storeroom, humming to herself, and thinking about her plans for when she’d get home. They currently involved Netflix, chocolate, and pyjamas. And probably a lot of sleep.

At the counter, Lottie mixes drinks when Bobby swaggers into the bar, wearing a black floral shirt and black jeans this week. Except today he has a friend coming in behind him. He smirks cheekily when he sees Lottie, and plumps himself on a barstool, his friend following and sitting on the stool beside him.

“Alright, trouble?” he nods at Lottie, who is taking in the man next to him.

“McKenzie. Pleasure as always.” She leans on the bar.

“This is Gary,” he motions to the man.

“Oh?” Lottie raises an eyebrow and lifts up one side of her lips in a smirk. He was very attractive. “And where have you been Gary?”

“I – what? I’ve just got off work-“

Bobby chuckles, shaking his head. Gary cottons on and clears his throat. Gary is wearing blue jeans and a white t-shirt. His hands are calloused in way which suggests he does manual labour, and his blonde hair is roughly gelled up. He wears a watch and a chain round his neck. It’s obvious by the way he keeps looking around and pulling at his chain that he feels out of place. He smiles at Lottie.

“Bobby’s told me lots about you,” he starts.

“Oh, has he now?” she curls her purple-painted lips up.

“Don’t tell her my secrets now, mate,” Bobby breaks into a wide grin.

“Fat chance of that – you don’t have any!” Gary laughs at his friend.

“That you know of…” Bobby says in a mockingly mysterious way. Of course, there was a lot Gary didn't know, but Bobby had pencilled that in as a conversation for never.

“What can I get you boys?” Lottie asks.

“Ooh, let’s go for a Sex on the Beach today,” Bobby winks, earning a playful eye roll from Lottie. If he was honest, Bobby didn't have a favourite drink, but they did tend to reflect his mood. A scottish whiskey for when he missed home, a cocktail when he was feeling cheeky, a pint for a chill one with the lads, and wine for a date. Not that he'd been on one of those for a while, or in fact had wanted to. Gary sometimes tried to rope him in to a double date, but they all ended the same way: with them going home together and never speaking again. Just how he liked it. And then Gary would say something like: _Aw mate, she seemed like a right catch. I really thought it would go well this time._ before sheepishly admitting he too had taken his date home with no follow up text.

Gary looks uncomfortable. “Don’t ‘spose you got a pint somewhere?” he chuckles awkwardly.

“You’re in the wrong place, hun. We have bottles of Heineken? Or Corona?” Lottie offers.

“Alright, a Heineken then,” Gary concedes, setting Lottie off to make their drinks. “I thought we were going to the pub, mate,” Gary hushes to Bobby.

“I said we were going for drinks; I never said the pub,” Bobby holds his arms up playfully. “It’s nice here. Once you get past the stuck-up posho’s and price of the drinks. Hence why we pre-drank.”

“I’m not sure it’s my vibe… didn’t really expect it to be yours either.” Gary scans his eyes round the room, before settling on Lottie, who is laughing at a customer nearby.

Bobby flits his eyes swiftly to the storeroom door. “I think it’ll grow on you.”


	3. Drinks and Deals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby and Gary relax, and Bobby cooks up a plan to help Lexi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Shake It - Metro Station  
> In My Mind - Dynoro, Gigi D'Agostino  
> Sister of Pearl - Baio

About an hour later, the boys are a few drinks in and laughing loudly at whatever they’re saying to each other. Bobby and Gary had actually met on a night not so dissimilar to this one. They were at Gary’s local, which of course, Bobby didn’t know at the time, he had been taking a look around the area since he had only just moved, and decided to get a drink. No better way to make friends than slightly pissed, right? And Bobby was confident enough to strike up a conversation. Gary had been ordering a pint of the draught on tap when Bobby sidled up beside him. He’d asked if the draught was any good, and Gary had gone into a lengthy conversation about the different beers at the pub. He’d asked if Bobby was from Scotland and what kind of beers he had there, and Bobby had talked about Glasgow and his visit to Islay and the distilleries. When the pub closed, they decided to stay in contact, go out for drinks more, and non-drink related activities. Gary had shown Bobby around his favourite parts of London, they’d done all the tourist-y things like touring the Tower of London, going on the London Eye, watched a West End Musical, eaten their way through Chinatown, Gary had taken Bobby to see his Nan in Chatham, they played a lot of video games together, and they’d even driven to see an animal sanctuary together. They were mates at first pint and Bobby was so grateful he’d found someone like Gary to spend time with and rely on. He’d texted Gary earlier this evening asking if he wanted to go for drinks, and told him to meet at Bond Street tube station, Gary hadn’t asked any further questions, but now he was wishing he had. 

“So mate, you come here a lot then? You seem friendly with that bartender,” Gary tries to ask casually.

“Yeah, a fair bit,” Bobby shrugs. “Her name’s Lottie by the way,” he adds with a smirk. Gary tries to hide his own smile.

“Good to know…” He says before he coughs into his hand. Bobby slaps him on the back affectionately.

“Gary and Lottie  
Sitting in a tree  
K-I-S-S-I-N-“ Bobby teases, bobbing side to side comically.

“Shut up.” Gary shoves him back. They banter back and forth for a while, until the bar starts to fill up even more.

Lottie is rushing down the length of the bar and Lucas shakes cocktails furiously. She shouts over to him.

“Lucas we are seriously swamped out here, when the hell is Sarah turning up? The rota says she should’ve been here an hour ago!” she blows hair from her face as she muddles some mint rather speedily.

“I don’t know, I’ve texted her every chance I’ve got with no reply.” Lucas is stressed. To those who didn’t know him he looked pretty normal, but he got this look in his eye with a slightly crinkled brow which was a tell.

“Lucas. We need to bring in Lexi, she’s trained for this and at least can calm the storm until we can contact another employee.” Lottie sweats as she tries to open a new bottle of Rum.

Lucas grits his teeth but he knows it’s their only option for the time being. At the end of the day, this mess was his own fault. Sarah was SO getting fired if she didn’t have a good excuse.

“You’re right. I’ll hold down the fort while you go and get her ready.”

\---

“Lexi, we need you out there,” Lottie breathes heavily as she crashes into the storeroom. Lexi has soapy rubber gloves on her hands and looks taken aback by her friend’s dishevelled appearance. Lottie wasn’t exactly high maintenance, but she always looked good and made an effort to do so.

“What? Need me to clean a spillage or-“

“No. We need you working the bar, there’s way too many people out there for just Lucas and I, and Sarah hasn’t shown up. I’m – sorry,” she fiddles with her neck apologetically. “You know what you’re doing and all.”

“I’m on it,” Lexi nods. She will do her best work no matter the situation. Lottie gives her a smile in thanks. She throws Lexi a silver apron and Lexi re-does her ponytail into a bun. They both wash their hands in the storeroom sink and head out to the bar. Lexi has to stop herself from gasping at the sheer amount of people there tonight. Her eyes rest on Bobby subconsciously. She admires the way his floral black shirt is tight on his arms, even the way he holds his cocktail, loose with his ringed fingers, is attractive. But he was bad news, she knew that. Bobby cocks an eyebrow from his stool, noticing the way she studies him. He too is admiring the contours of her face, her soft skin, wide eyes and heavy brow. She looks tired, but pretty. Lottie has already left to serve customers.

“I thought you didn’t work the bar,” he muses.

“Well, I do today. Can I get you anything?” Lexi asks politely, looking over at Gary whose face is unreadable. 

“Your number?” he laughs.

“In your dreams,” she says, trying to ignore the heat creeping up into her cheeks.

“I’m joking.” But a glint in his eyes suggests there might have been an element of truth. Bobby lifts up the half full cocktail he’s holding.  
“I’m alright, cheers.”

He looks at Gary who nods a: ‘No thanks’, and so Lexi moves on to start serving other people.

\--- 

“Lexi, can you grab some more ice?” Lottie shouts over at Lexi. She nods and quickly runs to the storeroom. Bobby muses over her name. It fits her, he wondered what it was short for, and wanted to try it out to see how it tasted in his mouth.

\---

The bar is calming down, lots of its patrons heading off home or on to a club to extend their night. Gary is getting tired, he’d spent all day on the cranes and he had a fairly full day tomorrow too. He loved his job, he really did, but he was sensible when it came to making sure he had the energy to do it properly. 

“Alright, Bob, I think I’ve gotta be off now I’m afraid,” he pats a hand on Bobby’s shoulder.

“Yeah, course. Need me to walk with you to the station? Or are you getting a cab?” 

“I’ll jump on the tube, need to clear my head a bit after all this beer so you’re alright mate.” 

“Alright mate, stay safe, I’ll see you soon?” 

“Definitely,” he leans in closer, “I wouldn’t mind coming here again,” he eyes Lottie, “but we do need to go pub soon.” 

Bobby laughs. “Take care.” They wave at each other as Gary steps out into the cool night air. October’s in London were cold, but Gary was used to it, and besides, he had a beer jacket to aid on his walk. 

Bobby decides to finish this cocktail and head home himself, he too had had a rather taxing week at the hospital and was looking forward to a quiet night in. Not to mention the shifts he’d started picking up at his local bakery to flex his muscles a little. His dream was to own his own bakery, he’d been saving up for a while. But of course London was expensive, and he couldn’t see himself moving back to Glasgow permanently any time soon. London was just right for him at this point in his life, and one day, sure, he’d settle down in Glasgow, marry a nice girl, take his kids to have a picnic outside the cathedral, make them a cake for the occasion. But owning a London bakery just felt more special. More of an achievement at this time in his life, he’s still young and has plenty of room for relocations and mistakes. Sometimes he missed catering for the hospital when he was at the bakery, putting a smile on the patients’ faces with his ridiculous jokes, but at least at the bakery he had a little more freedom. He baked at home too, but between his two jobs and social obligations he didn’t have much time for that. The cocktail swills around in the glass as he stares down into it, orange and red hues melding together. He looks up and notices the clock, realising he’s been ruminating on his own thoughts for longer than he’d expected. The new bartender, who he’d heard Lottie refer to as Lexi, skirts nervously around her male colleague in an attempt to grab the Absolut Vanilla. She then rushes over to Bobby’s side of the bar to grab a glass, briefly meeting his eyes. 

“Lexi, was it?” He leans forward on the bar. She looks taken aback that he knows her name but quickly composes herself.

“Yes, sorry. I’ll be with you in a minute, I’ve just gotta get this to that customer.” The way she’s looking at him surprises him. He’d figured maybe she was nervous around men, hence the awkwardness with her colleague, but she stares Bobby down coolly and confidently. He can almost feel the chill. Well that solves that mystery, he thought. She finishes making the drink and walks over to place it in front of the young woman who’d ordered it. Then she returns to Bobby, placing her hands on the bar in front of him.

“What can I get you? It’ll be last orders soon.” She takes a cloth from below the bar and wipes the circular imprint from Bobby’s drink. He feels her hand close to his, watches as it’s but a hairline away one minute, and gone the next. He clears his throat. 

“I think I can help out with your little problem.” He pulls the pineapple from the side of his drink and sucks it, pulling a face at the tang. She raises an eyebrow, visibly unimpressed. 

“And what’s this problem I have?”

Bobby makes a show of cupping his hands round his mouth and whispering loudly: “Your crush?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Lexi looks him in the eye with a withering stare.

“So you and that guy over there haven’t been deliberately trying not to look at each other for the past half hour?” He smiles knowingly. She sighs, looking down to the rag clutched in her hand, feeding it through her fingers.

“You know absolutely nothing about me.” Then remembering her customer service manners, “No offence.”

“I’m not offended. I don’t need to know anything about you to give you a little helping hand,” he grins. Then, after a beat realising Lexi is waiting for him to go on, he continues. “What say you and I have a little fun? Make him jealous?” He cocks his head to the side, smirking still. Lexi looks over to her colleagues, nervous she was taking too long away from the customers.

“I absolutely refuse to go home with you,” she says lowly, eyes focused on Bobby and her face dubious.

He chuckles. “It wasn’t really what I was referring to but, that would work too.” He looks her up and down with a smirk. She can practically feel the way he’s undressing her with his look.

“Well then what were you trying to say?”

“Just a bit of harmless flirting, maybe I buy you a drink, hand on the thigh that kind of thing. He seems like the protective sort.”

“And what’s in this for you?.”

He scoffs mockingly, dramatically placing a hand to his heart and his face aghast. “Well, only being a Good Samaritan. From one human to another.”

“I’m not sure Lucas would even notice right now. He’s a busy man.” She turns her head to study him before quickly turning back to Bobby.

“Lucas, huh?” His eyes light up. “Lexi, Lottie, and Lucas. I like the alliteration.”

She weighs up her options. On the one hand, Bobby McKenzie was sleazy and would do anything to get in her pants. On the other hand, that could prove to her advantage. She knew Lucas didn’t like him much, coming into his bar frequently and sweet-talking his employees and customers all the same. And she knew despite their situation Lucas was protective of her, she knew about the way he fiercely watched Bobby with Lottie. Bobby was very attractive too, so it wouldn’t exactly be torture to flirt with him a little. She’ll regret this, she’s thinking, but what the hell.

“So, what’s the plan?”


	4. This Is My Stop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby and Lexi get started on their plan, there’s an unexpected issue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Loud Places - Jamie xx, Romy  
> You Are The Best Thing - Sophie Faith  
> All The Stars - SZA

He laughs cockily. “You’re game then? Well alright. First I’ll do this…” He bites his bottom lip and looks up at Lexi through his eyelashes. Lexi bursts into fits of laughter. As attractive as Bobby was, it was just an embarrassing move.

“Are you trying to look ridiculous?”

“I’m trying to make you laugh,” he flashes his teeth in a smile. “It worked.”

She attempts to hide her smile. “And what on earth does that achieve?”

“Don’t look but, lover boy is looking this way. I get the feeling he’s not my biggest fan, and if he sees me flirting with his girl…” he holds his hands up nonchalantly.

“I’m not ‘his’ girl. But I see your point.” She scans quickly over to Lucas, and flushes when they make direct eye contact for a short moment. “To be honest, he’s probably looking this way because I should be working.”

He nods. “Alright. How about I leave you alone and I walk you home when you’re off the clock?”

“You think I’ll trust a man I barely know to walk me home?”

“I’m here a lot. Everyone knows me. And everyone will see us leave together,” he laughs under his breath. “If I was looking to secretly murder you I don’t think this is the way I’d go about it.”

She considers him. “Fair enough. We close in about half an hour. But I’m sure you know that.”

—- 

Later, last orders have been called and they’ve started cleaning up. As soon as the clock strikes 1am, Lexi makes a point of getting ready to leave.

“We can go.” Lottie trudges up to her, raking a hand down her face in exhaustion.

“Nice.” Lexi looks over to Bobby as a way of letting him know she’s going to fetch her belongings and meet him back here. He has already got his bomber jacket slung over his arm and shoots her a smile.

“So,” Lottie says pointedly as they step into the staff room. “What happened to you not caring in the slightest what was up with Mr McKenzie?” she folds her arms over her apron and sits back on her hip.

 _Oh god_. Lexi hadn’t considered that Lucas wasn’t the only one who would see her talking to Bobby. _Shit._

“I’ll admit he’s got good banter if you promise not to say I told you so.” Letting Lottie know what they were up to meant telling her about Lucas, and she wasn’t ready for that yet. Lottie was one of her closest friends, but It didn’t matter because no one knew except Lexi and Lucas. Telling Chelsea and Priya that she liked him was kind of necessary when they worked out something was up, but they didn’t know the rest of it, and Lottie couldn’t know any of it yet because they worked with him, which makes things awkward.

Lottie bites away a smile. “It is killing me to not say it.”

Lexi just gives her a look, and starts to get out of her apron.

“You know what though? Lucas could not stop looking at you two giggling away. Like, more so than when he’s protective over me,” she smiles bemusedly and follows Lexi’s suit in taking off her apron. Lexi tries not to smile about this. _It had worked. Some silly little flirting plan had actually caught Lucas’ attention. One point to Lexi._

Once the girls are in their October weather coats and bags on shoulders, they push open the staff room doors, go through the storeroom, and enter back into the bar at the same time. Lucas is counting up the tills by himself. Lexi might feel guilty if he hadn’t made her do extra time last week. Bobby stands by the doors to the street, leaning on the glass with his hands in his pockets. He looks up from his phone and smiles at Lexi from across the bar. Lexi brings up her hand in a small wave, catching Lottie’s attention. She follows Lexi’s wave all the way to Bobby, and looks at Lexi with a shocked smile, mouth wide but turned up at the corners. She motions her eyes rather aggressively toward Bobby, as if to say: _what the hell? We are SO talking about this later._ Lexi clears her throat, ignoring her friend and walking up to Bobby. Lucas’ eyes track her all the way to the door.

“You ready?” Bobby asks.

“Yeah,” Lexi replies, looking back toward Lucas and Lottie. “See you guys tomorrow.”

Lottie winks a _see ya,_ but Lucas just nods, his jaw tight and face intense. _This is better than I expected_ , Lexi thinks. Bobby opens the door for Lexi, motioning for her to go first. The cold winter breeze hits her as soon as she walks outside, shocking her face and blowing her hair behind her. She wishes she’d bought a hat. Bobby pops up behind her and throws on his bomber.

“You have to truly feel the effect of the coat,” he grins.

“You sound like my mother,” Lexi laughs. She reaches out to feel the bomber between her fingers. “I’m cold in a full on coat and you think it’s sensible to wear something this thin?”

He shrugs. “Now who sounds like who’s mother? I’ve survived worse.” They start to meander down the street, the quiet cold settling comfortably on their ears. After a while, Bobby starts.

“Wait. You said you were cold? Do you want this?” He asks, already starting to take it off. He really wasn’t what she expected. Lexi couldn’t tell if this was just a ploy, or if he really cared that she was cold.

“Wow. THE Bobby McKenzie offering me his jacket? How romantic,” she quips.

“You know my name?” he turns his full face to her, intrigue creeping over it.

“Well, yeah. Your reputation kinda precedes you,” she shrugs, stuffing her hands in her pockets.

“Here I was thinking I could make a fresh new impression on you,” he laughs, but it feels kind of sad. They walk down more streets, somewhat silently, but comfortably.

“Sorry, I didn’t actually ask where we were going. I just sort of assumed Bond Street tube station since that’s where I was heading.”

“It’s okay. That’s where I’m going too.”

It was odd. These two practical strangers walking side by side in a comfortable stillness, feeling safe with one another. The quiet side streets become bustling London roads, the 1am buzz one of people outside pubs and bars laughing, and those walking home like they were. Both strode side by side, trying to work each other out, but being quite content that figuring it out might be a challenge, one they were willing to see through. Lexi was still comfortable classing Bobby as someone she dislikes, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t appreciate what he had done for her. He was even walking her home for gods sake, actually doing it rather than just pretending then leaving, with no expectation. Her experiences with guys in the past were different, mostly one night stands who had no obligation to care for her, but it still hurt a little when there wasn’t the general human decency kind of care. And Lucas, of course, was… complicated. He was a good guy, but… well, things weren’t quite right between them. Then there was Bobby. A man she’d spoken to properly for the first time barely three hours prior, walking her home just because it was the nice thing to do. She still wasn’t convinced about his reputation, it was hard not to believe that he was a complete womaniser, what with, well, the many women he left the bar with. Not to mention the constant flirting. But she’d only know him a few hours, perhaps this was always how he charmed women to begin with. Nonetheless, it felt nice.

“Thanks for tonight, by the way,” Lexi breaks the silence as they enter the underground.

“No problem, it’s fun.”

They scan their Oyster cards and start down the stairs. The station is mildly busy, not too overrun as it is in the daytime but enough to show it’s a Friday night.

“This doesn’t mean I like you though.” She leans against the wall at the platform, and he steps to the side of her.

He holds his hands up defensively. “Fine by me. Most people do, though. I think I’m quite a lovable guy.” He’s doing that damned grin again, the one that highlights his dimples and those lips. They stand in silence again until the train pulls up, and sit beside each-other in free seats.

“So this is your every day commute?” Bobby asks, leaning back into his seat casually.

“Yep. Half an hour away from work is pretty good for London,” she shrugs. He nods.

Bobby liked this. This woman who was accepting things from him without guilt, who challenged him. Maybe he would play the long game with her. Either way, he could tell it would be fun. Who said their little flirtation had to end after tonight, he certainly wouldn’t mind if she needed his help again. There was no denying that she was insanely attractive, and the fact she didn’t like him just made him all the more determined to win her over. Because people always liked him, even if they thought he was a bit of a ‘man whore’, as Gary might say, it was always in this kind of cheeky chappie way, he could win people over easy with his jokes. Not having that with Lexi… it excited him as much as it frustrated him. And he vowed that first night that he would change her mind, even if it only lasted one night. 

Lexi’s phone dings with a text.

 **Chelsea** : watching movies at priyas so won’t be home when u get in. Come join if u want xx

She smiles at the thought of her friends, but decides she’s probably too tired to join them. She leaves the text.

“This is my stop,” she starts to stand as the announcement calls a station, slinging her bag over her shoulder.

“I’m not letting you walk back alone, that would make me a terrible chaperone.” 

She rolls her eyes, but is secretly glad. “Fine. It’s not far though.” The tube begins to slow and the doors slide open to the platform, where Lexi and Bobby gladly step off onto the solid ground. They follow the motions through again; climbing the stairs, swiping their Oyster cards, and stepping out into the cool night air.

“So, Lex,” Bobby starts, smirking at his new nickname for her. She kind of likes it, but won’t admit that. “What’s it short for?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know. I can’t have all my cards on the table after only three hours, Mr McKenzie.” She drags out his name dramatically, letting it glide through the air in her smooth timbre. She’s looking at him with her chin raised confidently as they stride through a park.

He chuckles. “My dad is Mr McKenzie, I’m just Bobby. But okay, I see your point. You’ve got a reputation to uphold, right? Cool, unbothered not-bartender who totally doesn’t have a crush on her boss.” He was going to add a quip about vulnerability and emotion, until realising that applied to him, too, and exposing himself wasn’t the plan.

“Technically he isn’t my boss, his dad is. But he’s basically in charge these days.”

“When you get home, do you read all the workplace romance books you can get your hands on? Is that why you like him? I get it, he’s a sexy man,” Bobby giggles like a child as he imagines Lexi having created a fantasy of her boss.

She scoffs. “You have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about, and I’m not going to bother to humour you with an answer.” 

“What, is it like a Christian Grey thing? Businessman chic or whatever.” Bobby is beside himself with laughter.

She ignores him. They’d reached her block of flats anyway. He walks her all the way up to her flat door, not listening to her excuses.

“This is me,” she finally says as they stand outside flat 598. They are opposite one another, neither one breaking eye contact.

“Well, Lex, it’s been fun. Until next time, huh?”

“I don’t know, depends on how good your services are.”

Bobby grins cheekily and winks, his services were fantastic, _thank you very much_. But he didn’t want to push it by making that joke out loud. Bobby pulls out his phone to make a call, but frowns at the black screen in front of him.

“Shit,” he says under his breath.

“Everything okay?” Lexi asks hesitantly.

“I was meant to call my friend for a lift, but my phones dead,” he sighs. 

“Do you know their number? You can use mine?” Lexi asks. He grimaces.

“No. God, she’s probably wondering where I am.” How could this happen? It was on power saving mode all evening and he’d made a point not to use it. Sod’s law at it again. He realised how bad this looked. How it deliberately looked like he was trying to find an excuse to get into her apartment, but he really was telling the truth.

Lexi grits her teeth and shuts her eyes. “For fucks sake,” she mutters. “Fine. Come in and borrow my charger until you can contact them.”

He lights up. “Are you sure? I really don’t want to inconvenience you.”

“Just get on with it,” Lexi says as she unlocks the door to her flat. He follows her in and she locks the door behind them.

—-

“Move!” Chelsea whisper-yells as she pushes Priya with her shoulder. “You’ve already been looking for the past five minutes - it’s my turn!”

Priya scrunches her nose up. “Because you’re terrible at telling me what’s happening!”

“No! Okay she’s, she’s opening the door! OH MY GOD!” Chelsea shouts, clasping her hands over her mouth when realising she’s too loud. But it’s okay, Lexi and Bobby don’t hear. 

“He’s gone in the flat with her!” She points dramatically at the fish-eye hole in the door. Priya’s eyes widen, pushing Chelsea out of the way to look herself. She manages to catch Lexi closing the door behind her, with Bobby in the background.

“Well, shit, that’s not happened in a while!” 

“He’s cute. Did you see?!?” Chelsea bounces from one foot to another.

“I’m so proud,” Priya mock cries. “He must be from the bar.”

“She must’ve seen an in when I told her I was over here. Oh she’s so cheeky!” Squeaks Chelsea.

“Hey I don’t blame her. You’re right, he was cute. Get it girl.”

“I told you my ears are like antennae, I ALWAYS know when someone’s in the corridor,” Chelsea beams.

“And I know when someone’s getting laid,” Priya crosses her arms with a smirk. “It’s a sixth sense.”


	5. Miscommunications

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened after work seems to have been confused. Some are happy about it, some aren’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Perfect Places - Lorde  
> I Like Me Better - Lauv (Recorded at Spotify Studios)  
> D is for Dangerous - Arctic Monkeys

“Nice place you got here,” Bobby muses as he stands in the open living area. He eyes up the lashings of pink and grey. A grey sofa sits right before him, with a pink throw draped over the top and four pink cushions, two tucked into each corner. One on each side is plain, and one on the left reads ‘C’, and the one on the right ‘L’. The coffee table is pine but has a pink doily style mat on it and two grey coasters on each side, a succulent plant sits in the middle. There’s also a fluffy grey rug laid under the table. The kitchen is white with a grey counter, small and tidy. The flat shows signs of attractive decoration hiding its inherent ugliness.

“Thanks. My roommate is an interior decorator so this is all her.” Lexi scans her eyes round at her home.

“Oh sick. She here?” Bobby was actually very interested in meeting people Lexi interacted with, he needed to figure her out.

“No, she’s at our friends place. Here,” Lexi motions for Bobby to follow her into her bedroom. He snickers to himself. He’s surprised at the room. It’s got a theme of grey and yellow, but the cutesy pillows and framed quotes didn’t seem Lexi’s style. He raises an eyebrow.

“What?” She asks.

“I don’t know. I just wasn’t expecting this.” He points to one of the frames which reads; ‘hedgehugs & kisses’ and depicts two cartoon hedgehogs kissing. “It’s actually really cute.”

“Like I said, this was all Chelsea,” Lexi smiles, warmer than he’d seen her do before. “I managed to escape the pink by suggesting yellow but, I quite like the quotes and stuff. They make me think of her.” She sits on the bed and grabs a cable from underneath her bedside table. “Here.”

He walks over to her and plugs his phone in the cable, placing it on her bedside table. There’s a simple yellow lamp, an essential oil diffuser (a gift from Lottie), a large scrunchie, a half-full tube of Oreos, and _The Beautiful and The Damned_ by F. Scott Fitzgerald. 

“Thanks. It was nice of you to let me charge my phone.”

“I’m not completely heartless, I wasn’t exactly going to let you out on the streets with no way to get home,” she shrugs, watching him as he awkwardly stands in her room. She was sweaty and covered in alcohol from work, by now she’d be in the shower, but Bobby’s presence made that difficult. She couldn’t exactly leave him in her house while she showered, he could knick something! Even just the idea of a practical stranger looking round her flat made her feel a little awkward. And he looked awkward standing there.

“You want some tea or coffee or..?” She offers.

“No, thanks. I’m pretty tired I don’t wanna be on a coffee high,” he jokes.

“Fair enough. You’re welcome to take a seat, I’m going to get myself some tea.”

—-

“What am I doing? There’s a random man in my flat and I’ve left him alone in my bedroom? I swear if the girls could see me now they would not lay off,” Lexi mutters to herself as she bangs about the kitchen.

“Does it happen a lot?” A voice comes from behind her. _Well shit._

“What, random men in my flat? Not so much, I’m usually better… acquainted with them.” 

He chuckles. “What was that about you judging me for then?”

She sighs. “I didn’t say it happened every week.” She turns away from the kettle. Bobby watches as her dark thick eyebrows flatten on her forehead, in an unamused expression. “There’s nothing wrong with sleeping with a lot of people, I never actually said I judged you for that. It’s the way in which you do it which bugs me.”

He racks his brains. Actually, no. She hadn’t. She’d only said she didn’t like him, never why.

“I don’t like how full of yourself you are,” she continues. “You weasel out of any responsibility with jokes and the way you look, and you don’t seem to take anything seriously.”

“You got all that after three hours? Three hours in which I’ve helped you out,” he flashes his dimples. She shrugs. He would crack her eventually.

“It seems like you take things _too_ seriously,” considers Bobby playfully. “I think you oughta have a little more fun.”

“I do have fun,” she protests, “just not with a man who I barely know and don’t like.”

“Oof.” He stumbles back dramatically, clutching his chest as if he’d been struck in the heart. “I will change your mind,” he emphasises the future tense verb with his signature cheeky grin. She narrows her eyes at him, making sure he doesn’t see that as she turns back to the kettle, a small smile plays on her lips.

About ten minutes later, Lexi listens from the sofa as Bobby speaks on the phone from her bedroom.

“Hey, it’s me. You still okay to give me that lift?”

She couldn’t hear the woman on the other side, but was intensely curious at the sort of friends Bobby had. The sort that weren’t crane operators, anyway. When she’d met Gary earlier, it was obvious why the two of them worked. Both laddy, relaxed guys who operated on fun. It also intrigued her from what she knew of Bobby that he was able to keep women as friends. Women he wasn’t trying to sleep with. But then again, maybe she had been judging him a little too harshly.

“Yeah I’ll send you my location, it’s not far. But I want to see you anyway.”

She was suspicious. He’d said friend, but he sounded awfully eager. Maybe a friend with benefits?

“Actually, no!” He teases. “I’ll tell you all about it when I see you. Gary bailed pretty early. I was meant to too but-“ she doesn’t hear the next bit as he lowers his voice. Add this to the growing list of unanswered questions she had regarding Bobby McKenzie. A minute later he enters the main room with his phone hanging out of his jeans pocket.

“Cheers for the hospitality. My mate’s on her way,” he says.

“Well, I suppose I did kind of owe you for what you did at the bar.” She stands from the sofa.

“I don’t know, letting me into your humble abode and offering me drinks is a little nicer than about ten minutes worth of flirting to make some guy jealous.” He moves toward her.

“You walked me home too.”

“I’d say we’re even.” At this point, they’re standing about a ruler’s length apart. Bobby’s phone dings.

“She’s here,” he grins. Lexi holds out a hand for him to shake, but he scoffs at it and pulls her into a hug. “You’re a bit standoffish you know?” He mutters into her hair. She smirks, and lets her hands rest on his lean back, feeling it’s muscles and undulations. One of his hands plays with her hair, and the other sits in the small of her back. Lexi didn’t want to admit to herself how nice it was. They break apart.

“Well, I guess I’ll see you next time you’re at Koh’s.” Lexi stops towards the door and opens it for him to leave.

“Might be sooner than you think,” he winks, and exits through the door, shooting a salute towards her as he disappears from sight.

—-

She wakes up feeling tired in every part of her body. After Bobby had left she’d gone straight to bed, surpassing her shower or even changing her clothes. It had been a busy evening. First she’d had to work the bar for the first time in forever, awkwardly navigate around Lucas, then try and communicate with Bobby, and end up being with him for the next few hours. She hadn’t even heard Chelsea come home last night, if she even had. She groans, picks up a towel, and makes her way sluggishly to the bathroom to shower off last night. Under the hot water her mind keeps wandering to the enigma that is Bobby McKenzie. She considers his actions, his motivations, his intentions. She thinks about the way his lips curled round that cocktail stick the week before, and how his hand gripped his glass loosely. She thinks about his cocky demeanour, how he’d stood awkwardly in her bedroom, and the way his hands held her in their embrace. She considers the many things he could’ve said on the phone after the volume was too low for her to hear. But finally, she thinks of Lucas. What he’d thought seeing her flirt with Bobby. She remembers the tense nod he’d given her as she left, and smiles to herself, hoping it meant what she thought it meant. She hops out of the shower and wanders into the kitchen in her towel, when the lock starts turning. Chelsea squeals when she sees Lexi, running up to hug her, ignoring the fact that she’s soaking wet.

“Hey! I didn’t realise you stayed at Priya’s,” Lexi greets her, taking in the sweet smell of vanilla and fresh cotton which emulated Chelsea.

“It’s okay.” Chelsea breaks apart, “I won’t make you talk about it until you’re ready. BUT I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU!” She looks so happy but Lexi hasn’t a clue what she’s talking about. Had she heard about Lexi working the bar again? 

“Just one question.” Chelsea can’t take not knowing anything. “Was it a good night?” She sits at the barstool and plonks her elbows on the counter.

“I mean, I guess? It was pretty exhausting. I was on my feet the whole time so…” she shrugs.

Chelsea’s eyes widen and she lets out a giggle. Then she makes a zip across her mouth with her fingers, indicating she wouldn’t pry any further. Lexi is a little confused by it all, but she’d come to accept Chelsea’s oddities as part of loving her.

“Tea?” Lexi asks.

“Oooh that would be lovely! Tell you what, I’ll make it while you go and get dressed,” Chelsea jumps from the stool and shoos Lexi out of the way.

Chelsea and Lexi spend the day snacking and catching up on their Netflix binge of _Good Girls_ , cuddling up with cups of tea for the October chill. Chelsea makes some cheeky comments about the fact that she thinks Lexi got laid last night, but Lexi doesn’t catch on since it wasn’t even something she’d consider thinking about, let alone Chelsea knowing about. Soon enough it’s time for Lexi to head back to work. Saturdays were the worst, crazy busy nights which usually require a lot of cleaning, thus finishing at 2 or sometimes 3am. But it wasn’t so bad when the whole team took part.

——-

Lexi enters the empty staff room with a sigh to herself. It didn’t feel like she was only there less than 24 hours before. Not after the nights strange series of events. She doesn’t realise she’s not alone until Lucas clears his throat.

“Lexi,” he says, his voice deep and sharp. She turns to look at him slowly. He looks… odd. Bags under his dark eyes, and his hands clasped together in front of him like he’s gearing up for a fight. He’s wearing his uniform sans apron, his white shirt fitting tightly across his chest and slim black trousers hugging his legs.

“What’s up?” Asks Lexi, trying to hide the worry from her voice. He purses his lips and walks towards her so they’re standing very close to one another. Old feelings start to violate her senses and she has to focus hard to keep them at bay. He looks like he’s going to say something else before finally coming out with:

“So, Sarah’s in the hospital. Turns out she got into a pretty nasty car accident yesterday and she’ll need to be kept there for a while. Would you be okay filling in until we can get someone else to sign on for the weekend shifts? Of course you’ll be reimbursed accordingly.” He has that businessman slant on his words, it all sounds very clinical.

“Oh wow. That’s awful, I hope she’s okay. Of course I’ll help however I can,” Lexi gives him a small encouraging smile. He doesn’t let up.  
He hesitates again, biting his lip.

“Are you okay?” His face is filled with concern, searching for her answer. Lexi is utterly taken aback, since when was her wellbeing so important to Lucas? 

“What? Uh, yeah, of course I’m okay,” she lets out an awkward laugh. “I mean it’s a bit of a shock but it sounds like she’s gonna be okay? I never really spoke to her other than-“

“You-“ he swallows, like he’s trying to swallow the thought that’s about to cross his mind. “You went home with him. That regular. With…Bobby McKenzie.”

Lexi’s eyes go wide. That was not what she was expecting from that question. Especially not after finding out her colleague was in the hospital. Okay, she may have wanted to try and make Lucas a little jealous, but she wasn’t expecting him to actually ask her about it. Let alone look so judgey about it. She licks her lips nervously in search of what to say. On the one hand, she could tell Lucas the truth: _No! I would never! I like someone else…_ or, on the other hand, she could see how far she could be test Lucas. She straightens up, a sudden bout of confidence washing over her.

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business. You’re just my manager.” Her voice is calm and collected and she looks him straight in the eye.

He grits his teeth. “He’s bad news. I’m not allowed to worry about my colleagues?” Hearing him call her that stings a little, not that she’d expected anything else.

“When it involves snooping in my personal life, no. You’re not.” She crosses her arms over her chest and continues to look him in the eye.

“It’s hardly a personal life when you’re flirting with him in my bar for everyone to see.” His voice is dark and harsh, and he moves his face an inch or so away. 

“That’s ridiculous. We were just talking, it was harmless,” she laughs darkly.

“Maybe, until you went home with him.”

“Stop acting like you care Lucas. We don’t talk anymore, remember?” She _knows_ how bad it looks. She knows by not saying now that her and Bobby barely even touched would bite her in the ass later. But right now? She doesn’t care.

She tries to ignore her previous desperate attempts to make nice with Lucas, her messages through Lottie and trying not to bug him when on the job. He wasn’t allowed to act like this. Not after everything.

Before he can respond, the door squeaks open and Lottie saunters in.

“Oh, hey guys.” 

Lucas jumps away from Lexi, putting as much space between them as possible. He runs a hand down his face. Lottie eyes the two of them. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Not at all. Nothing important, anyway,” Lexi snaps, before strutting out of the staff room.

“It feels pretty tense in here, Lucas,” Lottie turns to him, frown lines forming between her eyebrows.

“It’s not a big deal, she’s just annoyed about her new job until we find a better bartender.”


	6. Just Follow My Lead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby and Lexi advance their plan, and Lexi bumps into Lucas outside of work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Time To Pretend - MGMT  
> This Charming Man - The Smiths  
> Feels Like We Only Go Backwards - Tame Impala

“Lexi. Seriously? I know something was going on back there. Is he being a dick?” Lottie asks Lexi in the storeroom after Lucas has stalked back through to the bar.

“It’s fine. He just wants me to step up as a bartender until someone else agrees to work the weekend shifts.”

“I mean, that’s not really fair?”

“It’s really okay. It’s what I was trained for anyway I guess.” She pulls her hair back into a small ponytail at the nape of her neck, and blows her bangs out of her eyes with her mouth. “I’m getting paid more so I can’t really complain.”

“Uh, you can absolutely complain!” Lottie was always the one to say everything how she felt, which Lexi admired, but couldn’t really apply to her own life.

“I know I _can_ Lottie but is it really gonna help anything? I might as well just get on with the job and take the temporary pay rise. At least I don’t have to fight with the dishwasher so much.”

“Then who _is_ going to be fighting the dishwasher?”

She shrugs. “I dunno. Lucas’ problem to solve. Soon enough my parents are gonna leave me to fend for myself so I’ll take all the extra money I can get, I just don’t have the means to fight about it. I prefer being a bartender anyway, it is what I applied for after all…” 

Lottie looks at her friend warmly and nods, secretly wondering how they really couldn’t get another employee available.

The night starts off easier than it goes on, the usual scrabble of drinks and laughter and background music. But it wasn’t so bad with the three of them. Lexi took every opportunity she could to ignore Lucas, to show he hadn’t gotten to her earlier, that he didn’t still have a hold over her.

It took a little while before she saw him. He took the moment to admire her at work, the gleaming smiles she gave the customers, the way she danced round the bar, knowing where everything was, the way her heavy furrowed brow was still visible underneath her feathery bangs as she made the drinks, how she reached up to twirl her helix earring nervously in the few moments she wasn’t busy. He really didn’t know a single thing about her. He couldn’t pin down what she was actually like, except maybe when he thinks back to the way she talked about Chelsea the night before, how her smile warmed his insides, or how she practically cackled at Bobby’s funny flirty face. There was no doubt about it. She had walls up and now he just had to know why. He wasn’t really sure why his feet had taken him to the bar after work, but here he was, and there was no point wasting the moment. His gait is confident and smooth as he makes his way to the bar. This is when Lexi sees him. He’s wearing a colourful shirt and khaki trousers, much more relaxed and casual than she’d seen him before. His signature smirk plays on his lips but his eyes look tired. He reaches the bar and leans on it with his forearm. He clears his throat and make sure he’s speaking loudly enough for Lucas to hear, who is right by Lexi, making his drink.

“I didn’t get your number last night,” he proclaims.

She furrows her brow, “I wasn’t-“ 

_“Just play along,”_ he whispers, motioning subtly to where Lucas stands, and has stopped mid drink making. She nods.

“I had to make you work for it.”

“I feel I’ve done quite a lot of work here.”

“Oh, alright then.” She grabs a piece of paper from the notepad in her pocket. She turns to Lucas.

“Lucas, do you have a pen?” She asks sweetly. She wasn’t only doing it to annoy him, she didn’t actually have one currently, but his reaction didn’t hurt. He sticks his tongue into his cheek, not believing that this is actually happening.

“No,” is all he says, before stomping over to the other side of the bar. Bobby laughs.

“Looks like we did a good job last night. Unless he actually just hates your guts.”

Lexi laughs, her face going a little red.

“What are you doing here? Didn’t peg you as the two-night bender type.”

“Hey, I’m never gonna turn down a two night party. But I’m not staying, I just came to check in.” He’s cocky, but doesn’t quite meet her eyes as he says this.

“You jumped on the tube to come all the way here and not even get a drink?” She teases.

“Nah. I’ve just finished at work. It’s like a 20 minute walk.” For some reason, Lexi is taken aback by this. She just hadn’t even imagined Bobby with a job. It was like he existed in the bar and the bar only, and realising that he was actually like, a real life person with real life things, kinda threw her off. Even if he had been at her flat only hours before.

“Where do you work?” Asks Lexi, now hideously curious to find out more about him.

“The university hospital.”

“Don’t tell me you’re a doctor.” She’s surprised. _I mean, I suppose he could be. But, it’s so different from what I know about him, and he’d surely be at work more often if that was the case_ , she thinks.

“Well obviously? How else would I know how to cure your broken heart?” teases Bobby, leaning across the bar to really amp up the grin.

She eyes him for a moment, questioning herself. “You’re not, right?”

“Nah. I’m a caterer there, much more fun if you ask me.” He laughs at her intuition. She wants to know more, but is cut off by Bobby’s cheery Scottish accent. “I should be off though, don’t want to end up staying and getting drunk.”

“Yeah, course.” She really should be getting back to work anyway. Damn this boy for distracting her.

“But, you didn’t actually give me your number earlier. I might need it,” he places his head on one of his hands and wears an expectant smile.

“Hm. I can’t think what for.” She considers the idea. She could just give him a fake number, but part of her was actually interested to see if he would text her, and what he might say. “Ok.” She starts to recite her number and Bobby quickly enters it into his phone.

“Now you can make him jealous without me even being here,” Bobby grins. “Ta-ra!” He waves and backs away from the bar to make his way to the door. Lexi watches as he disappears, he doesn’t look back.

—-

On Sunday morning, Chelsea rearranges a bouquet of flowers she’d picked up. Chelsea had deliberately picked flowers which meant ‘get well soon’: daisies, peonies, hydrangeas, and pansies, in various colours and hues.

“Thank you Chels, you’re really an angel. I seriously don’t know what I’d do without you,” Lexi sighs as she comes into the kitchen dressed in flared jeans and a turtleneck, hair still wet from the shower.

“That’s what friends are for! I’m coming with you by the way, I need a Costa,” Chelsea sighs dramatically.

Lexi laughs. “Sweet. You ready to go?” She throws on her jacket and her bag over her shoulder.

“Yes! Let’s hit the road.”

—-

They ride the tube until they reach the hospital, bouquet in Lexi’s arms.

“I’ll be just there if you need me!” Chelsea points a couple of roads away to the nearest Costa. “Want me to get you anything?”

“Go on then, an iced americano would do me well. See you in a bit.”

They hug and Lexi enters the University College Hospital. After finding out where she needs to be, Lexi heads up the stairs to the room she’s looking for.

Lexi’s phone dings as she reaches the top of the stairs, the text is from an unknown number and doesn’t appear to have a message. She already knows it must be Bobby. She clicks into it to see only a WikiHow article called “How to Make Your Boyfriend Jealous: 10 Steps (With Pictures)”

She reads through the article and goes to text Bobby back.

 **Lexi** : thanks for the pictures, I can’t read.  
**Lexi** : he’s still not my boyfriend tho.

 **Bobby** : did u read number 4 :)

 **Lexi** : yeah, but ur not my guy friend

 **Bobby** : nah I’m worse. I’m scarier than ur guy friends😈  
**Bobby** : it says they have to make u laugh. I’ve already completed that step✅  
**Bobby** : ok look I know it’s a shitty article (number 6🤮) but at least tell me u found it funny

 **Lexi** : i guess…  
**Lexi** :🙄🙄  
**Lexi** : i’m betting u ten quid a man wrote that article  
**Lexi** : or just a woman suffering w internalised misogyny

 **Bobby** : innit. ‘Buy sexy clothing’😋🤪😍😉

 **Lexi** : your emoji use is unbearable

 **Bobby** : it’s ironic!

She tries to hide that she’s smiling to herself and slides her phone back into her pocket.

“Hey,” she smiles as she enters the room where Sarah lays on the bed, wearing a cast on her arm and sporting some rather nasty bruises and scrapes.

“Lexi!” She’s surprised, but not unwelcoming. 

“I brought you some flowers.” Lexi places the bouquet on the table next to Sarah’s hospital bed.

“They’re beautiful, thank you. It was so lovely for you to come and see me.”

“That’s no problem. You must be feeling pretty shitty.”

“Yeah…not great,” she laughs, “especially when I woke up reading like, 20 angry text messages from Lucas.”  
Lexi sits on the visitor chair. Lucas didn’t know at the time of course, but that must’ve felt pretty bad.

“It’s alright, I came to the rescue,” Lexi jokes. “I think he probably feels pretty bad about it.”

“Oh, I know. He texted me back as soon as I let him know what had happened with a fat off apology. It’s quite funny actually,” Sarah laughs. Lexi joins in, and they giggle at lighthearted small talk. They didn’t speak much, but at the end of the day they still worked together and Lexi wanted Sarah to feel better soon. After a few minutes, they are interrupted by a nurse:

“You’ve got another visitor, Sarah,” he smiles before continuing on his way. Sarah, from what little of her face is visible, looks confused. That’s when he steps into the room. Tall, handsome, perhaps even more so in his casual skinny jeans and and dark blue button up. He smiles at Sarah before his eyes settle on Lexi.

“Oh, hi. I wasn’t expecting you to be here.” He flushes light pink.

“Hey, Lucas,” Sarah smiles. “You really didn’t have to come, your text was lovely.” She looks a little uncomfortable at all the attention.

He clears his throat. He’s also holding flowers, but his look far more expensive than Lexi’s.

“I think it’s about time I take off. Look after yourself,” Lexi stands, walking over to Sarah to place a comforting hand on her arm.

“Yeah no problem. Nice to see you,” She nods gently a goodbye. Lexi practically runs out of the room, without even a glance at Lucas, who is still pink. She walks back down the corridor to the stairs she climbed before, and starts to walk down. She’s just leaving through the front door when she hears him.

“Lexi! Hold up.” He hasn’t got his flowers anymore, clearly leaving them with Sarah.

“What?” She turns slowly.

“I don’t want you to be angry at me.” He looks pleading, not something Lexi was at all familiar with in the time she’d known him.

“Angry at you? Lucas we’ve barely spoken at all since last year, why the hell do you care if I’m angry at you?”

“I’m- I’ve not been handling -this-“ he motions between them “well.” He’s panting slightly, as though he’d run after her. She felt guilty, but she couldn’t let that infiltrate the overriding feeling of frustration over everything. All the time she had spent moping and pining with no reciprocation, and he’s acting like she’s his to lose. It was what part of her had wanted for the whole time, but the other part resented him for it. 

Lexi exhales loudly. “You’re a bit late for that.”

“I just wasn’t happy with the way we left things last night. You’re right. It’s none of my business.” Lucas knows he’s right, but that doesn’t change the fact he wants it to be his business.

“Thanks.”

There’s silence.

“Is that it?” She asks curtly.

“I guess…”

“Then I’ve got somewhere to be.” She pushes past Lucas. He’s _still_ not handling it well, and she can’t be bothered to do all the work. Her phone dings again.

 **Bobby** : www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/news/amp35102/things-women-do-that-make-guys-jealous/

“Is that him?” Lucas asks from behind her. “I saw you two last night.”

She turns back on her heel snappily. 

“I thought you JUST said it wasn’t your business?”

He bites his tongue, not saying what he really wants to say.


	7. Girls’ Night Out!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lottie proposes a girls night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is sort of filler-y, sorry about that!
> 
> Chapter playlist:  
> Girls On Film - Duran Duran  
> Girls Just Wanna Have Fun - Cyndi Lauper  
> Money - Cardi B

Once Chelsea and Lexi return home, Lexi opens up her texts to reply to Bobby.

 **Lexi** : cosmo is just as bad if not worse than wikihow

 **Bobby** : exactly🤢 did u read it  
**Bobby** : number 1,2,&6 🥵

 **Lexi** : yeah i’ve got the point now thanks  
**Lexi** : pretty sure most of these only work if you’re actually dating someone

 **Bobby** : number 3? girls night?🥳💋💃

 **Lexi** : is pointless if he doesn’t know it’s happening

 **Bobby** : 😉 

What?? This boy is _so_ confusing. Just then, Lexi’s phone rings. It’s Lottie?

“Hey,” she says with a question in her voice.

“Hey! Are you working next Saturday?” Lottie asks quickly.

“I mean yeah, I assume so given the whole Sarah thing. What’s up?” 

“Well you didn’t hear it from me but apparently Beom-Seok’s coming in.” Beom-Seok Ko is Lucas’ dad – the big boss – and he’s kinda scary.

“Oh shit-“ Lexi starts.

“Which means…” Lottie cuts her off, “he’s probably got some kind of business meeting going on at the bar and won’t open it to the public. So…”

“Oh.” Lexi perks up. “Well this could be fun. What were you thinking?”

“Girls night!” She sings. _Wait. What?_

“Have you been speaking to Bobby?” Lexi asks.

“Bobby McKenzie? From the bar?”

“Yeah.”

“What?” She laughs. “No? What’s Bobby McKenzie got to do with this?”

Lexi squints her eyes. Something seems fishy.

“Nothing, I guess. So, yes. Girls night! I’ll ask Priya and Chelsea if they’re free.”

“Awesome. Hannah’s already up for it, if she takes her head out of Mr Darcy’s ass for a few hours anyway.”

Lexi laughs. “It’ll be fun. I can’t wait.”

“So why the fuck did you think I’d been talking to Bobby McKenzie?” Lottie asks.

“He texted me something weird. I don’t know, don’t worry.”

“He’s been texting you?” Lottie asks and Lexi can almost hear Lottie raise her eyebrows from the other side of the phone. “I knew there was something happening there.”

“I’m gonna go talk to Chels about Saturday. See you tomorrow,” Lexi rushes out, avoiding the question.

Lottie sighs. “We’ll talk about this then when I have girls and alcohol to back me up.”

“Okayyy byeeeeee.”

—-

“Chels! What you doing on Saturday?” Lexi pokes her head into the the living area where Chelsea is scrolling through Pinterest on the sofa.

Chelsea’s eyes goes wide as she turns to face Lexi. 

“Please tell me we’re going out!”

“Lottie just called for a girls night, guess you’re in then?” Lexi beams, coming to sit next to Chelsea.

“Obviously! We have to go tell Priya! It’s been too long since you two have had the night off work. Is Hannah coming?” Chelsea word-vomits.

“Apparently so! Come on then,” Lexi pats the underside of Chelsea’s leg to indicate they’re off to Priya’s. Lexi hadn’t told Chelsea about her altercation with Lucas, but she knew looking forward to this night would help her forget about it. 

The girls bound across the hall and knock excitedly on Priya’s door. She opens up looking preppy in workout gear with her hair tied back. 

“What’s up? Wanna join me for some Pilates?” She asks.

“Oooh Priya guess what?” Chelsea bounces excitably from one foot to the other.

“Go on…” 

“Girls night, Saturday. You in?” Lexi answers.

“Uh, duh? Of course I’ll be there,” Priya beams.

“So we’ll obviously have pres at ours, and then go for a 2 for 1 at vodka revs, and then we’ll hit the cluuuub!! And obviously everyone will come back here to sleepover. And then we can go for brunch on Sunday! Or… maybe order brunch in…” Chelsea trails off as she considers what state they might be in on Sunday morning. Priya laughs.

“That might be wise babe. Sounds perfect.”

—-

While Lexi and Lottie sit in the staff room on their break on Thursday, the group chat receives an interesting notification. 

**Girls on Tour!**

**Lottie** : just got the all clear from lucas, saturday is a go  
_Seen on Wednesday_

 **Hannah** : Noah’s just texted me! Apparently he’s met someone👀👀

Hannah works with Noah at the local library while she works on her book. He is their friend, but a little less forthcoming about doing things or going places with them. They’d all met when Hannah had invited him out with them for drinks one night, and they’d all warmed up to the sweet quiet man he was. The girls felt a little protective over him. The group chat notification dings again.

**Girls on Tour!**

**Chelsea** : OMG!xx 

**Lottie** : about time, he’s way too handsome to stay single. bit quiet for me ofc but🤷🏼♀

 **Priya** : well, that’s a shame

 **Lexi** : i think we need to meet this mysterious girl

 **Hannah** : Her name is Hope!! How cute is that! It sounds like a real fairytale romance🥺

 **Lexi** : no more cracking on for you then priya 

**Chelsea** : Priya could have any man she wants she’ll be fine xx  
**Chelsea** : Hannah invite her to Girls’ Night!! We can make new friends!xx

 **Lottie** : hold on a minute, i’m not sure how I feel about being infiltrated by someone we don’t know

 **Lexi** : i think it’s a nice idea. let’s start pres really early so we’ve got lots of time to chat and catch up and invite her to come along a bit later. 

**Priya** : i don’t mind. It’ll certainly make Noah feel less nervous to introduce us, and I’m intrigued to meet the woman who’s managed to get past all his… business

 **Hannah** : Lottie?? Shall I ask him??

 **Lottie** : ugh, fine. as long as we pre early like lexi said.

 **Chelsea** : YAAAY!!🥳🥳 Okay so you girls get to ours at 7pm, and we’ll ask Hope to come at 8:30? Then we can jump on the tube or split a taxi at 10 ish to get to revs for 10:30, and stay there for about an hour before we hit the club!xx

 **Hannah** : Vodka revs? Why don’t we use the girls’ discount at Koh’s?

 **Lottie** : there’s a reason we’ve got the night off, han. just let chelsea do the planning and don’t ask any questions.

The chat is silent for a few moments before Hannah texts back.

 **Hannah** : He says she’s in!! I’m so excited☺️

—-

The latter half of the week passes quickly, until Saturday morning rolls around.

“Lexi!” Chelsea practically jumps into Lexi’s bedroom, disrupting her slumber. Lexi moans under the duvet. “We have to make sure we’re ready for tonight!”

“We’ve got hours, Chels,” she grunts into her pillow. But Chelsea is having none of it, and rips the covers clean off Lexi’s bed, before sauntering over to the curtains and pulling them open enthusiastically.

“Oh, fine. But let me have some cereal first,” Lexi sits up slowly.

They clean the flat from top to bottom, Chelsea puts up some shiny silver bunting and pulls out all the spirits to place on the kitchen counter. Lexi pops to the cornershop to buy every kind of mixer they can think of; orange juice, lemonade, coke, tonic water, tropical juice, the list goes on. They concoct a questionable punch in their mixing bowl consisting of Echo Falls, rum, lemonade, tropical juice, and grenadine syrup. They make up extra sets of Duvets in case anyone wants to sleep on the sofa, and also prepare an empty washing up bowl in case anyone is sick. On the coffee table, they place 6 shot glasses and a pack of cards so their bases are all covered for drinking games. By the time they’re ready, it’s 4pm.

“We only have 3 hours!!” Chelsea screeches, running to the shower. “My fake tan needs to come off NOW!”

Lexi starts preparing an early dinner so they aren’t uncomfortably full or bloated later on, but enough to line their stomachs for the drinking. She sets it to the side to cook after her shower, and jumps in once Chelsea is done washing off her fake tan and shaving. Once they’ve eaten the girls go to their bedrooms to get dressed and do their makeup. Multiple times, one girl would go to the other’s room to ask about an outfit. Finally, after what feels like forever, they step into the living area.

Chelsea has part of her short hair up in cute little space buns, and wears a warm taupe eyeshadow and nude-pink lip. She’s wearing a pink crop-top and shiny silver skirt.

“You look lovely,” Lexi smiles as Chelsea gives her a little spin. Lexi has her short brown hair and bangs down but straight, a change from her natural waves, with purple eyeshadow, black eyeliner and a simple lip gloss. She is wearing a loose mesh top over a bralette and a denim skirt.

“You look lovelier!” Chelsea squees. Lexi wears a dishevelled pair of black Dr Marten shoes, and Chelsea wears a similarly battered pair of Nike Air Force’s, which used to be white. They’d since learned from their attempts once they’d turned 18, that nice shoes and high heels were not compatible for clubbing. There’s a knock at the door.

“Priya!!” Chelsea yells, bounding over to the door and flinging it open. Priya wears a short cowl neck orange dress and black ballet pumps. Her hair is waved smoothly down her back.

“Let’s get this party started!” She’s holding a bottle of red wine and her own wine glass, which is already half full.

“Jesus Priya you’re gonna be wankered,” Lexi laughs as Priya comes in and sits on the sofa.

“My tolerance is way higher than all you lightweights so I’ve gotta even out the playing field.”

“We’ve got half an hour before they’ll get here!” Chelsea says. “And they WILL be here on time I made sure of it. None of that fashionably late nonsense for Girls Night when we can all be late to the club together!”

And she’s right. Lottie and Hannah arrive together at 7:01pm, both holding their beverages of choice and dressed for the club.

“I am so ready for this,” Lottie plops herself on the floor dramatically and uncorks her fancy looking gin. She grabs a shot glass and immediately shots some gin.

“Lottie! You have to call SHOTS so we can all do one!” Chelsea chastises, but she’s grinning from ear to ear.

The girls do a quick rundown of how they’re doing, what their week was like, and talk about the night ahead of them.

“Right,” Lexi says, “I say it’s time for a drinking game. I know we’ve got a long pres ahead of us but we’ll slow down later.” She is trying to convince herself as much as anyone else. 

“Can we play ring of fire?” Hannah gasps.

Priya scoffs. “You really should’ve gone to uni Hannah. We are NOT playing ring of fire.”  
The others murmur in agreement.

“Fine, then you decide what we play!” Hannah harrumphs with a sip of her rosè.

“What about one of those drinking games where you put a film on and have to drink every time they do something tropey!” Chelsea suggests. No one jumps at the idea.

“We’ll play electricity,” Priya states confidently.

“Alright, that I can do,” Lexi grins, getting up to pour herself a vodka and coke. “Come and get your drinks guys.”

“What’s electricity?” Hannah asks.

“Okay so, we’ve all got a hand of cards and each number is worth a second of time. So I put down a four of hearts, I have to drink for four seconds. If you’re next, Hannah, and you have a four of clubs, then you have to drink for four seconds – but so do I, because we’ve got the same number. Then Lottie plays an ace of clubs. Which means you both have to drink, but I don’t, because your match is the suit not the number. But Hannah is still only four, whereas Lottie is eleven seconds. Got it?”

Hannah groans uneasily. “I think so? So every card is the time we drink for, but if the person after or before me has the same number or suit as me I have to drink with them too?”

“Yep!” Lexi says as she sits back down on the floor to the left of Chelsea.

“Simple enough to understand,” Lottie agrees.

“Let’s get some music up in this bitch!” Priya jumps up, going to plug her phone into the speaker in the kitchen, and plays ‘Money’ by Cardi B. The girls all cheer and dance in their seats.

They start the game, chanting down the number of seconds each player must drink for and cheering once they’re done. The game wears thin after a few rounds, and everyone is beginning to feel a little buzzed. Lottie and Hannah chat conspiratorially about the placement of the stars and how each of the girls’ star signs would be affected by it. Priya, Chelsea, and Lexi laugh about the fact they’re already tipsy.

“I say we all have some of mine and Lexi’s amazing punch then… shot roulette??” Chelsea stands up and clasps her hands together hopefully.

“I might be sick if we play shot roulette,” Hannah sighs. They all stand and go to the punch bowl, ladelling the strong mixture into their glasses. 

“This is… actually really good,” Lottie nods.

“It’s our own special blend! I won’t tell you what’s in it,” Chelsea giggles. Everyone knows she’ll tell them all later when she’s drunker and forgotten her secret. 

“I’ll do shots of this…” Hannah says uneasily. Priya places a comforting hand on her back as she gulps back the punch.

“Shot roulette is not compulsory,” Lexi smiles at Hannah. 

“It’s nearly 8:30,” Chelsea says, “I wonder when Hope will be here?”

As if on cue, the doorbell rings.


	8. What a Kwinkydink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls go to the club, and the night doesn’t go quite as expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Disorder - Joy Division  
> Gecko (Overdrive) - Oliver Heldens, Becky Hill  
> Piece of Your Heart - MEDUZA, Goodboys

The sound of the doorbell rings out over the music and everyone stops. Chelsea screeches and rushes to the door with everyone in tow aside from Lottie, who stays back a bit apprehensively. They open the door to a stunning woman on the other side. She’s tall and slim and wears a beautiful yellow two piece, her braids in a neat ponytail.

“Hey!” She smiles confidently. Lexi likes her already. “I’m Hope.”

Chelsea immediately envelops her in a hug. “I’m so excited to meet you! I’m Chelsea, this is mine and Lexi’s place.”

Hope hugs her back warmly. “I bought a bag with wine and stuff, am I okay to leave it here? I can come pick it up tomorrow.”

“Didn’t Noah tell you? Everyone’s staying round here tonight! Come in, come in,” Chelsea ushers her in and shuts the door behind them. 

“Oh! He probably wanted me all to himself.” She chuckles. “I’d love to stay with you girls.”

“Hi! I’m Hannah, I work with Noah!” Hannah steps forward and gives a little wave, she’s a bit too shy for hugging at this stage.

“Priya,” Priya says, leaning in to air kiss hope. “You’re stunning by the way!”

“Says you! You’re gorgeous,” Hope says back, holding Priya’s arms.

“I’m Lexi, Chelsea’s flatmate,” Lexi leans in to hug Hope as well. She smells like strawberries.

“Lottie,” Lottie struts forward, clearly feeling a little more sure about Hope, and also air kisses her.

“You girls are all so beautiful, I can’t wait to get to know you all!” She sniffs the air. “Oh god you’re all buzzed already aren’t you. I need to catch up!” 

Chelsea directs Hope to her bedroom where she can put down her bag, and Priya pours her a glass of punch.

“It’s strong. You’ll be there in no time,” Lexi chuckles.

“We were about to play shot roulette,” Lottie raises an eyebrow. Hope makes a face.

“Okay. I’m in. I’m a bit scared though.” 

Lexi and Chelsea fill up some shot glasses with Rum, Gin, Vodka, Malibu, Tequila, and Water, then scramble them all around in the table so no one knows what’s what. They arrange them in a circle and place Priya’s empty wine bottle in the middle. There are a total of 5 of each drink, so 5 rounds in total.

“I bet Hannah’s the lucky sod who ends up getting water every time,” Lottie grimaces as she moves to take the first spin. 

Sure enough, Hannah ends up getting three of of the five waters, and Lexi gets none. At this point, the girls are drunk and dancing around the flat. Everyone has almost immediately warmed to Hope and she’s fitting in like she’d been there all along. She has been telling Lexi and Priya about her and Noah, and they swoon over their relationship. 

Lottie’s phone then pings with a notification and she is unable to hide the blush which forms on her face.

“Who’s that?” Hannah slurs, trying to see over Lottie’s shoulder. Lottie shows her and Hannah gasps excitedly.

“Go on! Tell us!” Lexi coaxes.

“It’s… Gary. You know from the bar?” Admits Lottie sheepishly. She doesn’t quite meet Lexi’s eyes, and Lexi knows this is a sign that she’s genuinely interested in the guy. And also pretty drunk.

“Bobby’s friend?” Lexi gasps with a slight slur.  
Lottie blushes. 

“You fancy him!” Chelsea sings.

“We’ve just been texting a bit…” Lottie smiles as she looks back down at her phone, then realises and stops again.

“Tell us the deets, girl!” Chelsea exclaims.

“There’s nothing really to tell.”

“You’re beetroot red, you definitely fancy him.” Hannah encourages.

“Lexi’s been texting Bobby!” Lottie blurts out defensively, pointing an accusatory finger at Lexi.  
All eyes turn to Lexi. Chelsea nudges Priya and lets out a little giggle. Priya hushes her to stop making it so obvious.

“Okay! Enough of this… “ Lexi’s trying to hide her own blush. She couldn’t tell the girls why she was really texting Bobby, because she knew it would somehow find it’s way back to Lucas that it had only started as a little way to make him jealous and had kinda blown itself out of proportion, and that would probably end up with him more angry than he already was. She remembers her and Bobby’s oddly psychic conversation earlier in the week about Girls’ night. Lexi manages to steer the conversation back to something which didn’t involve her, and pres continued with the same energy as before.

—-

They’d kind of all speechlessly agreed that actually, they were going to skip vodka revs. They were all drunk enough already, and it was unnecessary spending in an overcrowded place when they could continue bonding at home. When it reaches 11:00pm, Chelsea suggests getting on the tube. It would take a half hour to get to the club, then they’d probably have to queue for a while anyway. The girls walk through the park all giggles and stumbles, chatting absolute nonsense.

“I am so getting on someone tonight,” Priya holds her hands up to the sky.

“It’s so fucking cold,” Lottie protests. “Why do girls always do this? Why don’t we wear jackets on a night out in the middle of October?” She folds her arms into herself.

“It’s not that cold! You wait till January,” Hope laughs.

“Cloak room is soooo expensive,” Hannah drawls.

“Exactly! Entry is already pricey enough and none of us can afford to spend too much. Especially since I know-“ Lexi points an accusatory finger at Priya, “you’ll make us get shots at the club.”

Priya holds her hands up defensively but doesn’t argue. 

“Girls we’re gonna have so much fun! It’s been too long! And we have Hope this time!” Chelsea enthuses, locking her arm into Hopes as she skips along.

The tube is fun, the girls have drunk conversations and talk to strangers, complimenting them on random things, and every time the tannoy announces a new stop, Hannah asks if it’s theirs. When it finally is theirs, she squeals happily.

—-

The music pumps the walls and floors of the club, feeling the beat all in and around themselves. Flashing colourful lights spin round the large room and the floor is sticky to walk on. Everyone is drunk, Chelsea and Hannah hold each other up in an odd sort of embrace, and Lexi wonders how any of them made it past the bouncers. 

“You know, I still freak out every time that they think I’ve got a fake,” Lexi shouts over the music to Priya. 

“Lexi, you’re 23! You’ve been clubbing legitimately for 5 years. God, you’re making me feel old now.”

“You don’t worry about it?”

“No! Come on, let’s dance.”

The girls get to the dance floor and make their own little circle, swaying and grinding to the music. Everyone takes turns to dance with each other and the music glides through songs.

Lexi scans the room to see how busy it is. Her eyes fall on him over by the bar. It’s his back, but she knows it’s him. He has this cool, collected stance which shows he isn’t all too serious. He turns to the side slightly to take his shot, and Lexi watches the lines of his neck lengthen, and his Adam’s apple bob up and down. Next to him stands Gary, and two women she doesn’t recognise. She wonders if one of them is his friend from the other night. She turns away, trying to ignore the fact that out of all the coincidences, her and Bobby end up in the same club out of the many in London, on the same night. There’s this odd feeling in her stomach, but she can’t quite place it. It’s probably nausea from all the alcohol. She brushes it off and continues dancing.

Moments later, Lexi feels a hand on the small of her back, and hot breath on her ear.

“You must be one hell of a thief, because you stole my heart from across the room.” She knows it’s Bobby just from his accent. His tone is playful, but the way his warm breath falls on Lexis ear makes her shiver. Unable to control herself in her drunk state, Lexi smiles. She turns to face him. He looks particularly attractive under the club lights and through Lexi’s beer goggles. He’s wearing another floral shirt, with short sleeves, tucked into blue jeans. She leans up to his ear.

“Classy, is that how you get all the ladies?” It’s the only way they can hear each other over the loud music, by leaning in to the other’s ear, but it feels intimate all the same.

“That’s how it’s done. I feel like I should be giving your mate Lucas a few pointers,” Bobby chuckles. Little did he know just how much of a ladies man Lucas was, just not with Lexi.

“I really don’t believe that’s ever worked for you,” she retaliates, hands resting on his shoulders to reach up that little bit for his ear.

“Doesn’t my reputation speak for itself?” He pulls away and that damn smirk is plastered all over his face, because he knows he’s right. He turns his attention to Lottie, embracing her in a friendly hug and whispering something in her ear that Lexi can’t decipher. It makes Lottie laugh and blush. He then goes round introducing himself to all the girls, causing Chelsea to giggle a lot, and Priya has a playful smile on her face. Lottie motions that she’s going up to the smokers’ area, and everyone follows. None of them smoke, but it’s a necessary moment of not-so-fresh air as a break from the sweaty club. It also makes it easier to talk.

“So, what are you doing here?” Lexi asks Bobby as they step into the cool night air, clouded with cigarette fumes. Just as she says this, Gary emerges through the door and comes up to the group. He grins at Bobby but immediately greets Lottie with a kiss on the cheek. Bobby points at them.

“Gary’s idea.”

“Hold on. Gary knew we were out tonight?”

“Obviously, how else do you think I knew _you’d_ be out tonight.” 

She thinks back on their conversation.

“What the hell! You plotted this. It’s really unlike Lottie to derail a girls’ night for the sake of a guy. She’s all about her girls.”

“She probably didn’t. Gary didn’t actually tell her we’d be out tonight. He just put the idea of a night out in her head.”

“And thus here they are,” Lexi turns to watch them flirting with each other away from the rest of the girls, who are muttering and moving their eyes between Lottie and Gary, and Lexi and Bobby. Bobby starts laughing at the two of them.

“That’s crease. I can’t believe it worked.” He’s laughing with his whole body.

“Why didn’t he just ask her on a date like a normal person?”

Bobby shrugs, but there’s a glint of something he isn’t telling her in his eyes.

“Kill two birds with one stone. Remember what I said? Girls night was on the jealousy article…” he trails off with a mocking face.

“Yeah but Lucas doesn’t even know I’m here. He likely doesn’t care,” says Lexi.

“Oh he knows,” Bobby grins. Lexi shoots him a puzzled look, so he continues. “Lottie’s got a big mouth, Gary talks to Lottie. Lottie tells Lucas how she’s spending her night off. Boom. Lucas knows you’re on girls night. I know how to work a situation.” He looks very proud of himself.

“I suppose I should give you some credit,” she sighs. They return to the group and head back inside.

After a lot more dancing, Lexi and Chelsea head to the bar to get some water. Lottie is no where to be found, and Hope, Priya, and Hannah dance the night away. At the bar stands Bobby once again, but this time just with the two girls Lexi had seen him with before. One is quite short, with dark blonde hair and striking red lipstick, and the other is tall and slim with shiny brown hair and looks like she could be a model. He sees Lexi and Chelsea and makes his way over to them with his friends.

“This is Marisol and Elisa. I baked their anniversary cake and now we’re mates,” he motions to the two of them. They both smile at the two girls.

“And this is Lexi, my new friend, and her friend Chelsea,” Bobby smirks at his introduction. 

“Hey, nice to meet you!” Elisa comes towards them to air kiss them in a smooth, instagram-able movement, then Marisol pulls out a hand to shake theirs.

“So it was your flat he was at the other week?” Marisol smiles subtly. She looks like she’s trying to figure something out. Chelsea tries suppress a giggle. Bobby is wearing that cheeky smirk and leaving Lexi to fend for herself.

“Yeah, I guess. But it’s not like-“

“And I thank you once again for your kind hospitality,” Bobby butts in, finally relieving Lexi.

“I’m sure you do,” Giggles Chelsea, placing her hand over her mouth. _Oh no._ Lexi finally realises why Chelsea has been acting so weird. _I’ve got myself into quite a large hole here._


	9. Saturday Night Fever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang spend the night at the club, and the morning after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Feel So Close - Calvin Harris  
> Late Night Feelings - Mark Ronson, Lykke Li  
> I Think I’m OKAY - Machine Gun Kelly, YUNGBLUD, Travis Barker

“Chels, you know Bobby? What do you think is happening there?” Lexi asks as the girls wash their hands in the bathroom.

“I think you’re a bit smitten! It’s so cute. He seems lovely!” She gushes.

“Ah, no, Chelsea I’m not interested.”

“He’s such a good change from Lucas. And he seems so fun!” Chelsea blots her forehead with a tissue.

“He’s not my cup of tea. I don’t really like him, Chels.”

“Alright, alright I’ll keep your secret! Come on babe!”

“No seriously-“ but before she can protest further Chelsea has run back into the dance floor. “I need another drink,” she sighs and follows her friend out of the bathroom.

—-

Lexi and Priya take a photo together on the dance floor, Lexi kissing Priya’s cheek. They’d just returned to the dance floor after doing shots. She’s forgotten all about Chelsea’s mistake.

“Hey! Selfie!” Bobby seemingly comes out of nowhere and stops beside Lexi, waiting for the picture. Bobby poses with his tongue out and Lexi snaps the photo. Priya has vanished to the other side of their circle to dance with Hope. “Do one for your insta story. You-know-who might see it,” Bobby suggests.

“Bobby, you’re a genius,” Lexi gasps, the alcohol once again affecting her.

Bobby takes the phone from Lexi’s hand, and moves his other arm so it’s around her shoulders. He’s about 5 inches taller than her, and his cheek rests against the top of her head. Partly due to intoxication, Lexi is unable to think of anything else aside from the way he holds her close to him, the feeling of his cheek on her forehead and his hand on her shoulder. He’s even very slightly rubbing his thumb up and down. He is finding it hard to ignore the smell of her hair right next to him, which smells very lightly floral, with a hint of coconut. And the way her hair tickles his face, and the slightly clammy sensation of his hand on her shoulder. He positions the phone in front of them, scrolling to the Instagram camera and smiling into it.

“Cheese!” He says, flashing his teeth and dimples. Lexi smiles with her teeth too, but she’s looking at Bobby in the camera instead of herself. Bobby snaps the pic with flash on, and moves away with Lexi’s phone so she can’t see what he’s doing. A moment later, with a cheeky grin he hands the phone back. Lexi looks at her story, the picture is nice, and includes Bobby’s arm resting on Lexi’s shoulder. He’s put some text on which reads ‘love this guy❤️ @bobbymckenzie’ and a sticker of someone dancing.

“I’m not even following you!” Lexi laughs at the tag. Bobby snatches the phone from her hands again and follows himself, then places it back in her grasp.

“Sorted,” he grins.

“Wow,” she snorts. “That sticker is really doing the work here.”

“Obviously. That’s why it’s there.”

She’s taking the piss, but she’s actually quite happy with the photo, and the chance that Lucas might see it and be even more annoyed appealed a lot to drunk Lexi. Sober Lexi might not be so impressed but, alas. Chelsea keeps making kissy faces at Lexi and Bobby, and not so slyly dancing into them so that they’re pushed further together.

“Sorry,” Lexi would mumble each time, her stomach contracting at the contact.

“You’re alright,” Bobby would grin, holding her steady so they don’t both end up falling into someone else. His hands are soft but solid and cup round her biceps. It’s all she can really feel with the weightlessness of her intoxication.

“She seems fun,” Bobby shouts, his dimples reflecting in the laser beam pointing at him.

“Oh yeah! I forgot to say, Chelsea’s the one I live with.”

Bobby grins, remembering the pinks and greys and motivational quotes of Lexi’s apartment, and goes over to Chelsea, lifting her arms up and dancing with her. She takes to this well and they look kind of adorable jumping from side to side. They’re both fun and happy-go-lucky, it makes a lot of sense that they’re enjoying each other’s company. Hannah is moving like a worm, her body winding from side to side and her hands on either side of her head like she’s trying to keep invisible headphones on. Hope is a good dancer, she looks relaxed and carefree, and Priya is doing a very sexy, feline movement that involves her ass, and her hands all over her body. Lexi smiles at her friends and thinks about how lucky she is to have them. She even thinks she might be kind of glad that Bobby was there tonight.

—-

“I’m not ready, I want to dance all night!” Chelsea sulks, which encourages Hannah to go into a very shaky rendition of ‘I Could Have Danced All Night’ from _My Fair Lady_. Lexi stands beside them all outside the club, waiting for a text from Lottie. But she doesn’t have to wait much longer, as Lottie swaggers out of the club with Gary in tow, smirking mischievously. 

“Hello, my girls.” 

“You’ve been gone all night!” Laughs Priya, watching the way Gary looks at Lottie.

“We’ve been having fun,” she smiles at Gary. “But I have to leave you now.”

“Lottie, you can go with him,” Lexi shrugs.

“Uh, no! I was promised a sleepover with my girls.” 

_“I could’ve spreeeeead my wings…”_

“Is Hannah okay?” Lottie asks.

“I think you’re just a lot more sober than the rest of us,” Hope laughs.

“Sorry I missed the night,” she frowns, “I honestly wasn’t expecting him to be here, and when he was we just got caught up in talking and… other things.”

“It’s okay babe! We’ve still got hours ahead of us,” says Chelsea.

“Tube or taxi? I think we’ll be alright on the tube you know,” Priya muses. No one seems to be on the verge of throwing up. They make their way to the station, everyone lagging except Chelsea, who’s skipping along, and Hannah, who’s still singing and dancing along with it.

—-

“I can’t fucking use my fingers,” Lexi laughs as she desperately tries to dig the right key out of her keychain. Lottie groans.

“You’re making me wish I went with Gary,” Lottie goads. Priya shoots her an unimpressed look.

“I’m joking!”

Lexi finally manages to unlock the door and the girls stumble into the flat. They all grab some water and get down to chatting about the night and random stuff. Lexi, Hope, and Lottie all squeeze into Lexi’s bed, while Chelsea, Priya, and Hannah share Chelsea’s. Before bed, Lexi checks to see who’s viewed her instagram story, and there near the bottom is “kohlucas”. She smiles to herself as she drifts off to sleep.

—-

Lexi is already clattering around the kitchen when Hope comes in, looking slightly disheveled.

“Morning!” She does her best cheery smile.

“Hey, sleep well?”

“Not exactly, but unknown punch will do that to you.” She shudders a little at the thought of the taste of alcohol, and takes a seat at the kitchen counter.

“Yeah it’s dangerous but it tastes so good,” Lexi laughs, still ever so slightly tipsy.

“Thank you, by the way. For you girls inviting me out, I had a really great time. I already met some of Noah’s boys so, it’s nice to meet the women in his life.”

“Noah’s a great guy. You seem perfect for each-other.”

She smiles warmly. “It’s early days but, I kind of feel like we might be.”

Lexi places a glass of water in front of Hope.  
“Lottie still out?” Lexi glances to her bedroom.

“Uh, yeah. She was snoring when I woke up so, I thought it best to get out of there.”

Lexi snorts. “Of course she was.”

“I don’t mean to pry but, Bobby seemed like a really nice guy. Are you seeing eachother?” Hope skims a long finger round the rim of the glass nonchalantly.

“Oh, Uh, no. He’s just a mate. Gary, the blonde one, is seeing Lottie,” Lexi tries to switch the focus round. Hope smiles, knowing she shouldn’t press any further. “Tea? Coffee? Food?” Lexi clatters in some cupboards.

“Some tea would be amazing, thank you. With one sugar if that’s alright. I’ll wait for the others to have food, I have a vague recollection of Chelsea saying we were ordering brunch.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s Chelsea for you. There’s a café down the road which does a full english in a styrofoam container, it’s cheap and perfect hangover food. They’ve got other things too, if a full English isn’t your jam.”

Hope makes a pained face. “That sounds so good right now.” 

Lexi checks the clock on the wall. “It’s almost 10:30, I think they’ll probably be up soon ish if you wanna come fetch the food with me?” Lexi offers, it would be nice to chat a bit more with Hope, anyway.

“Alright then!”

—-

As soon as the fresh air hits their faces Lexi and Hope start to feel a little better after their night.

“Nothing like a bit of fresh air to cure a hangover,” Hope laughs.

“At least no one threw up, that’s what I’m grateful for.”

“You’d hope everyone’s kind of past that stage by now.”

“You’d be surprised,” Lexi says as she remembers nursing Chelsea all night over the toilet just a few months ago.

They make their way down the open area outside the block of flats, beside the park into an opening which takes them to a road. On the road is a corner-shop, a café, a kebab takeaway, and a laundrette. 

“Here we are!” Lexi exclaims, pointing around the grubby looking café.

“Ah, London.” Hope grins affectionately at the typically British scene.

They go in and order 6 breakfasts to go, then head back to the flat. Once they’re back, Chelsea is sprawled on the sofa clutching at her head in an eerie mirror of the week before, Priya sits at the counter with a cup of coffee, and Hannah is gulping water like a fish next to her.

“Oh thank god,” Chelsea sighs as she sees the styrofoam in Lexi and Hope’s hands.

“Breakfast is served!” Hope enthuses, placing the containers down on the coffee table. Chelsea scrambles for one, and Priya clatters through the cutlery drawer for everyone.

Hannah is taking a very tentative bite of a spoonful of beans when Lottie emerges from Lexi’s bedroom.

“No one thought to wake me?”

“You would’ve shanked me,” responds Priya, earning a laugh from the other girls. 

Lottie nods and shrugs a shoulder. “Fair enough.” She joins the girls on the floor and snatches at the last breakfast. 

—-

Lexi’s phone dings after the girls have cleared up, and Hope, Lottie, and Hannah have gone home.

Bobby: how’s ur head?🤕😆

She thought back on the night, how she’d stopped in her tracks when she’d seen Bobby leaning on the bar casually, the way she’d felt with his body pressed to hers for the photo, and how he’d held her steady when people were bumping into them. Then she thought about how he’d disappeared. She hadn’t seen him when Gary had come out with Lottie at the end, or in the crowds of people spilling out of the club. There was a vague recollection of her seeing Elisa and Marisol walking off down the road, but not with Bobby. She wondered if maybe he’d gone home with someone. It was what she knew he so often did, anyway. But there was this weird bout of bitterness in her chest about it. She pulls up her Instagram and looks at her story again. Bobby’s smile is so warm and inviting, and she looks so happy to be with him. And they both look pretty drunk. She looks down the viewers again, and his name sticks out like it’s highlighted: ‘kohlucas’. She wonders what he thought when he saw the picture.

—-

Lucas was lying in bed, ready to call it a night after a long evening of meetings with his father and investors, when he decided to do a quick look on Instagram. Lottie had told him earlier in the week that she and Lexi were planning to go out on their night off, and he was interested to see if they’d posted about it. He sees ‘lexi.mitch’ has a story up, and hesitates to click on it. It opens up to Bobby McKenzie’s cheeky smiling face, and his arm around Lexi, who looks very smiley. Lucas grits his teeth, and spends the next few hours thinking about what they could be doing.


	10. Dead Girl Walking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Halloween is approaching, but Lottie and Lexi are stuck at work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Bear Claws - The Academic  
> Paper Planes - M.I.A.  
> Midnight City - M83

**Bobby** : how’s ur head?🤕😆  
_Seen 14:35pm_

 **Lexi** : still attached

 **Bobby** : i was a bit worried you’d been decapitated tbf

 **Lexi** : wow you’re so funny

 **Bobby** : only the best for my new bestie 😉

 **Lexi** : don’t i might throw up

 **Bobby** : that hungover, huh?

 **Lexi** : 🙄

—-

When work rolls around on Monday, Lexi has a nervous excitement about seeing Lucas. She feels like a teenage girl again. He stands at the bar, wiping it down with disinfectant when she sees him. He doesn’t look up to greet her.

“How was your weekend?” He asks in a slightly strained voice.

“Really fun. Been a while since I’ve had so much fun.”

So maybe she’s laying it on a bit thick, but it’s not exactly untrue.

It was odd. Lexi and Lucas had hardly spoken since The Event, but now he seemed to be set on talking to her, warning her off Bobby, apologising for that, and now small talk. A lot had changed in the time between, but it did feel like there had been a turning point for Lucas to start acting this way. He’d been keeping Lexi at arms length for far too long.

“Good to hear.” He looks up at her finally, and his face is stern. There’s a moment where Lexi melts into his dark eyes, ready to agree with anything that comes out of his mouth. They both jump at the sound of the front door squealing open. 

“Lucas, can we chat?” An older, but put-together man stands at the entrance of the bar. He has shiny black hair gelled back, with two stripes of grey just above his ears. He’s wearing a grey suit and horn-rimmed 60s style glasses. He quickly looks down at Lexi, before walking straight past her and sitting in a booth.

“Of course,” Lucas replies, signalling to Lexi to go to the staff room.

She knows nothing would ever go ahead with Lucas really, but it would still be nice if his dad didn’t just ignore her entire existence all the time.

—-

“Mr Koh does not look happy,” Lottie sighs as she strides into the staff room about ten minutes later.

“I wonder what happened.”

“Probably Lucas did something wrong again. I feel so bad for the guy; he does everything he can for this bar.”

Lexi just nods. Of course she respects Lucas’ work ethic, but she was still annoyed at him.

“They can’t take too long, we’ll open soon,” she sighs as she grabs an apron from her locker.

“I’d love to know what goes through Lucas’ head sometimes.”

Beom-seok was pretty much handing the business to Lucas, grooming him to be the owner. Lucas was a hard worker but this was a lot of pressure, and every decision he made was with the bar in mind. It was why he’d spent all this time ignoring Lexi, he couldn’t let things like feelings get in the way when he knew what his father would say about it. It wasn’t fair on her, he _knew_ that. But he didn’t know what else to do. He thought back on the way she smiled at him for the first time during her trial shift, her plump cheeks lifting up her glasses. She never wears those glasses anymore, he misses them. The way that simple smile slowed time down momentarily replayed in his head often, even more so recently, now that he realised things weren’t so safe.

He’d been trying to pretend there was nothing there: easier to do when there wasn’t a renowned player flirting with Lexi out in the open. Easier to do when Lexi spent most evenings stuffed in the store room where he didn’t have to look at her. Her soft brown hair curling round her ears, the way her grey eyes crinkled right up when she laughed, he’d ignored it all for the longest time. Everything that has happened was his fault, and the way he dealt with things was definitely his fault. What could he do though? He didn’t really have any right to be jealous after the way he acted, they weren’t together, and he had no right to her as a person anyway. He knew his jealously was unfair and unjustified, but he couldn’t help the surge of anger when he thought about Bobby McKenzie with her. He’d watched reluctantly as she laughed at his jokes, how he took her home, Lucas didn’t even dare to think what might’ve happened afterwards, how he’d come in the next night to get her number, and that stupid fucking picture on her Instagram stories.

Lucas wasn’t an idiot, he knew there must’ve been other men in her life, but something about Bobby McKenzie just made it all so much worse. Maybe it was the fact that Lucas thought it wasn’t Lexi that Bobby really liked, he just liked the chase and the catch. But there was nothing he could do. He couldn’t keep letting this distract him from his work.

—-

The next couple of weeks pass by quickly, the same old routine again and again. Hope has been added to the **Girls On Tour!** group chat, and notes one day that she will be having a Halloween party at her house. Hope is a CEO of a big toy company, so Lexi figures she owns some good money and quite a sizeable house. On a London budget, of course. Koh’s is doing a special Halloween themed happy hour, so Lottie and Lexi begrudgingly can’t go. At least they get to dress up for work, though. 

Lexi is wearing her white shirt, with the following in blue: a tartan tennis skirt, a loose blazer, knee high socks, a ribbon tied round the collar of her shirt, and a scrunchie which holds up the top half of her hair. On her face she’s made her eyes very dark and tired-looking, and has made her lips pale and chapped.

“Who are you?” Lottie asks as Lexi struts into the staff room mockingly. Lottie is in a fully witchy, sexy, black lacy get up.

“ _Dear Diary, my teen angst bullshit has a body count…_ ” quotes Lexi in a rather convincing American accent, hands on hips.

“I should’ve known you’d go obscure. Veronica Sawyer from _Heathers_ right? With a corpse-y twist? You couldn’t just be a normal zombie?” She laughs, but appreciates the effort made. 

“Winona Ryder is a treasure and I’ve been a cat for like, three years in a row. Plus, the west end show was insane and I wanted to take the theme of ‘Dead Girl Walking’ literally.”

“What about that time you were Velma from _Scooby Doo_?” Ponders Lottie.

“Well, that was a party, and I was able to rope Hannah into being my Daphne…”

“Oh yeah, she wanted to be Daisy Buchanan didn’t she. Not that I’m not sure that’s exactly what she’s wearing to Hope’s.”

“For the third year in a row,” grins Lexi. 

“Damn, I can’t believe we have to miss it.” 

“I know. It’s going to be such a good night and we’re stuck here serving cocktails to middle aged women in cat ears and men who don’t even bother to dress up,” complains Lottie, fiddling with the witch’s hat on her head. “According to my tarot though, we’re in for some kind of surprise tonight.”

“A surprise?”

“That’s all I know so far. Come on, let’s see what awaits us.”

Lucas is sitting on one of the bar stools typing away on his phone when Lexi and Lottie emerge from the store room. He’s got his hair spiked up and has dark makeup around his eyes, and fake blood coming from his mouth, he wears his usual uniform under a black and red cape.

“Oooh Lucas, bite me,” teases Lottie, pretending to fan herself.

“I wouldn’t want to end up hexed,” he laughs, eyes trained on Lexi. “Who are you?”

“Veronica Sawyer from _Heathers_ ,” Lottie answers for her, “god hasn’t anyone watched an 80s movie recently?”

Lexi laughs at the fact that Lottie herself had asked the exact same question moments before.

“Don’t you need a croquet bat?” Asks Lucas smoothly, eyes focused back down on his phone.

“If I were at a party, maybe, but I don’t want to accidentally knock a customer out.”

“Good answer,” he remains cool, but a very subtle lift gives way at his mouth.

“Stop reminding me what we’re missing out on, Lexi,” groans Lottie. Lexi shrugs.

“We close at 12 tonight, so if you’ve got somewhere to be…” Lucas trails off.

“12?! On Halloween?! Since when?” Lottie starts, pulling her best aghast face.

“Since my father teamed up with the club down the road for this Halloween event. We’ll be encouraging everyone to go there afterwards.”

Lottie gasps. She turns to Lexi. “We can get to Hope’s for at least a couple of hours!”

Lexi squees: “We can try! This must be your surprise.”

Lottie looks guiltily at Lucas, who’s still pretending to be absorbed in his phone. 

“Lucas, you should come,” she says offhandedly. Lexi feels her stomach tighten.

“I wasn’t invited,” smiles Lucas in a manner that screams ‘sensible’.

“Hope said we can have Plus Ones. I already invited Gary but… Lexi didn’t invite anyone.” She elbows Lexi in the waist. Lucas smiles at the idea that Lexi didn’t have anyone to invite. That she hadn’t invited Bobby Mckenzie. Lexi sighs under her breath.

“Yeah. You’re welcome to come with us.”

“Well, if it’s definitely okay then I might. It’s been a while since I’ve been to a party.” 

“And you’re already dressed up!” Enthuses Lottie. Lucas chuckles, getting up from the barstool to start the shift. “You do make a dashing Edward Cullen,” she teases.

“I didn’t really have a specific vampire in mind, but take it how you will.”

“He is so Edward,” whispers Lottie behind a hand to Lexi.

—-

The patrons of the bar this Halloween are just as Lottie described. They’re serving special spooky themed cocktails which have things like fake eyes and smoke coming out of them, and everyone is lapping it up. Thankfully, Lottie and Lexi are being paid double tonight for the holiday, and they milk every hour for what it’s worth. On their break they receive texts from the girls featuring cute selfies and unintelligible drunk texts.

“I feel like all I’ve done these past few weeks is work and get drunk,” chuckles Lexi. According to the texts Chelsea - who is dressed as a cat in a black bodysuit and lacy black ears - has been talking Noah’s ear off about her work for the last half hour. In the picture Priya has sent, Hope sits somewhat sulkily next to Noah, locking an arm in his in attempt to change the conversation. It seems to be busy and lively, and definitely spooky.

Once their shift is over and the bar is clean, Lexi, Lottie, and Lucas prepare to leave.

“I assume you have an Oyster card, Lucas?” Asks Lottie. He flushes slightly pink.

“I usually get by on my bike. There’s no queues that way.”

“You… ride a bike to work?”

He sighs. “My _motorbike_.”

“Of course you do,” she sighs, too. “There won’t be room for us two on there, will there?”

Lexi blushes at the thought of sitting behind Lucas on his bike, arms round his waist and bodies flush. She did always like how he looked in that leather jacket, and motorbikes were hot anyway.

“Why don’t we get a taxi? What’s the address?” Suggests Lucas.

“Here,” Lottie goes to show him the address on her phone.

“That’s not too far. It won’t be too expensive, I’ll pay the fare anyway,” he shrugs. This weird, hospitable Lucas wasn’t something Lexi had seen in a very long time.

“I won’t complain about that,” smirks Lottie.

“Lucas you don’t have to do that, we don’t mind,” says Lexi. Lottie gives her a pointed look. “ _I_ don’t mind,” Lexi corrects herself. “I can pay my third of a taxi fare.”

“No, I insist. You invited me to this thing so it’s my treat.” 

It felt a little clunky, taking Lucas to a party. She was sure outside of work he liked to go out and drink and dance, but it was still difficult to imagine that after the way he acts at work.

—-

They walk up to the house. Lexi was right, it’s a healthy size for a property practically in central London, and it’s decorated well with Halloween themed items. Cobwebs drape over the windowsills and the door, and plastic pumpkins sit on the doorstep. Lexi, Lottie, and Lucas stand in front of the door, silently not deciding who will go first. But then, the door is opened for them. 

Standing there, in a very short red american-style cheerleader outfit, is Bobby McKenzie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Optional_ : Dead Girl Walking - Heathers: The Musical


	11. Heads Will Roll

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes the pressure of a drinking game can make people do something they regret.
> 
> But they’re too old for Never Have I Ever, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Thriller - Michael Jackson  
> Heads Will Roll (A-Trak Remix) - Yeah Yeah Yeahs, A-Trak

Lucas visibly stiffens beside Lottie. He had hoped to actually be able to spend some time with Lexi tonight, it was most of the reason he’d even come, but something told him Bobby would get in the way of that. He actually thought it a shame, because he knew if things were different he and Bobby would be really good mates, but Lucas couldn’t help rely on his jealously; the jealousy he felt that Bobby was able to come to the bar and smooth talk women, something Lucas couldn’t do anymore because of his responsibilities, and even more so the jealousy he felt that it was Lexi Bobby had made a move on. It was also anger that Lexi was okay with someone so careless showing an interest in her, someone who treated life like a game. Someone so _unlike_ Lucas. 

“Well, fancy seeing you guys here!” Grins Bobby. He looks happy and confident, hands on hips showing off his outfit. It’s short and tight, highlighting his lean shoulders sticking out from the sleeves. If he were to turn around, Lexi’s pretty convinced he’d be flashing more than his thighs at them. Overall, it’s very Bobby. Behind him the house looks packed, dim lights with colours flashing, and more decoration like on the outside of the house.

“What are you doing here?” Asks Lexi, surprised to see him.

“Hope invited me! We became good mates at the club a couple weeks ago,” he explains with a proud look on his face. Lexi didn’t remember that part of the night, but that might be the alcohol’s fault. 

Bobby seems surprised at Lucas’ presence, only ever having seen him disapproving Bobby from afar. Perhaps wrongly Bobby had assumed Lucas wasn’t the party sort, but he’d find out tonight.

“Well, come in then!” He ushers them inside. Lucas gives Bobby a pointed nod, which Bobby returns. They make their way into the kitchen where there’s a table full of drinks, and Noah and Hope sit by. 

“Hey!” Hope says, jumping to her feet to hug everyone. She is dressed as Sandy from Grease (sans horrendous wig), the cool one, and Noah appears to be Danny.

“This is Lucas…my uh, my plus one,” Lexi introduces him, causing Hope to look him up and down and stifle a grin. There was no denying he was incredibly attractive. Bobby shoots Lexi a sly wink at the term ‘plus one’. She didn’t _really_ want to introduce him as a manager in a party setting. Anyway, the term made it feel like maybe things weren’t so terrible between them after all, even if it was only for the night.

“I didn’t know you guys were coming!” Grins Hope. “Nice to meet you Lucas.”

Lottie places a hand on Lucas’ shoulder, “We had a little change of plans. Now, I need a drink.” She moves to the table to pour herself a drink. Lexi and Lucas also collect drinks, Lucas looking a little awkward and out of place, but trying to make conversation with everyone. Noah gets up to greet them all, clearly quite drunk by this point.

“We haven’t got long, I’m going to go and find Gary and drag him over here.” Lottie struts into the garden with a cup in her hand.

“I think Chelsea’s in my bedroom trying to play some games,” Hope sighs. “It’s just Priya and Hannah humouring her and some guy i don’t know who’s trying to get on Priya. She’s literally been going round the whole party asking people to play with her but no one will.” Hope scans her eyes round the party. “A lot of these guys are people from work and friends I grew up with.” She looks a little unimpressed at the thought.

“It’ll be nice to get to know some new people,” Lexi smiles, trying to calm Hope’s visible slight agitation at being responsible for the party.

“I’m really glad you guys managed to come though, gives this joint a bit of variety,” she looks happier now, squeezing Lexi’s arm fondly.

“There’s quite a lot of people,” Noah agrees.

“Well, I don’t mind playing a game with Chelsea so, I’ll go find her,” Lexi says, putting together a drink to take with her. She pauses, thinks about Chelsea’s games, and then says: “Maybe after a few drinks, though.”

“I love games!” Agrees a tipsy Bobby. “What about you, big guy?” He turns to Lucas.

“Why not,” he shrugs. Lucas isn’t entirely sure he likes being referred to as ‘big guy’, but the last thing he wanted was to make a fuss over something so small. Especially with Lexi standing so close he could touch her if he so wished.

They stand round the table for a while sipping their drinks, Lucas taking quite well to Noah, them discussing something quite intently. Hope engages Bobby and Lexi in a conversation about the night so far, laughing about how one of her colleagues had all their skeleton makeup come off in the apple bobbing bowl.

Lexi is happy to finally be able to be doing something normal with Lucas. She feels hopeful about the future, maybe he actually didn’t hate her as much as it seemed he did to her. She remembers the argument they’d had at work, and then again at the hospital, and how it felt like that was the first time they’d properly spoken. Since, _that_ , at least. She thinks about work since Sarah’s accident and catching glances at him across the bar. But what she doesn’t know, is that Lucas would catch glances at her, too, when she wasn’t looking. Lexi was also grateful that she was here in a friendly setting, more relaxed and easy. 

“Hey!” Says Hope, “let’s dance for a bit!”

Bobby jumps at the opportunity and bounds after Hope into the living room. Lexi follows soon after, a slow moving Noah and Lucas bringing up the rear. Halloween-y music plays as they dance together: Hope sticking with Lexi, Bobby dancing circles around them in crazy, odd movements, and Noah and Lucas gently bobbing on the spot, still engrossed in conversation. There are quite a few other people milling about in the living area, dancing, chatting, and generally basking in the buzz of a Halloween party.

“I think we’re all nicely buzzed,” hums Hope a little while later as she watches her friends slowly lose their inhibitions. “Let’s go find Chelsea.” 

Lexi cheers, Bobby claps, and Noah silently follows them all up the stairs into Hope’s bedroom.

“Dare!” Chelsea yells excitedly as they enter the room. Sure enough, it’s just Chelsea, Priya, Hannah, and an interesting looking guy with blue hair. The guy’s wearing a superman outfit. Hannah is, as they predicted, wearing a flapper style outfit which is probably meant to be Daisy Buchanan from _The Great Gatsby_ , and Priya is a sexy nurse. The best part about their group was how different they all were.

“Oh my god! You guys made it!?” Chelsea looks to Lexi and jumps up to hug her. She has to readjust her cat ears on her head as she breaks away. There’s a gentle Malibu scent emitting from her. “Lottie’s here too?!” She looks around, trying to see her.

“Yeah, she’s coming back with Gary in a bit. I’m sure someone will tell her we’re upstairs,” Lexi smiles.

“Hi! I’m Chelsea!” Chelsea goes to hug Lucas.

“Hi!” He’s taken aback, but not annoyed. “Lucas. I work with Lexi.”

 _Hm_. It’s only a small thing, but Lexi’s a little miffed that to Lucas she’s ‘someone he works with’, but to her Lucas is a ‘plus one’.

“Oh!” Chelsea puts a hand over her mouth and goes slightly red. In the background, Priya looks surprised. Most of his Instagram photos she’d stalked didn’t have his face in, or if they did they were very old, or the back of his head. He looks _much_ better in person. Chelsea feels the same, and is very shocked to see just how good looking he is up close. Is a guy even allowed to look that good? 

Everyone says their hellos, and Hope, Noah, Lucas, Bobby, and Lexi squeeze into the circle.

“We should wait for Gary and Lottie, and then we can play a game!”

“As long as it’s a drinking game - I’m in,” says Priya.

“Hey,” Bobby whispers to Lexi from beside her. He’s having to sit at an angle to avoid flashing his underwear from his cheerleading outfit, so his body is fairly close to hers. “Things seem to be going well tonight?”

“I guess,” she shrugs, “I didn’t actually invite him, Lottie did.”

“I’ll be honest, the more times I meet the guy the less sure I am why you’re interested, he seems intense. Then again, I guess you’re pretty intense,” he tries to chuckle quietly.

Lexi shoots him a look. “Of course _you_ wouldn’t understand.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Just then, Lottie and Gary burst in the room, looking a little worse for wear. Chelsea jumps up again to greet them, and they join the circle. Gary is dressed in some raggedy clothes and green face paint. A zombie, or Frankenstein’s monster, maybe.

“A werewolf told me I could find you up here.”

“On any other night you’d sound insane saying that,” Gary laughs, looking to Lottie fondly.

“Nah, it would be pretty normal Lottie,” smiles Priya.

“Took you long enough,” sniggers Lexi, knowing exactly what they’d been doing by the slightly purple stain around Gary’s mouth.

“Let’s get this over with, then,” sighs Lottie.

“I don’t know, could be a fun way to get to know people’s secrets,” Bobby grins, looking round the circle exaggeratedly.

“Never have I ever!” Shouts Chelsea. A couple of people groan, but most agree. It’s just a bit of harmless fun, anyway. “You start, Felix.” Chelsea nudges the blue haired boy next to her.

“Never have I ever… shagged a milf,” he looks stupidly impressed with himself, but no one can quite work out why.

Priya rolls her eyes dramatically. No one drinks. 

“Don’t think that ones quite what we’re going for, mate,” Bobby says gently. Felix looks a little downtrodden.

“Never have I ever… taken uppers,” suggests Priya. Felix, Lucas, and Lottie drink. Everyone looks to Lucas who blushes at all the attention. 

“Posh boy strikes again,” cackles Lottie. “You are so hard to read.”

Lexi isn’t surprised, she knew Lucas had a bit of a wild streak at uni, and as Lottie says, he was a typical posh boy in many ways.

Noah is next: “Never have I ever become a viral meme,” he smiles to himself, impressed.

“Babe, you have to say something you _haven’t_ done,” Hope nudges him. Noah doesn’t seem to care much though, and he’s the only one who drinks. The girls had already heard this story, Noah was quite proud of himself for his reading at reading festival mixup.

“Aw, man, you were a meme?” Pipes up Felix.

“Yeah, so a couple of years ago-“

“Babe,” Hope stops him. “Maybe later.”

Noah nods.

“Alright,” Hope racks her brains, “game’s off to a bit of a rocky start. Never have I ever been arrested.”

Felix drinks, but Lexi thinks he must be putting it on to try and impress Priya. The lad seems a little eccentric. Gary’s turn is some weird sex thing which no one drinks to. Lottie’s is a very specific pointed one aimed at something Hannah had done one time, which causes her to go beetroot red and everyone to badger her for details.

Lucas says: “Never have I ever been on a date with someone who didn’t speak English,” he looks downtrodden as he remembers the time, not recalling Hope’s reminder of the rules before. _God, this game is a shambles. Maybe we’re too old for this_. Weirdly, Bobby also drinks, and everyone laughs at the weird shared scenario of the two boys.

Lexi giggles her way through a “never have I ever tried to steal someone’s cat” which is very pointedly aimed at Chelsea for the time she took home a cat she found on the street. 

“It looked so lonely!” She protests.

“It was wearing a collar with its name on!”

Bobby’s next: “Never have I ever sucked a toe,” he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. 

“Ew,” says Lottie. No one drinks.

“Toe boy strikes again,” laughs Gary. It must be an inside joke of theirs.

“Okay…” Hannah takes a moment to think. “Never have I ever… got a tattoo,” she blushes. To no ones surprise Lottie drinks, Gary drinks, Lexi drinks, and everyone again looks over to Lucas as he drinks.

“Since when?! No offence, but you don’t seem the type,” says Lottie, intrigued.

“Oooh tell us tell us!” Encourages Chelsea.

“It’s a, uh, motorbike, on my bicep,” Lucas awkwardly explains.

Lexi remembers his voice in her head from a time ago: _“It was stupid. I got it on my first lads holiday just before uni. I don’t actually mind the idea of having a motorbike tattoo, but I wish I’d thought it through a bit more.”_

_“It’s kinda hot…”_

“We’re learning a lot about you today,” Lottie grins, intrigue in her eyes, breaking Lexi out of her momentary daze.

“I wanna know more about Lexi’s tattoo!” Protests Bobby, poking her gently in her arm.

“It’s not somewhere you’re ever going to see,” she teases. Bobby makes an ‘oooh’ face. 

Lucas watches them intently. They seem very friendly. Bobby sees Lucas watching and remembers the deal.

“What if I’ve already seen it?” He winks. She laughs outwardly.

“I’ve seen it!” Beams Chelsea. “Anyway it’s my go!” She looks round the room, and is struck by an idea she finds highly amusing upon seeing Lexi and Bobby sat beside each-other, squabbling silently about the tattoo. She probably wouldn’t have done it sober, but drunk, Chelsea felt a little mischievous.

“Never have I ever, slept with someone in this room!” She says proudly, making a face at Priya, who rolls her eyes affectionately. Lexi knows Chelsea is asking because of their miscommunication about Bobby, which she hadn’t yet had a chance to set right, but she still feels nervous. Lexi hesitantly drinks. She’s not sure why she feels compelled to do so. She could just _lie_. But she’s waved and it just happens. All eyes turn to her and there are a couple of ooh’s, everyone assuming it was when Bobby had taken her home that first night. Chelsea beams proudly, keeping her eyes trained on her roommate, not even thinking to watch Bobby too. 

No one dreamed it could be Lucas. 

She is overshadowed anyway by the fact that Gary and Lottie tentatively take a sip, and everyone is so caught up in knowing what happened there and fuelled by alcohol, that they don’t notice that Bobby doesn’t drink, and Lucas does – also drunk and feeling the pressure. That is, except for Bobby. His face takes on a steely look as he watches Lucas sip his beer, and it all clicks into place in his head.

Lexi and Lucas had slept together.


	12. The Event

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We go back in time to The Event which changed everything...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: please note the **mature** rating for this😊
> 
> Chapter Playlist:  
> my strange addiction - Billie Eilish  
> Angel of Small Death & The Codeine Scene - Hozier  
> Beggin For Thread - BANKS

_“Good work today, Lexi. My father seemed impressed,” Lucas grinned as he shoved the last of the £20 notes into a plain white envelope. “You can get going now, by the way. Shame I’m not exempt from cleaning up just because I’m his son,” he chuckled in a friendly manner._

_“Thanks!” Lexi grinned back confidently, aware she’d absolutely smashed her trial shift. She was cocky maybe, spending all evening sweet-talking the customers, bantering with Lucas, and making stellar cocktails. “I’m happy to help you clean up, it shouldn’t take too long with two of us,” she suggested, wanting to seem as willing for the job as possible. It was going to fund her Masters after all._

_Lucas flashed his straight white teeth in a very attractive smile. “I’ll make sure you get the job,” he winked. He would’ve protested, but he was looking forward to spending more time with her._

_Lexi raised an eyebrow as if to say:_ you better. _They’d got on very well over the course of the day, managing to find lots to chat about in spare moments._

_The two of them got to work disinfecting the floor and the counters, running a final dishwasher round, and placing glasses where they were kept. After about 45 minutes, they were completely done._

_“Sweet!” Lexi exclaimed, coming out from the storeroom where she’d put away the cleaning equipment. Lucas lifted a hand to high five her, and she happily brought her hand up to hit his. He was definitely a cool manager._

_“Couldn’t have done it without your help. Seriously, thanks a lot.”_

_“It’s no problem.” And she meant it. Obviously, work was important to her, but helping out Lucas also felt important too, now._

_“Getting to know you today was good,” he smiled with a hint of... sheepishness? Lexi was surprised that this contradicted the confident man she’d seen all day. He flicked his eyes to the fridge next to him. “What do you say we have a few drinks? On me, of course.”_

_Lexi was worried. She didn’t want to get too drunk and make a bad impression on her boss’ son, but he *was* the one suggesting it, and she could control herself. Or at least, she convinced herself she could. “Alright then.”_

_Lucas pulled out from the shelf a nice looking bottle of red wine, and two clean wine glasses they’d just put away._

_“We’ll have to clean those again, then,” she laughed. He chuckled, and poured them both a glass. They were stood behind the bar, opposite one another, Lucas leaning on the counter at the back where the drinks and glasses were kept, and Lexi leaned on the bar itself. Their legs crossed over next to each-other._

_“Cheers.” Lucas lifted the glass up, his veiny hands holding it very delicately. Lexi lifted her glass to meet his with a gentle clink._

_“To us. Getting all this-“ she gestured around the bar, “cleaned up efficiently and well.”_

_“Obviously I still need to talk to my dad, he has the final say after all, but if it were up to me you’d definitely get the job.” He took a sip confidently. “You’re a very hard-worker.”_

_Suddenly, her cheeks felt very hot, the wine reaching them. She should have probably slowed down at that point. But she didn’t._

_“Another?” Lucas asked after they’d finished their first glass._

_“Thank you,” Lexi said as she held her glass out for him to fill. Lucas finished off the bottle by filling both their glasses._

_“I should think one bottle will be enough for tonight, though,” he grinned as he moved to place the empty bottle in the glass bin. “Staying professional, and all that.”_

_Lexi nodded. She was already feeling a little looser and freer, and she didn’t want to risk this job. He came back to perch opposite her again, sipping at his wine._

_“To be honest, this is my first time with this much responsibility. I probably shouldn’t be telling you that, sorry.” He caught himself saying a little too much and started to blush slightly._

_“To responsibility,” Lexi lifted her glass up for another toast, earning a clink from Lucas’ glass._

_“You didn’t have to stay, you know. It really was very nice of you to help me clean.”_

_“It’s okay, I like to help people. I swear I wasn’t trying to get a leg up on the job,” she laughed. He smiled, biting his lip slightly as he saw something indescribable in the woman before him. They finished off the last of their wine, and placed the dirty glasses on the counter behind Lucas._

_“I can get these, you should go home, I really shouldn’t keep you the whole night,” he smiled. But she took a glass, and washed it out quickly at the sink, then grabbed the other and washed it too, placing them both upside down on the drying rack._

_“Sorted already!”_

_“Thanks. Again. You’ve saved my ass a lot tonight.”_

_Before she could even think about what she was saying, Lexi blurted out: “I guess that means you owe me.”_

_She was staring deeply into his rich dark eyes, silently begging him to leave so that her desires couldn’t get the better of her._ This is so inappropriate, _she thought, but the light buzz from the wine meant she didn’t care. Lucas could feel it too. He looked searchingly into her wide grey eyes, waiting for her to go, but she didn’t._

_Slowly but surely, Lucas edged toward Lexi. She, nervous, fell back slightly into the bar._

_His face was inches from hers, eyes flitting down to Lexi’s lips which were parted in anticipation. She swallowed loudly, squeezing herself even further back into the bar. This was what she wanted, and right now the consequences didn’t mean shit to her. All day she’d been trying to ignore her blatant attraction to Lucas because he was her boss’ son, but here he was right in front of her. And he’d laughed at her jokes, he’d helped her out probably more than he should’ve, he’d shared a bottle of wine with her, and here he stood just seconds away from caving into what she’d been craving all day._

_Lexi’s right hand rested back on the bar behind her, where Lucas’ lay inches away, threatening to be placed atop her own. Lucas’ right hand rested on her left shoulder, slowly slipping down until it reached her hand, and lightly brushing his fingers over hers. First, he ran his index finger slowly round the curvature of her thumb, then ran light circles in her palm with his thumb. His fingers ghosted in a mirror over hers, hesitant to entwine, all the while his eyes directly on hers, aside from glances to her lips. His tongue poked out to moisten his lips. The anticipation was palpable._

_“I should go,” he almost choked out, but didn’t move a muscle. He needed a sign from her. A sign that she wanted to make this mistake just as much as he did. Her eyes flicked down to his lips. There it was. Shit._

_“Yeah,” Lexi nodded slowly, lightly pressing her middle finger to Lucas’. They stayed there for what felt like an eternity, locked in each others gaze and the electricity of their bodies being oh-so-close to touching. They were both breathing heavily, chests rising and falling noticeably. Lexi’s nose angled up towards Lucas’, their faces now close enough that it was difficult to see each other, because their eyes were so near the other’s face._

_“But fuck it, I really don’t want to,” he growled, and immediately smashed his lips to hers. His left hand swiftly moved to her waist, and right hand cupped her cheek and he moved his lips roughly against hers. She responded in the same way, aching to feel every part of his kiss possible. If she was going to hell, she might as well take all she could. Lexi’s left hand rushed up to pull at Lucas’ hair, and her right hand gripped the counter behind her. God, he was a good kisser. The taste of his lips and tongue was utterly intoxicating, she felt drunker from him than the wine. She pushed down the part of her yelling ‘NO!’, because everything else was screaming ‘yes!’ Again and again._

_And then he was pulling her up onto the bar, hands beneath her thighs, massaging them with fervour. She gasped against his lips._

_“Are you okay? Is this okay?” He asked breathlessly, breaking away for a moment. Lexi nodded, gripping a hand into his tight fitting white shirt and pulling him back to her._

_He completely enveloped her. Their lips moved against each other like they were full of the oxygen needed to keep them alive. Their hands explored each other ravenously and they pressed their bodies so tight together they could feel everything. Lexi’s hands trembled as she moved down to unbutton his shirt, and Lucas moved one hand up her thigh to grip her waist beneath her skirt. Slipping his shirt off his shoulders, she roamed her hands over his now bare chest, tight muscles contracting as their lips continued to move in harmony._

_“Fuck, you’re hot.” She laughed as she broke away for a moment of breath. He laughed back darkly. Then he rested his head on hers, hands still pulling her waist flush to him._

_“I’ve been wanting to do this all day,” he whispered, unable to speak properly, moving to ghost his hands over the band of her underwear._

_She bit her lip. “Okay, then what’s stopping you?”_

_—-_

_“Hey,” Lexi smirked as she entered the bar a couple of days later to see Lucas sitting in a booth. She’d received a text to meet him there. He looked just as hot as she remembered, sharp angles of his face highlighting his dark eyes and his dark hair gelled neatly on top of his head. He was wearing a black button up, which hugged his muscular chest, and black slacks held up by a black belt. She recognised it as the same black belt from before. Her cheeks became hot as she sat down opposite him in the booth. She couldn’t help but think about his hands all over her the other night, each spot he had touched felt warm and tingly, ghosting the memories of that moment. They’d stayed up all night talking and getting to know one another inside-out both physically and emotionally._

_“Hi. You okay to start today?” He was cold. She could almost feel a shiver down her spine. He wasn’t even looking at her, just reading something on his phone. It was a complete 180 from how he’d been moaning her name just a couple of nights before. Hell, it was completely different to how he was even before that. Maybe he just wasn’t a morning person._

_Well, sleeping with her boss’ son might not have been the smartest move ever, but he was a willing participant too. She suddenly felt embarrassed. So embarrassed that she’d let herself be so intimate with this man, and embarrassed that she’d thought he was different from any other one night stand. Because he wasn’t, and she was going to have to see his face every day, knowing that the way she’d felt about him so soon, was just a quick fuck to him._

_Lucas had to forget the other night. He had to dim the flame Lexi had ignited in him. This was his responsibility now, he had to run the show round here and he couldn’t do that while he was dreaming about the girl with the soft brown hair and grey eyes, whose lips addressed his with a fresh confidence and unadulterated passion. He couldn’t bear to look at her, because he knew he wouldn’t be able to keep his distance. And he absolutely should never have started this. This whole situation was his fault, and he was struggling to figure out where to go from here._

_“Unfortunately my father felt you weren’t suited to the bartender role. But we have a back house spot he thinks you’ll fit into nicely, if that works for you.” He knew how bad this looked. He knew it looked like he was using the fact they’d slept together to treat her unfairly, but his hands were tied at the mercy of his father, who didn’t listen to a word Lucas said about Lexi’s work ethic. Who’d taken one look at her CV and put her in the other pile. The last thing Lucas wanted to do was treat her unfairly, even if he did have to keep her at arms length from now on. His lapse in judgment the other night would be something he’d regret for a very long time. He’d regret that it had even happened in the first place, that he’d initiated and encouraged it, but even more so, he’d regret that that was all he could get of Lexi Mitchell._


	13. Back To Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby and Lexi discuss the big reveal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Reflections - The Neighbourhood  
> Voodoo Child - Jimi Hendrix  
> Cheap Queen - King Princess

Lexi’s head spins as it all comes crashing back to her. Suddenly she feels very, very sick. The feeling of Lucas’ chill that morning, and many mornings since is a depressing reminder that he doesn’t care. She’s fooling herself to think that he came to this party for her. It was silly, she knows just how silly it was that she’d slept with the guy once and now couldn’t get him off her mind, but that was just the truth. She’d had other one night stands and left it at that, so why did Lucas stick to her brain like chewing gum? His voice humming her name like a song on a loop around her ears and once again the sensation of every place he’d touched, lightly and with profanity alike vibrating like they were being studied in an x-ray. The room is hot and the alcohol starts to burn her cheeks, and she’s embarrassed again. Mortified at the way she’d opened up to him both physically and emotionally.

“When did you have sex!!” Chelsea screams at Lottie and Gary, breaking Lexi from her thought.

“Well we have been talking for like… three weeks.”

“I only asked it to make fun of Lexi and Bobby! I wasn’t expecting two juicy affairs!” She squeals. “Oh! I didn’t mean to- oh no… I’ve done it again…” Chelsea hangs her head. Unfortunately for her, alcohol made her say a lot of things she would desperately try not to say sober, particularly when it concerned her friends she cared so deeply for. It was honestly part of the reason Lexi hadn’t told her about Lucas. Even with her best intentions, Chelsea just struggled to have a filter sometimes. 

Lucas’ head snaps round to look at Bobby. He hadn’t been looking to see if he’d drunk, so preoccupied in his own head and the instant regret when his alcohol drunk for him, he wasn’t even looking at anyone else. Luckily enough no one had seen him drink, and he was basking in the relief of that until Chelsea dropped that bomb.

“It’s alright, lass,” Bobby puts a comforting hand on Chelsea’s shoulder, who looks distraught. 

Had it happened? Did Lexi actually sleep with Bobby that first night? It was the confirmation Lucas had been dreading since he saw them leave together almost two weeks ago. She had slept with Lucas on the first night, after all, it wouldn’t be unheard of. But Lucas always thought it was because of something deeper. Sure, it was absolutely because of raw sexual attraction and a little bit of wine, but he had definitely felt something… more. Like he was safe with her, as they stood by the bar catching their breath and talked about their dreams and their fears. She had asked about his tattoo, running her soft fingers over it, and truly listened when he told her, even though the story wasn’t all that interesting. And every bone in his body at that point had wanted to ask her to come back to his, maybe to do more of _that_ , but also just to be with her, because it felt good.

Being with Lexi on that first day was like the moon coming up to act as an anchor for the darkness of the night. She glowed, but it wasn’t obnoxious like the sun. It wasn’t sweet and bright either, it wasn’t like she was the kind of girl who lit up every room she was in, it was like she grounded every room she was in. She was real and playful and a bit sarcastic, but deep down her intentions were so good. Being the centre of attention wasn’t always her thing, but she would listen, help someone out when they were trying for the spotlight and no one was paying attention. She wasn’t modest, she was damn proud of herself, her conviction and poise saying she didn’t need the other stars in the sky to light the way for her, she wanted them. And yeah, he’s romanticising a bit. Or a lot. But he really hadn’t felt so connected to a person so quickly maybe ever. He really wasn’t stupid enough to think she thought of him as more than a shag, she’d spent the past year cordially saying hello through Lottie, and trying not to make eye contact when she was near. But that didn’t stop him from holding on to that little flint of hope, the one night he could remember until he got his shit together and moved on from her.

“I thought it would be funny…” Chelsea sniffs, prickles of tears threatening the corners of her eyes and her bottom lip upturned. The drunk crying is about to begin.“I’m so sorry, Lexi and Bobby I wasn’t trying to make things uncomfortable…”

“Don’t worry.” Lexi’s mind is elsewhere, at this point, she didn’t really care if the whole world thought she slept with Bobby McKenzie. Especially not if it meant her best friend was going to beat herself up over it.

“I think that’s the end of that game,” sighs Hope.

“Come on babe, lets get you some water and maybe some bread,” Priya gets up to lift Chelsea by her limp hands, and leads her out of Hope’s bedroom. “Lexi, I’ll text and let you know if we have to go home.”

“Yeah, I’ll come help in a minute,” she bites her lip, mind racing with how quickly things had turned sour, when really, nothing had changed. Lucas sipped the drink, right? So was he embarrassed of her or not? To say Lucas had always given her mixed signals would be lying, because he had consistently since that day after The Event, been pleasant but cold, and never crossed the line of asking too much about her personal life or even talking to her at all when unnecessary. That was, until the Bobby fiasco. But even then, it was nothing to do with her, she thinks, just to do with his dislike of Bobby McKenzie.

“Aye, lass,” Bobby’s waving a hand in front of her face.

“What? Sorry, I’m a little wavey.” 

“Yeah, no shit.”

She looks around the room and everyone is gone, except Bobby standing before her and waving his hand in her face. She stands.

“So. You… did the deed?” He says, enunciating the alliterative letters, hands on hips. 

“Huh?”

“You slept with him. That’s why this is a whole thing.”

“Well, yeah but, I don’t like him because I slept with him.” She can feel heat rushing to her cheeks again. Her sex life is actually the last thing she wants to discuss with Bobby McKenzie.

“Sex changes everything,” he says dramatically.

“It wasn’t a big deal,” she shrugs, not meeting his eyes. “I don’t really see why it matters.”

“How long have you liked him?”

“About a year…”

“And when did you sleep with him?”

She grits her teeth. “About a year ago. But it’s not why. It’s just…”

He’s waiting for her to go on.

“Well it happened the day we met.”

“You like him because he was a good shag.” 

“No I don’t! I like him for other reasons and I don’t really want to discuss this with you,” she defends.

“I’m trying to help!” He chuckles exhaustedly.

“You sleep with people all the time and I assume you don’t have feelings for every person, otherwise you’d be in love with god knows how many women.”

“We’re making assumptions aren’t we?”

“Well it’s a fair assumption to make, isn’t it? You don’t fall in love every time you shag someone!”

He moves towards her. “Maybe we should try it and find out,” he smirks. He’s grinning mischievously, hands still on hips, and his eyes flick down to her lips and back, before he raises his eyebrows playfully.

“You’re insufferable.”

“You barely know me!” He laughs, throwing his head back exaggeratedly.

“Exactly! That’s my whole fucking point here! You don’t know me well enough to have any say in who I like and why I like them! It is what it is.”

“Look, I was just messing around a bit. Like I said, you should loosen up a little.” His comment reminds her of him standing in her kitchen, a mere three weeks before. _“I think you take things too seriously.”_ He had said, smirking that signature smirk and looking at her intently. Except this time there’s something different in his eyes, and she can’t quite place it. 

“Yeah, and like I said, you’re too loose.”

“Looser than a goose?”

“ _Looser than a goose_??” She mocks in a shoddy Scottish accent.

“Ho!” He laughs, “Your accent needs some work. But it’s okay, you’ll get the hang of it once I teach you how to have fun.”

She exhales through her nose.

“I was having fun until you tried to psychoanalyse my relationships.”

He sucks breath through his teeth. “Barely a relationship though, is it?”

She wants to hit him, to have some snarky comment, but she can’t help but laugh. He’s right, and it’s funny. And something about him really did just make her laugh.

“This is a ridiculous conversation,” she shakes her head with the laugh.

“On the plus side, even if you won’t agree to testing your own sex-and-love theory with me, everyone already thinks we had sex anyway!” He brings his arms out and grins like he’s celebrating.

She chortles. “I honestly don’t really care.”

“No, but someone else does, I can tell.”

The truth is, Bobby had been utterly taken aback by seeing Lucas drink in the game, and he wasn’t quite sure why. He’d really just thought this was some silly little puppy crush with no foundations, and that it would be quite a fun game to play around with. Now he needed to know the story, because it just got a lot more complicated. Why does he feel… somewhat betrayed? It’s not like he was owed the information at all. He still couldn’t really figure out what to make of Lexi. She seemed a bit all over the place in her actions and the way she spoke, especially the way she spoke to him. But Bobby was a man of conviction, and he’d said he’d help her, so he would. And at this point he was determined to make her less tightly wound and smash down some walls.

Lexi doesn’t realise until a moment later that despite the fact they were talking about him, Bobby had taken her mind off Lucas for a second. Just enough that she was less stressed about him and more focused on being annoyed at Bobby. And laughing at him, even if she hates to admit it. 

“Well, we should probably get back to the party.” Bobby moves towards the door, and is just about to open it when he starts suddenly, and jumps backwards into Hope’s bed, skirt flying, revealing some very tight shorts.

“Quick!” He pulls Lexi onto the bed with him so his arm is under her neck, and her body very slightly leans over him.

“What?! What are we doing?” She whispers, her face now inches from his.

“Pretending,” he grins, flashing his teeth. Lexi is trying to ignore the proximity of Bobby’s face to her own, his grin and those dimples and those sparkling eyes.

Just then, the door swings open to reveal Lucas. His eyes fall on Lexi and Bobby, positioned on the bed like they’d just been making out. She flings her head to the door and quickly scrambles off of Bobby to look at Lucas, her eyes wide and unsure what to say. Lucas stands there uncomfortably, looking between the two of them with an unreadable expression.

“Chelsea’s going home,” he says coldly. There it was again. It hadn’t taken long for Lucas to drop back into his usual distance, but all the same Lexi felt a pang from the change. Maybe this whole jealously thing wasn’t doing what she wanted at all. Maybe it was only pushing him further away than he already was – and that already was like him standing at the end of a tape measure all rolled out. He looks between them once more, jaw tight, and walks back out from the doorway, slamming it behind him.

“Ha! I knew it,” Bobby grins triumphantly.

“How the fuck did you know he was coming.”

“It was a lucky guess, but I heard someone coming up the stairs. There was nothing to lose.”

Bobby sits up so he’s next to Lexi, legs hanging off the end of the bed.

“I guess I should commend you for your quick thinking.”

He shrugs. “I’m good at what I do.”

“You pretend to make out with people a lot?”

“Depends how long we keep this up,” he raises an eyebrow spiritedly.

“This doesn’t change the fact that we still barely know each other, and I still don’t like you,” she gives him her best withering look.

“I know something, though,” he smirks, leaning his face towards hers to bore into her eyes. She’s not expecting it, but she doesn’t back down. “I know you like this. This pretending; it’s exciting, and like you’re rebelling against him, you get to have a little walk on the wild side and you can pretend it’s you for a bit. This whole taboo relationship-with-your-boss thing gave you a taste of that, but now you have me, prepared to lie and scheme, to show you how to let loose, to make you feel wanted. Even if it’s only a show.”

She can’t respond, because she knows he is completely right.

“I think we can carry this on. If you’re up for it. Playboy Bobby McKenzie tainting his lovely little Lexi. It’s really, really fun,” he smiles darkly, something more than mischief in his eyes.

“Well, if you think you can handle it.”


	14. I Fake Rocked Your World

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby and Lexi come down from the night’s events.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter isn’t very action packed, but I hope you like it all the same!
> 
> Chapter Playlist:  
> Trouble - Cage The Elephant  
> I Forget Where We Were - Ben Howard  
> Only You - Yazoo

Lexi and Bobby emerge back downstairs to a much less populated house.

“I never did say, I like the Veronica Sawyer,” Bobby smirks at Lexi, motioning up and down her costume as they look around for some friends. She’s taken aback. It just didn’t feel like Bobby could be a normal person who likes normal things. He’s too… _Bobby_?

“You know _Heathers_?”

“I watch a lot of films. Particularly 80’s films. And Winona Ryder is really hot.”

She rolls her eyes but is pleasantly surprised by this revelation. 

“My favourite movie is from the 80’s,” she smiles mysteriously, making small talk while they meander around the apparently endless house. Where the hell was everyone?

“Pretty in pink? No, don’t answer that. I don’t think that’s it.”

She shakes her head. So, he watches a lot of 80s movies. He recognised instantly who she was dressed as. She’d be lying if she didn’t admit she was impressed. 

And that improvised moment? It was… interesting. Putting it lightly.

As he had yanked her onto the bed with him she felt an odd twist in her stomach. Then their faces had been so close, and he’d been smiling up at her. She remembered the detail of his features, she had never been that close to study them before. There was a light film of sweat on his forehead from being in a house with lots of other people and drinking; his eyebrows were so neat that Lexi wondered if they were natural or plucked. His face was sculpted, with a strong jawline and contoured cheekbones, and a handsome dimpled chin. His plump lips disappeared slightly because they had been pulled up into a light grin, calling those cute little dimples to the surface; they were subtle, but refreshing. Light golden eyes had looked at her, screaming trouble. Soft freckles sprinkled over his round nose and under his eyes, and over his forehead like they were kissing his warm brown skin. It was obvious to her how he had his way with women. She was glad to have been able to look at him so closely, it felt like she knew more about him already.

They sit down on a sofa so Lexi can text someone. She pulls out her phone to see a missed call from Priya, and a text letting her know they’d gone home.

 **Priya** : Have had to take Chelsea home, lots of crying 😢 Lottie said she’d wait for you, but call me when she starts heading to hers so you’re not walking alone x  
**Priya** : Or I’m sure Bobby wouldn’t mind 😉 we have lots to talk about there!  
**Priya** : Just stay safe and keep me updated. If you have to call a cab I’ll pay for you.

She opens up another text stream and texts both Lottie and Hope the same message. 

**Lexi** : where are u guys? been all round the house

Lexi unintentionally sighs a little too loud.

“We need to find Lottie.”

“Yeah, I was gonna go home with Gaz, too. Something’s telling me she’ll be going home with him though,” he sniggers.

“I should be thanking them for having shagged, really,” Lexi says as she thinks about how all eyes in the circle turned to Lottie and Gary during Never Have I Ever. Bobby bursts out laughing really loudly.

“You actually should, they saved your ass.” 

“I reckon that’s the last time I’ll see Lucas anywhere near to relaxed in a long time, though,” she sighs.

“He really not have much fun?”

“He’s just a workaholic. The business is his dad’s and,” she rolls her eyes, “it’s all he does.”

“Another reason I don’t understand why you like the guy.”

Lexi just shoots him a look. After a long pause he speaks again. 

“So does this make me like, your fake boyfriend?”

“Don’t be silly, you don’t start a relationship with someone three weeks after meeting them. Or at least, I wouldn’t.”

“Fake fuck buddy?”

“You wish you could fake fuck me. More like fake dating. Fake seeing each other.”

“We already did fake fuck. But okay, I can work with that. Been a while since I’ve dated anyone but it’s like riding a bike, right?”

“I honestly don’t know. I don’t date much. And I can’t actually ride a bike.”

He side-eyes her. “Right, you don’t take guys home until you’re better ‘acquainted’ with them, but you don’t date?” He echoes her words from the other week in her flat.

She nods once, resting bitch face doing the work for her. She wasn’t really in the mood to discuss her love life anymore tonight, especially not with her new fake beau.

“Hold on, you can’t ride a bike?”

“I’m Dyspraxic. And my parents gave up teaching me after I fell off like, a thousand times.” 

Bobby thinks how this is the first real bit of information about herself she’d told him. Earlier she’d told him she liked 80s movies, and now he was learning that she couldn’t ride a bike because her parents never taught her. Maybe it was the alcohol helping her open up, but he was definitely being kept on his toes.

“You’re an interesting girl, Lexi Mitchell.”

So, she likes books, he remembers her copy of _The Beautiful and The Damned_ on her bedside table. And she likes cult 80s movies. She’s dyspraxic. And her parents maybe weren’t huge parts of her life from the flippancy of her comment. Bobby thinks about what else she might like, her family dynamics, and more random facts. He knew more now, but was also more confused.

He looks around the room, a couple of drunkards milling about: a few dancing in a lacklustre manner, and a few crouched over passed out. He and Lexi seem to be the only coherent people within a 20 metre radius. 

Some orange and black bunting is slipping off of the place where it’s blu-tacked to the ceiling, a cup lays side down on the table where it’s contents spill out every so often. The floor is unpleasantly sticky and covered in glitter and confetti. 

From the corner of his eye he sees Lexi reach up to twist the earring at the top of her left ear. She’s looking directly at him. He turns so he’s facing her. They look at each other for a little too long until Bobby starts to feel uncomfortable. He looks away, but Lexi doesn’t budge. _Why does she do that?_

“Where the hell is Hope?” She groans, checking her phone again. She’d sent the text a while ago now.

“Are you tired?” Bobby asks.

“It’s been a weird night. It’s hard to believe I was at work like three hours ago. And then the whole game debacle. I kinda just wanna go home,” she leans back into the sofa, shutting her eyes gently. “My buzz is wearing off.”

“I don’t know about that, you’re certainly talkative tonight.”

In answer, Lexi stays frozen against the sofa, eyes still shut. Spoke too soon.

He sighs dramatically. “I’ll walk you, then.”

She opens one eye to look at him.  
“What do you mean?”

“I’ll walk you home. Consider it fake not-boyfriend duties.”

She’s too tired to argue, and too tired to try and pretend she isn’t grateful.

“Thank you.”

“It’s no problem.”

“You can’t keep doing this though, people will get ideas.”

“Isn’t that the point? Besides, it’s no skin off my back. I’d have no one to play with if you got abducted on your way home.”

“I hate that that’s not even a joke.”

“Tell me about it.”

—-

“So you’re dyspraxic and can’t ride a bike. Is that your villain origin story?” Bobby says as they stroll through the cool night air. The breeze has woken Lexi up a little.

“If you’re not careful I’ll find a way to activate my powers on you,” she looks at him sternly, but is clearly messing about.

“What you gonna do, fall off a bike at me?” He guffaws.

“I’ll throw the bloody bike at you.”

“But you’ll probably miss!” 

That damn hand-eye coordination.

Lexi’s phone finally pings. _Typical_.

 **Lottie** : sorry babe, had to deal with hope having a little breakdown (host duties innit), i’m in the upstairs bathroom

 **Lexi** : shit i’ve just left with bobby. omw back will meet u there

 **Lottie** : oh don’t worry, this way I can go home with gary 😏 have fun with bobby 😉

She decides not to reply to that for her own good. They walk a while in the cool air. 

“Shit.” Lexi grimaces.

“What?”

“There aren’t any night tubes running from here to mine.”

Bobby seems to think for a moment. “I’ll call Marisol.” He says.

“You can’t do that! It’s nearly half three in the morning she’s bound to be asleep.”

“It’s Halloween, remember? Or, well, the morning after Halloween.”

“Won’t she have been out?”

“She only drinks occasionally. She already told me earlier she wasn’t planning to drink tonight so she could make sure Elisa got about safely.”

“I’d feel really bad, Bobby. I can just call a taxi. We can pay for it up to the tube stop and I can walk the rest to save money.”

For some reason it’s weird to Bobby that Lexi refers to him by his name here. It feels more intimate than it was probably intended.

“It’s up to you. She owes me a favour anyway,” he shrugs.

“I’ll call a taxi. She can get to bed and keep nice and warm.”

“If you insist.”

“You don’t need to take me if I’ll be in the taxi either.”

“We actually live close enough that we might as well share a taxi.”

“But Marisol had to pick you up from mine the other week?”

“Yeah it’s like, a 15 minute walk maybe. It’s doable but not ideal when Marisol has already offered her services.”

Lexi scrunches her face up. “Fine. We’ll split a taxi.

They take the taxi back to the corner by the park in front of Lexi’s flat block. They thank the driver and pay him, splitting the money equally, before clambering out.

Then, a little Basset Hound bounds up through the park to where Lexi and Bobby have just got out from their taxi.

“Oh my goodness! Hello, my lovely! Aren’t you a pretty one, yes, you are so pretty!” Lexi coos as she leans down to pet the dogs cheek. Bobby scruffs it’s head a little.

He watches her demeanour alter entirely in the face of a small pudgy dog. It hadn’t seemed before like something very Lexi, but now that it’s happening he can see it perfectly. It’s kinda cute.

“Where did you come from?” He asks, looking round for an owner. Then a man emerges through the park holding a lead, shouting ‘Jerry!’

The dog hears it’s name and saunters back over to his owner.

“Alright,” the owner nods as he passes them.

Once the man is out of sight Bobby whispers to Lexi: “Funny time to be walking your dog int’ it?”

“Maybe he’s drunk too,” she giggles, checking her phone to see its 03:57am.

“He’s gotta get ahead of the Sunday morning rush,” Bobby jokes.

“Yeah, everyone walks their dog super early on a Sunday morning. Well known fact.”

“Pfft. Or he’s nocturnal.”

“Maybe they’re going somewhere far away.”

“I think we need to talk about how it’s called _Jerry_.” Bobby sputters.

“It’s cute! At least it’s not called Bobby.”

“Oi!” He shoves her lightly, no real pressure behind it, “I really didn’t peg you as the dog type, you seem more of a cat person,” Bobby ponders. They continue to walk across the park to Lexi’s block.

“And, how do you class a cat person?”

“A little more…brusque? Sharp, quick-witted.”

She hums a laugh. “Well, maybe so. But can’t I like both? I’ll never understand why people try to pit cats and dogs against each other when they’re both gorgeous little fluffy balls who just want to be loved in their own way.”

He laughs at her ridiculous phrase, and the dopey face she makes as she says it. She’s definitely still tipsy.

 _Something tells me that’s a bit like you_ , Bobby thinks.

They walk up the stairs until they’re once again standing just outside Lexi’s front door.

“Hey, this feels familiar,” Bobby smiles, looking at his surroundings. He pulls out his phone and makes a face.

“No way. Don’t tell me-“ 

“GOTCHA!” He starts laughing maniacally.

“I was about to batter you,” she threatens. He chuckles. Lexi unlocks her door, assuming Bobby would probably insist she go inside before he leaves.

“Well, it’s been a pleasure as always. Sleep tight, don’t let the bed bugs bite,” he salutes as he begins to walk backwards back down the hall.

“Yeah. See you ‘round Bobby.”


	15. Mind The Gap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions build between Lucas and Lexi after things were acknowledged at the Halloween party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SURPRISE!! Happy 3-month-aversary to WOYL! To celebrate you get an extra upload!
> 
> Chapter Playlist:  
> Weirder In Here - Deptford Goth  
> To The Wonder - Aqualung, Kina Grannis  
> Take Me To Church - Hozier

The early days of November pass by in a haze, it’s getting colder but everything else is the same. Halloween decorations slowly disappear and almost instantly everywhere is ready for Christmas. Lexi likes Christmas, but feels it’s a little much to start the festivities from the first of November. 

For the first couple of Fridays, Bobby comes by the bar with Gary, and then walks Lexi home while Gary and Lottie leave together. Lucas has gone back to not saying much, just the occasional harsh look. According to Hope, he’d left her house straight after seeing Bobby in bed with Lexi. Not that Hope had known that of course.

Things feel different between Lucas and Lexi but in practice they’re exactly the same, and it sucks. Lexi is wondering if the whole Bobby thing is a waste of time. It’s not made Lucas do anything, and she feels like it’s confirmed the fact that there is no situation in which Lucas would have feelings for her. The Event was a fluke. He just wanted to get laid and she was there and willing. She keeps reminding herself and keeps feeling so ridiculously stupid. And stupid for thinking some idiotic jealously move would have an effect on him. That night at the bar, during their pillow talk Lucas had mentioned his jealousy.

_“It’s a really bad habit. Every girl I’ve been with I’ve gotten so jealous over other men, or women. I’ve been trying to sort it out but, I haven’t actually been interested in any women for a while anyway. Maybe that’s my karma,” he chuckled lightly, playing with a lock of Lexi’s hair._

But she supposes you can’t get jealous over a girl you don’t care for. Even just remembering that conversation, how close and affectionate they’d been, sends a pang of hurt through her stomach. _Why did I have to get hooked on a one night stand? I feel so pathetic. Why did that one night stand have to be my Boss’ son? On the day I was trying to get hired!_

Lexi’s friends seem to have forgotten all about her crush on Lucas, focusing their attention on teasing her about Bobby. It was a relief in a way, using Bobby as a scapegoat. And _everyone_ likes him. Lottie knew his reputation but still liked him, whether or not that had anything to do with him being Gary’s best friend however was another matter. He seemed to have somehow befriended Hope on the down-low, and now he and Noah were thick as thieves too. Chelsea and Priya kept making comments about how cute he was, Priya making sure to point out that even if he’s just a passing bit of fun, she thinks Lexi needs it. Priya says, multiple times, it’s exactly what she would be doing. In fact, Lexi thinks their approval comes from a place of freedom and nonchalance, and that if they were to fake define the relationship, her friends would quickly change their tune. 

Because everyone knows Bobby isn’t really boyfriend material, he doesn’t like to be tied down to one girl. And Lexi knows for a fact that he’s been seeing other girls while they were fake dating. It didn’t bother her, after all she wasn’t actually interested in pursuing anything with him. She felt a little bad about using Bobby, but he actually seemed to be enjoying himself and whenever she told him: _you can back out anytime_ he’d just smile and say _I’ll let you know when I get bored._

Bobby is weirdly bothered by the idea of Lexi and Lucas sleeping together. It keeps coming back to him in a random unsolicited thought. Something to do with the fact he just hadn’t expected it, and something to do with the fact he keeps overestimating how well he knows the girl. Each time Bobby visits Koh’s he is reminded of just how attractive Lucas is. He could have any girl he wanted, but he doesn’t seem to pay attention to all the customers who flirt with him. Bobby only catches him stealing the occasional glance at Lexi. The idiot needs to make a move, or someone else will. But he tries not to dwell on it. After all, he’s only doing her a favour.

Lucas is still struggling with his internal war. He knows he needs to forget about it, carry on with his work as his father had been so adamant when he’d visited not so long ago. _You don’t seem like you’re paying attention, Lucas_ he’d say, _You’re my only son and I need you to handle this. I won’t be in the business much longer._ But he just can’t help the surge of jealously and hurt every time he sees Lexi with Bobby. He keeps thinking about walking in on them at Hope’s party, and how every time he frequented the bar these days, he takes her home instead of a random hook up. He isn’t sure what’s worse: whether Bobby is still sleeping with other girls while he’s seeing Lexi, or if he’s stopped because of her. He doesn’t know, and he’s hesitant to whether or not he wants to know. Whatever it was, it was causing Lucas more pain than he was ever going to let on. _Got to stay focused._

On the third Monday of November, it’s a quiet and uneventful night. Lexi is back in the store room, as the Monday bartenders are out there working. She’s grateful to have a break from being in the throng of it all, especially if it means not having to be around Lucas. They’d argued, they’d gone to a party together, and then? Back to nothing. Back to basically pretending the other doesn’t exist except as a minor colleague. It hurt, but she was used to it by now, and she had to keep trying to stay sane. 

She spends the night filling the dishwasher and replenishing stock as she is so used to doing. On occasion Lottie pops in to get something and they share some back-and-forth. On their break Lottie talks about her date with Gary at the weekend, and how much she really is starting to like the guy. He’d taken her to a crane site with a picnic, and they’d sat and watched the stars. It was a little unconventional, but Lottie seemed more than happy with the date. It was romantic in Gary’s own little way. Lexi is happy for her, she deserves to have a good guy like Gary caring for her and treating her as she should be treated. 

As soon as she knows it, it’s closing time, and after cleaning Lexi plods back to the staff room to get ready to leave.

“See you tomorrow, babe!” Lottie calls out as she skips out of the door. Gary is picking her up. Lexi unfastens her apron and folds it neatly into her locker along with her hairnet. When she gets home she’s going straight to sleep, she thinks, everything has been so exhausting recently. Just working in proximity with Lucas was completely draining, because the whole time she was focused on him. Looking at his smile, his friendly manner with the customers, the way his arm muscles jumped when he was mixing a cocktail, and how she had to skirt around him awkwardly while trying to ignore him. She grabs her coat and bag, closes her locker, and puts them on. The staff room door then squeaks open. 

“Hi,” Lucas clears his throat as he comes to get ready to leave. It’s the first time they’ve really spoken since Hope’s party, and even that wasn’t much. Lexi turns to face him slightly reluctantly, worried about what he might say. “I thought you and Lottie had gone.” He looks a little uncomfortable, his hands resting gently on his hips, and his face avoiding eye contact. He’s holding his apron scrunched up in one hand.

“I’m heading out now,” Lexi answers. There’s an uncomfortable moment where neither of them know what to say next.

“No Bobby tonight?” He kicks himself almost as soon as he says it. _Why?! Why did he have to bring it up?! Could they have a single conversation these days without talking about fucking Bobby McKenzie?!_

“Uh, no. Not tonight. Just me,” she smiles awkwardly and pats down her hair so her hands are doing something.

“Just you,” he repeats, feeling the words in his mouth. 

“Just me,” she says once again with a little laugh. She looks like she can’t decide whether to just leave, or wait to see what Lucas does. She wants to ask him what his plans are, how he’s feeling, but she doesn’t. Her brain stops her from saying anything further for fear of being embarrassed once again, and also because she doesn’t really know what to say. It was hard to believe that the day they’d met they had an abundance of topics to talk about, but now they just didn’t have any words. Lucas was only making small talk, right? He hadn’t actually wanted to bump into Lexi here, that’s why he’d said he thought she’d already left. He was just being polite. Sort-of. 

He does it without thinking. One minute he’s by the door, and the next he’s right in front of Lexi, causing her to step back and hit the staff lockers behind her. She cringes at the loud noise which rings out across the staff room. She was too jumpy. Without a word, he looks into her eyes, and slowly moves his face so their foreheads are almost touching. Neither of them speak, and all that is heard is the sound of their heavy breaths. Lucas seems to be trying to keep his hands to his sides, and he’s trying to not give in the the temptation to move his face just that little bit closer…

Lexi notices Lucas’ hesitation, and very slowly starts to move her lips towards his, as if millimetre by millimetre. She shuts her eyes, scared but excited for what might happen next. Her hands stay flat against the wall behind her. God, what is she doing? This will only cause more regret and pain; yet she can’t help but feel like it’ll be worth it. It’s been too long since she’s been this close to Lucas, since she’s felt her heart beat faster and faster until it feels like she’s buzzing all over.

Internally, Lucas is freaking out. He wants to kiss her so bad but so many things are telling him not to. He might not like Bobby, but kissing someone else’s girl wasn’t something he was okay with, no matter who it was. Even if it was Lexi, and she’d been _his_ first, and he’d been unable to think about any other girl for the past year. Even if that were the case, he wouldn’t do that to Bobby. Plus, there was the everlasting argument of needing to focus on his job, and Lexi was definitely a distraction. That being said, he hadn’t touched her and rarely spoken to her since that September night last year, and she’d still driven him crazy every moment since. So she was a distraction either way. And Lucas is absolutely at war about which option was better. 

It’s like the fact that the whole thing had been brought to light at the party had also brought it to the forefront of their minds – and this? This first interaction since, it’s bursting and suffocating.

He sees her standing in front of him, leaning forward, lips slightly parted, wobbling slightly with worry and anticipation. He shuts his eyes too. Both can feel the others hot breath on their faces, too afraid to bridge the gap. Their foreheads are lightly touching, too afraid to come too close together. Hands still refraining from touching the other over fear of crossing that line. Each is asking themselves if they’re really going to do this, if they’re really going to cross that line, _again_? When it worked out so famously the first time? But they’re both here. And despite the closeness and the nervousness of their breathing neither one can work out if the other wants this as much as they do. It feels like such a long time that they stand there, hands by their sides, eyes shut, and foreheads brushing against each other. And then, someone moves.


	16. The Dam Breaks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucas and Lexi talk about what happened. Bobby takes Lexi on a ‘date’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Fury - Muse  
> Honey Whiskey - Nothing But Thieves  
> Put Your Records On - Corinne Bailey Rae

With a scrunching of his face and a balling of his fists, Lucas steps away from Lexi. She feels the heat disappear from in front of her. She can’t bear to open her eyes to see his face, but she has to. He’s standing an arms length away, his face attempting to show no emotion, but there’s the tell of his slightly crinkled brow which Lexi knows by this point. She purses her lips. _What the hell do I say now? Oh, haha, we nearly kissed, and then didn’t! How funny is that! Ugh. I have nothing to lose, I’m going to say how I feel. This was the last straw._

“What was that?” She says cooly, crossing her arms over her chest. She’s beginning to feel very hot in her coat, but she _had_ been expecting to leave after all.

“I mean, it was, well…” he blushes. 

“Were you going to kiss me?” She asks bluntly, doing that thing where she makes unbreakable eye contact.

“No, I-“ he squirms.

“It’s not like we’ve never done that before,” she pushes. She’s sick of this ridiculous game. “In fact, we’ve done much more than that.”

“Lexi, please let’s not.”

“Not what? Talk about how we fucked and ever since you’ve been treating me like some chewing gum at the bottom of your shoe?” She asks in a level, dry voice. She doesn’t know where this confidence is coming from, but she isn’t complaining. She _needs_ this. The awkward visor she usually wears around Lucas has slipped away. “Talk about how you just tried to kiss me and then didn’t for some reason?”

“Lexi, I really can’t do this,” he sighs.

“Can’t what? Actually tell me what the fuck you’re thinking like a grown adult? Like the 27 year old man you are? I admit, I’ve not said much either but that’s because of the way you pushed me aside after it happened. You made me feel so, so worthless. And you’ve just gone and done it again,” she laughs, but there’s no humour in her voice, “WHY can’t you at least talk to me about this?”

“BECAUSE YOU WORK FOR ME!” He yells, jaw twitching and finger pointed at Lexi’s chest. She’s taken aback by his sudden outburst, but quickly gets back to the topic.

“You’re not my boss, Lucas!” she yells back, squaring her shoulders to make up for the height difference, and moving closer to him.

“No, but my dad is.”

“And? Is he here? Because I don’t fucking see him. I don’t know why you have such a problem with this when you’re the one who started it.” Her eyes are wide with fury and her jaw is set. After all this time, she is finally letting it all out. Lucas inhales and looks towards the ceiling.

“That’s not fair.”

“What?! Of course it is! I’m not saying I didn’t play my part, but you were the one who made the decision first. You were the one with the upper hand, the one who started all of this. And YOU’RE the one who’s made it impossible to work here.” She pokes him in the chest with her last sentence. She didn’t really mean to say it had been _impossible_ , but it had just slipped out, and going back on it would just water down her argument.

“I didn’t- I’m-“ his face falls. “I’m so sorry. I never thought of it like that.”

“ _You’re_ the one who just now backed me up against those lockers with every intention of doing something but you didn’t. Of course you thought of it like that.”

“I didn’t! I had no idea you found it so difficult to work here because of me.” He looks upset. He never wanted to make things difficult for her, but he was too focused in his own way of dealing with things.

She scoffs. “There’s no way you didn’t know what you were doing to me. I’m a big girl. I could’ve handled rejection. If you’d told me that it was a one night thing and that’s all? Ok, I could’ve dealt with that. But what you did? Just refusing to acknowledge it and freezing me out completely because of something YOU started?”

“I couldn’t tell you that. I _can’t_ tell you that.” He is once again avoiding eye contact with her as he furrows his brow, trying to desperately to keep it together.

“Well why not?” Protests Lexi, barely even blinking as she gives him a steely glare. She needs answers from him.

He hesitates, as though he might say something...

And then: “You should go home, Lexi.”

“Wow.” And it all just disintegrates again. She’s right back to bloody square one, where he ignores her and makes her feel utterly rubbish. He can’t even answer her simple questions? He’s had long enough to make his mind up yet all he’s doing is avoiding the conversation and trying to send her away. But she has no idea where to go from here. If he’s going to shut her down and ignore anything to do with what she’s saying, then she doesn’t really have a choice. 

She needs to wind down anyway, watch some films with Chelsea and try and forget all about tonight. This back and forth is so, so exhausting. She shoots him one last withering stare before shouldering past him and out the door.

“Lexi…” he sighs, staring at the spot she was stood but seconds ago. He understands why she’s angry, but he just couldn’t say it. He knows saying it is something he can never take back, and it will open up so many more doors of confusion and distraction. So he lets her go. He kicks himself hard as he hears the door slam, and her leave with so many things still left unsaid.

—-

On Saturday Morning, a few days after the almost-kiss and Lexi’s outburst, there’s a loud knock at her door while she’s eating breakfast. She thinks maybe it’s Priya, asking to borrow some sugar or something. But it isn’t. She opens the door to see Bobby standing there, wearing black jeans and a plain white t shirt under his black bomber jacket, and a black beanie on his head. He smirks at her, leaning against the doorway.

“Hey.” He looks her up and down, a curious eyebrow raised. _Why is he looking at me like that?_

“What are you doing here? At-“ she checks the clock on the wall, “10:15am.”

“No hello? I’m here to see you, obviously.” He mocks.

“But why?” She doesn’t understand why Bobby has suddenly turned up at her flat when she’d only seen him the evening before when he walked her home.

“We’re going on a date.”

She pauses for a second. “What’s the point in a fake date?”

“Practice for the real thing. You said you don’t date much so, I’m taking it upon myself to once again help you out,” he places a hand to his heart and nods soberly.

“Wow, you’re so selfless,” she mocks. “But I’m still in my pyjamas.” She suddenly realises upon saying it that she’s in her pyjamas which are… kinda revealing. They’re silky yellow shorts and a lacy/silky yellow bralette. She’s stood in the doorway pretty exposed, this is embarrassing. _That’s_ why he was looking at her like that. She instinctively wraps her hands around her stomach and clears her throat to try and take the attention off of her bed wear.

“Well you can come like that if you want, no complaints from me,” he winks, “but you’d probably rather get changed.”

“You’re so annoying.” She walks away from the door, hoping none of her backside is on show. “Well? Come in then.”

“Why thank you lassie.” He mocks a curtesy before entering and closing the door behind him.

“I didn’t exactly have another option did I? Other than leave you stood in the hall,” she replies.

“Eh, I don’t mind,” he shrugs before plopping himself on the sofa.

“Lucky for you I shower at night so it takes me about five minutes to get ready,” she says back to him as she shuts herself in her room. Her breakfast sits forgotten and unfinished on the kitchen counter.

“I’ll believe it when I see it.”

She’s right, it only takes her about five minutes to get ready. She washes her face, moisturises, brushes her teeth, and decides to put her glasses on, in case she needs to look at anything closely. Then she gets changed and makes sure her bag has all she might need: Vaseline (she likes the cocoa butter one), tissues, water bottle, a snack, a pen, and a scrunchie. You never know what situation you’ll be faced with.

“You know, normal people would text first,” Lexi argues as she steps back into the main room. She’s wearing a green and grey striped jumper under baggy denim dungarees, and black converse on her feet. Draped over her arm is a waxy brown jacket.

“You’d make an excuse not to come if I texted first,” he says.

She shrugs a shoulder in agreement. He looks over her outfit, seemingly surprised. He’d only ever seen her in her work uniform, nightclub wear, or her Halloween costume, so it was interesting to see the kind of clothes she actually picked to wear for herself on a standard day. And Bobby hadn’t pegged these as an option, they were casual and carefree, two things he didn’t think of when it came to Lexi. The glasses too were an interesting addition, she clearly needed them to see rather than as a style choice, but he’d never seen her wear them at work.

“What’s with the glasses?” He asks.

“They help me see?” She says in a way which sounds awfully like ‘duh’. Bobby is quickly realising that her patience is thin today.

“Then why is this the first time I’ve seen you wear them?” He prods, but very lightheartedly.

“They get all hot and steamy when I wear them to work and it’s embarrassing. So I stick to contacts.”

“I like them,” he says nonchalantly.

“So do I,” she says impatiently, clearly not willing to take his compliments. She knows he’s just a massive flirt and to not take anything he says all that seriously. She walks over to Chelsea’s bedroom door and knocks once before shouting: “off out, see ya later Chels!”

There’s a muffled sound from the other side, and Lexi makes her way to the front door. Bobby follows behind, chuckling to himself. Once they’re out in the cold air, Lexi puts on her jacket. 

“You have to truly feel the effect of the coat?” Bobby laughs as he echoes his own statement from the first night they walked home together.

“Let’s see if you’re right about this. You haven’t actually told me where we’re going though, all I know is ‘fake date’.”

“Well I’m not gonna tell you just yet, it’ll ruin the surprise. Just make sure to put lots on your social media.”

She pulls out her phone and snaps a quick picture of Bobby outside her block of flats, hands in his jacket as he smiles at the camera. He looks happy and carefree and… kinda cute?

“There you go.”

He just smiles triumphantly and starts to walk down the path.

“So you know that thing you said that first night? About how you wouldn’t abduct me because of all the witnesses? What about now?” She calls out as she catches up to him.

“Well I suppose there aren’t any witnesses. Maybe I am trying to kidnap you!” He teases.  
She gasps rather unenthusiastically and hovers a hand over her mouth lazily.

“I guess this is it for me then.”

“Except you did just put a picture of me online. Lots of witnesses there,” Bobby rationalises. 

“I live another day. Well, depending on what I have to do on this ‘date’.”

“So when you say you don’t date much, how often is that?”

“I’ve been set up a few times by friends, and actually opted to go out with like, three guys,” she shrugs.

“Is that because you’re a serial monogamist or something?” He didn’t really picture her as one, though.

“Nope. I’ve never been in a relationship. Not properly anyway.”

He stops in his tracks. “You’re joking right?”

“No.”

Lexi has made it a healthy 23 years without a boyfriend, but it doesn’t bother her. She isn’t a settler, and the fact that no one had really been someone she was ready for a relationship with just meant she wasn’t going to get into one. She thought it a waste of her time to be with someone for the sake of it, for the idea of having someone to love. Or pretend to love.

Bobby is surprised by this revelation, Lexi is attractive, and he found her very interesting. It seemed odd to him that no one had wanted to be with her, _ever_. He himself had had a couple of short term girlfriends over the years, but nothing serious since he’d decided the casual hookup life was more his style for this moment in time.

They jump on the tube and travel the line to the station, the one Lexi always uses for work.

“We’re not going to work are we? Mine _or_ yours,” she asks, knowing the hospital was but a short distance away from Koh’s. He grins and taps his nose conspiratorially. They walk down the route leading to Koh’s and Lexi is very confused.

Finally, they step up to a cosy looking café down a small side street. It’s sign is made out of wood, and the windows are steamed up from the warm bodies and warm drinks inside. She knows this place well.

“First stop: Wilderness Coffee.”


	17. Coffee Prince

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi and Bobby grab coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Toothpaste Kisses - The Maccabees  
> Bloom - The Paper Kites  
> Somewhere Only We Know - Keane

“Alright mate?” Bobby grins as he pulls a man into a hug. He is tall and pale, with long blonde hair pulled into a topknot. Lexi has seen him here many times when she visits for takeaways, and he’s always very friendly and chatty. He’s attractive and definitely gives off a Nordic vibe. _Of course all Bobby’s friends are hot; Gary, Marisol, Elisa, this dude._

“Brother!” The man exclaims, patting Bobby on the back enthusiastically.

“This is Henrik, he owns the place,” Bobby says to her as he breaks away from the hug, “Henrik, this is Lexi.”

“Hi,” she smiles with a small wave, but Henrik is already pulling her into a bear hug. 

“Any friend of Bobby’s is a friend of mine!” His hug is warm and inviting, he smells like pine and bergamot. Bobby chuckles. Henrik pulls away from the hug and smiles at her. 

“Oh- were not frien-“

Bobby slaps a hand around Lexi’s shoulder to shut her up. She scowls at him.

“Well, you guys, the special today is festive hot chocolate,” his voice shows hints of a Swedish accent. Henrik grins as he steps behind the counter. There’s no line so Lexi and Bobby step up to order.

“I’ll have that,” Lexi says. Henrik grins and nods.

“Bob?” He asks.

“Yeah, go on then. Festive hot chocolate.”

Henrik busies himself with the milk frother, which gives the whole place a noisy, cosy feel.

“I can’t believe we’re drinking something festive in November,” Lexi shakes her head.

“I mean, we’re only like a week away from December. Don’t tell me, you’re a bit of a Scrooge?” Bobby teases.

“No, I like Christmas. I just think it needs to stay in December.”

“But here you are ordering a festive hot chocolate,” he counters.

“Only because Henrik is nice.”

“Hm? So you like Henrik but you still don’t like me? That really doesn’t seem fair,” he pouts, making her shake her head some more.

“I said he’s _nice_ , I barely know the guy.”

Henrik watches as the two bicker, taking note of their body language. They stand apart from each-other, but turned into face one another. Lexi’s hands sit in her pockets, a sign that she’s relaxed, and Bobby’s leaning on the counter, a playful smirk on his lips, dimples fully on show. Henrik smiles to himself, because Bobby is absolutely flirting. And sure, he flirts a lot, but Henrik can sense something going on here. Not to mention the fact that he’s clearly taken this girl out on a date. 

Henrik places two mugs on saucers onto a tray and pushes it towards them. The mugs are orange with a blue lip, and depict different nature scene line drawings. One has a mountain range on it, and the other a forest.

“Cream?” He asks, holding an aerosol already.

“Obviously,” grins Bobby.

“Okay,” Lexi agrees.

Henrik squirts a healthy dollop of cream on each mug, then pumps something into the till. 

“£6 please.”

Lexi starts to open her bag and grab her purse, but Bobby sticks a hand out to stop her.

“No, no. You have to let me pay. That’s part of the date thing,” Bobby insists.

“Isn’t that a bit sexist?”

“It’s more that I invited you out, so I should offer to pay. If they invite you out and expect you to pay it’s a little off. But that doesn’t mean you can’t suggest paying or splitting the bill, it’s just manners to offer. Today however, I insist,” he grins as he swipes his card from his wallet and holds it over the reader.

Bobby picks up the tray and they walk over to a table right in the corner, the armchairs an old worn cushioned leather. The table is scratched but varnished, giving off a homely rugged feel. The café is fairly busy, but the corner they sit in feels like their own little world, an artwork of a stag in a forest next to their table. The place is mostly full of couples, with a few families, but it’s relaxed despite its business. Lexi grabs her spoon and absentmindedly spoons some cream into her mouth. 

Henrik is serving another customer, all smiles. How can such a polite lad be friends with Bobby? Although, everyone likes Bobby. Perhaps Henrik is the same. She wasn’t actually sure Lucas was the coffee date type, but she was willing to see what Bobby was planning to do and say. She also remembers how he’d called this their first stop, was he really planning to do more?

“So how do you know Henrik?”

“I come here a fair bit. We just got on really well.”

Bobby takes a sip of the hot drink and Lexi watches his throat rise and fall. When he moves the mug away, there is cream over his top lip and his nose. She’s hit with a sudden desire to reach over and wipe the cream from his face with her fingers. _Or her lips_. Oh god. Backspace. Delete thought. _That never went through my mind_ , she thinks, _it’s just a silly impulsive thought. I don’t actually want to lick cream off of Bobby McKenzie’s face. Right?_ The more she tries not to think about it the more it flashes through her mind, and she’s hoping to hell she isn’t blushing.

He grins mischievously as though he knows what she’s thinking.

“It’s a look, right?” He sits there, not seeming to make any effort to wipe his face clean.

“Definitely not,” she scoffs, still fighting the urge to just clean it off. But she doesn’t really want her hands on his face. She remembers the hug they’d shared at her flat, how warm and muscular he was, the way he smelled. And then she thinks about the selfie they took at the club, and Bobby’s soft cheek on her face. _No, definitely don’t want to be that close again._

There’s a pause.

“Does Henrik have a romantic partner?” She asks to take her mind off the trail of thoughts.

“Why, over Mr Grey already?” He chuckles, thinking back to that first night when he’d teased her with her boss infatuation. 

She rolls her eyes. “No, I’m just nosey.” 

“No, he doesn’t have a girlfriend. I don’t think he’d turn down your number if you wanted..?”

“Shut up.”

She can’t take it anymore. He’s still just sitting there like a wally with whipped cream poking off his nose and top lip. He’s like an actual child. What’s he trying to prove by not cleaning his face? She stands and walks over to the station by the counter, where she picks up a napkin.

“Here,” she shoves it into his hands. “You look ridiculous.”

“Tsk,” he clicks his tongue, “your date wouldn’t be happy if that’s how you respond to them.” 

“Luckily you’re not actually my date,” she shoots, watching as he plays with the tissue in his hands.

He smiles as he wipes his face clean. That stupid, fucking smirk. Those stupid, stupid dimples and those damned lips.

“So,” he starts, putting his elbows on the table, “A coffee date. It’s like the pinnacle of dating. 9 times out of 10 it’s a 50/50 toss up on whether you’ll be asked for drinks or coffee,” he wraps one of his hands round his mug, showing off his assortment of rings.

“Coffee _is_ a drink.” 

“Well, obviously. Your jokes are bad,” he says, except he’s laughing.

Bobby pulls out his phone and holds it up to Lexi.

“You should probably smile,” he says.

“You sound like a ‘nice guy’.” She turns her nose up at the phrase and tries to wipe all memories of random men telling her to smile over the years. At least when Bobby says it she can viably deck him.

“I’m taking a photo!” He protests.

Lexi nods, tries to smile, but it looks fake and doesn’t reach her eyes. She wraps her hands round her mug. 

“Ew. Please don’t do that again,” Bobby booms with laughter at her expression.

The smile instantly falls from her face and she stares sternly at Bobby.

“Okay…” he thinks, still holding his phone up ready for a picture. Suddenly he grins as he remembers something that will make her smile. _It’s basic but it’s adorable_. He clacks about on his phone a bit before swivelling the screen and showing it to Lexi. Almost instantly she breaks into a wide, genuine grin.

“Don’t move!” He pulls his camera up again and snaps a picture of Lexi. Her smile is warm and friendly, completely unlike the usual expressions she gives Bobby. He smiles at the picture. “It’s cute.”

She laughs. “I’m a simple girl, really. A picture of a baby Newfie really will just make me smile,” she coos at the thought of the picture again.

He captions the photo with a simple black heart and uploads it to his Instagram story.

“Does Lucas even follow you?” She asks.

“Oh, yeah. He was probably super intrigued after he saw us at the club together,” Bobby chuckles, thinking about what Lucas would do when he saw this adorable photo of Lexi drinking hot chocolate with cream at a sweet little café with Bobby. 

“Weird…” she considers, he must’ve been curious about what Bobby’s like away from the bar where everyone knows his drill.

—-

Lucas is at home, for the first time in ages. Recently he’s had lots of meetings and jobs which take up his weekends, but this Saturday he sits peacefully in his apartment, letting the cold November sun shine through the blinds onto his sofa. He’s just finished eating a slice of avocado on toast, _classy_ , and is now completely slouched into the soft leather of his sofa. He would never slouch in the presence of others, so he takes this moment to bask in the gift of solitude. He’s wearing boxers and a silky dressing gown, he may as well take the time to take advantage of comfortable clothes, given that his usual work getup was stiff and tight. He’ll take the plate to the kitchen in a minute, but for now he needs this. Each of his muscles is slowly unknotting as he sinks into the cushions. Being a bartender is harder than it sounds; you’re on your feet for hours at a time, running from one side of the bar to the other, constantly doing things with your hands. Not to mention the additional work Lucas had now his father was in the process of giving the company over to him. Plus, the exhaustion of being around a girl who made him feel so alive, but that wasn’t allowed to make him feel that way. 

Lucas opens up his phone for some mindless scrolling, when he sees the first story on his Instagram is from ‘lexi.mitch’. It’s a picture of Bobby outside a park, smiling like an idiot. There’s no caption. _Could be worse_ , thinks Lucas, but he still feels his gut twist at the sight of them together. Now of course, he needs to check Bobby’s account, too. Just to see if he’s put anything up. He has. 

Hesitantly Lucas clicks on Bobby’s story. It’s Lexi in a coffee shop, holding a mug piled with cream, smiling into the camera. It’s been far too long since he’s seen that smile. Damn, it’s gorgeous. His heart sinks when he realises he hasn’t seen her smile like that around him in a year. How he’d gone a whole year without it he wasn’t sure, because seeing it now was like the full moon again. Her face is slightly red from the warmth of the coffee, and her chubby cheeks are pushing up on her glasses in a way he missed so fondly. Her soft bangs are curling on her forehead from the humidity, and sit just above her shoulders in gentle curly waves. She’s so effortlessly breathtaking. He can’t get over how truly happy she looks, and his gut is torn between a stinging pang of jealously and an intense warmth that she’s so joyful. He’s not been able to give her that, in so long. He’s not been treating her how she should be treated, but it appeared Bobby was.

_“You made me feel so, so worthless. And you’ve just gone and done it again.”_

Her voice from the other night echoes in his head, and he feels like crying. The look in her face that night was heartbreaking. She’s good at blanking out discernible emotion from her features, but he could see the desperation in her eyes. Those eyes he once saw such excitement and desire in. He never, ever wanted to hurt her. He never wanted her to feel worthless. Because she is the complete opposite, she means everything to him.

He turns back to the photograph, holding his thumb on the screen so the picture doesn’t disappear. She’s dressed far more casually than he’s used to seeing her, and it definitely suits her. The cosy jumper she’s wearing is loose and comforting to Lucas. 

Then he recognises a blonde head in the background. It’s Wilderness Coffee. It’s his best friend’s café.


	18. Touchy Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby and Lexi continue their date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Heart Of Glass (Live from the iHeart Festival) - Miles Cyrus (cover)  
> Cigarette Daydreams - Cage The Elephant  
> The Less I Know The Better - Tame Impala

Lucas and Henrik had met at school. Kind-of. Lucas went to private school and was quite popular, Henrik was four years younger, went to state school, and kind of an outcast. One day when Lucas had come out of school, a bunch of year sevens were bullying the state school kid on his way home. Lucas knew he had authority and respect at the school, and he was four years older than the bullies, so he stepped in call them off. To be honest, Henrik had been doing a pretty good job himself, but he was only one versus four. 

Since then, Lucas sort of took Henrik under his wing, and as they reached adulthood they became really good friends, and Henrik grew into his own. When Henrik started up his own café Lucas was so proud, and despite being busy they still made time to go camping and on road trips together. He is pleased that so many people know about Wilderness Coffee, that Lexi and Bobby are there _right now_ , but there’s also this little voice in the back of his head saying he should visit. He won’t, of course, as much as he dislikes seeing her with someone else, Lexi is her own woman and doesn’t need to be stalked by some ex-fling. He pulls up the photo again. He considers screenshotting, but doesn’t. He needs to get a grip.

He groans as he stands up from the black leather sofa. His apartment is sleek and sophisticated, with a black theme. _It’s only coffee._ He tells himself. _But they’ve been seeing each other for weeks, surely something has happened…_

He tries to expel the thought from his mind by washing his plate furiously. She’s not his. And that’s his fault. He has no one to blame for this but himself, and if he’s going to be angry about it it’s himself he should be angry at. He thinks about how she would look tucked into the nook of his sofa with that hot chocolate in her hands, smiling at him with her cheeks hitting her glasses which are steamed up from the drink. _I need to stop doing this to myself. I either need to confess to her, or make the conscious decision to once and for all move on. That’s what I’ll do. I’ll move on. Let her be, stop causing her grief._

—-

Lexi and Bobby finish up their hot chocolates and make their way out.

“See you soon, man!” Bobby calls to Henrik.

“Bye Bob! Bye Lexi!” The blonde man calls back, grinning wide and waving at them both.

They step back out into the cool November breeze, put their jackets back on and start walking down the road. It’s busier now than it was earlier, people coming out for lunch or brunch and going about their weekend activities.

“Where are we going now?” Lexi asks, mulling one foot in front of the other. They’re both shivering a little from the cold. 

“Somewhere warmer. And more exciting,” Bobby jumps ahead, walking backwards down the path. A couple of people have to jump out of his way.

“Oh I see, we’re still being all mysterious about it?”

“Obviously, makes things more exciting,” he grins, falling back to walk forward with Lexi again.

“So is this the final stop or…?”

“It’s all I have planned, but I won’t blame you if you want to spend more time with me afterwards,” he winks. She shakes her head and rolls her eyes at the same time.

Despite his recent dating lull, Bobby knew how to impress a girl. He knew the kind of things that were simple yet enjoyable. Take them to a coffee shop, a bar, a nice eatery; tell them they look good, but also that they’re funny, interesting, kind. He’d never really been at the point in a relationship where he knew enough about them to know exactly where they wanted to go or exactly what they wanted to do, but he had good catch-all’s. He’d also never been at the point in a relationship where he was able to show them exactly what _he_ liked to do, but he didn’t mind so much. Things were how he liked them. As he did consider on occasion, he’s sure one day he’ll be baking cupcakes with the love of his life, icing sweet nothings on the top. 

At this point, he probably did consider Lexi a friend, even if she didn’t consider him the same. They saw each other at least once a week, and he enjoyed it. It was funny to him how set she was in trying to show no emotion, when he’s seen those glimmers of the real her. He had the opportunity to unpack her, whereas all his other friends are pretty much open books. Gary literally has a crane tattooed on his body, and if that doesn’t say how un-mysterious he is, there is no telling what will. Marisol is always trying to psychoanalyse people, but herself is actually quite a simple girl. She puts herself first but does care deeply for others, and she likes to try and see things logically. Elisa is a party-girl through-and-through, and won’t hesitate to tell you how she feels. If someone asked Bobby what Lexi’s main personality trait is? He’d say that scary way she stares at him. There is so much he is still to find out.

They hop on the tube and go a couple of stops to South Kensington until they get where they need to be.

“The science museum? I’ve lived in London for like, five years, of course I’ve been to the science museum,” Lexi declares with an off hand gesture to the building in front of them.

“Yeah, but you’ve never been with me. Come on.” Bobby leads her across the cobbles with a hand resting on the small of her back. She doesn’t flinch away. It’s a nice contrast to the cold around them, his warm hand splayed over the back of her coat, the heat seeping through her layers.

“You’ve been here before, and didn’t try to tell me it’s for kids. That’s a good start as far as I’m concerned,” Bobby points out as they go through the double doors.

“It’s fun,” she shrugs, face still stoic. “Kids shouldn’t get all the fun - they only exist for like 15 years.”

Bobby laughs. “Let me guess, you hate children.”

“You make an awful lot of assumptions, I actually like kids.”

Bobby is surprised. “Alright, I’ll believe it when I see it. Do you think you want kids some day?”

“If I meet the right person, maybe.” They look at each other for a moment, in agreement over the statement. Lexi then feels a sudden desire to change the subject back: “I just think it’s fun, and that we shouldn’t be judged for having fun.”

“Ooooh yeah it is. I mean there’s touchy things!!” Bobby enthuses as they stand in the queue. “Being an adult sucks sometimes, but I think there’s a lot more good stuff than most people give credit for.”

Lexi seems to nod in agreement. 

They collect their free tickets, have their bags checked, and enter the museum.

“They sure don’t have one of these in Glasgow.” Says Bobby as they step into the main room.

“So you’re from Glasgow?” Lexi hadn’t heard much about Bobby’s childhood, not that she’d asked. She’d obviously deducted that he was Scottish, but didn’t know enough about Scotland to pin down an accent.

“Born and bred. Dad’s Jamaican but moved to good ol’ Glasgow when I was born, where he’d met Mum on holiday,” he shares, smiling as he thinks about his parents. She wants to ask more about them, but thinks she’ll save it for another time.

“I’ve been to Glasgow, and I distinctly remember visiting a Science Centre.”

“That’s different. I went to that one as a kid. This is the London Science Museum!” He explains.

“Okay… whatever you say,” she concedes, ready to see what his plans are.

They mill around the main room, noting they’d visit the gift shop on the way out. There are a few machine type exhibits here which they look at, but it’s fairly busy considering it’s a Saturday and all.

Going around the museum with Bobby is actually really fun, and he makes silly comments or silly faces about lots of the exhibits. He actually manages to make her ugly laugh a few times, causing them to get stares from some other visitors. They spend almost three hours just casually meandering the museum and taking part in the interactive exhibits. Both Bobby and Lexi were more the creative types than scientific types, but they also knew it was restrictive to only ever declare to have fun in one field. Especially when this one had touchy things. Lexi realises once more, that spending the day with Bobby has made her forget all about Lucas, even though the whole thing is because of him. She can’t help but smile at Bobby’s childish awe at the historical machinery and scientific discoveries through time and the interactive exhibits. It’s really, really nice. Nicer than she’d like to admit.

“So what did you think of the date?” Bobby asks as they enter the gift shop.

“Not bad, McKenzie. I’m not sure the guy i’m after is the science museum type though…”

“You never know, boys like touchy things! Either way though, I bet you could ask him out now.”

Her eyes go wide. “Are you kidding? No way.”

“Why not?”

She blushes. _I guess it’s time to spill_. “I kind of had a go at him a few days ago…”

“What? Why? This is a bit confusing, you know.”

“Well, he sorta tried to kiss me, but didn’t, and I just got really annoyed about it and everything else.” She’s not sure why she’s telling Bobby, but because he’s not one of her close friends it feels like the situation stays a little more abstract. 

“Everything else? Do you mean… Sex with Lex?” He guffaws at his rhyme.

She gives him the most disgusted look he can imagine, and he bursts into peals of laughter.

“Sorry…” he tries to collect himself, and picks up a named pen to distract himself. “Joan?”

She puts her thumb and forefinger to the bridge of her nose and shakes her head furiously. She picks up a pen with ‘Robert’ on it.

“This is yours.” She shoves it at him. 

“My name isn’t Robert, though. It’s just Bobby.”

“You were just born Bobby?” She says, confused.

“That’s right.” He nods.

“Robert isn’t a very sexy name so I guess that’s good for you. Then again… Bobby…” she inhales sharply and makes an uneasy face.

“Rude!” He pretends to be hurt, spinning the pen rack until he comes across another. She laughs. “This has got to be your name. Alexandria,” he flourishes his had to reveal the named pen.

“Close. It’s Alexandra. These things are so rubbish for actually having people’s names though,” she frowns at the extra I.

He grins triumphantly at his near victory. He scans the shelf again and pulls out a pen with the correct name on.

“It suits you, but kinda doesn’t,” he holds the pen up next to her like a name tag.

“That makes sense,” she scoffs.

“Hard to explain. But it makes sense in my head. Anyway, what happened to the sex with Lex argument?” 

She rolls her eyes at the phrase. “That was pretty much it, but he didn’t wanna talk about it and said I should go home. So I did.”

“Oof. King of mixed signals,” he shakes his head.

“I’m not sure. I don’t actually think he’s interested, I think I’m just superimposing.”

“Nah, I’ve seen how he looks at you. He just doesn’t want to admit it for whatever reason.” Bobby knew those stolen glances from the bar meant more than she thought they did. For some reason Lucas was just holding back from being honest with her. Hopefully Bobby could help bring things to fruition though. Well, that’s what he told himself. Actually, Bobby wants to tell Lexi then to stop pining after Lucas. She doesn’t deserve this, and he’s annoyed about it. But Bobby doesn’t want to think too much about what that might mean. 

_I’m an empath. No one should be treated like that._

But he doesn’t. After all, he’d agreed to this, and he _is_ a man of his word.

“I don’t know…”

“But hey; I’m buying you this pen,” he grins, spinning it in his hand. It’s one of those ones with four colours in.

“I don’t need a pen Bobby.”

“It’s a fun reminder of your first date.”

“Hey! I have been on dates, just not loads,” she defends herself.

“You can’t stop me.” He slides away from her and joins the queue to pay.

“Well now I feel bad,” she shouts over at him, and picks up the ‘Robert’ pen.


	19. Cinnamon’s Wake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi and Bobby return from their ‘date’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> First Day Of My Life - Bright Eyes  
> Drive - Oh Wonder  
> Cornerstone - Arctic Monkeys

Lexi arrives home to Chelsea sitting on the sofa with a bowl full of Pringles. Chelsea turns her head as the door opens and spots Bobby in the background.

“Bobby! Come in!” The blonde says through a mouthful of crisps. She pauses the TV, which is playing _Gilmore Girls_ , one of Chelsea’s favourites.

“Chels, he’s fine we’ve been out all day,” Lexi explains, trying not to have to make it a thing. She knows he shouldn’t have walked her to her door.

Bobby gasps. “I would love to come in, thank you Chelsea. Alexandra is so mean to me,” he pouts and blinks widely at Lexi.

“Eugh,” she crinkles her nose up, “please don’t.”

“So you guys are on a full name basis huh?!” Chelsea spins fully around to sit facing the door excitedly, holding the bowl up like its popcorn and she’s at the cinema. She pats the spot in front of her for Bobby to sit on. He smiles smugly at Lexi as he enters the flat and jumps on the spot Chelsea pointed out. She’s wearing pink checkered pyjama bottoms with a pink hoodie, and her hair is in a tiny little ponytail at the nape of her neck. Lexi sighs and shuts the door, retreating to her room to remove her jacket. She makes Bobby throw her his jacket too and hangs it on her door hooks. If he’s going to stay after all, it might as well be comfortably. His shoes sit by the front door with Lexi’s.

“My names just Chelsea. I wish I could make it longer,” Chelsea grumbles, leaning back into the arm of the sofa and sticking another Pringle in her mouth.

“It already is longer, you make it shorter when people call you Chels,” Lexi laughs. Bobby watches her with that real smile again, not used to how warm and kind it looks.

“Oh yeah. I guess it’s different because everyone already calls me Chelsea, but no one calls you Alexandra.” 

“You wouldn’t believe the amount of people who try and call me Robert,” Bobby shoots a teasing glance at Lexi. “That isn’t my name though, by the way,” he adds for Chelsea’s sake.

“It’s like Lottie! No one ever calls her Charlotte. It just doesn’t suit her. Some people are better with a nickname than others,” Lexi says as she perches in the empty spot next to Bobby. Her thigh gently presses against his and she tries not to think about the contact too much.

“Oh my god! Imagine trying to shorten Hope’s name! She’d be Ho!” Chelsea bursts out in fits of giggles. This causes Bobby and Lexi to laugh as well.

“Ho Ho Ho!” Mocks Bobby, setting Chelsea off again.

“You’re an idiot,” Lexi shakes her head. “Ugh, I’m hungry. All I’ve had is hot chocolate and that snack bar from the gift shop. I’m gonna make some food, want anything Chels?” She gets up from the sofa and ambles over to the kitchen. _I may also want to remove myself from beside Bobby._

“I haven’t had dinner yet. This is my pre dinner snack. It’s barely 5 after all. Are you staying Bobby?” Chelsea asks.

“No-“ Lexi tries to protest but is interrupted by Bobby.

“That would be lovely. Thank you, Chels,” he cuts her off with a sly smile.

“You can’t call her Chels! That’s my nickname for her,” Lexi protests.

“It’s alright, Lexi, you two are kind of… together anyway… or whatever,” Chelsea tittles.

Lexi makes a face that Chelsea can’t see, and rummages around the cupboards for food inspiration. 

“You want some help, Lex? I’m pretty good around the kitchen,” Bobby asks, and she hears the hint of humour in his voice at his nickname for her.

“No, thanks. I need to just do a bit of cooking, you know?” 

“She cooks and bakes to clear her head,” Chelsea attempts to whisper at Bobby, but Lexi hears everything. She knows it’s not her fault, but Chelsea’s loose lips could be a little problematic, especially when she’s trying to keep some walls up for Bobby.

Bobby grins at this revelation. He’s more a baker than a cook, but this is exactly what he loves to do. Especially when he needs to clear his head, or something is on his mind. He’d whip up some cupcakes or cookies, or sometimes venture out into more niche recipes like the time he’d made a ‘Brookie’ – a brownie topped with a layer of cookie. He likes to experiment with flavours and textures, some music on in the background and either the sunlight seeping through his windows, or the curtains right shut with the warm kitchen lamps on. They have more in common than Lexi seems to like to admit. He can’t wait to find out what else there is.

Lexi pulls out from the cupboards some noodles and peanut butter, along with other spices and flavours, and an assortment of vegetables from the fridge. She clings and clangs about cooking the satay stir fry while Chelsea and Bobby settle in together to watch _Gilmore Girls_. Bobby has never seen it. 

“You’re lucky I’ve only just started my rewatch today! I’m on episode five of season one,” Chelsea says to him as she turns the telly back on.

As Lexi cooks, various opinions about the show float up to her. 

“Luke is definitely in love with Lorelai. Max can fuck off.”

“I know right!”

/

“Emily and Richard don’t seem as bad as Lorelai says they are.”

“They aren’t really!”

/

“I’m going to cry. Poor Cinnamon.”

/

After about half an hour, their dinner is ready and Lexi plates it up and brings it over to Chelsea and Bobby on the sofa.

“This looks delish!”

“Thank you for cooking for me, it’s actually really nice,” Bobby teases, but he means it.

They all tuck in while they continue watching the TV. It’s feels pretty natural, and not all that strange to have Bobby sandwiched between Chelsea and Lexi, Chelsea even rests her feet on Bobby’s lap which he doesn’t complain about, instead casually resting a hand over them. It just feels weirdly comfortable and normal. Bobby becomes really invested in _Gilmore Girls_ and before they know it they’ve watched three episodes together, their plates of satay finished and on the coffee table, forgotten.

“Alright ladies, I should probably be off. I thank you very much for your kind hospitality, delicious food, and fun entertainment,” Bobby announces, tapping his knees like every other British man in history when they’re about to leave somewhere. He had been made to feel very welcome, despite Lexi’s brusque nature, he could tell there was no real malice there. Like he said, it really was starting to feel, to him at least, like they were becoming friends, and he was starting to see her a little more for who she was.

“Aww, no!” Chelsea pouts. “You’re so fun, Bobby! You have to come another time!” 

“Ah, well, that depends on if I’m allowed,” he shoots Lexi a wink. “But I shouldn’t keep you any longer. You’ve done enough already.” Bobby stands up and stretches exaggeratedly.

“I’ll grab your jacket.” Lexi walks over to her room and grabs Bobby’s jacket plus the ‘Robert’ pen. She hands him them and he in exchange hands her the ‘Alexandra’ pen.

“Hold on to that, it’s a very special gift,” he mocks, carefully placing it in her hands. 

She rolls her eyes and gives him his a with a little less care.

“Careful! If Robert breaks it’s your fault.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

She follows him over to the door and rests on it as it hangs open for him to leave. He pulls Chelsea into a hug, which she’s very happy to reciprocate, before coming over and tapping Lexi on the shoulder as goodbye. They haven’t hugged since that first night, but neither of them are sure why.

“Okay, see you later alligator!” He calls as he steps out of the door.

“Bye, Bobby,” Lexi waves after him.

She is finding it difficult to admit to herself, that she’d actually really enjoyed today. Coffee, a museum, and then food and TV? It would be the last thing she’d ever admit to Bobby, but it was absolutely her perfect date. 

—-

At work on Monday, Lucas comes into the store room on a break. He simply stands at the door awkwardly for a bit, as Lexi looks over from the shelves she’s stacking.

“Hey. What do you need?”

“Uh, orange juice, please.” He’s not looking in her eyes, as usual. She shakes her head undetectably at this and grabs a carton of orange juice. She throws it at him which he luckily catches flawlessly.

“Thanks.”

She nods. He cradles the carton to himself like it’s a baby.

“How are you?” He asks. _Oh god. Really? Again?_

“Yeah, okay. You?”

He just nods and there’s a smile which doesn’t quite meet his eyes. He turns to go, before turning back, about to say something else.

“I’m glad he’s making you happy,” Lucas finally comes out with. His voice is soft and quiet but detectable. He finally meets her eyes, and she can’t quite pin down the expression on his face. It looks like he’s just come to some kind of decision. 

Obviously he’s talking about Bobby, and obviously he doesn’t know that she’s not that happy and Bobby doesn’t have anything to do with her. And she’s not that happy because she wants to be with Lucas. But she supposes that’s the whole point. Lucas isn’t a mind reader. And this was after all her plan. Well, Bobby’s plan which she agreed to. She really wants to scream at Lucas and tell him all this; she’s not happy and won’t be until she’s in Lucas’ arms. But it won’t change anything. Lucas is as mysterious and emotionless as ever and honestly she isn’t sure what her game plan from here on out is. If she could just work up the guts to tell him, to stop being embarrassed by his pragmatism and just accept that his answer might not be the one she wants to hear. For a minute she thinks she might say something, but she doesn’t.

Lucas is kind of dying inside as he says this, but he really does just want her to be happy. That’s all he ever wanted. He wished to high hell and back that it could be him that made her feel that way, but it couldn’t. He was too late. And he wasn’t sure whether if she wasn’t involved with Bobby it would make any difference anyway. His sole focus was, and had to be, the business. Even though every cell in his body wanted to rip that apron off there and then and throw a middle finger up to his father, leaving the bar with Lexi in his arms, he couldn’t do that. He was too sensible. Too respectful of his fathers wishes despite the fact his father had never been respectful of Lucas’ wishes. After all, he’d told himself he’d leave her be. But god, he’s really losing his grip on this whole thing, and he won’t be surprised if one day soon he does something else he’ll regret.

“Thanks,” is all she can muster up. She doesn’t really know what else to say.

“I’m sorry that I-“ he shakes his head. After scrunching his face up and shutting his eyes tightly, he spins on his heel and leaves back through the door.


	20. An Apartment In Kensington

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucas texts Lexi that they need to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Cherry Wine (Live) - Hozier  
> Opera House - Cigarettes After Sex  
> Georgia - Vance Joy

On the Sunday of that week, the 29th November, Lexi gets a text. She’s been thinking about Lucas ever since their conversation, and had never expected him to text. She’s laying in bed with a cup of tea and _She’s The Man_ on in the background. She’s kind of a sucker for Romantic Comedies, even if admitting that wasn’t something she did often. But the text pulls her from her distracted blissful night off work.

 **Lucas** : Can we talk?

Words which can incite dread in their recipient in any context and any language.

 **Lexi** : ok?

 **Lucas** : In person.

 **Lexi** : it’s 9pm i’m in bed

Even if it sounds scary though, she can’t avoid it forever. Best to rip the plaster off now right? Maybe she’d even pull up the guts to do what she’d been wanting to do for so long now. Or maybe not.

 **Lexi** : ok but everywhere will be closed it’s sunday 

**Lucas** : I can come to you.

 **Lexi** : my roommate is chelsea. you saw how she was at hope’s

 **Lucas** : Okay, you can come to me.

He sends his location. The apartment is in Kensington. Of course it is. Lexi has never been to Lucas’ apartment, and the idea fills her stomach with pins and needles. Thinking about sitting on his sofa, being in his kitchen… seeing his bedroom, it feels so intimate. It’s where he is when he isn’t at work, a situation incredibly rare to Lexi. An image pops up in her head of Lucas right now, sat on his sofa texting her. _But what for?_ She imagines him with a plan, maybe he’s going to tell her to back off and leave him alone. Not that she’d been very forthcoming in her feelings for him, but perhaps he gleaned from their recent fight that she likes him. And perhaps that made him uncomfortable. She is scared to find out, but regardless hoping for some kind of closure either way. God, what if it isn’t even about that? What if it’s a work thing? But who asks someone to their house over a work thing? Whatever, no point agonising about it when it will go however it ends up going.

Lexi slips on a mid-shin length floral skirt and a silky yellow short-sleeved button up. She shrugs on a long draping trench coat and laces up her boots. She doesn’t pack a bag, she doesn’t expect she’ll be there long enough to need anything. Since it’s late and Lexi’s tired, she calls a cab to take her to Kensington. 

It rolls up outside a definitely posh looking block of apartments. Lexi knows Lucas has money but, _wow_. His text says he’s upstairs in the penthouse, so she buzzes up and he lets her in. 

Standing at his door, she’s met again with that pins and needles feeling. What if he regrets this and sends her home straight away? What if the sight of her makes him sick of her even more? _Shit. Okay. Just knock,_ She thinks. She pulls up a clenched fist and knocks on the door twice.

—-

Lucas throws his phone away from him as soon as the noise indicates that his text has sent. Maybe he shouldn’t have sent that. She is more than likely still angry at him about the other week. About the almost-kiss and his backing out once again. Or about the other day when he just couldn’t get the words out. Or basically angry about pretty much everything he had ever said or done to her. Ugh. But then his phone beeps with a response and he scrambles to read it. She’s straight to the point, as ever. 

When he finally gets her to agree to come to him, he instantly regrets it. Because now she would think he was asking her for other reasons. Or maybe she thought he was weird. But thinking about her in his apartment is strange, seeing _her_ in _his_ space. 

—-

The door swings open to reveal Lucas. His apartment is large and sleek. It’s obvious he has a lot of money. He stands by the door, usual poker face on, but he does look different. He’s wearing a dark blue short sleeve button down and black jeans, and the casual look suits him. The motorbike tattoo on his bicep is on show. His hair isn’t gelled up like it usually is, but it sort of sits up by itself soft and spiky, encroaching down on his forehead a bit. Lexi internally hits herself for ogling over how good he looks right now.

“You came.” He looks like he wasn’t actually expecting her to come at all.

“You asked me to.” As she says this she is hit with the sudden realisation that she would do anything he asked. 

“I did. Here, come in.” He steps to the side of the door opening the gap for her to enter the apartment. It’s honestly exactly what she would’ve expected from Lucas’ flat. A black, sleek penthouse in central London. Pretty much sums him up. 

“Can I get you anything?” He clears his throat.

“No, thanks.”

“Right, yeah.”

“What am I doing here?” She asks. She is afraid that she’s going to be made a fool again, and her defences are coming up.

“I… look it’s…” he seems to be struggling once again to get the right words out. Lexi is losing her patience. They are still standing just barely in the threshold.

“Nuh uh. Not this again we are NOT doing this again-“ Lexi starts to protest.

“No. I know. I’ve been unfair,” Lucas starts. She raises an eyebrow for him to go on. “I just want you to know that I’m really sorry, for everything that happened. I wanted to let you know in person so you know I mean it. I’m sorry I was so unprofessional and acted on my impulsive feelings. And then for making you feel that way about yourself…” he slumps down into the sofa behind him.

He’s been drinking, the sweet caramel smell of whiskey radiating from him. But he is still coherent and if it weren’t for the open bottle on his coffee table and the smell from his breath, she wouldn’t know.

“I’ve been behaving like an absolute plonker. You deserve so much more than that. It’s just I’ve been so worried about work, and I had to put it first. And now I’ve realised that’s maybe not the wisest move, but you’re with Bobby anyway,” he puts his finger and thumb to the bridge of his nose.

She melts under his guilt. Suddenly she has an urge to tell him it’s okay. To say that she wasn’t hurt, he didn’t make her feel bad, she shouldn’t have expected so much from him. Everything she has to say to him that she couldn’t say the other day is obsolete in the face of his apology. She can’t bear him beating himself up. 

He exhales loudly, hands on his knees. “I have to say it. I really can’t go another day without at least saying it,” he runs a hand down his face in preparation, then sets his eyes to focus directly on hers. “That night… it’s never left my mind. I can’t explain it but it’s like we just… were right for each other. And I know you’re otherwise engaged these days. But it’s killing me. Seeing you with him? It’s killing me. Every time he’s at the bar I have to watch you with him. I can’t escape it at home – he’s all over your social media. I know it’s not right of me. I _know_ it’s unfair. But I like you, so much. I’ve liked you since you walked through those doors at work,” he looks over to his door as though he’s remembering it as the bar’s doors at that moment. “And I cant stop thinking about you. When you’re at the bar and laughing with the customers, it’s like you’re warming me from the inside. When we make eye contact for the tiniest moment – my heart stops. And I miss you when you’re not around. I miss the way your cheeks move when you smile, that thing you do with your earring, how you blow your hair out of your face. I’m sorry, but I really fucking like you.”

She’s stunned. She doesn’t know what to say at all. This is really not what she had been expecting. Lexi is absolutely and utterly speechless in this moment. Did Lucas… actually just admit his feelings for her? Is this some kind of dream? And there’s a sense of anger, that he’d waited so long to do something about it. That he’d given her the cold shoulder and the impression that really she meant nothing to him. But all along he’d been hiding this. She doesn’t realise how long she’s standing there just staring at Lucas in shock.

Bobby’s plan had worked.

She perches on the sofa beside him, perhaps closer than intended, and rests a hand on his shoulder in comfort.

“Can I… would you sit still a minute?” She asks, taking herself by surprise. She hadn’t expected it to come out, but she had to commit now.

He looks up to her and nods, eyes wide and focused on Lexi. For a moment, nothing happens. Then she moves towards him, trembling with anxiety, shutting her eyes tight. She’s waiting for him to push her away, to tell her to go home. But he doesn’t. His eyes are open and watching her every move. Watching her edge closer. He swallows hard but doesn’t move. He waits with bated breath, her hand clapped tight on his shoulder to steady herself, her gentle moon-like glow warming his night sky. Softly, but surely, her lips reach his, not moving at first. It’s like a moth fluttering in front of a dim lamp. He’s too scared to push for more, too happy to pretend he can actually try and stop this again. The decision he’d made to move on completely forgotten in the face of _Lexi kissing him_. After a couple of seconds, she starts to move her lips gently. It’s a patient, delicately beautiful kiss. A kiss which has been waiting over a year, and which needs savouring as much as possible. 

A thousand lines of Shakespeare run through her head. She thinks of holy palmers kiss and of making heaven drowsy with the harmony. His hands are warm but hesitant moving to the outside of her lower thighs, holding her close on the sofa.

Lucas feels his knees weak and he is helpless. It is so different to the kisses they shared before. It is the kiss they never had that night after work. All the unspoken words and things they should’ve done. He takes in her floral scent, not wanting to miss a single sensation. Her hair tickles his forehead, and her hand has moved to rest ever so faintly on his jaw, scared to take too much. He slides one of his hands to hers, resting his fingers in the gaps between hers. Her lips, slightly chapped from the cold, scared to take too much from him in case she has to take it all back again, and her tongue tasting like sweet tea. 

They move slowly for a moment, before Lexi pulls away.

“Sorry,” she clears her throat, a blush forming on her cheeks. But she isn’t really sorry.

“No. I wanted to do it but I didn’t have the guts,” he brings a hand up to stroke her cheek. 

“You do. You did it the first time.”

He chuckles at this, which Lexi doesn’t expect at all. It’s warm and affectionate, what she’d been craving from him this whole time.

“You’re incredible,” he says, looking into her eyes in a way he hasn’t in so long.

She isn’t ready to wake up from this dream. She bites her lip, wanting to point out how contradictory that statement seems after everything. As though he’s reading her mind, Lucas speaks up again.

“I promise I won’t shut you out again. I do. I just need to think about this for a bit, okay? I’m really glad you came by. And that you let me apologise even after everything.”

And like that, the magical moment is gone. _Time. Time to back out again. I fell for it. A-fucking-gain._

“Uh, yeah. Right. I should go,” she pulls back, that now familiar embarrassment creeping back in. Especially since this time it was her move, her risk to take.

“Yeah, if that’s what you want?” There’s question in his voice, he doesn’t want to press her to stay, but of course it’s what he wants more than anything.

She isn’t sure what she wants. Not at all. She should leave. She really should. But she can’t stop thinking about having him flush against her again.

“Yeah, it is. I’ll see you tomorrow, Lucas.”

His eyes go wide, like he’s suddenly remembering they work together. “Yeah, Yeah, of course. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She makes her way to the door and swings it open, afraid to look back at Lucas again in case she caves to her desires once more. Lucas leans by the door, poking his head out as he watches her disappear down the corridor.

“Lexi?” He calls out. She turns. He gives her a wide, youthful grin. She can’t help but smile back. He looks so beautiful.

—-

She doesn’t know why she’s calling Bobby. Maybe because things are easy with him. She doesn’t care about him enough to put on airs and graces or try to make him like her. Maybe she just wants him to say something utterly idiotic and distract her from her current dilemma. She’s sat back in her bed, recounting the nights events. It all happened so quickly that her brain is still trying to catch up. She’s crying, not quite sure why. The sudden release of all the tension? Getting what she’d wanted for so long? Only to be told once again that something had to be considered? Only to once again feel humiliated? That’s probably it. She isn’t easily embarrassed, and the feeling makes her want to rip her skin off. When he answers his voice is gruff and strained.

“Hey, sorry Lass, I’m kind of busy - can we talk later?” His Scottish inflection crackles through the speakerphone, and she feels an odd sense of calm rush over her. She looks to her clock to see that it’s 1am. Ah shit. He was probably sleeping. 

“Oh, um, yeah,” she’s trying to sound normal, but he detects the slight cry in her voice. _What the hell? Lexi Mitchell crying?_

In the background of the speaker Lexi can hear a female voice, “ _Tell her later again_.”

Oh boy. Of course he’s with someone.

“Hey, look, don’t worry. It’s nothing important,” she rushes and hangs up the phone.

—- 

Lucas sits on his sofa fully reclined, legs spread, glass of whiskey sitting lazily between his fingers. Fuck it. He can do it. He’s a good businessman, and ignoring Lexi was doing anything but help him stay focused. Having her might actually be the push he needs to get his head on straight. Why can’t he have it all? The job, the goals, the girl, the happiness. Well, he can, he tells himself. He will.


	21. An Apartment Near Hampstead Heath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby gets a worrying call from Lexi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> LONELY MACHINES -3OH!3, 100 gecs  
> my future - Billie Eilish  
> Home - chill.

“You know, I can give you my number if you want,” the girl in bed simpers, twirling a piece of hair round her fingers. She’s blonde and short, with deep-set blue eyes.

“You know what they say about too much of a good thing, though,” he says, trying not to turn her down too cruelly. She’s kind of annoying, but she’s there for one reason and one reason only. He’s not sure he can even remember her name. Ellie? Emily? He’s not sure he cares. They’d met at a bar a little while back, gone home together, and then she’d bumped into him a few hours earlier in the little Tesco, the one that opens late on Sundays. She suggested going back to hers, and, well, here they are. He’s not really sure why he’s let them be at it for so long. He’s been here at least two hours now. Boredom, probably. She’s not the kind of girl you want to have your phone number, Bobby thinks. Saccharine sweet and will accept anything you tell her. It’s nicer to have a conversation with a bit of push and pull. He tries to ignore the fact that that makes him think about one specific person.

She pulls him in to kiss her, pushing her body clumsily to his. He responds lazily. Something about tonight, his heart isn’t in it. She’s not the best kisser, kind of toothy, but hey. He rolls over on top of her and they start to grind into each other, already in their underwear anyway. She moans and it kind of makes him cringe, but he continues anyway. His phone ringing pulls them away. He’s kind of pissed. As annoying as the girl is, he had been waiting a while to finally get laid, skirting around doing bits. And, she is really hot.

“Ugh,” she complains, letting him up from her. “Who is it?” She’s nosey.

_**Lex is calling…** _

“It’s my friend. She doesn’t usually call me so it might be important.” In fact, _she’s never called me before_ , he thinks. They’ve known each-other nearly two months and this is the first time she’s ever called him. At 1am on Sunday night. Or Monday morning if one’s being pedantic. The girl behind him groans as he sits on the edge of the bed.

“Don’t be too long.” 

Bobby slides across to accept the call.

“Hey, sorry Lass, I’m kind of busy can we talk later?” He says, despite saying it was important he’s kind of doubting it. Lexi wouldn’t call him in a time of need, she still didn’t even like him. At least that’s what she kept telling him. There’s a light sniff from the other end.

“Oh, um, yeah.” Her voice sounds small. So unbelievably small for a girl who never shied away from her presence. A girl who has never in those two months been afraid to tell Bobby exactly what she’s thinking. There’s this cloying sound as well as though she’s been crying. _Shit_. Why is she calling Bobby crying? This is definitely the last thing he would’ve expected from her. He’s not really sure how to react. Or what to say. 

“Tell her later again,” the girl groans from his bed impatiently. _Oh hell no. She can stop trying to butt into my life right now._

“Hey, look, don’t worry. It’s nothing important,” Lexi scrambles out from the speakerphone before Bobby can say anything and almost immediately the phone beeps to indicate the line has gone dead. _Ah, shit_. He presses to call her again, but it continues to ring out.

“Thank god. Come here,” the girl crawls over to where he sits on the edge of the bed with his back to her, and grabs at his shoulders.

“Look, uh, this has been great. Thanks and all. But my friend’s in trouble and I need to make sure she’s okay.” He doesn’t actually realise what he’s thinking until he’s said it.

“Ugh, wow, okay. Leaving me for some other bitch?”

 _Jesus Christ. No way is she gonna talk like that._ It kind of stings, hearing her speak like that about Lexi.

“With all due respect,” _nope, still can’t remember her name_ , “I like sex but my friends come first. Even if they are sort of a bitch. Which I can say, by the way, but you can’t. Because she’s my friend and you know nothing about her, or me,” he demurs with a bite as he pulls his clothes back on from the floor.

“Chill, babe. You’ve kind of got a stick up your ass,” she upturns her lip, still sitting on the bed in her underwear. He actually laughs at this, thinking about how that’s exactly what he’d say about Lexi. Maybe he’s sort of taking on some of her mannerisms.

“I was actually thinking about giving you my number but, not anymore.” That’s such a lie, but he kind of wants to make her sting a little. The way she stung him. He grabs his coat and exits the flat without looking back at the girl even once. He wasn’t sure what got him so pissed at her, he wasn’t expecting to go on some whole mates before dates spiel either. But here he was, stalking out into the cool night air having told the girl he had to go check on Lexi. But would he actually do it? Well, of course he would. He might be a bit of a player, but he doesn’t like seeing people upset. At least, not people he knows. _Not people he cares about._

He pulls out his phone again and tries calling once more, but it rings out again. What if she had gone to sleep between now and the call before? Maybe he shouldn’t bother her. But she sounded so different. The cloying of her voice pulled at his heartstrings and stung in a way he hadn’t anticipated. And the fact that she had called _him_. Called Bobby, who she ‘didn’t like’, in her time of need. She literally lives with her best friend and Bobby was who she turned to. Unless it was something to do with Chelsea. They could have fallen out. But Bobby highly doubts it, Chelsea’s too sweet and Lexi’s too forgiving of her anyway.

So what happened? It could be a whole number of things. But again, he never pictured Lexi as someone to get upset easily. She doesn’t care what others think of her, she trusts herself too much to let negative things get to her like that. So he rules out any kind of name-calling from anyone. 

Then his mind immediately flickers to an image of a muscular, tall man shaking a metal cocktail shaker. Lucas. It had to be. He must’ve said something to her. They must’ve argued again. She was head over heels for the guy for god knows why and probably in deeper than she’d care to admit to Bobby, hence why she probably kept the fact they’d slept together a secret at first. The hair on the back of Bobby’s neck prickles up in anger as he considers all the things that could’ve happened with Lucas that would actually make Lexi cry.

He hasn’t even noticed that at this point he’s walked all the way down a road, to a little neighbourhood. All the shops are shut and neon lights blink on and off ominously. A couple of drunkards laugh on the pavement, passing a can of lager between them. Where the hell is he? He’d need to call a cab regardless of whether he was seeing Lexi or not to get home. That’s what he tells himself anyway as he types in the number for a London cab company.

—-

Lexi’s flat block stands in front of the park as it always does, lights mostly out but a couple illuminating the little squares of windows. In the park there is no one, in the same way as when Bobby walks Lexi home, but if feels more eerie today.

Just as he’s about to buzz up to Lexi’s flat, a woman steps out of the door with a cigarette in her mouth, so Bobby takes his chance and slips through the open door. He climbs the stairs at what feels like an agonisingly slow pace, the fear of Lexi being asleep creeping into his head once again. What if he’s come all this way and she’s dozed off? Or worse, he wakes her up after she’s finally cried herself to sleep. He’s not usually so negative, or thinking the worst, but the whole random nature of the call had just taken him completely by surprise. Especially when he’d seen her on Friday and she’d been totally normal.

He gets to the fifth floor and walks down to the end of the corridor, where flat 598 and 599 face each other. He pauses a moment, questioning just leaving and going home. But he doesn’t. He places his ear on the door to see if there’s any signs of life, and hears the distant buzz of something on TV. Okay. He doesn’t knock, in case Chelsea’s asleep or Lexi is drifting off, instead sending a text.

 **Bobby** : hey. im outside

**Lexi: what? outside where?**

****

****

**Bobby** : your flat

There’s some shuffling from the flat and then a click as the door unlocks, and opens to reveal Lexi. She is in jogging bottoms and an oversized t shirt and her short hair is in a tiny little ponytail, the bottom of her hair not fitting in it and draping down the back of her neck. She’s wearing her glasses and underneath her eyes are red and puffy. If she didn’t look so upset Bobby would say it’s really cute.

“What the hell are you doing here.” It’s a statement, more than a question. 

“You called. And then didn’t pick up. I’ll go if you want, I just needed to check you were okay,” he says.

She rolls her puffy eyes. “Come in.”

He traipses in behind her and shuts the door, being careful not to be too loud. The lights are off on the main body of the flat, only a buzz of illumination emanating from the ajar bedroom door. She goes into her bedroom and he follows.

The voice of Matthew Broderick rings out across the bedroom. Lexi sits back on her bed and presses pause on the buttons.

“Huh. _Ferris Bueller’s Day Off_. I should’ve guessed this was your favourite film.” After their conversation at Halloween it actually was something Bobby had been thinking about, but he hadn’t yet reached a conclusion.

She shrugs. “Shut the door. Chelsea’s asleep.”

He obeys and leans awkwardly on the door once it is shut. He’s reminded of the last time he was in Lexi’s bedroom and how much has changed since then. Except he still feels just as awkward somehow. Her bedside table looks much the same, except a box of tissues covers the book, previously _The Beautiful and The Damned_ but now swapped with _A Room with a View_ by E. M. Forster. Instead of a half full tube of Oreos there’s a tube of Lidl’s own knock-off Salt & Vinegar Pringles, the lid hanging off. The room isn’t as well-made as it was before. Her bedcovers are strewn over the bed and a few garments lie on the floor, he spots a yellow shirt and a floral skirt.

“You can sit down. Just take your shoes off,” she says.

Bobby looks around the room and there is no chair. He slips his shoes off and perches on the edge of the bed.

“Still a bit confused as to why you’re here,” she says.

“Look, I- I don’t want to pry but, like, you kind of called me at 1am and it sounded like you were crying. I was a bit worried when you didn’t pick up after that.”

“Nah, I’m fine, just one of those things.” She leans over and grabs the tube of crisps, sticking her hand in as a way to distract from the conversation. “Stacking potato snack?” She asks, holding the tube out to him. Bobby laughs.

“Okay. If you say so.” He grabs a handful of crisps. “Do I get any more details than that? It was my number you called after all…” he teases. She shoots him a stare.

“I don’t know. I guess it’s a mixture of relief and frustration. I went to see Lucas tonight.”

“Oh?” Oh.

She blushes and stuffs another crisp into her mouth to try and ignore it. “He said he’s gonna stop shutting me out but that he needs time or something, I don’t know.”

“Oh,” he furrows his brow. There’s something she’s not telling him. It’s so weird to see her opening to him like this, regardless. “Was there more sex with Lex?” He asks, trying to lighten the mood, but there’s an uncomfortable twist in his stomach as he thinks about it. Turning regardless of whether she slept with him again or not. She shakes her head in exasperation.

“Just a kiss.”

“A kiss? Just a kiss?! Lexi, my darling, kissing means everything,” he drawls dramatically. 

“I thought you said sex means everything? Which is weird coming from your mouth anyway.”

“No, I said sex _changes_ everything. I already told you, it’s a different situation when feelings are involved. Did he kiss you?”

“I kissed him.”

“Oh.”

She shrugs, looking at him with a simple innocence in her eyes. “I’d rather regret something I did than something I didn’t.”

“Yeah, I get it,” he says, regretting everything he isn’t doing.

“I don’t know. I just got caught up in everything for a moment. I don’t know why I called you. And then I realised it was stupid which is why I didn’t answer your calls back. And uh, it sounded like you were busy anyway.”

“Nah. Just some lassie I met in Tesco. You’re my mate now, remember?”

“Tesco? Classy. You sure know how to woo the ladies. I’m still not agreeing to be your friend.”

“What?” He feigns shock with a gasp, “even after you called me with your dire post-kiss conundrum?!”

She hits him on the shoulder. “Shut up. I didn’t ask you to come here.”

“Well it’s too late anyway because I’m here now.”

And as he says this Lexi notices how he sits opposite her on her bed, cross legged, as though he’d always done it. A dopey grin painted over a mouth stuffed with stacking potato snacks. He acts as though they’ve known each other for years, and him coming to see her out of the blue like this is normal for them. Just like she’d had that odd feeling that she needed to call Bobby.

 _I’m here now_ , Bobby’s voice repeats in her mind. _He’s here now_. Suddenly she’s hit with a wave of comfort at the presence of the boy who’d done her a favour once, in a bar.


	22. Sweet Disposition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s time for Lexi to go back to work, and she’s worried how it will go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Sweet Disposition - Temper Trap  
> Atlas Hands - Benjamin Francis Leftwich  
> Broke - Bear Attack!

It’s nearly 4am, and Bobby and Lexi sit on her bed, leaning against the headboard. _Ferris Bueller’s Day Off_ has just finished, and an empty tube of fake Pringles sits between them. Lexi just kind of didn’t have the heart to tell him to leave after he’d come all this way, and she didn’t think she’d be able to sleep anyway. There was too much to think about. Every time her mind wanders she thinks about kissing Lucas. How slow, and sweet it was. But also needy and full of so much that had gone unsaid. His smile as she’d turned back to him sends her stomach and heart fluttering, something she isn’t used to seeing at all. It was like he truly let himself relax and be happy for a bit.

“I don’t know why they thought they could get away with casting that guy as Cameron. He’s so old!” Bobby exclaims. 

“Eh. Everyone’s old in high school films.” Lexi turns the TV off and rests the remote on the floor beside her.

“Fair point. We could be playing high schoolers right now.”

She squints her eyes at him.

“How old even are you?” She asks. She’d guessed he was around her age, but she hadn’t actually worked out his birthday from ID-ing him at the bar because she only tended to focus on if the year was 18 years prior. And she wasn’t very good at maths.

“24. I’m legal I promise! You’ve seen my ID!” He giggles, holding his hands up.

She rolls her eyes. “You act like a 4 year old sometimes.”

“Well, how old are you?” His hands fall back down to the space between them.

“23, my birthday was a few months ago.”

“Huh, you act like a 53 year old sometimes.”

“Very funny.”

He laughs at his own joke. His head falls back and from the side Lexi can see his little dimples creasing in his cheeks and his eyes folding up in the corners a bit. His movements are kind of slow, like he’s tired. Well, he probably is, it is the early hours of the morning after all. He lolls his head to the side to look at her. His eyes sparkle under the lamplight and he wears a faint smile.

“So you guys kissed,” he says, raising an eyebrow, “you wanna show me how you did it?” He jokes.

“Yeah?” She asks, leaning in. She grins back at him.

He’s taken aback by her answer, but shrugs cockily. She’s really close to his face now. He can see her wide grey eyes, now less puffy than earlier, flicking between his own eyes, like she can’t decide which one to look at. He starts to feel a bit nervous, is she actually going to kiss him?

She grins smugly, places a hand on his jaw, and yanks at his ear.

“Ow!” He yelps back and cradles his ear with his hand.

“Were you really expecting me to do it?” She cackles, her cheeks pushing up her glasses on her face.

“I don’t know, I’m kind of irresistible,” he smirks, massaging his ear as he does so. He knew the effect he had on women, but he should’ve known by now that Lexi was definitely not one of those people. She’s more into the dark and brooding type, apparently.

“You’re irresponsible is what you are. That poor ‘Tesco lassie’ you left high and dry,” she tuts.

“Nah, she was nothing special. Kind of annoying, too.”

“Like you then.”

He flashes her a pearly grin.

After a little while longer, Bobby decides he should get going. The walk home is cool and refreshing, the sun coming up as he trudges down the residential roads. There are a couple of people out with their dogs, but it’s mostly empty. He’s still surprised by himself for leaving a shag to go to Lexi’s. He would’ve done the same for Gary, or Marisol, even Elisa, but it’s weird because Lexi is so new in his life. He guesses he’s just that kind of a ride or die guy. Still, he was relieved to see that she wasn’t as upset as he’d been worried about. And he’d actually had fun just chilling with her. He wanted to press for more about what had happened with Lucas but she didn’t really seem to want to tell him, so he respected that. The birds sing through the quiet morning air as he nears in on his own flat block, and he basks in the sub-reality feeling of walking home at 5am in the same clothes as the night before.

—-

Lexi sleeps for most of the rest of the day, waking up at 2pm just in time to rush out to be at work for 3:30. She barely has any time to think about having to see Lucas again after their kiss. Every time it crosses her mind on the commute over - which, to be honest, is frequent - her stomach does somersaults. She’s not been able to think up some kind of plan for what she’s going to say to him, or how they’re allowed to act around each other in a work environment. Does she just smile and say hi as usual before retreating back into the store room? Does she ignore him and wait for him to set the mood? 

A fear comes creeping in at her of their first interaction after they’d slept together, how he’d completely cut her off and ignored anything that had happened. What if he just makes her feel stupid again? But she tries to reassure herself that he had promised he wouldn’t do that again. He might be kind of stand-offish and brooding sometimes, but he is honest. No point worrying about it now when there’s nothing she can do about it. But if he does it again this time, she thinks, it might just be the straw that breaks the camels back.

She’s hyping herself up as she nears the entrance to Koh’s, _just act normal. It’s just a kiss, you’ve done worse before and dealt with that_. She pushes the door open and steps into the warm building. The lighting is dim as usual, and Lexi always thinks the bar looks nicest when it’s empty. It’s clean and the decoration really has a chance to show off. Lucas is sat at a booth fiddling with some paper as usual. He’s back in his normal work wear, hair gelled up again, looking much more put together and professional than last night. Lexi likes him like this – it’s how she best knows him – but seeing him so comfortable and casual last night had been most illuminating. Not to mention he’d looked really cute. As Lucas hears the door shut, he turns to look at Lexi. _Fuck, here we go_ , she worries. Instantly he smiles at her, that wide youthful grin he’d given her the night before, and all her worries are quelled. She melts under his gaze. God, happiness looks so good on him.

“Hey,” he grins, standing to greet her. He reaches a hand out to squeeze hers in greeting and she can’t help but smile back. There had been a part of her so convinced he would change his mind.

“Hey,” she smiles shyly, wanting his hand back on hers again. Lucas looks around behind him to make sure the coast is clear and pulls her to follow him, her desires met as his hand finds hers. He leads her through the store room and into the staff room. It’s empty, she’s the first one there. He smiles as he pulls her over to the corner of the room, his hand gripping at hers sweetly. 

Lucas sets his other hand gently on the back of Lexi’s neck, flipping her hair out of the way so his fingers are on her skin. He pulls her to him, kissing her just as softly as they had the night before. Lexi’s stomach erupts with butterflies again at the sweetness and smoothness of his lips, his fingers tickling the back of her neck. But he breaks away too soon.

“There’s still… lots to figure out but, I will. I want to carry this on. But it’ll have to be kind of on the down-low, because my dads a little… let’s just say against distractions.” _If that was code for he’d freak knowing I like the cleaner girl_ , Lucas thinks, “If that’s okay with you?” 

“Yeah, that’s okay. I understand,” she says, feeling like a giddy teenage girl.

“Okay,” he smiles big again, stroking down Lexi’s hair. He leans in and pecks a kiss to the top of her head. “We’ll talk later?” 

“Yeah. You should get to work.” She tugs playfully at his shirt collar.

He can’t stop smiling at her. Why didn’t he just accept it sooner? He’s going to work so much better now, without the stress and angst. Ugh. Stupid fucking morals.

—-

The bar is averagely medium as Monday nights go, Lottie and Lucas working at a pretty chilled rate. Lexi hums to herself as she flounces around the storeroom, unable to keep her joy shut away. Lucas too is unusually chipper with the customers, and Lottie notices.

“What’s got you so smiley?” She asks at one point.

“It’s December tomorrow. I like December.” 

“Since when?” Lottie chuckles, but doesn’t press any further.

As it turns around 9pm, a familiar tall, slim woman comes through the door. She’s wearing high waisted white jeans and a leopard print cami, with a black coat draped over her shoulders and a gold clutch in her hand. She’s glamorous, and gorgeous. She strides over to the bar, sitting in the stool closest to her.

“Hey, nice to see you again. I thought I’d come see Lexi at work,” Hope smiles at Lucas who has greeted her with a little wave. “I kind of wanted to talk to her, too.”

“Yeah nice to see you! She’s in the back room but I can grab her for you?” He’s secretly hoping she says yes, just so he can see her face again.

“Oh don’t worry, I’ll wait till she’s on break.” Hope places her clutch on the bar in front of her. Lucas nods, not showing that he’s a little disappointed.

“Hope?” Lottie grins as she sees her friend sat at the bar, coming over to Lucas’ side to greet her.

“Hey!” Hope reaches across for an awkward kind of half hug, which Lottie reciprocates.

“What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to see where you girls worked! I also kind of wanted a chat. And a drink wouldn’t go amiss,” she chuckles.

“Okay well I’ll hit you up when we’re on break,” Lottie smiles, noticing she’s needed over on the other side. 

“Yeah! Talk in a bit,” Hope nods.

Lottie returns to the other side of the bar to continue working, and Hope sits just in front of where Lucas is preparing drinks.

“What can I get you?” He asks.

“A gin and tonic, please.”

He nods, and starts to collect ingredients to make the drink.

“So we didn’t really get much of a chance to chat at Halloween, other than a few Never Have I Ever secrets, tell me about yourself.” She leans on her elbows.

“Oh, Uh, there’s not an awful lot to tell. This bar is my fathers,” he clears his throat, “I work here 6 days a week.”

“Ugh, boring! I know you’re more interesting than that, posh boy,” she teases. Is she… flirting? No, she’s just being friendly, Lucas brushes off. 

“I mean I guess but, I wouldn’t know where to start,” he chuckles, and slides her G&T across the bar. He’s pretty certain that none of Lexi’s friends know about what’s happened between them, since they were all pretty nice to him at Hope’s party. They didn’t seem like the kind of friends who’d be nice to a guy they know had slept with their friend and then pretended it never happened. He winces internally as he thinks about it. 

“Okay then, start by telling me how a man like you is single.” Ah shit. Maybe she is flirting. 

He chuckles, trying to be friendly. “I’m married to my job, unfortunately. How’s Noah?” Because the last he checked, he was sure she was in a happy relationship. And he wasn’t about to shout to the world about whatever him and Lexi had going on. Hope’s face falls a bit, and she takes a large sip of her drink. 

“I wouldn’t know, I haven’t seen him in a while.”

“Oh.” Lucas isn’t sure how to respond to this. Because if Hope wasn’t with Noah anymore, this could definitely be described as flirty behaviour.


	23. Without Witness, Without Reward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi finds out what Hope is doing at Koh’s, and Lucas has a bit of a difficult decision to make.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> No. 1 Party Anthem - Arctic Monkeys  
> Waterfalls - Memorecks, Jenna Pemkowski  
> 505 - Arctic Monkeys

“Hey babe,” Lottie waltzes into the storeroom at around 10:30pm. “Break?”

“Yes please,” Lexi groans but with a smile.

“Somethings got you in a good mood,” Lottie smirks, “I guess there’s something in the water.”

“What do you mean?” Lexi blushes a bit, conscious now.

“Nothing.” Lottie has a face however which says she’s harbouring a secret. “Hope’s here by the way.”

“Oh? Alone?” Lexi asks.

“As far as I know.”

“What’s she doing here?”

“I don’t know, says she wanted to chat with us,” Lottie shrugs and purses her lips.

“Oh, okay. She has been texting me a lot recently, I hope she’s doing okay.”

“I guess we should find out.”

Lexi pulls off her hairnet and apron and follows Lottie back out into the bar. The scene she’s met with sends her brain into overdrive. Hope leans over the bar, sipping on her drink, laughing at something Lucas has said. She reaches a hand up to rest on his arm momentarily. There’s no skirting around the fact that Lexi is a jealous kind of person, not especially so, but certainly enough to be uneasy about the scene in front of her. When his lips had been on hers and his hands on her body only hours before. And Hope had Noah anyway, why did she need to go after Lucas? Not that Hope knew that Lucas was kind of Lexi’s man. Or anyone knew, for that matter. Lottie squeezes Lexi’s hand briefly, as though she knows what she’s thinking. It’s odd, but Lexi doesn’t have time to to question it as it’s comforting, and they’re already walking over to Hope and Lucas. 

Of course Hope has no idea about Lexi and Lucas, but it still really stings to see her flirt with him so openly. And he’s not exactly turning her down either, he’s smiling along and chatting with her. It’s fairly quiet, so he’s got the time to chat with her. Lexi isn’t sure what to say, Lucas and Hope haven’t noticed them coming towards them yet, and she can’t exactly act jealous for various reasons. They’re not actually together or anything, Lucas is technically a single guy, plus, they can’t let anyone know that they’re not-together-just-whatever. 

“Hey babes, we’ve got about ten minutes,” Lottie slides into the stool beside Hope, and Lexi falls into the one beside her. Lucas meets Lexi’s eyes and gives a coy smile.

“I’ll leave you guys to it,” he says, moving to the middle of the bar so he is open to serve anyone. Luckily for him, there’s no one about.

“Hey!” Hope jumps up to hug Lexi, then plops back into her stool at the end. 

“You okay?” Lexi asks.

“I wanted to chat to you guys, I feel like we’ve gotten pretty close recently, and obviously you’re friends with Noah…” she sips her drink, looking downtrodden.

“Go on…” Lottie hums hesitantly.

“He wanted to take a break.” Hope’s face is completely fallen, her eyebrows slanting down at the same angle as the corner of her lips. She’s wearing nicely done makeup: smooth red lipstick and sunset coloured eyeshadow, but underneath she looks tired. 

“What? How come?” Lexi is surprised, obviously Hope didn’t seem the type to openly flirt with Lucas while seeing Noah, but they had seemed so happy at Halloween.

“I kind of fell too hard too fast. Got a bit possessive and obsessive over him. He’s more of a relaxed kind of guy, you know? He said he needed time away from me to think about it all,” Hope slumps her cheek into her hand.

“Oh,” Lottie says, not sure what to say.

“I’m sorry, Hope,” comforts Lexi.

“Have you guys heard anything from him or? I don’t know, is he okay?” Asks Hope.

“I think so. He’s not the most talkative guy anyway but the last I checked he’s okay,” Lexi says.

“Well, I guess that’s good. I’m just not really sure what to do. I really like him but maybe it was time we cooled off a bit.”

“It sounds like that was a good decision. The time away can make you decide what it is you really want,” Lottie adds.

“On another note,” Hope lowers her voice, “Lucas has really piqued my interest. Maybe I oughta start trying to see what’s about.”

“Oh?” Lottie raises an eyebrow.

“Should I ask him out?” She giggles, her eyes going wide. Lexi’s stomach tightens. _No. No you shouldn’t. Because I want to go out with him_. 

“Yeah, why not,” Lexi says, internally kicking herself but knowing she should support her friend, and she can’t reveal that she likes Lucas now that everyone thinks Bobby is in the picture. And Hope seemed so downcast about Noah, too, maybe it would cheer her up. Hopefully Lucas would turn her down, though. Lexi makes a mental note to check in with Noah when she gets a chance.

“I don’t know, babe. I think you should wait it out. You don’t know what Noah’s going to do. He might come back to you, and either way I’m not sure I can see you with Lucas,” Lottie adds. She looks over at Lexi quickly before turning back to Hope.

“Oh. Why not?”

“Because in all the time I’ve worked here I’ve never seen him show interest in any women, he’s too much of a workaholic.”

“That’s a shame. I might just try getting his number anyway.”

“Do you think he seems interested?” Lexi asks, trying to not seem too intrigued.

“I don’t know, but there’s no harm in trying right? And I think it would be a good way to figure out if I really want Noah or not.”

“My advice would be to lay off, babe. It’s still quite fresh with Noah after all,” Lottie presses.

Lexi turns to look at Lucas. Would he go out with Hope? She’s absolutely gorgeous, she’s charismatic, kind, funny. It would be an idiot who’d pass her up in favour of Lexi. Lexi wasn’t really insecure at all, but she could see by the rap sheet of the two girls that logically Hope was the better option. Especially for someone like Lucas who was extravagant and liked to show a girl off. 

But, whatever was going on between them, he had after all shown that he liked Lexi to some extent. Was he the sort of guy to date multiple women at once? Maybe, she’s not sure. Or perhaps he’d agree to a date with Hope on the basis of keeping his tryst with Lexi undercover. Probably not, if he can’t even have time to see Lexi properly he’s not going to go to all the effort of going on some kind of cover-up date with Hope. 

Regardless, she’s getting ahead of herself, Lexi thinks, they’ve not even really talked about what’s going on between them, and plus, this is only the second time that Lucas and Hope have even met. _That didn’t stop you_ , a small voice at the back of Lexi’s head crops up, but she tries to ignore it. There was no connection between Lucas and Hope, right? But as she thinks this she notices Hope catching Lucas’ eye and shooting him a cheeky grin. He smiles warmly back, but it’s not exactly flirty.

Lucas has been eavesdropping on the girls’ conversation. His heart sinks when he hears Lexi tell Hope that she should ask him out. Does this mean Lexi actually isn’t that interested in him? Sure, he’d told her to keep whatever it was going on between them under wraps, but she could’ve found some other way to throw Hope off the scent than basically offering him up for the date. But then she’d asked Hope if she thought Lucas seemed interested, and there had been a very slight rush to the question that made Lucas think perhaps she was worried about it. Which was equal parts comforting and amusing. It was cute. She was cute. And she was… kind of his now? Well, he’s still figuring it out but that’s the goal right? 

Oh. _Oh_. No. In all his happiness to finally be able to be… whatever he was with Lexi, he’d completely forgotten about poor Bobby. _Shit_. He wasn’t this guy. Especially not to a man who actually - was really nice. He had to talk to Lexi, and hope to god there’s an explanation for this. He thinks about seeing them together at Halloween, and suddenly everything that’s happened over the last couple of days fills him with guilt. Or seeing them together on social media, or Bobby walking her home each week after the bar. But Lexi wasn’t the type, surely? To cheat? He had to think of a way to talk about this with her, to figure out what’s going on between them and how it effects Bobby.

The girls continue to talk until their break is over, and they go back to get ready for the rest of their shifts. 

“I’m sorry about Hope, babe,” Lottie sighs as they enter the staff room.

“What? Why are you sorry?” Lexi blurts, feeling a little weirded out by Lottie’s behaviour tonight. 

“Because she’s into Lucas,” says Lottie as though it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 

“I’m not sure I understand what you mean…” Lexi lies with unease. 

“Well, because you two are… whatever.”

“What? You know about me and Lucas?” She’d not been expecting this at all. Lottie wasn’t usually one to keep her mouth shut about anything, let alone a juicy secret like this. So does that mean she only knows about Lexi’s crush or, did she know the rest too?

“Oh my god, of course I know,” she laughs. “It’s so obvious.”

“What?! Why did you never say anything?”

“I figured if you wanted me to know, you’d tell me,” Lottie shrugs. And this whole time Lexi has thought she’d been so sly, but Lottie has figured it all out. Not to mention, had kept it shtum out of respect for Lexi’s privacy. The love she has for Lottie right now skyrockets.

“How long?” Asks Lexi. 

“The whole time? You were flirting for the entirety of your trial shift and then the next time I saw you you didn’t say two words to each other. I figured you must’ve shagged. Also my tea leaves told me the day of your trial shift that there was romance in the air and it certainly wasn’t mine,” she explains.

“Oh. Wow. Thanks for not saying anything.”

“Obviously. What kind of a friend would I be otherwise. Why else do you think I drank during Never Have I Ever?” Lottie laughs at the memory.

“What?! You did that for me?” So Lottie had been looking out for Lexi in ways she didn’t even know about. Without witness, without reward.

“Duh. Me and Gary hadn’t actually shagged yet at that point. We were taking it steady. I had to nudge him and make him drink.”

“You’re talking only past tense, so you have now?” Smirks Lexi.

“Of course.”

“Lottie I had no idea you’d done so much for me,” she pulls her into a hug, Lottie stiffens but eventually hugs her back. “Thank you.”

“No problem, anything for my girls. Especially you. But now that it’s out there, there’s a few conversations we need to have. Like, what the fuck is going on with Bobby? And, why are you and Lucas so creepily smiley today?” She recoils thinking about it.

“Okay,” Lexi laughs, “I’ll call you tonight and we can talk through it all. Right now we’ve got to get back to work.”

“Roger,” Lottie mocks a salute and grins before she goes back through to the bar.

Lexi smiles to herself as she puts back on her apron and hairnet. Things are going well. Lottie has her back entirely, and whatever was happening with Lucas was enough to set her smile as a permanent fixture.


	24. Noah ‘Pologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucas and Lexi discuss the nights’ events, but Lucas gets a frog in his throat. Lexi finally reaches out to Noah.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Keep On Loving You - Cigarettes After Sex  
> Different - The Academic  
> Make It To Christmas - Alessia Cara

After work, Lexi steps out in her coat to the main bar with Lottie. There Lucas is sitting on a barstool, writing on some paper. She notices the slight tell of his crinkled brow which indicates something about what he’s doing is causing him stress. Lottie reaches out to squeeze Lexi’s arm and give her a reassuring smile, before going to leave. Lexi is incredibly thankful to have someone in the know, especially someone as supportive as Lottie.

“See you guys tomorrow,” Lottie calls out as she exits the bar with a witchy swish. Lexi slowly makes her way over to the bar, and slips into the stool next to Lucas’.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” he smiles, but there still seems to be something bothering him. 

They both go to speak at the same time, then laugh, and Lucas motions for Lexi to start.

“So uh,” she’s blushing a bit, “how was Hope?”

He knows exactly what she’s angling for. She wants to know if Lucas gave Hope his number. Hope had asked him just before she’d left. But he kind of wants to see Lexi sweat a little.

“She seems okay. Very friendly,” Lucas shrugs smugly.

“Yeah, right, so did she—was she—uh did she say anything weird to you?” She fiddles with her earring.

“Like what?”

Lexi is blushing furiously now. “She told me and Lottie that she was going to ask for your number. Did she? Did you give her it?” She kind of rushes the questions out.

He laughs at the look on her face. “Why? Would that bother you? Are you jealous?”

“You’ve every right to be doing whatever you want with whoever you want. It’s not my business. I’m just curious,” she straightens her chin out.

Lucas reaches in to lightly brush her cheek with the back of his hand.

“No. I didn’t give her my number.”

Lexi can’t hide the smile which starts to creep out. She leans into his hand a little.

“Cool. What was it you were going to say?”

“Oh, right,” Lucas hesitates. He doesn’t quite know how to breach the topic, and he’s afraid he might be making a big deal out of nothing. “Um, well, I guess I just-“ but oh god, he didn’t even know what him and Lexi were? They hadn’t even defined their relationship or anything, what if him asking about Bobby came off as possessive and presumptuous? What if Bobby knows and is completely okay with it? After all, Bobby seemed like he was the sort of guy who would be okay with an open relationship. Given his track record, anyway. What if they weren’t even _in_ any sort of relationship?

If he asks Lexi about her relationship with Bobby, maybe it would prompt her to ask Lucas what _their_ relationship was. And he isn’t sure he’s ready to answer that question. Although he’d decided that okay, he was going to enjoy his time with her, something like a full on relationship still scared the shit out of him. Mostly for the same reasons as ever, he would worry about work and his father. But also because he’s still trying to work on being less jealous and he’s so petrified of scaring Lexi away with it. Lexi wasn’t someone who took well to being treated like a commodity. For now, he wanted them to continue how they were. Relaxed, with no pressures. As long as Lexi seems okay with it. And maybe that means he needs to be okay with Bobby being in her life too. Even though that would spark some seriously jealousy in him. He’s completely at war with himself over whether or not he should say something. He decides against it, he needs more time to think about it. Truth is, there’s a small part of him not guilty at all for hurting Bobby if it means he’s finally getting the girl. And selfishly, he doesn’t know how he’d answer the follow-ups. 

“It’s nothing. I’m just happy,” he says. Lexi smiles up at him and leans over to kiss his cheek. It’s quick and nervous, but it feels intimate.

“Good. I should probably head out,” she says, trying to ignore the tempting voice at the back of her mind convincing her to take him home. _No. Whatever this is, it is delicate and to be handled with care_.

—-

When Lexi finally arrives home, she pulls off her shoes and slumps into her bedroom, after reading a little Note on the coffee table written by Chelsea.

**‘Gone to bed – so tired! There’s some microwave mac &cheese in the fridge if you’re hungry xx p.s. I saw Bobby leave this morning!’**

Chelsea always liked to leave notes for Lexi, another cute quirk Lexi loved about her. Her writing is curly and neat, and she’s written on a pink heart-shaped post-it. She’s actually grateful to see the bit about Bobby, as it gives her an alibi for the night which doesn’t involve Lucas. She’s so scared that any kind of pressure on that would immediately break it, so it needs to stay as private and pure as possible for now.

She changes almost immediately into her pyjamas, still tired from staying up the night before then sleeping through the day. She tells herself that she’ll text Noah about Hope tomorrow, and she’ll let Lottie know they should talk tomorrow too. It’s been an eventful couple of days.

 **Lexi** : i promise i’ll tell u everything tomorrow, i’m about to pass out 

**Lottie** : you better

And with that, Lexi drops off to sleep.

—-

The morning finds Lexi awoken by Chelsea carrying a bowl of chopped fruit. She’s in her dressing gown and her hair is wet from the shower. Chelsea tended to be an early riser, and always earlier than Lexi due to the fact that her job was more of a 9 to 5. Her silhouette is soft in the barely illuminated bedroom.

“Morning sleepyhead! I brought you breakfast in bed,”she sings, as Lexi groans through a stretch. 

“Thanks, babe,” she yawns as she sits up in her bed, lights being switched on by Chelsea. It’s raining out and the sound patters against her window, a small streak of grey sky visible in between her closed curtains. Chelsea perches on the bed next to Lexi and passes over the bowl of fruit.

“Merry Christmas!” Chelsea enthuses. For all the time they’d lived together, each December 1st Chelsea and Lexi would decorate their flat for Christmas. This is because Chelsea adores Christmas, but Lexi wouldn’t let her do anything until it turned December. Lexi chuckles.

“Don’t you have work today?”

“Nope! I made sure I booked it off weeks ago. And it’s… currently 8:30 so we have approximately six hours before you need to leave.”

“Alright, alright,” Lexi says through a mouthful of watermelon. “I’ve got to text Noah before we do anything though, and Lottie.”

“Why?”

“Hope came to the bar last night. They’re on a break or something,” she’s about to say something about Hope flirting with Lucas, but is afraid of Chelsea’s sympathy and having to pretty much lie to her about Lexi and Lucas. Even though she sort of already was lying, it didn’t feel so bad if it was simply left unsaid.

“Oh em gee what! I thought they seemed solid, what happened?” Chelsea gasps.

“I’m not entirely sure, hence why I need to text Noah,” Lexi explains. Chelsea nods sagely, then Lexi hands Chelsea a cube of honeydew melon, which she takes and pops in her mouth. They sit and eat their fruit while discussing Hope and Noah’s relationship, what little they knew about it and what they thought might be the flaws. After finishing the bowl, Chelsea takes it from Lexi and jumps up to collect the Christmas decorations from their dusty, small supply cupboard, leaving Lexi to text Noah.

 **Lexi** : hey you ok?

Noah didn’t really check his phone all that much, so Lexi isn’t expecting an immediate reply. However, one comes sooner than anticipated.

 **Noah** : I’m okay, thanks Lexi.

Classic Noah. Man of few words afraid to upset people with his true feelings. Lexi and he were actually pretty close, as far as close friends went with Noah, anyway.

 **Lexi** : wanna talk about it?

 **Noah** : Oh, has Hope talked to you then?

 **Lexi** : ohhh ye dude why didn’t u say anything

 **Noah** : I didn’t think it really mattered. I wasn’t really expecting Hope to tell you.  
**Noah** : Is it just you?

 **Lexi** : and lottie  
**Lexi** : she came to see us at the bar  
**Lexi** : and I told chels this morning

 **Noah** : Oh, sorry. 

**Lexi** : don’t be, we’re still mates even if you barely come out w us, and hope’s our friend now too, not ur fault she came  
**Lexi** : so you wanna tell me what’s up or nah

 **Noah** : She can just be a bit much. Rahim thinks I should just dump her, but I do like her.

 **Lexi** : she’s sweet and cute but only u know how the relationship makes you feel and idk much about rahim but from u it sounds like he’s not exactly the guy to ask about women

 **Noah** : Yeah, you’re probably right.  
**Noah** : It would be nice to see you soon, anyway.

 **Lexi** : definitely, call or text whenever and i’ll let u know

 **Noah** : Thanks, Lexi.

Well, she isn’t sure that conversation was exactly illuminating, but perhaps he could tell her more when they meet up. Next on the list was Lottie. She could lie to her as she was everyone else, but she felt the need to have at least one confidant, and Lottie had proven she wouldn’t be going round telling everyone. She calls Lottie.

“Hey.”

“Ugh, took you long enough. I’ve been waiting for the tea all day, and not the kind with readable leaves!” Lottie moans.

“Lottie it’s like 9am, you’ve had to wait 10 hours at most,” Lexi chuckles.

“Whatever, just spill it.”

“Well, there’s nothing going on with me and Bobby.”

There’s a pause at the other end of the line. “I don’t believe that one bit,” says Lottie after a beat.

“It’s true! The night I got moved to the bar he suggested we start a bit of a flirtationship to see if I could make Lucas jealous, and that’s it really.”

“So the whole things been fake? Girl, I’ve seen the way you look at each other.”

Lexi brushes over the jolt this sends through her stomach. 

“Yeah, it’s an act. But it obviously worked. Lucas has never paid me so much attention, and i don’t know now we’re…”

“What?”

“Well we kissed the other night. That’s what, but aside from that I’m not really sure,” Lexi twists her mouth up in lack of confidence and Lottie can hear it in her voice.

“Oh, wow. I mean, congrats on the kiss I guess but, what about Bobby?” Lottie doesn’t sound overly excited about the revelation. Maybe it was because she’d already figured everything else out it didn’t seem like such a big deal to her as it did to Lexi.

“What _about_ Bobby?” Lexi emphasises the preposition.

“Well does he know?”

“Yeah, he came by afterwards.”

Lottie scoffs on the other side of the line. Lexi isn’t sure why Lottie seems so interested in what role Bobby plays in it all, but she lets it slide. Lexi tells her the rest, details and all, before they say good bye and hang up.

Lexi and Chelsea spend the day decorating and dancing around the apartment to Christmas songs. It’s nice just to bask in each other’s company and feel the joy so often associated with festivities. About halfway through they make hot chocolate and Priya comes round to enjoy a cup with them. She can’t stay long since she has a client, but it’s nice all the same. By the time Lexi’s ready to head off to work, the house looks suitably festive and happy in the most stylish way, thanks to Chelsea’s interior decorator skills. They have a green fake tree, because Chelsea can’t _stand_ those fancy boring coloured trees. (When Lexi first met her, she’d been expecting her to be a pink tree girl through-and-though, so this was initially a surprise. But it makes sense). The ornament on top is a plastic star with a picture of Chelsea and Lexi inside it, and colourful fairy lights adorn the flat.

Lexi grows increasingly guilty as the day goes on for not telling Chelsea the truth. She is her best friend, and Lottie knew now too, she just couldn’t bear to say something and then for it all to be thrown back in her face. If Lucas decides tomorrow he’s over it, which she honestly wouldn’t be at all surprised about, and she’s told Chelsea everything – the pain of it all being some over-exaggeration or one sided would be disastrous. And although when you tell her to, Chelsea does keep a secret, it just felt like it made it real by telling her. And in making it real, in came all the complications.

And there were many complications. One freckled, grinning complication in particular keeps cropping up in her head.


	25. December 25th

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s Christmas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Shake up Christmas - Train  
> Christmas Lights - Coldplay  
> Like It’s Christmas - Jonas Brothers

The week goes by like a dream, Lexi and Lucas stealing innocent kisses and maybe some not-so-innocent gropes at every chance they get, feeling like teenagers sneaking around out of fear of their parents’ reactions. Lexi is on a high of being able to spend time with the man she’s been pining over for so long, even if most of that time is physical based and not emotional. Everything is suggesting that it really is time to be getting into the festive spirit, and things couldn’t be going better in Lexi’s life at this point.

Before she knows it, it’s Friday again and Lexi has just started her walk home with Bobby after work. They meander down the streets side by side as always, festive street lights illuminating small pools of water and reflecting off their faces as they pass them. Despite the clamorous air around the Central London streets of the hour, Lexi and Bobby find their own little bubble blocking it all out. Instead they find calm in the business and quiet in the noise. It’s nice.

“You look completely smitten,” Bobby teases. He’s been asking her about Lucas at every opportunity, his obsession confusing the hell out of him. For some reason he just needs to know every detail about what’s going on between them, even though now technically his job is done. Not that he’d mentioned that, either. It’s like a car crash: he doesn’t _want_ to know but he has to. Truth be told he is enjoying it far too much to stop now, so he figures by not pointing out that he’s technically fulfilled his duty he can prolong it.

They have fun together, and Bobby loves being able to talk to someone about nothing and everything where they still challenge him and his silly quips but also secretly love it. Lucas still doesn’t talk to him, instead looking not-so-happily out of the corner of his eye in the same way Bobby is used to by now. But he doesn’t mind. He actually thinks Lucas a decent guy, and totally understands why he is a little icy with Bobby.

She shrugs a shoulder, “Good luck I guess. I do owe you for helping make this happen.”

“Damn right you do!” He booms, a toothy grin on his face. He’s proud to be able to do some good, even if it does give him a strange feeling in his stomach that he can’t quite place.

“So what would you like? How can I owe you?” She asks, an odd sincerity in her voice and face. 

“A smile will do.”

And it’s broken with an eye roll.

“Oh you couldn’t sound worse if you tried. We both know my forced smile is not something anyone wants to see.”

“How about thinking about how happy you are to be with me right now, that’ll put a smile on your face.”

She goes to protest but actually laughs instead, falling right into the trap. She’s so happy with how everything’s going, she can’t deny that this does feel nice, too. Something about Bobby always manages to brighten her up.

“There it is,” he says, watching her with a sort of warmth tinged by sadness. Her smile, he has trouble admitting to himself, is one of the most stunning and instantly joy-bringing things he’s ever seen. His eyes sparkle in the dark December cold, hands twitching in his coat pockets because they want to be elsewhere.

She rolls her eyes again at his words and gives him a gentle shove with her shoulder. The contact is a mistake, as they both move a little away again.

They ride the tube all the way to Lexi’s as usual, and start to walk to her flat block. After a nervous cough, Lexi starts talking.

“So uh, look. Here’s the thing. If you’re up for it, of course. I need you to keep being my fake… thing,” she explains with her hands.

“But why? You got the guy?” questions Bobby, a little confused, and kind of regretting asking.

“Well, we’re not actually anything right now. And whatever it is we are, we have to keep on the down-low because of the business and his dad and whatever it was he said. And also uh, my friends like you and it’s just easier to have a cover story for late nights and things like that. There’s no pressure though. If you’re done with it I completely understand. I don’t expect you to do any more favours for me. Quite frankly you’ve done more than enough,” Lexi explains. There’s actually a part of her that isn’t ready for this to end yet either, it feels like a safety blanket. She knows if Bobby were to refuse she would feel foreignly disappointed. She tries not to look too wide eyed as she glances at him.

“I’ll do it. As long as you actually do promise to owe me this time,” he smirks. He doesn’t actually know why he’s agreeing to this again, he just knows that something in his gut is telling him to say yes. Something is convincing him that it’ll be better this way, more fun, more intrigue. He wants the excuse to spend time with her.

She breaks into a wide grin. “Deal.” She’s more grateful at him agreeing than she’d expected.

“I want 5 requests,” he demands, holding up five fingers.

“Okay.”

“The first is you agree to be my friend,” he grins smugly. There’s no way she can deny him now.

She rolls her eyes. “I guess you’ve sort of earned that by now.” She can’t really safely say at this point she still dislikes Bobby. That would be more pointless denial given that he’d already done so much for her.

“Score! The rest I’ll save for a rainy day,” he grins and stuffs his hands back in his pockets.

“Bet you’ll end up using them in one go.”

“Nah. I’m the king of patience. I can play the long game.”

She raises an eyebrow at this and considers him. After all, by now they’d been at this a while and he certainly wasn’t what she had assumed at first. Sure, he was incredibly flirty, and had been sleeping around still, but he had never once tried to sleep with Lexi. She finds herself feeling guilty for making judgements about his character before really getting to know him.

And an odd feeling of… regret? Is she… offended that he hadn’t tried to get into her pants? She brushes off the thought with a clearing of her throat.

As usual, Bobby walks her to her door, and sends her off with a wave and a joke goodbye. She settles into bed that night with a smile on her face which definitely doesn’t have anything to do with Bobby McKenzie.

—-

In mid-December Lucas has to go to a conference with his father in Sheffield, and Lexi finds herself missing him every day. Their relationship isn’t really the kind where she feels she can just text him all the time, or that he’d even respond, so she simply misses him in silence for a long weekend. 

Bobby comes ‘round at the insistence of Chelsea and they continue watching _Gilmore Girls_ (a particular focus on the festive episodes), plus a couple of classic Christmas movies like _Love, Actually_ and _The Holiday_ , this time also with the addition of Priya. The girls sit on the couch and Bobby sits on the floor in front of them with a bowl of popcorn. Every now and again Bobby would reach behind him to pull on the bottom of Lexi’s jeans to make a point about whatever was going on in the show, which Lexi would complain about and kick him lightly in the head. At one point, Bobby just holds Lexi’s foot, and it’s weird, but there’s also this intimacy about it which feels… strange. But not bad strange. Lexi doesn’t try to kick away, just lets her chest jitter as he draws circles on the top of her foot. Bobby tells them he’s leaving soon to spend Christmas in Scotland with his family. Lexi realises she’ll be sorry to see him go.

They watch for hours before everyone is yawning and ready for bed. Chelsea and Priya see Bobby start to leave and are confused as to why. Because of course, to them, Lexi and he have shared a bed many a time.

—-

Just after Lucas is back from his trip, there’s an office Christmas party, which mostly consists of Lottie and Lexi drinking mulled wine on the sidelines and complaining about all the employees they’ve never met or barely talk to.

“That’s Siobhan, apparently,” Lottie says offhand as a woman leaves the conversation, the tinsel crown wobbling on her head, “ _Apparently_ she’s been working here years.”

“Honestly sometimes it feels like you, me, and Lucas are the only ones here.”

“Right?”

Sarah, after two months off work, is able to make it to the office party. She spends the night dancing and swinging her neck in a way that probably should not be swung after an injury. They never did find a good replacement for Lexi, but she supposes now that Sarah’s back it doesn’t matter. At one point Lucas and Lexi are able to sneak away from prying eyes for a secret smooch, and she even manages to convince him to wear a tasteful pair of reindeer antlers, but soon enough the party is over and everyone is heading home.

—-

On the 23rd December, AKA the last day Koh’s is open for a couple of days, Lottie leaves Lucas and Lexi to speak alone at the end of the shift. She would be seeing Lexi tomorrow, anyway. Lexi has taken a week off work post Christmas so she can visit her parents, so this is the last time she will be seeing Lucas for a while. They stand in the main bar area, lights dim and smelling of lemon scented antibacterial floor cleaner. 

“I, uh, have something for you,” Lucas says as they hear the door shut from Lottie’s exit. They’re both already dressed to leave, Lucas wearing a smart black thigh-length coat over his shirt and slacks. Lexi wears her usual long camel coat. She’s taken aback by Lucas’s statement, she hadn’t even thought about exchanging gifts with him for whatever reason.

“Oh. I wasn’t expecting- I didn’t get you anything I’m-“

“It’s okay,” he chuckles. “I don’t need anything. I’m quite happy with what I’ve got,” he smiles down at her, and pulls out her hand so it’s facing palm up. His left hand holds underneath it tenderly, and his right comes forward to place a small square box in hers. It’s purple and has a silver clasp. Her eyes widen and she looks up at Lucas.

“Lucas you really shouldn’t have.” She’s kind of terrified about the contents of the box. They aren’t even a couple yet Lucas had bought her a gift for Christmas? And an expensive looking one at that.

“It’s not a big deal. I just saw it and thought of you. And trust me, it wasn’t expensive either. I figured you’d throw a fit if it cost too much,” he chuckles. Lexi can feel herself breathing a sigh of relief. _Thank god_. Expensive gifts feel like a lot of pressure.

She laughs. “I absolutely would, but I’m not entirely sure our ideas of not expensive are the same.”

He takes his hands away from hers. “Take a look.”

She hesitantly pulls open the box with her other hand, revealing the soft velvety purple cushion inside and a silver necklace. It’s got a very fine chain and the pendant is a small crescent moon. It’s simple and understated, exactly the type of thing Lexi adores. There’s a small card in the lid of the box which reads ‘Handmade in Sheffield’ and then the name of the shop below. He must’ve picked it up while he was on his business trip.

“It’s from a little independent jewellery store, I know how you feel about expensive chains and designers,” he blushes slightly as she stares down at the gift, waiting for her reaction. She is surprised at the fact that he takes note of so much about her; offhand comments to Lottie he’d really listened to.

“Lucas this is, this is lovely. Thank you so much.” She breaks into a wide smile.

“I’m glad you like it,” he beams.

“I should’ve got you something.”

“Don’t be silly, like I said, I have all I need,” he strokes her cheek with his thumb before looking up at the ceiling above him. “There’s no mistletoe but…”

Lexi laughs and leans in to kiss him. It’s light and short, but sweet all the same. She pulls the necklace out of the box, before tucking the box away in her bag neatly.

“Here, let me.” Lucas holds out a hand for the necklace, which Lexi hands him. She turns and holds her hair up out of the way, since it’s short it’s only a minor movement. Lucas pulls an arm around her front to place the necklace at her neckline, and she can feel the inches of distance between her body and his arms. He doesn’t fumble with the clasp at all, smoothly fastening it round Lexi’s neck and his hands brushing against hers which holds up her hair. His ease makes her wonder how many times he’s done this to women in his pre-work days. She tries not to think about it too much. It isn’t those days anymore, they don’t matter.

“Thanks,” she looks back to him with an unbreakable smile, it’s all so good.

They share a rather steamy kiss before going their separate ways for the holidays. The truth is, ever since this had started they hadn’t yet slept together again. Both are afraid that it might be too far a line to cross and end whatever they have going on. Although they both really, really want to. 

There’s something to be said about the fact that Lexi—selfless and giving Lexi who’d bought flowers for a colleague she barely knew (or, asked Chelsea to buy them because she didn’t have time)—hadn’t even thought to buy Lucas a Christmas gift. Maybe it said too much, and she didn’t want to push her boundaries. And sure, she had only bought gifts for the girls, but—

But for some reason, she feels guilty all the same.

—-

When December 24th rolls around Lexi, Chelsea, and Priya have their own Christmas before heading home to spend Christmas Day with their families. Chelsea and Lexi had also planned to spend a just under a week down visiting their respective families; Lexi in Brighton, and Chelsea in Buckinghamshire, before coming back to London for New Years. Lottie comes round to spend the day with them, too, Hannah and Hope having already gone their separate ways for the holidays. 

Lexi has pre-prepped most of the food, so isn’t too taken up by cooking in the morning. Instead they gather around hers and Chelsea’s tree, the latter squeeing excitedly at the presents neatly wrapped underneath. They all wear their pyjamas - it’s tradition.

It’s easy to spot who has wrapped each gift. Lexi’s wrapping paper is covered in cute festive animals, Chelsea’s is glittery, Priya’s is mirrored gold, and Lottie’s is a matte black.

They open their gifts to a Christmas playlist, Chelsea making sure to jump up and provide more Buck’s Fizz when necessary. They’d agreed not to spend too much on one another, so it’s a flurry of pretty jewellery and makeup and nice alcohol. Once they’re all open—or, they think so—Priya notices four not-so-neatly wrapped gifts stuffed right back to the base of the tree.

“What are these?” She pulls them out and sets them between everyone. They’re all box shaped.

“Santa came!!” Chelsea beams, picking up one of the gifts and flipping it in her hands, “this ones for me!”

She makes no hesitation to dig right into it, and reveals a nice looking bottle of Pink Grapefruit Gin. Chelsea looks up at the girls wide-eyed.

“It wasn’t us,” Lottie says uneasily, turning her head between Priya and Lexi who are shrugging and looking at the gift like it might explode any minute.

“Well I know it wasn’t you. It was Santa.”

Lottie laughs, until she sees the serious look on Chelsea’s face and clears her throat. Lexi tries not to giggle too hard to herself, Chelsea sure is convincing.

“You guys!” She finally relents, “I’m not stupid. There’s a note right here,” she spins the bottle round so they all can see the pink post-it note, “it’s from Bobby. He must’ve snuck them in when he came round.”

“Oh my god,” grins Priya, “Lexi’s man bought us all gifts? He’s a keeper.” She reaches out to see which is hers and pulls it towards herself.

Lottie raises a smug eyebrow in Lexi’s direction which she promptly avoids.

Priya’s present is a box of boozy chocolates, and Lottie’s is a bottle of Glenfiddich which she rolls her eyes at but cradles close-by. She mutters something about selling whisky all evening, but there’s no real annoyance behind it. They don’t tell Lexi what their notes say.

Finally, Lexi reaches over to unwrap her present. She’s a little nervous. She reaches the box and starts to open it… to reveal something which makes her burst out laughing.

“What?” Lottie asks.

“It’s a Christmas tree ornament,” she snorts, and the other girls look between themselves confused. “In the shape of a bike!”

“What?”

“Is he picking on you?” Chelsea’s face suddenly scrunches up, “because you can’t ride a bike??”

Lexi smiles at her friends defence, she even looks cute angry. “No. I don’t think so.” But she bites her lip as she reads the note attached:

_**Don’t throw it at me. It marks the start of our ‘relationship’ ;)** _

—-

The girls stuff themselves silly on food, before slumping on the sofa to watch the shitty Christmas movies playing. It reminds Lexi of the time earlier in the month Bobby had been there. She sort of wishes he was there now, to pull on her jeans and bug her with questions. 

Chelsea cries when they part that evening to make their way to their hometowns, but they’ll all be back together soon enough.

Lexi makes it home safely, happy to see her parents and much younger brother for the first time since her birthday. She’d always been close with her family, even if she’s terrible at contacting them.

A little into Christmas dinner, Bobby texts. Lexi ignores the excitement at opening her messages. There’s been an odd tenderness and unrelenting appreciation for him since he’d agreed to continue their thing. Or perhaps it’s that she is now allowing herself to act like his friend.

 **Bobby** : HAPPY CHRISTMAS🥳🥳😍👄🤯🎁🎄

 **Lexi** : yeah, tidings greetings and all that🦑

While she’s there she texts out festive wishes to all the girls and Noah and family members not with them today.

In all the hubbub of the month of December, Lexi still hasn’t managed to arrange to meet up with Noah, and he and Hope still seem to be on the outs. She vows to herself that come new year, she would see him. And that, she certainly would.

She looks a moment at Lucas’ contact. Does she text? He might not even reply. She doesn’t even feel like she needs a ‘Merry Christmas’ wish from him. Perhaps because she’s so used to him not giving her those kinds of things. She doesn’t send anything. He texts a little later, anyway.

 **Lucas** : Merry Christmas.

 **Lexi** : merry christmas🎄🦌

She feels like she should say something else. But isn’t sure what. And then she eyes up the text stream below with Bobby, guilt filling her as she wants to continue texting him but not Lucas. _What does this mean?_ And sends something else.

 **Lexi** : oh and thanks for the gift, I really appreciate it  
**Lexi** : seriously, have a good one – yeah? i’ll see you at new years  
**Lexi** : i need you in one piece

 **Bobby** : you too. i’ll be my charming fully intact self as usual😉

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So everyone - Merry Christmas!! And if you don’t celebrate, happy holidays and I hope December’s been treating you well. Also, thanks for sticking with me for over 4 months now amazing people❤️


	26. A Whole New Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s New Year’s Eve and the gang have a party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hey everyone! You may or may not know already, but to anyone that doesn’t: just before Christmas I somehow lost my entire document of WOYL which had 37 full chapters plus additional scenes to be added later on. I’ve tried all I can to get it back and it’s a lost cause. So, all chapters moving forward have been completely rewritten to the best of my memory and I’m very nervous that I’ve lost the quality of my original writing, but there’s not much else I can do. I’m sorry this isn’t what it was meant to be!
> 
> And a huge thanks to Sarah veritas_11 for looking over this for me!!💚
> 
> Chapter Playlist:  
> Animal - Neon Trees  
> Cola - Camelphat  
> Nothing Breaks Like A Heart - Miley Cyrus, Mark Ronson

Priya, Lexi, and Chelsea are all slumped on Lexi’s bed, trying to last minute plan their New Year’s Eve party. They’d already invited everyone, but they’re going through it all to make sure it’s all going to go smoothly. It’s early in the morning, and the girls have only just got back from their Christmas break at home, so everyone’s tired and a little stressed at how soon they need to play host. The cold winter sun shines through the window and onto a spot on the bed, right where the paper copy of their planning list lies.

“Hold on,” says Priya, “Why is Lucas on here? Aren’t you over him now?”

“We’re still… friends I guess. It would be rude not to invite him,”  _ god I wish I could tell them,  _ “Anyway, you invited Felix from Halloween so you can’t talk,” Lexi chuckles. The memory of the obnoxious blue-haired boy is still front and centre in all their minds.  _ Shudder. _

“He’s fun! Lucas just stands in the corner nursing a drink,” Priya sneers a little in disapproval.

“Now girls, come on, it’s going to be fun!! I’m hoping for a midnight kiss!” Chelsea makes a kissy face, eliciting a laugh from the others.

“Who, though?”

“I don’t know. There’s someone nice at work. But didn’t you say all Bobby’s friends were fit?” 

Lexi laughs, “I guess. Chels, you can pull anyone. Just don’t forget I’m your backup,” she winks.

Her friend beams at this.

“What about you, Priya? Noah’s on the market again.”

“Oh, hell no. I wouldn’t do that to Hope.”

Chelsea nods sagely.

Once the girls have looked over their lists another hundred times, and checked the RSVP’s, they get ready to add some gold, silver, and black decoration on top of the Christmas stuff to emanate a more classy NYE vibe.

Chelsea makes their famous punch again, of which she’ll tell everyone the ‘secret’ ingredients to when she’s had too much.

The girls spend the day getting themselves ready—these things take time. Well, it’s mostly Priya and Lexi giving their opinions on Chelsea’s outfit options, but they have a great time. Lexi cooks them a light dinner so they don’t bloat uncomfortably, and they all start to doll themselves up to party music. Priya wears a long-sleeved gold playsuit, complete with a pretty, loose up-do and sparkly eyeshadow. And, of course, her signature red lip. Chelsea wears a metallic silver cowl neck dress which hugs her curves, her hair in those space buns she loves so much, and iridescent silver toned eyeshadow and a light pink lip. Lexi wears a shimmery black spaghetti strap bodycon dress and smoky shimmery eye-makeup with a plum lip. She’s also straightened her hair for the occasion. They all look gorgeous. 

“We’re going to break some hearts tonight, girls,” grins Priya, already pouring plastic flutes of Asti for them all (champagne is too fancy). They manage to get a few drinks and chats down before people start to arrive.

Soon enough, the small flat is packed with many familiar, and some unfamiliar faces. 

A little bit of time in, Lexi spots Bobby in animated conversation in the kitchen with Gary, Lottie, and Priya. He’s dressed in a plain black shirt and black jeans as she’s seen many times at the bar, but he’s also got some silly, glittery, neon green New Year’s sunglasses on his face. For some reason, the outfit looks better on him tonight. She watches as he laughs with the group, his dimples creasing in his freckled cheeks and wishes she could see those golden eyes beneath the shades. Then, upon realising she’s just standing in the middle of the flat cradling her sparkly staring at him, she brushes off her beer goggles and goes over to the group. She catches Bobby mid-question. 

“What’s the difference between Buck’s Fizz and a Mimosa?” he asks.

“Go on…” presses Gary. 

“Oh—no. That wasn’t a joke. I genuinely have no idea.”

Everyone is silent, mostly because they’re not sure either, Lexi lets out a little chuckle.

“Isn’t one American?” Lottie turns to ask Gary.

“No babe I think it’s about the ratio,” Gary says and Lexi takes her moment to step right beside Bobby. He notices her and his lips turn in a smirk.

“Hey,” she smiles.

“Hey, you look amazing,” Bobby grins, his eyes dragging up her body and admiring how her short tight dress looks on it. It’s nice to see her dressed up, and he’s never seen her in such well-fitting clothes, so he certainly likes it. He pulls his shades up onto his head.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” she smiles.

“Woah… was that a compliment?” He brings his hand to his chest in mocking shock, mouth gaping open.

Lexi doesn’t respond, instead plucks Bobby’s cup from his grip and takes a hearty swig.

“Oi! You’ve got your own drink in your hand!”

“I’m hosting. This is my tax,” she wipes her mouth and hands the drink back to Bobby, but he takes it and places it on the counter beside them.

“Well, I’m going to tax your tax.”

“What?” But before she can say anything else Bobby’s arm is snaking around her waist, and she feels it splay over the small of her back before he pulls her in tight to him. Her stomach flips at the sudden contact; she can feel each part of him against her. He brings his head down to her ear, breath hot on her neck and an intoxicating scent washing over her. It smells a bit like a bakery, and she wonders if he’d been working there today. Then there’s the subtle warmth of the orange bitters perfume he has dotted on his pulse points, and the sharp alcoholic strength from his breath. He lets his mouth hover over her ear for a moment, and his hands on her body, before he whispers:

“Don’t be too disgusted, you asked me to do this.”

But Lexi just gulps. She’s not disgusted at all. She knows she’s drunk and she knows alcohol makes her a little… looser. And sure, she’s always been attracted to Bobby, not many people wouldn’t be, but she’s sort of very… flushed by the situation. 

She remembers where they are just as Bobby pulls away.

“Aw, you guys!” exclaims Priya, and Lexi gives her an awkward little smile.

Bobby winks before he leaves with Gary to talk to some other people, leaving Lexi feeling a little taken aback. 

After collecting herself, she looks over to Lottie, who’s standing sipping her drink with a perfectly curved raised eyebrow.  _ Do people’s eyebrows really go to that angle? _

“What?” Lexi asks.

Lottie’s lips curl up into a smug smile, “Nothing.”

Lexi brushes it off and goes to chat to some more people. She greets Henrik who’s talking with Marisol and Elisa, and pulls her into a bear hug just like he had the last time. He’s calm and chilled in a way she really appreciates. The two women are a little less forward with their greetings, but friendly and lovely just as she remembers. She listens as Henrik talks about his passion for his work and his hobbies and that he’d love to see her at the café again soon. Just as she’s laughing at a story he’s told involving the countryside and a cow and a naked Henrik, Lucas slips in beside him. He gives Lexi a little smile, and she can’t help but smile in return. It’s been about a week since she’s seen him, but her heart flutters at the reunion, his usual good looks seeming even more devilish under the festive lights. He’s wearing an open white shirt and a pastel blue jacket and slacks. Very classy and very attractive. She wants to be able to reach over and kiss him, but knows she can’t.

“So I guess now is the time to tell you that Henrik here is my best mate,” he grins and takes an elegant sip from his champagne flute. It’s like he was made for parties and expensive alcohol and extravagance. 

She looks between the two men with wide eyes, “Yes it is! Tell me everything!”

So the duo dive into their story, finishing each other’s sentences like an old married couple and laughing about their past. After a while, someone Lexi doesn’t recognise (one of Chelsea’s work friends she’s sure) ambles up and engages the men in conversation. Marisol and Elisa have sort of siphoned off to the side where they’re being all touchy-feely. She needs a refill anyway, so she goes to top up her punch.

At the drinks area she comes across Noah’s friend Rahim and his girlfriend Shannon for the first time, and has a nice time talking with them. She can definitely see herself getting along with them both well. When the conversation starts to turn to the subject of Hope and Noah, Lexi sees that as her cue to leave.

And also apparently her cue to bump right into Noah.

“Noah!”

“Oh, hey Lexi,” he smiles, that gentle peacefulness about him. 

“How you doing?”

“Not so bad, it’s a little awkward you know, with the whole… Hope thing. But I think we’re planning to have a chat later,” he looks uneasy at the thought.

“That’s probably a good thing.”

He nods slowly as though considering, “I think I’ll need a few more drinks. I-” he pauses. Lexi cocks her head, waiting for him to continue. “I don’t know if I  _ want _ this to work.”

She smiles sympathetically and gives him a light squeeze on his arm in comfort, “You’ll figure it out. If it comes to midnight and she’s not who you want to kiss,” she tries not to look at Lucas in the background as she says this, “then your heart’s not in it.”

“Yeah. You’re probably right. Thanks Lexi.”

They embrace and part ways.

Everyone seems to be happily dancing, chatting, and drinking. Some more than others.

The group take shot, after shot, after shot. 

Lexi is swaying her hips in the centre of the room with a group of people, and Lucas can’t keep his eyes off her as he chats with Henrik in the kitchen. He watches her dance with a possessive hunger. He can’t take it anymore. He can’t watch her sway her hips like that and not be touching her. Especially after a long week apart. He swoops past slyly, grabbing her hand and taking them to the bedroom. He’s not sure if anyone sees them, but right now he doesn’t care. He pushes her up against the door to shut it, his arms either side of her head. They’re both pretty intoxicated by this point.

“You don’t know what you’re doing to me out there.”

She bites her lip. “I can guess,” comes out breathlessly as she draws a finger across his jawline. He practically growls at this. There’s a beguiling look of her oft wide eyes hooded by alcohol, sticky champagne lips parted slightly in a sultry smile, and the layer of sweat on her plump cheeks. Right now, he needs to kiss her. So he does. The moment is cut short however by a loud knock on Lexi’s door behind her. They jump apart. Lexi opens the door to reveal Lottie, her arms crossed and a stern look on her face. 

“Just checking you were okay,” she says, looking Lucas up and down.

“Yeah fine thanks Lottie.” But the moment is over, and they follow her back into the main room.

Elsewhere, Bobby’s really rather drunk. The flat is a bit of a blur, and everything seems hilarious.  _ Too many shots. _ For a tiny flat, he seems to find himself getting lost ridiculously easy—there are only four rooms for god's sake. But either way, there are many bodies and he’s drunk and confused. Nothing’s quite forming in front of him as he stumbles around. Gary and Lottie had escaped away somewhere for some alone time, and he’d just kept moving from group to group with a new drink each time.

And he keeps thinking about the same thing: his midnight kiss. Because in previous years he’s kissed Louis (pre-marriage), Jonno, or Gary; but Jonno couldn’t make it and Gary is with Lottie, so the thought is, well. It’s that the closest thing to a best friend he has here is Lexi. So he wants her to be his New Years kiss. As a friend. But as he gets drunker and more desperate, he tries not to ask himself why this feels so important to him. He’s barely caught her since the beginning of the night, like ships passing by each other and never colliding. The moment they’d shared earlier had affected him, and he’d been a little afraid to revisit it until he’d had much more to drink, hence the drunkenness.

At about ten to midnight and mid-search for Lexi, he’s stopped by Hannah. He’s only met her once on the night out and she seems nice enough, but he wants to find Lexi as quickly as possible. Maybe they could chat about it before he tries to kiss her. He thinks about what he might say:

_ Well, it’ll convince everyone we’re a thing. _

_ It’s just between friends, just for fun. _

_ You owe me, remember? _

But he’s broken from his reverie by a voice coming from below. 

“Hey, you’re not single right?” Hannah sighs. 

“Uh, no. I’m sort of seeing Lexi.” He could’ve told the truth, but not here in her flat to her friends. And, he doesn’t really want to tell Hannah he’s single.

“Oh, right,” she deflates, looking sad and slumped, like Eeyore. “I wish I had a midnight kiss.”

Bobby is internally screaming,  _ Someone save me from this hellish conversation. _

“Aw, I mean, there’s plenty of lads and lasses ‘round here,” he tries to comfort her, already planning his escape.

The BBC firework display countdown is playing on the TV. Chelsea and Lexi watch it every year—they wanted to go once, since it’s in London, but figured it would be far too busy and intense. They’d rather enjoy each other’s company in the cosiness of their own home, or someone else’s. Lexi has fond memories of their first New Years together, when the party Chelsea was invited to wouldn’t allow her to take Lexi as a plus one, so instead (although much to the protest of Lexi) she stayed home. They stuffed themselves with food and danced around and drank lots and cuddled on the sofa before a sweet peck on the lips at midnight and loads of giggles.

Lexi knows Lucas won’t want to kiss her at midnight. Not in front of everyone. But she has a sudden urge of confidence and wants to try, she just has to find him. And quick. It’s odd how the small apartment can make finding people so difficult.

10… 

She spots him over by the front door… stuck between a Hope and a hard place.

9… 

She hopes he’ll see her, but he doesn’t.

8… 

Well, she wasn’t expecting much anyway. So she turns her full attention to Chelsea, who’s bouncing up and down as she counts at the top of her voice.

7… 

She squeezes her hand.

6… 

Bobby sees Lexi by the TV, and wonders if he can get out of this conversation in the next five seconds without being stupidly rude.

5… 

Hannah has said something else he isn’t hearing.

4… 

He can see Lexi right there, grinning by the TV...

3… 

If he could just escape.

2… 

He gives Hannah a smile and a pat on the back, which might be really rude but he’s drunk and focused, before striding over towards Lexi. At this point he’s done being polite.

1… 

Lexi smiles at Chelsea, feeling warm and happy despite not being able to midnight kiss Lucas.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

The cheers and whoops which follow are drowned out as a pair of lips hit Lexi’s and her eyes automatically shut. 

They’re soft and belong to someone taller than her. It’s definitely not Chelsea, as she feels her hand slip out of her own. They taste of chili vodka, from the mystery shots Lexi guesses, and they don’t kiss roughly. She wonders if it’s maybe Lucas, or rather she  _ hopes _ it’s Lucas. Surely he wouldn’t in front of everyone, right? And this kiss doesn’t feel particularly familiar. But she’s drunk and not thinking all that straight, and just sort of lets it happen. It doesn’t last all that long though, and as she breaks away Lexi’s eyes flutter open to reveal who it is.

It’s not Lucas at all.

It’s Noah.


	27. The Fallout

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the New Years party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter playlist:  
> Paradise Circus - Massive Attack  
> The Great Longing - Lost Under Heaven  
> Wild Love - James Bay

Bobby stares with his mouth wide open as he watches the scene inches from him. He was  _ so close. _ And then his moment was interrupted. Noah - sweet, reserved Noah - kissing Lexi. The girl Bobby wanted to kiss. He tries not to question the past tense.  _ Noah kissing Lexi _ . Noah who he hadn’t even known isn’t seeing Hope any longer—who for the record looks like her entire world has collapsed. She’s stood by Lucas for reasons he doesn’t know with a face like a tragedy. He’s confused and a little upset although he has no right to be. And his stomach definitely doesn’t flip uncomfortably; if it does it’s due to too much alcohol. His head hurts and his mouth’s dry and he has to pry his eyes away from that look on Lexi’s face.

He watches as Noah pulls away, looking shocked at himself and Lexi jumps back a little when she sees him. And then he looks over to Lucas and Hope who both look devastated in different ways. Lucas is fairly stoic except for the fact his jaw is incredibly tight and his hands are fisted at his sides. Hope is an odd mixture of anger and upset: eyes flicking between her friend and her ex and her eyebrows dancing like they can’t make their mind up.

Noah holds his hands up like he doesn’t want to touch anything, like they’re tainted. Like he can’t believe he just had them around Lexi’s waist. Lexi pulls her eyes away from him and looks to Lucas and her heart breaks. She knows that look. Her mouth moves up and down a little like she wants to say something but she can’t form it. Her fingers twitch at her sides like she wants to reach out to him.

“I- Lexi I-” Noah starts but Hope cuts him off.

“I think we need to go and talk, Noah.”

Pretty much everyone at the party has their eyes on the scene, and follow Noah with their eyes as he nods and walks over to Hope, where they leave together.

Lexi’s eyebrows downturn as she watches Lucas, something unsaid in their eye contact. He shakes his head almost imperceptibly, blink and you miss it, but Lexi can’t take her eyes off of him and doesn’t miss a thing. Her mouth hovers open again.

Lucas is lost. He isn’t sure what to think. He knows he should’ve talked to Lexi about the Bobby thing before, ensured that it was clear he wanted to see her exclusively because now she’s here kissing people who aren’t even Bobby, and worst of all—someone who isn’t Lucas. He  _ knows _ he should talk to her about this, she doesn’t seem all that clued up on what’s happening, but right now he hurts. He’s drunk and just watched the girl he cares for kissing another man. Especially when he hadn’t been man enough to kiss her publicly himself. He knows he can’t leave while the flat is silent and awkward, it’ll be too obvious. But he also hates that he’s thinking like this. Why can’t he just let a good thing be a good thing? He’s upset with her, but ultimately it isn’t her fault. They should’ve talked about this. They should’ve done so much more than just follow their desires down the road and ignore the warning signs. 

“Should old acquaintance be forgot, and Auld Lang Syne!” Chelsea tries to start a chain, grabbing the hands of Marisol and Rahim beside her, but the mood has shifted. 

Lexi is momentarily pulled from her mind by Chelsea, turning to her. But when she turns back to Lucas, determined to talk to him now that people are distracted, he’s gone. An empty space stares back at her. The singing seems to come to a bit, more people joining in the song and grabbing nearby hands. People become more focused on themselves and Lexi takes her moment. She rushes to the door, blind and deaf as she scrambles her shaking hands against the wood and hurries after Lucas. But he isn’t there. He isn’t in the corridor, the stairway; he isn’t outdoors in the chill where she shivers to the chorus of  _ happy new year _ and well wishes and love confessions. The fireworks mock her as she lumbers back upstairs and into her flat. There’s some dancing and drunken singing and the spirit seems like nothing had happened.

She turns to Chelsea and whispers in her ear, “I’m going to my room for a bit, Happy New Year,” but there’s no heart in the well wishes.

“Yeah, okay babe, I’m right here when you need me. Always.” She squeezes Lexi’s hand before the latter walks rather rushedly over to her bedroom and slams the door behind her. She and Chelsea both know that if she were ready to discuss it she would say. The sound of happy singing and laughing and dancing and drunkenness floods her ears as she plasters herself against her door. She remembers the way she’d been plastered there just hours before by Lucas.  _ Lucas. _ Oh god. She wanted it to be him. Maybe that’s why she’d let it happen. Blind hope. She isn’t completely sure why she had. She was drunk, in the moment, but she supposes it doesn’t really matter why. It’s happened now. Tears start to fall down her face because she’s intoxicated and fucked everything up. She pulls out her phone and sends off a text.

**Lexi** : lucas please talk to me

The read receipt appears almost immediately. She waits for the typing dots. And waits. And waits. They don’t come. She sends off another text.

**Lexi** : noah what the fuck was that

But he doesn’t even read it. Busy with Hope she supposes. A third text follows.

**Lexi** : hope im so sorry I have no clue what just happened can we please talk

She stifles some tears and throws herself on her bed, letting the emotions take her over. She’s starting the new year well. The sound of party poppers and party horns and obnoxious laughter makes for the background of the ringing in her ears.

Not too long after there’s a knock at her door.

“Hey. It’s me,” slightly slurred Scottish permeates her door and instantly some of her nerves settle.

She moves to open the door for him and he stumbles a little as he is surprised at the movement, before stepping in and letting her lock the door behind him. He just looks at her a moment.

“I can’t believe he kissed you,” he says blankly, no discernible emotion behind it.

“Neither can I,” she groans, but her lips wobble a little as he confirms that everyone had seen.

“Did you… want to?” He shifts slightly from foot to foot, her answer a huge question mark in his head.

“What? No! Noah’s my friend! I’ve never been interested in him like that. Have I ever seemed interested?”

“No. I guess not.” He exhales and sits on the edge of Lexi’s bed, patting the spot next to him for her to sit in. Surprisingly, she obeys almost immediately. She looks up at him wide eyed and glassy and she’s shaking. She’s crying. Sniffing and faltering. He’s never seen her cry before. When she’d called him that night she’d kissed Lucas he’d heard her over the phone, but never seen her. And it’s the least important thing in this moment, but she looks to Bobby the definition of pretty when crying. He melts at the way she’s staring at him, like he can tell her all the answers to her problems.

“So why do you think he did it?”

“I don’t know. I have no idea until he answers my texts or comes to actually talk to me but… I don’t know.”

“What about Lucas? Did you manage to catch him? I saw you leave.”

“No. He’d gone. The way he looked at me… and Hope...” she looks at her hands and Bobby’s sure the thick film over her eyes must be stinging. “I know what he means with that look. Hurt, betrayed?”

“Doesn’t he still think you’re with me, anyway?”

“I guess… I mean… I don’t know. I don’t know.”

He doesn’t say anything else, just gently rests a hand just above her knee. She seems to cry harder at this, as his thumb rubs comfortingly over her bare skin. Her sobs set contrastingly to the lingering party music coming from the main room. And then after a while and more crying, Lexi lets her head turn to look at him.

He’s blurred through her tears, but there he is again, sat on her bed when she needs him. His lips twitch up in a sad little smile, sympathetic eyebrows and she isn’t sure if it’s the alcohol or the tears but his own eyes seem a little glassy too.

“Why does it feel like you’re always saving me?” she whispers, searching his eyes for a reason.

“I guess I am, but that’s what friends are for.”

She swallows at the sincerity in his customarily playful face, the soothing movements of his hand, his wise words despite the fact she can tell he’s drunk.

“Hey,” his eyes flash with a little smile, “Happy New Year.”

She can’t help but let out a watery sputter of laughter at the irony, “I guess it’s only up from here. Happy New Year, Bobby.”

—-

January passes by in a haze. Bobby is Lexi’s rock in the coming weeks. He’s always sure to text, or even come by to check on her. He makes sure to watch the crappiest of crappy films and try to get her out every now and again in the fresh air (well, somewhat fresh) of London. They go for coffee, for lunch - anything to show her that she doesn’t need to beat herself up over this.

Priya, Chelsea, and Lottie are all too happy to partake in Operation Let Lexi Forgive Herself, too. But for whatever reason, they let Bobby take the reins. That doesn’t stop the countless Netflix binges and wine nights and fortunes told, but every little bit helps.

Work isn’t too bad, Lexi’s back to her usual duties - locked in the storeroom with no need to interact with customers. Or, worse, Lucas. She tried talking to him at every opportunity for about a week, but he was never around or always had somewhere else to be. And when it was very clear he wouldn’t give the chance to hear a word she said, she stopped. What else could she do? She can’t apologise when he won’t forgive her. She just wishes that he knows that she didn’t want it to happen. Kissing Noah was the bottom of the list of things she wanted to ring the new year in with. Kissing Lucas had been at the top. Noah’s promised over text a proper talk through. She waits for his scheduled date but the days pass by and she’s less and less sure it’s happening this month. Hope has sent a short but cutting message.

**Hope** : I know it’s not your fault, but I need time to work things out.

One which has had no follow up. 

—-

One day in late January, Bobby and Lexi sit in Wilderness Coffee together. This time there’s no ‘fake date’, and certainly no festive cheer; just two friends chatting over coffee. Bobby’s been worried about Lexi. He’s convinced she’s more upset about hurting Lucas than she is about losing him. Maybe because she’s used to not having him. 

“He doesn’t say a word to me at work,” she sighs, but the true hurt he’d seen on the first of the year is gone, replaced by a sort of exhausted frustration.

“That idiot…” he sighs in kind. She gives him a pointed look. “Well it’s true! If he just let you explain maybe he wouldn’t be so weird.”

“It doesn’t matter. There’s no fixing anything without communication.” She looks down at her hands in her lap, fiddling them.

“You know Lottie’s been giving him a bit of a time of it?”

Her head shoots up, “What?”

“Nothing too obvious. She told me she’s been doing some shit with her cards and crystals. I don’t know. Good friend that one.” He takes a large sip of his coffee concoction (a Henrik special, apparently), and looks into those eyes that always seem to be looking back.

She smiles, “Yeah.”

Bobby can’t bear the way she’s beating herself up over it all. Sure, she’s not blameless, but it’s as much Noah’s fault as hers and at the end of the day she hadn’t done anything technically wrong. Morally mauve, perhaps. She and Lucas had never made things official, and never even discussed the Bobby situation, so as far as he was aware she’d not only been seeing him anyway. Frankly, he’s a little confused why Lucas is acting this way. Well, that is until his own feelings float around somewhere at the pit of his stomach and remind him of the sight. So yeah, he gets why Lucas is upset, but not why he won’t even talk to her. 

He thinks back, and knows one thing that might relax her, or give her time to think. 

“I think we should bake. Double chocolate muffins.”

“Bobby, as much as Henrik likes you, I don’t think he’d give up his kitchen for you to make a mess all over. Plus, I have no idea what Lucas has said to him about me.”

“Not here, silly. At my place.”

Lexi balks a bit, not expecting the suggestion at all. “Ooh, the famous Mr McKenzie bachelor pad? Okay, I’m in.”

He grins that cheeky smirk as he throws back the dredges of his drink. She finishes hers and with a smile to Henrik they leave, jumping on the tube. It’s the same line they take to Lexi’s, but they get off at a different stop. 

Bobby’s neighbourhood isn’t so dissimilar to Lexi’s, blocks of flats and the occasional little shop.

When they reach Bobby’s flat, she’s nervous and excited to see it, even though she’s sure it’s going to be nothing special. The guy works two low-paying jobs and lives in London. Still, this is Bobby’s space. And that idea intrigues her a lot.

“Well, welcome to my humble abode,” he opens the door as he talks, and waits to the side for Lexi to step in.

It’s pretty much how she expects. A long, thin corridor with plain white walls and a laminate wood-style flooring greets them; two closed doors lead off on each side of the corridor. Lexi presumes these are the bedroom and bathroom. She’s proven correct as she walks down the corridor to the end room which is a living area-kitchen all-in-one. Well, the living room consists of one small navy blue sofa and a years-old telly, but still. The kitchen is fairly spacious for the flat size, and it makes a lot of sense. A large window sits on one edge of the kitchen, washing in a huge ray of cold sunlight over the counter tops. She can picture Bobby in there right now, some sort of silly apron on and dancing along to something. 

It’s surprisingly tidy, but comfortingly lived-in. She smiles and exhales a small laugh.

“What?”

She’s thinking:  _ it’s very you and I like it very much. It feels pretty special that you let me here. _ So god knows why she says:

“So this is where you bring all your ladies?”

He chuckles a little himself but it’s not as playful as usual. “Nah, I don’t bring girls here.”

Lexi hides her shock by rummaging about in her bag and applying a coat of Vaseline on her chapped lips. She isn’t sure how to respond to that.

“Here,” says Bobby, motioning for her bag. She hands him it and he places it on one of the kitchen chairs. Passing along her coat too, Lexi can’t help but wonder how he’s feeling right now.

“So, cupcakes,” he wiggles his eyebrows, “What do you say, cupcake?”

“Funny. How are we gonna do this? We both like baking…”

“I’ll measure the dry stuff and you do the wet. Then we’ll mix together,” he winks and she scoffs but they make a move to the kitchen anyway. It feels a little strange, that she’s here for the sole purpose of making cupcakes, but also oddly right. 

Bobby hands over an apron which is blue and has little dough illustrations, with the phrase ‘just roll with it’ in the centre. Taking the apron with a grimace, Lexi folds the material over her fingers, feeling the cotton and imagining Bobby wearing it around his place, before she hooks it over her head.  _ I knew he’d have something like this. _

“Nice tagline,” she smirks as she loops the ties around her waist.

“It’s fun! Here,” he pulls out his own with a flourish, and it reads ‘(melon) baller’ and an arrow up to his face.

“Oh god, of course you’d have that.”

With a laugh, Bobby ties his own apron to himself.

Their collecting ingredients and measuring consists of a lot of attempted sabotage. The scales get hidden, flour gets puffed about, ingredients get moved. They’re a mess of laughter and stupid pranks. Like they’ve been friends for the longest time.

“Hey!” Lexi protests when Bobby wipes a line of flour down her nose. She responds by wiping some butter on his chin which he licks off with a smirk. It seems like Lexi loses track of everything, letting things happen like they’re the most natural things in the world. The spot down her nose is very noticeable to her, and it’s not because of the flour.

Once they finally combine everything, they mix together, which also proves hilarious. Bobby holds the back of the mixer and Lexi holds the front, and they can’t stop laughing as they whir it around the bowl.

“Wait no hold it tighter!” Bobby chortles as the whisk moves in jaggedly motions in directions they don’t intend.

They then spoon the mixture into silicone cupcake moulds, occasionally licking some batter from their fingers.

“Now we just wait about twenty minutes.”

“I’m a patient girl,” she shrugs, wiping her hands down on her apron. They mix up the chocolate buttercream as the cupcakes bake, then begin to clean out the bowl of batter with spoons. Soon enough it’s time to take them out.

They look insane, deep brown and smelling of heaven. Lexi just wants to stuff one in her mouth.

“Do we have to ice them? Can’t we just dip the cupcake into the icing?”

“No! You need to wait for them to cool properly,” he chastises, holding a hand protectively over the tray. 

She grunts and begins to pace the kitchen. But mentally, she’s thinking about the way his hand hovered wearing those rings and his long fingers and the veins running down them… she’s less frustrated about the waiting for the cupcakes and more about trying to push down these thoughts. And the thoughts of the fact that he’d do all this for her. Look after her like this for the silliest of reasons.

He smirks up at her as he leans against the island, looking like he's modelling the apron, lips pursing in humour, “I thought you said you were a patient girl?”

She gives him a pointed stare, but there’s no hiding the sparkle in her eyes as she responds: “Oh, shut it, McKenzie.”


	28. The Repair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby continues to be there for Lexi, Lexi and Noah finally get to talk. A long-kept secret gets revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge thank you to Sarah for beta reading🥺❤️
> 
> Chapter Playlist:  
> Landslide - Fleetwood Mac  
> Unwind Yourself - Marva Whitney  
> Faded - ZHU

That Friday, the 29th January, Lucas finally speaks to Lexi. But it’s not anything she wants to hear. The bar needs cleaning and Lucas has to show his face somewhere. To his credit, he’d asked Lottie first, but Gary was already there to pick her up and he’d parked on double yellows. So, here she is again collecting a bucket and dragging her feet out into the empty bar.

“Hey, what took so long?” Bobby looks up from his phone where he’s leaning by the entrance.

Lexi just holds up the mop, exhaustion and defeat clear on her face.

“Really?”

“Sorry Bobby. You should head back home, this will take a while.”

He sighs and walks towards her, but stops by a barstool, where he takes his jacket off and leans it over the back of the seat. Then he rolls his neck and cracks his knuckles dramatically. “Bring it on!”

“What are you doing?”

“I’m not going anywhere. This will go way quicker with two.”

“ _ Far _ quicker.”

“Ew don’t do that.”

She sighs, “Except this is my job and I’m being paid, you’re not. Seriously I can handle this, and it’s late, anyway.”

“No chance,” he grins as he comes closer, and plucks the mop from her hands.

Defeated, she crumbles under his smug grin and the way he stands slightly over her. “Fine, let me owe you lunch or something.”

“Deal. I won’t let you forget that.”

He winks as he seems satisfied with the answer and jumps back over to his jacket, pulls out his phone, and messes around on it for a second. Lexi feels a warmth as she watches him furrow his brow and bite his lip. Something about the fact he’d really help her clean up when it isn’t even his job is making her swallow hard. Something about the fact that he’d baked cupcakes with her for the sole purpose of cheering her up. Something about the fact he’d sat there with her on New Years looking after her when he could’ve been having fun. Yeah, lots of swallowing hard.

She’d argued as much as she could, she knew he wouldn’t back down. And honestly? She’s incredibly grateful for the help.

So Bobby begins to play music from his phone and they grab supplies to make a start. They antibac all the surfaces, the chairs, load up the dishwashers a couple of times, and dust the fancy lampshades. It takes a small while, but not nearly as long as it would’ve if Lexi had been by herself.

A little while in, as Lexi watches Bobby, well, bobbing his head to the music, that song comes to its end. The sound of  _ Landslide _ by Fleetwood Mac starts to play from Bobby’s phone, and a warm smile spreads on his face.

“I love this song,” Lexi grins.

“The best people do,” he motions to himself, then places his cleaning equipment on the nearest table. Bobby extends a hand toward Lexi with a dramatic flourish as he nears her. He’s not entirely sure what his motivations are, but he’s letting himself follow his instincts. He’s always wanted to dance to this song.

Lexi watches the slow smile on his face, and hesitates before placing her cleaning equipment on the bar. She isn’t entirely sure what’s happening, but words don’t feel right at this moment. She nears him, every step to the time of the song and appraises his hand held out in front of him. 

Taking his hand, Lexi laughs a little before Bobby pulls her flush to his body. She tries to hide the slight involuntary gasp and the surprise in her eyes but stares into his all the same.  _ What are we doing? This is so weird… so why doesn’t it feel awkward?  _ Ease washes over her as Bobby’s other hand rests on her waist tight enough. She tingles from the touch and bites away a smile. This is an intimacy they haven’t really shared since their first meeting. It may seem odd after becoming so close, but keeping their distance physically felt like a good call to both of them, even if they weren’t entirely sure why. They begin to sway lightly to the music.

They step in time, nothing complex. Bobby’s hand is wrapped around Lexi’s and she can feel his palms and his fingers and the rings on them over the edge of her own hand. They don’t entwine, that feels like a risk neither of them want to take.

“Well Miss Mitchell, you’re quite the dancer,” grins Bobby in a rather convincing English accent.

Lexi throws her head back in a gentle laugh, but shifts straight into character. “Thank you, Mr McKenzie. I must practise in order to marry a suitable man of the many suitors who knock at my father’s door.”

“I imagine you shall be engaged soon, Miss Mitchell. How agreeable you are...” he raises an eyebrow in jest.

“Yes, this side to side was very difficult to learn,” she snorts.

“I knew you were an Austen girl.”

“How could you tell?”

“You seem to like the classics. How much more classic can you get than ol’ Jane-y.” His thumb starts to move slowly up and down over her own. She is very aware of the contact.

“Well I mean, probably Homer—”

She stops abruptly as Bobby laughs at her, but it’s not mocking—there’s a disarming warmth in his features. One that suggests he’d listen to the most boring Homer rant ever if she wanted to say it. 

“What?”

“Nothing.” He turns his attention to their hands again, slowly moving only his pinky. As he shifts it, Lexi’s index finger is lifted with the movement and the pads softly brush against each-other, considering one another for a brief pause. It’s like it moves in slow-motion, before Bobby hooks his pinky into the gap between her index and middle. He gives a slight squeeze when it lands, and Lexi’s whole hand is on fire. She looks to his face, where he’s smirking as he so often is, and she raises an uncertain eyebrow.

Feeling a little off-guard, Lexi changes the subject. “You know, I really don’t think they danced like this in the regency. Especially not to Fleetwood Mac.”

“Not true, Stevie Nicks is a time traveller from the 1800s.”

“Oh yeah?” she chuckles.

“Yep.  _ Go Your Own Way _ is actually code for ‘I’m travelling into the future’.”

She rolls her eyes playfully. “Next you’ll tell me  _ The Chain _ is the mode of transport,” she mocks, and he shrugs. “So - you’ve read Austen then?”

He looks a little bashful, “No. I’ve only seen the BBC 1995 series, but man is Colin Firth sexy.”

“Mmm,” she scrunches her face up in approval. “One day I’ll make you watch the Keira Knigtley one. It’s got some great lines.”

“Ones that weren’t in the book?”

She shakes her head.

“Fine. One day. But I’m not reading it.”

“Deal.”

Lexi is about to say something else, but the music is coming to an end. It feels she’s lost her moment. As the song finishes up the next song starts playing:  _ Unwind Yourself _ by Marva Whitney. Bobby immediately breaks away from Lexi and starts grooving to the music. 

“Oh okay—old school! I like it!” Lexi laughs and starts dancing herself. They whip out all the moves, the sprinkler, the twist, shuffling, and just generally throwing themselves about to the music. It sort of feels like the moment is being shaken off, and it still hangs in the air between them. Their cleaning equipment is momentarily forgotten.

“Okay, we need to finish,” Lexi exhales when the song finishes.

“That’s what she said!”

“Oh lord.”

But the two collect up their appliances and get back to work. With the two of them, it doesn’t take so long until the bar is spick and span.

“What do you say to a drink?” Bobby asks as he puts the dishwasher on for one last round.

“Uh, no, I don’t particularly feel like getting fired today.”

“No, silly,” he brandishes a hip flask from his pocket.

“Where the fuck did you get that?”

“Your drinks are expensive! This is quality stuff.”

“Is it Scottish?”

“Is there anything else?”

She sighs but takes the flask from him and swigs a little.

“Do you make a habit of stealing people’s drinks?”

“Just yours.”

She laughs as she leads them back into the main room, and they take seats at the bar. But it’s getting late, and feels like it’s time to get serious. 

“Talisker for your troubles?” he asks, sliding the flask across the counter. She catches it and takes another swig.

They sit in their stools, thighs inches apart, faces trained on the wooden surface. The buzz coming from them both seeps into the atmosphere. Bobby turns his attention to Lexi, his usual jokey quips not feeling quite right for the situation.

“He’s not coming back, Bobby,” she turns to him, eyes glassy, a disappointed certainty to her voice.

He twists his lips up into a sad smile, he doesn’t feel he can argue with that. “At least now you know you kinda dodged a bullet,” he half-heartedly laughs.

“Yeah,” she smiles too but it doesn’t meet her eyes, still grey and glassy. “Shame we put all that work in, eh?”

“Well I don’t know. It was kinda fun if you ask me,” he leans his elbow on her shoulder playfully.

They make their way through the flask at a fair pace, somewhat silent but not at all awkward. Each try not to ask themselves what this means for them now. They’re friends, but the crutch is gone. Bobby no longer serves Lexi a purpose, and he’s terrified of that.

—-

Early into February Noah finally asks to meet. He and Lexi sit opposite each other at Costa Coffee on a Tuesday afternoon. Lexi has the day off work. They wait until their drinks come to abandon the pleasantries.

“I need some answers… this whole thing has really messed with my relationship with… Bobby,” she chokes out the name at the end, almost forgetting that he’s somewhat of a beard. Luckily for her, Noah’s stunt hadn’t messed up anything with Bobby.

“I have no excuse. I was drunk and upset and the thing you said… I didn’t want to kiss Hope,” he swallows at looks down at his mug, “my heart wasn’t in it,” he echoes her words from that night.

“Just looking for a way to implode that relationship?”

“Yeah… I guess,” he says with a sad smile. “I’m so sorry Lexi. I can try and talk to Bobby if you’d like? We were kind of friends, before…”

“No, don’t worry. Thanks for telling me.”  _ Even if he knew it was Lucas, I’m not sure Lucas would want to hear it from Noah. _

“I just wanted a reason for her to fall out of love with me. It was a coward’s way out. We’ve spoken about it now. That’s why I waited to talk to you, I had to see her first.”

“So you two are okay?”

He nods. “And just so you know, I don’t like, have feelings for you or anything. I just trust you and feel safe with you. I wasn’t trying it on.”

“Yeah, I know,” she sighs. “Can you kiss a randomer next time?” she laughs lightly.

He laughs too, “Yeah. I really am sorry, Lexi. I didn’t think about you and that’s on me.”

“Don’t worry about it.” She shakes her head.

Before they part ways, Lexi pulls him into a warm hug, he’s a little stiff, but it’s clear he appreciates that their friendship is intact.

She wanders home feeling utterly drained. It’s a good thing that Noah isn’t secretly in love with her, but also sort of sucks more that it was all for nothing. Lucas hates her for a kiss she didn’t want to have and, as it turns out, neither did Noah. The whole thing has her feeling pretty despairing, she just wishes Lucas would talk to her.

So when she arrives back to find Priya and Chelsea waiting eagerly on the sofa, she knows her plans.

“How did it go?” Chelsea asks eagerly. She’d told them about Noah, and used Bobby as a scapegoat again. 

“So—there was no real reason,” she explains.

“Oh…”

“Oh?”

“Yep.”

“Well, shit. Are you two okay?”

“Yeah. We’re okay. I’m hoping this means maybe Hope will talk to me soon too…”

“Awww, hun.”

“But, I think I need a drink.” She goes to the kitchen and pulls out a bottle of gin.

“Don’t you have work tonight?” Priya asks.

“Nope, night off.”

“Well, I guess we’ll join you then.”

—-

After the fifth drink Lexi starts to lose count. Chelsea and Priya, significantly less drunk, are trying to slow her roll. But she isn’t stopping. And it’s not long before she’s slip sliding on the sofa and cackling a laugh which only comes out when she’s drunk.

“God I feel like my life is like a reality TV show sometimes,” she slurs.

“Right, it has all been a bit upended for you recently,” Priya comforts as she looks, concerned, at Chelsea.

“No one blames you for being frustrated and needing to de-steam a bit,” Chelsea adds. 

“There’s Noah and Bobby and…” she lulls her head back on the sofa and shuts her eyes.

“And?”

“And Lucas!” she slurs, “Best in bed I can tell. He’s so good,” she snickers, biting a lip dreamily at the memory in her drunk state.

“I mean, I could see it. He’s got that dark brooding thing going on,” Chelsea ponders, scrunching her features in an adorable way.

“Don’t people say that’s overcompensation?” adds Priya.

“Oh it’s not,” chuckles Lexi. She knows she’s flirting with fire, but it feels liberating.

“Well how would you know?” Priya laughs also in response.

And it’s probably mostly the alcohol, but she’s so exhausted of everything being a ruse or a big deal, so this motivates what she does next. Lexi’s head lolls back on the cushions and she slams her fingers interlocked to show what she means.

“Um… I’m not sure what you—”

“No way! You shagged him?!”

“Uh well…”  _ Oh. Oh no. Immediate regret. _

“You didn’t tell us?”

“When did this happen??”

_ Ah shit _ . Suddenly Lexi feels guilt and regret creeping up all over her and her whirring brain is pumping out of her head. She can’t deal with this right now. She has no clue why she did that. After all, she’d been wanting to tell them for ages but never had, so drunk her had made the decision for her. She’s a terrible liar, and keeping this from them had felt hard, but seeing their complete surprise was harder. They hadn’t expected her to keep something. And sure, Lexi’s sex life is Lexi’s business, but when she’s spent so long pining over him and asking the girls for advice, it feels like she’s been cruel by keeping it. Especially with the added layer of her fake fling with Bobby. The whole thing is making her nervous, and she absolutely knows she can’t have this conversation just yet. She mentally hits herself for thinking this was something she was ready to talk about.

She stands with a stumble.

“What are you doing?” Priya asks, slight annoyance in her tone.

But Lexi just starts to walk to the door.

“Are you going to talk to us?”

“Where on earth are you going?”

She knows where she’s going before her feet have even taken her out the door.


	29. Whenever You Want Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi lets her feet take her to the place she needs to be the most.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ty to the amazing Sarah for correcting all my silly mistakes and letting me chat shit about woyl plot points💚
> 
> Chapter Playlist:  
> Heal The Pain - George Michael  
> Asleep - The Smiths  
> God Only Knows (Piano Version) - Lily Moore  
> 

Around 8pm Bobby is sitting on his sofa in his sleepwear flicking through the channels on his TV after a long working day split between the bakery and the hospital. Monotonous, boring, and not what he wants to be doing right now.  _ Eastenders, _ the news,  _ Dinner Date,  _ old reruns of  _ Would I Lie To You,  _ old reruns of  _ Friends _ . 

_ There’s nothing on. _

He lets it stop on some film that’s played a hundred times and sighs himself back into his sofa. A throw falls down from the top onto him but he can’t be bothered to move it. Because his mind wanders to someone. Despite everything, despite the looking after her and checking up on her and walking her home, Bobby can’t help but be worried about Lexi. She’s just been a little… flatter? since New Years. Smiling around him when he can make her do so, but with a general air of exhaustion. Regardless of the fact that Lexi isn’t always blindingly sunshine-y or anything, she always had a brightness about her. A hidden glint in her eye that she picked her moment to unleash, and when she did it warmed him from the inside. Particularly when he was the one causing it. Which, if he’s honest, is fairly often. 

But since the party it’s been more difficult, like the glint has been dulled.

Baking with her the other day had been fun, and he’d felt disarmingly comfortable. He just wishes that he can make  _ her _ feel that way, and continue to.

And he knows she went to see Noah today, but she hasn’t yet told him what happened. Not that he’s been sitting by the phone checking it every few minutes. Not at all.

He tries to focus on the film but is too distracted. Then all of a sudden the doorbell rings.  _ Who’s here at this time? _

He groans as he lifts himself off the sofa, replacing the throw before turning the volume down and shuffling to the door. He opens it to reveal the person on the other side.

It’s Lexi. 

She’s red in the face and dishevelled. Her lip’s wobbling. There’s a strong aroma of gin emanating from her.  _ Shit, she’s absolutely plastered. _ He’s seen her drunk before, a few times, but never this drunk. And she looks upset, too. That one tugs at his chest.

“Hi,” she wavers.

“Hey, Lexi, come in.” The voice he uses is soft and soothing and laced with concern.

She trudges into his flat and plops herself onto his sofa like she’s done it a hundred times. Bobby closes the front door and makes his way over to her. 

“What’s up? What are you doing here?” he asks, a little confused at her presence and even more so at her state. Why would she come here, drunk, in the middle of the evening? To  _ him.  _

“Everyone knows I fucked my boss,” she whines, covering her face with her hands.

Bobby pauses a moment, not expecting that, and a little uncomfortable at the reminder. “I thought he wasn’t your boss?” he tries to lighten the mood.

“UGHHHH!!”

“That’s… good, right? No more secrets?”

“Hhhhhhhh,” she makes a weird congealed noise into her hands.

“Who’s everyone?”

“Chelthea and Pwiya.”

“Oh, that’s not so bad.”

“I lied to them, Bobby,” she slurs. Her head is still in her hands but she begins to sway to the sides a little. He goes to sit beside her and pats her on the back hesitantly.

“I think it’s okay. Your bedroom activities are your business, not theirs. They’ll forgive you. They love you so much.”

“There’s something wrong with me, I upset the people I love and I know I’m overreacting but I couldn’t handle it and I had to leave and-”

“There’s nothing wrong with you.”  _ Except maybe your blood alcohol levels currently. Or your choice in men. _

“I’m fucking shit. I’m a piece of fucking shit I’m-“ she lifts her head as she stumbles over her words to finally look at Bobby. He fixes her with his eyes. Sure and certain and comforting.

“You’re not.”

The way she’s looking up at him clutches at his chest again. Those wide, grey eyes drowning in tears and the slow drunken blinks stare back at him. The way she fiddles her hands in front of her because she isn’t entirely sure what she’s doing here.

Lexi isn’t. Sure, that is. As she looks up to Bobby through the blurred film it’s like he’s the only thing that’s clear. Maybe it’s something to do with the fact that, odd as it may be, Bobby is the only person in Lexi’s life right now that she hadn’t lied to. He knows everything and is still her friend despite it. He’s spent the better part of the past month making sure she’s okay because of a stupid little kiss. He’s been there, every time she’s needed him.

And as the alcohol clouds her judgement and berates her and makes her dramatise every little thing—she’s glad Bobby is there right next to her, solid.

The only thing Bobby can think to do in this moment is embrace her. So he pulls her head into his chest with a tender hand, sitting them back on the sofa. Lets his hand stroke her hair gently. She starts to shake with her quiet sobs on his chest, and he just holds her, one arm around her shoulders and the other hand moving to rest on her cheek. He’s surprised that she doesn’t object, she just lets him hold her.

Bobby thinks about how the girl who’d gone in for a handshake on their first meeting is now here cradling herself into his chest. Although she smells overwhelmingly of gin, he can also detect her floral scent. And the smell calms him.

She’s drunk, of course, and is less concerned with others’ perceptions and more prone to the waterworks, but it still feels poignant that she’s letting him—encouraging him to hold her.

Bobby thinks about the first night he’d walked her home, pulling her into a hug and how she’d let herself melt into it for just a moment. How she’d held his hand and danced with him when he’d offered her to. How she pretends she’s opposed to contact but seems to appreciate and enjoy it.

And now she’s here, with him, in her time of need. 

He doesn’t care about the growing wet patch on his shoulder, or the forgotten film on tv, or the fact that she still hasn’t told him what happened with Noah. All he cares about right now, is making sure she’s okay. Letting her be not-okay.

After a while, Lexi’s cries slow and she looks up at Bobby. Her head adjusts its angle but stays laying on his shoulder.

“Bobby—” but her words hitch and she can’t finish. She doesn’t know how to say it, how to thank him properly for everything. ‘Thank you’ doesn’t feel like enough. He’d just been there over and over and never asked for anything in return. Not really. Lexi still isn’t entirely sure why she’s ended up at Bobby’s, but it feels right. 

He wants to know what she was going to say, but pressing doesn’t feel acceptable in this moment. And she’s drunk, anyway, so it’s likely that her thought processes aren’t straight. 

Her face looks up at his from where it rests against his body. The contact of her on him is something he’s very aware of. Her hand rests on his chest and he’s glad she’s drunk and can’t feel the way his heart beats out of it.

Lexi is still considerably impaired, but Bobby’s face remains in focus somehow. He’s wearing a kind smile and those freckles and those dimples tease her. He’s so beautiful. She always seems to forget until his face is right by her, and she’s hit with this wave of admiration and… well, affection. 

Her eyes flick down to that smile, the way his lips spread, and suddenly she’s hyper-aware of their proximity. Aware of the fact that he’s got her close and she’s already feeling better just knowing he’s there. She gulps, not fully thinking as she moves a little closer to him. As her eyes settle on his parted lips set in that gorgeous smile.

And then Lexi’s phone pings. Twice. She reaches back to pull it from her pocket and plops it down on Bobby’s stomach, burying her face once again in the crook of his shoulder. She doesn’t want to focus on the thoughts she’d just had running through her mind.

“Here, I can’t see.” It’s true, her eyes are far too unfocused to be able to respond to a text message properly. 

“You want me to reply?”

She just nods. So he opens up her messages.

**Chelsea:** Where are you?

**Priya:** so we’re a bit miffed but we need to know you’re safe Lexi

So Bobby types back:

**Lexi:** hey this is bobby she’s with me and safe

He figures it isn’t his place to say much more. They need to have that conversation between them. He feels he knows the girls’ dynamic well enough that he can be pretty certain they’ll forgive her. Lexi, in what seems to be a habit these days, is just feeling guilty for not being fully transparent. And, too drunk to see things rationally.

“You can tell me what it says in the morning.”

_ In the morning. _ The implication that she’ll still be here then warms Bobby’s stomach in a way that’s beginning to feel familiar, and sends his brain into overdrive.

“Okay, here,” he hands the phone back to her and she clumsily stuffs it back in her jeans pocket.

“I’ll grab us a cuppa and we can turn some shitty movie on, yeah?” he suggests, pulling her head off him for a moment. He misses the contact, but ultimately he hopes this will be a good call. And, well, maybe she’ll be here until the morning anyway.

She sniffs as she says, “Yeah that sounds perfect. Thanks Bobby.”  _ You’re too good to me. I still need to say thank you. I still need to tell you how much this means to me. _

Bobby ambles over to the kitchen and pops the kettle on. The sound of the water boiling gives him a chance to fall into a sort of hole of thinking. The reminder that Lucas, despite his absence, is still a relevant part of Lexi’s life disarms him a little. He’s just angry. Angry that Lucas wouldn’t listen, that Noah did what he did, that Lexi seems hellbent on twisting everything to be her own fault. And sort of angry that he’s feeling this way.

Sure, as her friend he has a right to care about her and protect her and defend her. But it feels… different. More, somehow. The fact that he’s frustrated with himself for being angry at two other guys involved in and having fucked up in Lexi’s life…  _ click. _

The kettle boils and he pours the hot water into two mugs over the tea bags and sugar. He then adds a splash of milk and stirs them before taking the bag out after steeping a few minutes.

As he looks over to the sofa, he realises Lexi’s head isn’t visible anymore. He takes the two cups of tea over to the sofa, and as he nears hears the soft snores coming from the girl laid there. He sets the teas down on the coffee table.

She’s fallen asleep.

Slumped into the arm of his old sofa, face still red but more peaceful looking. Arms plastered close to her chest, as though protecting herself. He saw some of her walls come down tonight, and the thought that she feels comfortable enough to share her vulnerabilities with him lights something deep within him. Maybe he feels he can share in return, too. 

Although fully clothed, it is still late January and Lexi looks a little chilly. So Bobby quietly retreats to his bedroom and takes the duvet off his bed. It’s an old set from his Dad, funny little illustrations of the Loch Ness monster coming out of the ‘water’ that is the blue of the cover. It reminds him of home when he feels a little homesick. He doesn’t care in the slightest that it may seem a little childish, it’s not like anyone sees it. Well, until Lexi. 

Ordinarily he would offer her the bed, but he doesn’t feel right moving her once she’s finally asleep over fears of waking her. She needs the rest after being so upset. Who knows if she’s a light sleeper or not? Taking a pillow and the duvet, Bobby goes back to his main room. 

As gently as he can, he places his duvet over her and tucks her in. She doesn’t stir, except when one of her hands grabs onto the top of the duvet and pulls it closer around her, eliciting a twinkly smile from Bobby. Carefully, ever so slowly, he lifts her head enough to place the pillow under it, noticing that as he pulls his hand back, she tries to nuzzle into it a little. Wishing he’d let her.

Disregarding that she’s drunk and more affectionate than normal, he takes the throw from the back of the sofa, leans down to sit on the floor by her knees, and wraps it around himself.

Bobby sees her like that, so serene, so still. His heart swells at her peace. Still-damp eyelashes kiss her reddened cheeks, her lips are slightly parted where she breathes from them. Lips he can’t seem to take his eyes off.

He finds himself with a weird impulse to watch intently to make sure she doesn’t stop breathing, watching each rise and fall of her body beneath the duvet. It calms him. 

And his eyes drift back to her face. Eyes he’d stared into many a time, the ones that always seem to be staring back, are closed and damp and a lump starts to form in his throat. It grows as his gaze floats back down to her lips, lips he’d looked at on first meeting as a conquest, as something he’d love to kiss. Shit, he really had been all for it. Then when he’d suggested their little arrangement, those desires went to camp out at the back of his mind instead, waiting. Waiting until New Years Eve, until he danced with her up close, until just now on his sofa when he’d dreamed she was thinking about it too.

The fact of the matter is, Bobby had been Lexi’s thought when she needed support. She’d cradled into him the way she had, and he still feels the damp spot on his shoulder. A badge of the way she trusts him.

As he watches her, watches her breathe and sleep peacefully, he notices just how warm he feels. That he has an ache in his heart and a clench in his stomach and a soreness in his throat.

A sudden, terrifying realisation washes over Bobby. He likes Lexi. More than in a friendly way.

He really  _ likes _ her.


	30. Sunny Side Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi wakes up in Bobby’s flat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Wings - Birdy  
> Bright - Echosmith  
> Like The Dawn - The Oh Hellos

The next morning finds Lexi’s eyes blinking open with difficulty as though they’ve been closed shut with glue. For a moment, she’s disconcerted with her surroundings, until a familiar scent catches her and immediately calms her—she’s at Bobby’s flat. And, tucked up around her, is what appears to be his duvet. Her sore eyes crinkle up as she smiles at the details on the cover. They’re bright blue with illustrations of a cartoon green Loch Ness monster patterned throughout. It might just be the sweetest thing she’s ever seen. Simultaneously something she’d never expect Bobby to have, yet also incredibly Bobby. It may not have fit her initial impression of him; yet as she’s grown to know him—it’s exactly his kind of thing. She pulls it up around herself and inhales the scent.

Noticing a figure right by her knee, Lexi starts a little. Bobby’s head lays on the edge of the sofa, incredibly close to her legs. There’s a thin throw wrapped around him and his hands rest delicately on his knees. He’s still wearing the clothes he was in yesterday, which surprises Lexi. Did he really just go to sleep like that? When his bed is right next door? In a threadbare throw in the ends of winter?  _ On the floor?  _

_ Fuck.  _ She remembers what a state she’d been in last night. Luckily for Lexi, she’s not easily embarrassed. Crying into her fake date’s shirt about having lied to her friends about fucking her manager might be a new low, though. She is grateful she didn’t vomit, but there is an intense queasy feeling in her stomach. She pulls the duvet up again and tries to focus on that instead.

Bobby looks so peaceful. No smirk, no witty comeback or silly joke, just completely tranquil and sweet looking. No flirty remark or expression to make her stomach go, but for some reason, it’s still fluttering at the sight of him sleeping there. Just being.

After a short while just admiring him, he stirs; face scrunching up and eyes fluttering. She feels nervous for some reason. Having to greet him and all. Would he reveal her saying something embarrassing she couldn’t remember?

“Morning,” he yawns, smiling as soon as he sees her watching him, and stretching his arms up. It’s kind of cute how his face contorts, and Lexi can’t help but admire the way his biceps tense where his sleeves slip up at the action. He’s very nicely toned, who can blame a girl for looking?

“Morning,” she says quietly, adjusting herself so that she can look at him properly. “Did you really sleep there?”

“I did,” he stretches some more and stands; he doesn’t really feel ready yet to share his motivations for sleeping in that spot. “And now I’m hungry. Breakfast?”

“Ah, no, Bobby I couldn’t. You’ve done enough already. Plus, I’m pretty hungover.”

“Then breakfast is exactly what you need! It’s decided.”

She sighs, knowing there's not much she can do to convince him otherwise. He needs to eat, anyway.

Bobby picks up the two mugs of tea from the coffee table that had been abandoned the night before, and it sparks a memory in Lexi. She remembers Bobby going to make them, and then she must’ve passed out. Oops.

“I’m sorry for falling asleep here. You should’ve kicked me out. I mean, you shouldn’t have even let me in in the first place when I was that tragic.”

“What are you talking about?” he laughs from the kitchen, “of course I wasn’t going to kick you out.”

“And I stole your duvet! It’s not fair on you.”  _ And now you’re making me breakfast, looking absolutely adorable and still half-asleep. _

“You didn’t steal shit, you’re my mate. Now just shut up and let me make these eggs.”

She sighs and slumps back down into the sofa, pulling his covers up around her once more. Hopefully food will ease the turning in her stomach.

—-

Lexi pushes the scrambled eggs round her plate, still feeling ridiculously queasy. She’d managed her way through the butter-laden toast already. But she appreciates Bobby’s efforts to make her breakfast after having practically crashed into his place and slept on his couch too much not to eat them. And they are fucking good eggs.

“You’re a bit like an egg, aren’t you?” she muses, wondering if she’s still a little tipsy. Bobby’s sat beside her, already finished his food.

“Lass, if this is your way of trying to say you wanna poach me I’m not sure it’s the best way to go about it.”

She chuckles. “No, like you have a hard shell but a gooey interior.”

“Ew. That’s kinda gross.” But he’s blushing. “I’ll take it. If you were an egg you’d be a fried egg. Pretty on the outside and covered in butter.”

She raises an eyebrow. “I think most people cook their eggs in oil.”

“Yeah but that doesn’t sound so appealing.” He moves to rest his arms over the back of the sofa.

“You’re a dork.”

“You started the egg analogy, I’m just playing along.”

She swallows a bite and turns to him, twisting up one side of her face in a smug smile. “So you think I’m pretty?”

“Well, yeah. I’m not blind.”

She isn’t sure what response she expected, but it wasn’t that. Not something so seemingly obvious and factual; maybe a flirty quip or a silly joke. So she’s slightly alarmed, but doesn’t let on.

“As pretty as a fried egg,” she laughs.

“At least I didn’t call you gooey on the inside.”

“That’s because I’m not gooey.”

“No? Not even the slightest bit soft…?” he mocks, nudging an elbow at her, knowing they both know she’s absolutely soft. She stuffs some egg in her mouth, immediately regretting it when it sets her stomach off again and she has to shut her eyes to swallow it down.

Bobby notices this, and says, “I’m making you some tea.”

“Bobby, I’m going to have to tie your hands together to stop you doing things for me.”

“I might like that,” he winks. Her stomach flutters. As odd as the thought makes her feel, she might like that too. 

He stands to go to the kitchen. As Bobby boils the kettle, Lexi does her best to fold up his duvet neatly. Soon enough the tea is ready and Bobby brings it over to the sofa, setting them down where they’d been forgotten the night before. 

With a large gulp, Lexi finally looks to Bobby to ask him something she’s been concerned about.

“Do you have my phone, Bobby?”

“You don’t remember?” he laughs.

“No—yes—I mean I remember you texting the girls and putting it back in my pocket, but it’s not there…”

“Oh?” Concern flashes his face. “That’s weird. Probably fell down the back of the sofa or something.” 

She starts to move about a little to lift up the edge of the cushions. 

“At least finish your tea first,” he chuckles. 

They finally find Lexi’s phone, but she’s too afraid to check her messages. She’s not ready. 

Bobby goes to wash up the mugs. He feels a little flustered that Lexi’s still here. After his revelation last night, he’s been so nervous about how he’s going to navigate everything. So, he really likes the girl currently curled up on  _ his _ sofa, in  _ his _ flat. And what’s he going to do about it? His gut is telling him: absolutely nothing. Because he’s scared. He’s not had feelings for someone in forever, certainly never been caught so off guard by the fact he liked someone like he had been last night. And yes, he’s confident. He’s flirty. He’s good with girls! But they’re rarely girls he gives a shit about. 

His general instinct seems to be to just keep doing what he’s always done, except now the tingling at each touch and the missing her when she isn’t there has a reason. Blaring front and centre in his brain. 

Because he can’t do anything—won’t do anything—until whatever is happening with Lucas reaches a conclusion. He’s not that guy.

He is however, the kind of guy who is curious for information. 

“It’s almost Valentine's Day,” he calls from the kitchen, and immediately regrets it. What’s his angle here?

“Ugh. Don’t remind me.” He watches her stand and pause a minute, before coming over to lean her hip against the island counter.

“Anti V-Day?”

“It’s fine, I guess. Just a big fat reminder of how eternally single I am and probably will be for the rest of my days.”

He watches as she leans further into the counter, slumping somewhat. “Don’t be stupid. You’ll find someone.”

“Yeah, tell that to my failure of a love life.”

“Have you even looked in a mirror?” he says before he can think about it. “And anyway, some guys like a sharp shooter.”

“Hm. None that I know. It’s like, I don’t wanna worry about my romantic future, but everyone else keeps telling me I should be.”

It’s obvious they’re both thinking about the Lucas thing, but not saying anything.

“You’re gonna be fine.”

“I hate that I basically have two choices in life. Find someone I like and get married and have babies and be ‘normal,’ or become a spinster old cat lady,” she rants.

“I can see you with cats.”

“I don’t get it! I like cats!! Why do people think it’s sad to live alone with a bunch of cats?”

“Misogyny? Does it matter? As long as you’re happy you’re going to be perfectly fine.”

“Oh and then there’s the issue of actually falling in love. I don’t know if it’s possible! And I can’t marry someone I don’t love. It’s all very well being loved but I have to love them back.”

“Would you stop!” he laughs, stepping up to her and placing his hands on her fleshy cheeks. “You’re 23. You’ll figure it out. And I know you’re not gonna do shit just because people are telling you you should. You  _ will _ fall in love one day, whether you decide to keep it or not.”

She feels herself blush under his touch, unable to stop her eyes from bulging out of her face like a fish. Something about him assuring her she’d fall in love sends her brain into overdrive. And something about him saying it makes Lexi pretty sure of another thing: she can’t say for certain that she’s in love with Lucas. Now, or ever before. And maybe that makes sense, they barely had much of a chance for a connection, after all - they’d never dated, or done a lot other than physical stuff. But still, it feels a pertinent point in Lexi’s brain at this moment. 

Even more clear in this moment, is that Lexi never told Lucas she liked him. Not in those words. Not out loud. And that fact, after everything, feels like a big one. Really feels like it means something. Why had she never told him properly that she liked him? With Bobby cupping her face and looking down at her  _ like that _ she decides that her brain is probably a little foggy, though, and not to make these revelations so conclusive until she can think straighter.

She lets out a weak laugh and steps back to create some much needed distance.

“That’s it. I’m swearing off alcohol for a while. Clearly it gets me existential, and I still feel like I’m going to throw up.”  _ But that might have more to do with the proximity… _

He clears his throat, suddenly aware of the space between them. “Yeah, that might be wise.”

“I need to like, change and brush my teeth and stuff, but I’m still nervous about going home.”

“You can do that stuff here. I don’t mind.”

“Well I didn’t exactly pack an overnight bag. I wasn’t planning on burdening you so much.”

“You’re not a burden, for fuck’s sake,” he chuckles, as he disappears into his bathroom.

He emerges a moment later holding a bottle of mouthwash. “I don’t exactly keep a spare toothbrush about, but this might help a bit.”

“Cheers, Bobby.”

—-

Bobby and Lexi pretty naturally fall into spending the day watching terrible films on TV. There’s a horror marathon on, and they laugh at the effects and storylines. Bobby doesn’t admit to Lexi that he’s maybe slightly scared of horror films. Or that her presence is meaning he doesn’t feel so afraid. He’s only watching them because she said they amuse her, and he wants her to feel better. They laugh and snack and Bobby keeps feeding Lexi glasses of water so that she’s well hydrated in her hangover, leading to a lot of pee breaks. 

Not so long after, they start to get hungry; somehow they’ve made it all the way to dinner time, so Bobby whips up a quick risotto while Lexi watches from the kitchen stools. She’d tried to offer to cook, but he was having none of it. So she takes her job as ‘tell me what’s in the tabloids’ by going through all the magazine Snapchat stories and reading about the latest cheating scandal or lip filler fail. And very pointedly avoiding her text messages.

Once the food is made they settle back onto the couch to eat and continue their long stream of films. 

But the horror movies have come to an end, and next up is a romcom. It’s  _ The Ugly Truth,  _ a film that’s neither here nor there in Lexi’s mind. It’s fine. They finish up their food and pop their plates on the table.

“Thanks, Bobby. For the food, for everything. Thank you so much.”

He smiles. “My pleasure.” And that smile tells Lexi that he really means it. He doesn’t see her as a burden.

Of course, he’s actually loved having her here. Just spending time with her essentially doing nothing. As he feels himself start to get lost in her pull again, he turns back to the telly.

“He’s so bad at this,” Bobby mocks as Gerard Butler explains the art of women on the TV.

“Oh, absolutely. Like you could do any better, though?” she snorts.

“I absolutely could.”

And the words are out of her mouth before she has a chance to second guess them; “Then prove it.”

He grins so smugly, and begins to move in towards her. She hadn’t expected him to do it, not really. Not right there and then. But there he is, leaning into her, and she’s not budging. The hair on the back of her neck prickles as he comes closer, and when his hot breath ghosts her ear, her eyes shut involuntarily. Nervous about what he’s planning, but also sort of curious, she doesn’t move. He pulls a hand up, resting it on her cheek before slowly drawing a tendril of hair behind her ear. Every spot he brushes feels as though it’s in flames. He leans in even further so that his nose is on her skin and it goosebumps as he whispers in her ear, “Not when you’re expecting it.”

Far too soon, he moves away and leans his arm over the back of the sofa, smirking because he absolutely knows he can do better, has done better, and will do better when he catches her off guard. He’d barely even been trying just then, but his point seems at least slightly proven. She’s still staring straight at him, but he doesn’t miss the way her throat moves as she swallows down her thoughts.

_ Holy shit.  _ Lexi knows she shouldn’t have provoked him. He’s never been one to turn down a challenge. Deep down she knows that. Yeah, she should’ve predicted he’d make a meal out of it—it’s in his nature. In his very fibre, Bobby is dramatic in the most cool and collected way. He loves to make people sweat. Her first impressions of him had been that he’s a master of seduction somehow and she doesn’t know why she doubted that he had good moves. That was… intense. The smallest of movements on his part really, yet it felt like a big thing. Feeling his breath on her ear and his nose brushing her cheek, she’s reminded of when he’d come up to her in the club all those months ago. But then… things are different now. And she should’ve expected it. Though… maybe she had? Maybe that’s the problem.

She shakes it off and they turn their attention back to picking holes in Gerard Butler’s techniques. 

The film continues on as most of the day had, some laughing and mocking of the film, but there’s a tension in the air from the nature of the film and the moment they’d had. 

When it finally ends, Bobby turns the screen off, and turns his attention to Lexi. 

“So, it’s pretty late. Do you want to stay again? You can have the bed this time,” he asks, kind of already mentally planning the night and the next day.

“No, it’s okay. I really should be getting home. I can’t put this conversation off forever.” She stands and stretches, making a move for the door.

“It’s gonna be fine,” he reassures her, “you’ve got this.”

They stand opposite each other at the threshold, just smiling. Neither of them want to make the move. Do they hug? They haven’t done that since the first night. But, they’ve danced together and that feels more intimate. Do they shake hands? A little prudish perhaps. Or, do they just say goodbye and leave it there? That’s what they settle on, in the end.

“I’ll see you soon?” he asks as he opens the door for her.

She nods. “Thank you, again.”  _ I can’t seem to articulate how good you’ve been to me, so this will have to do.  _

As she leaves and walks away from the door, not looking back for reasons unknown, she starts to feel lonely already. 


	31. Crossing A One Way Bridge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi invites Bobby for lunch to thank him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> putting a spin on everybody talks - egg  
> Lullaby - Paradise Fears  
> My Tears Are Becoming A Sea - M83

When Lexi returns home, she’s met by slightly tearful two best friends. She tells them everything, from start to finish. How she’d slept with Lucas on the first night, how he’d pied her off, how she’d been pining for him stupidly for so long (which of course they already knew), how Bobby had proposed the fling, how she’d agreed and then how Lucas had kissed her. How they’d fallen into some sort of situation, which was broken on New Years when Noah had kissed her. And finally, where she’s at now, with Lucas avoiding her again and Bobby picking up the pieces. The girls cry a little at how much she’d kept from them and how hard she must’ve found it all, and Lexi finds herself in a lovely warm Priya-and-Chelsea sandwich. Bobby had of course been right; they weren’t angry, just a little upset at how she’d avoided the conversation.

“Hang on, sorry, just to clarify,” Priya crinkles her eyebrows, “you haven’t done anything with Bobby? Like, not even kissed?”

“For the thousandth time tonight - no!! It’s not real,” Lexi laughs. Priya looks at Chelsea in disbelief.

“There is way too much chemistry between you for there to be nothing.”

“There’s nothing,” she reiterates firmly.

“Hm. Okay.” Priya nods, but gives Chelsea a knowing smirk.

—-

On Sunday 7th February, Lexi has invited Bobby around for dinner with the girls. It’s her way of saying thank you for everything. For spending time with her, keeping her entertained, distracting her, letting her crash at his and feeding her and watching horror films with her. She’s making a roast and the kitchen is abuzz with the hissing sounds of the hob rings, the low hum from the oven, and chopping vegetables. Priya and Chelsea sit at the counter, occasionally lending a hand. Chelsea juices some oranges for the carrots, while Priya takes each orange skin and carefully peels it to add to cocktails later.  _ Helpful. _

“So… Valentine’s Day is a week away…” Priya muses, focused on the peeler in her hands.

“And?” Lexi responds, busying herself with moving around the potatoes in the oven.

“And…” Priya turns to Chelsea, who nods and picks up her cue.

“And you have two handsome male suitors!”

“Oh god.” Lexi should’ve known after they’d asked about what was  _ really _ going on with Bobby so many times that they would be like this. 

“Come on! Who’s it going to be?”

“No one! I’m working.”

“So Lucas will be there… what about Bobby?”

“Bobby’s my vote,” Chelsea says, “he’s so fun! And we can watch  _ Gilmore Girls _ with him.”

“ _ Chels… _ ”

“At least, like, send a sexy pic or something,” Priya suggests. 

“To Bobby? Not in a million years. If I sent that man anything slightly risqué he would never stop taking the piss.”

“What?? You’ve got amazing boobs, why would he laugh? I don’t mean a nude.”

“Because we’re not actually seeing each other, random titty pics would be weird.”

“Well, obviously you’d ask first!! No one wants an unsolicited picture.”

“Or I could just… not be weird? It’s just another day and I’m not asking someone I’m  _ just friends _ with.”

“Or just a cute flirty message…”

“If you don’t ask Bobby out—I will!” Chelsea says defiantly. 

Lexi snaps her head around and her mouth falls open a little; there’s a sudden clutching at her chest and she has no clue how to respond. 

“ _ For you,  _ silly! But that reaction tells us all we need to know,” she giggles. 

“Valentine’s Day is just another money grabbing scheme, and I’m not going to ask anyone out.  _ I’m working, _ ” Lexi repeats.

“Working on your chat up lines!” Priya laughs, and she and Chelsea high-five each other.  _ God I love them but sometimes I wish I’d never told them. _

And then, the doorbell rings.  _ Saved by the bell. Sort of.  _

Lexi isn’t sure how her friends will act now that they think Bobby’s someone she’s interested in and not actually dating. 

“Speak of the devil,” Priya smirks with a wink, standing with a bounce to go and let him in. Lexi wipes her hands on her apron and takes it off, then pats her hair down so that it looks okay, and straightens out her jeans. She feels weirdly nervous knowing Bobby’s on the other side of that door. Knowing she’ll see his face in a few seconds. Sure, she’d only seen him two nights ago when he’d walked her home, but still. 

Priya opens the door and a beaming Bobby is on the other side. He wears a black silk floral shirt, long sleeves rolled up to his elbows, with his black skinny jeans. A gold chain adorns his neck and his usual rings sit on his fingers. Eyes casting over the two in front of him, searching, Bobby’s gaze finally lands on Lexi just by the kitchen, where she’s hanging back. That telltale smirk appears as he drags his eyes up her body. Appraising her simple jumper-under-pinafore outfit. Something he’d done a couple of times before, but somehow it feels different. A lot about him feels different right now, and they haven’t even spoken yet. There’s something going on in that pretty little head of his for sure, and Lexi wants to know.

What she doesn’t know, of course, is the way Bobby’s stomach flutters at the sight of her. That he’s thinking right now he’s just grateful to be in her hemisphere. Burning up the same energy as her. 

“Hey!” Priya grins, holding the door open wide. Bobby draws her in for a hug, only just getting a chance to pull away before the bubbling blonde is jumping on him.

“Bobby!”

“Hey Chels!” he laughs, lifting her from the ground a little. Priya shakes her head in amusement. They break apart and he grins as he walks up to Lexi.

When he reaches her, he wraps his arms around her shoulders, settling his chin into her neck and holding her tight. She hadn’t really been expecting it, they still weren’t frequent huggers, but she wraps her own arms around his waist anyway. She feels the smooth silky material under her palms, the scent of Bobby’s perfume wafting from the pulse point behind his ear. The shape of his body beneath the material. Involuntarily, Lexi’s eyes shut, a little lost in the sensations. And thankful, so thankful. That’s why he’s here, after all, to thank him for all he’s done. But she’s hoping the way she’s hugging him back tells him that too. She doesn’t want to let go, comfortable and protected in his arms, but she has to. She doesn’t need another reason for Priya and Chelsea to take the piss.

As he pulls away, the look in his eyes and the way he shakes his head ever so slightly tells her:  _ it’s all already been said. _

“Now, I don’t want to make comparisons, but you’ve got a pretty high bar. Gary’s nan makes the best roast I’ve ever had, and I’m a bit of a roast connoisseur myself.”

“You’ve got nothing to worry about, Bobby,” smirks Priya, something conspiratorial in her eyes. Lexi raises an eyebrow at her, which she replaces swiftly when Bobby looks back to her.

“I trust that,” he grins, hands on hips.

Lexi serves up the food while Chelsea and Priya go over to the latter’s to set up her dining table. Since Lexi and Chelsea don’t have one, it makes more sense given there are four of them.

They all travel over the hall and start to dig in.

There is a comfortable silence broken by the odd remark, question, or joke, and feels very natural. They discuss work, their memories of roasts in years gone by, and Bobby makes a few silly quips.

After a while, Priya turns to Bobby and clears her throat. 

“Thanks for looking after our girl, Bobby,” she smiles, one that Lexi recognises as supportive and grateful.

“Of course. I suppose she’s kind of my girl too, now.” He looks at her as he stuffs a bit of potato into his mouth.  _ My girl.  _ It feels strange in her head, but not out of place. The way he says that is making Lexi feel a certain way, and unsure how to respond. Maybe she chokes a little on the carrot she had been chewing on. Bobby notices this and continues, changing the subject for her sake, “Lexi, these roasties bang. And that’s saying a lot, because mine are amazing.”

“Right?” Chelsea jumps in, and launches into a long conversation about different types of potato.

They finish up their meals, everyone thanking Lexi for the food, and head back over to flat 598 to wash up.

“It’s kind of fun moving between our flats! Like we’re going on an adventure!” Chelsea enthuses.

“A taste adventure,” Bobby adds, to Chelsea’s delight. He stretches his arms out as he nears the sink.

“Don’t!” Chelsea jumps in front of him.

“Can I help?” Lexi asks. 

“No,” say Priya and Chelsea in unison.

“You cooked, and Bobby’s the guest so we’ll wash up. You go and do… whatever it is you do,” Priya waves her hand at them with a sly smile playing on her lips. No one can say no to Priya, and Lexi is feeling pretty tired anyway.

“Thanks babe.” Lexi nods and starts towards her bedroom, Bobby following behind. She turns to him. “Actually, I’ve got a gift for you.”

“You do? Dinner  _ and _ a gift?”

“Aren’t you a lucky boy?” she chuckles.

“You’ve no idea,” he mutters under his breath. She catches it, but doesn’t remark. She isn’t sure what she’d say. Is it to do with his luck with women? Does she want to know? Probably not, if she’s honest.

Bobby enters the room first, and Lexi follows and turns to shut the door. But as she turns back, Bobby is so close that she can barely move. Casting a shadow over her where the ceiling light behind him surrounds him like a halo. A small gasp escapes her lips, and his mouth twists up in amusement. Looking down at her with the smug grin she knows so well, he places his hands on the wall to the sides of her head. He’s so close, and around her in every direction, and she should feel claustrophobic. Should. But she always has been a fan of small spaces.

Every inch between the two of them feels like heavy air, like they can  _ see _ it. Like when you spray an aerosol and those little particles permeate the transparency with their scented chemically-ness. Lexi’s waiting for words to come out of her,  _ any _ words, but they don’t. What can she say? 

“Ever wonder if you want more?” Bobby asks breathlessly, moving one hand, where it hesitates a little just above her collarbone. Hovering where he’s unsure if she’s comfortable with the contact, yet just millimetres from touching it, and his hot breath on hers. It drags across the air above the space, and it’s like she can feel it through her clothes and on her skin anyway. He isn’t that much taller than Lexi, but at this moment it feels like he towers over her. She feels small, intimidated, in an intoxicatingly heady way. “Say the words and I’m there.”

_ What the hell is he playing at? _

She squeezes herself back into the door, ignoring the desire for him to move even closer. Because right now, one thing is very clear in her mind. And that is that she wants to say yes. She so badly wants to say yes. She wants to close the distance and feel the contours of Bobby’s plump lips on her own. Those lips that tease and smirk and say so many words she loves to hear. And those she loves to hate. How would they feel? How would kissing him feel? She can’t even believe she’s asking herself this. That she’s really in a position where she wants him to make a move. Wants to feel the way his hair is against her palm. The way his warm body presses against hers and his hand grips at her waist. Maybe she’s just thirsty. Probably. She’d always liked kissing. But…  _ Bobby?  _ Friend, fake-not-boyfriend, seen her snotty and crying? No, she’s just in her head about it. There’s no way she  _ really _ wants to kiss him.

_ My girl. Say the words and I’m there. Holy fucking shit. _

Bobby, infatuated with the girl and still trying to wrap his head around his feelings, has no trouble admitting to himself how much he enjoys this proximity. A breath yet a million miles away. Watching Lexi’s expressions change into something he thinks he might be addicted to. Parted lips, sparkling eyes still never backing down from the challenge he’s boring into them. He’s taken her by surprise, just as he’d wanted to. He won’t do anything unless she says, but the anticipation is killing him. The girl he has newfound feelings for is right there in front of him, staring at him in a newfound way. 

But she doesn’t do any of what she seems to want. She can’t. There are too many buts and ifs and potentials if she says those words. And she’s not sure right now she can do too much wondering. _Oh god, those lips._ _Shit._ But she doesn’t. Of course she doesn’t. Instead she grabs his jaw with her hand, smooshing his cheeks together. 

“Get lost,” she whispers, laughing lightly, masking the desire in her. The heavy feeling of the situation deep in her stomach. 

Bobby chuckles under his breath, his face tingling where she’d just touched. He removes his hand from her collarbone, her skin instantly biting against the cold from lack of contact, the other hand removing from beside her head and letting the space cloud around her. Then he leans back into a mocking curtsy.

“As you wish.” 

He can’t help but grin at the expression on Lexi’s face. Dazed, sedated. Like she’s coming down from something. And as much as he loves her wide eyes and stern lip, something about the opposite is incredibly attractive. Part of him wants to see her like that all the time. To  _ cause _ that expression. Hazy and wanting, pupils dilated so the grey becomes more black, eyelashes hooding and shadowing over. Lips parted in a way he could just lean over and kiss. It’s taking a lot to not just follow his desires and do as he pleases. 

_ I might like her a lot, but I can’t do that while she’s still figuring things out with Lucas. For all our sakes. I just hope she hurries the fuck up _ .

Lexi’s still leaning against the door, trying to pretend her chest isn’t rising and falling in a crazy obvious way. Bobby is looking smug as ever and she hates how that makes her want to go through with it even more. She gets it now. Gets how he schmoozes his way through life with flings at his feet. As much as she doesn’t want to admit it, Bobby is damn good at this.

The air still hangs heavy between them, lost words and buried thoughts. Holding the weight of the change.

Nothing had happened, but it still feels like they can’t go back from that moment. Like they’ve crossed a line. Something has changed. Something’s been changing for a long time, but this is like the clicker on a spinning wheel falling into the next section. 

Maybe they could stop before things went too far. Or maybe they’d already passed that point.


	32. The Allegory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi and Bobby react to where they left things. Valentine’s Day comes along.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Let’s Fall In Love For The Night - FINNEAS  
> Racing Stripes - Bombay Bicycle Club  
> this is how you fall in love - Jeremy Zucker, Chelsea Cutler

“I mean, you dared me,” Bobby laughs as he sets himself down on the edge of Lexi’s bed, trying to keep up a modicum of normalcy. Kind of hard, given that he’d just almost kissed the girl he likes. Told her he’d do it if she’d let him. Lexi comes over to sit on the bed and leans on the pillows, deliberately away from Bobby. But he scoots up to join her.

Completely shocked by the whole experience, Lexi hadn’t even remembered until now that yes, she had dared him. She sees herself in her head taunting him:  _ Prove it _ , and suddenly the confusing thoughts she’d been thinking before make her feel silly. Of course he hadn’t actually been trying it on. He was just looking to prove himself. Mentally she’s hitting herself for even flirting with the idea.

“I’m not going to boost your ego, mate. Yes, okay, Gerard Butler in  _ The Ugly Truth _ is a bit of a misogynist, so at least you’ve got that going for you.”

“My game’s better,” he says, leaning into her again with a cheeky smirk on his face.

“Oh lord.” 

“I can see it. You know it.”

“Or not,” she scoffs, lying through her teeth. Of course she can. But he’s not getting that out of her—she may never hear the end of it. 

“I think we both know I’ve got a high success rate. Even some you know have fallen into my charms…”

Lexi does a double take, unable to conceal the confusion and shock on her face. “What? Who?”

“Like your friend Hannah. The one obsessed with romance. You know she talked to me for ages on New Years?”

“No? God, that night’s a blur; it was a little eventful for me,” she laughs, shaking off the memory. “So, what did she say, and why?”

“She asked if I was single and then I kind of zoned out; I had… other plans… unfortunately those got interrupted.”

“What plans?”

Not wanting to tell her he’d been trying to kiss her, he ignores it and continues, “She was saying that  _ The Great Gatsby _ is, like, her romance goal, or something.”

“What?” Lexi laughs, obviously distracted from her previous train of thought and prepared to go on about this. “Seriously?”

“Yeah, why?” he coaxes. He knows he’s putting her off his scent, that she’ll have opinions and forget about his ‘plans.’ And honestly? He likes listening to her.

“Gatsby isn't a romance. Jay and Daisy had something when they were eighteen, but she married someone else while all he did was pine for her. And she doesn’t even stay with him when he saves her ass, she runs away with Tom again. It’s so sad. Not to mention Nick and Jordan, who he says he’s ‘halfway in love’ with. That’s not love. You know when you’re in love.”

“You do?”

“Well, yeah? None of those characters had any kind of healthy or requited love.”

“Do you know what it feels like?”

“… I… I don’t know…” she stutters, caught completely off guard by the question. 

“But you just said you would,” he teases, looking up at her with a light smirk. The eye contact, after their near miss, feels weighted.

“What I’m saying is, that Hannah hasn’t read  _ The Great Gatsby.  _ At least not read it and understood it. And if she wants to impress people with classic novels,  _ that _ should not be her pick—everyone and their dog’s read it.”

“Cutting.” He raises an amused eyebrow.

“Sorry. She’s great, but her book talk infuriates me. Don’t get me started on the time she said Jean Valjean was a romantic hero.”

“Oh?” 

“Oh god. She once tried to tell me that Frankenstein terrorised people,” she says in disbelief. 

“Uhhh?”

“That’s Frankenstein’s Monster—very important difference. Dr Frankenstein was the creator, The Monster was the created.”

“Right.”

“Sorry, I keep going off on one, don’t I?” She’s mostly aware that she’s talking a little too much as a result of trying to move away from their moment. She can’t entirely tell if it’s working. But he’s sitting beside her, if not a touch too close, watching and listening--so either it is, or that look is a way to further taunt her.

He smiles wide. “Please, go on.” At least she isn’t wondering what his New Years plans had been. Or that they’d been in line with his hopes from only a few moments ago.

“No, you don’t need to listen to that,” she laughs, her hair moving around her face as she shakes her head slightly. “What were we saying before?”

“So, you had a gift for me?”

“Oh yeah!” She jumps up from the bed, and rummages around in her bedside table. Then she pulls out a wrapped rectangular box, the wrapping paper blue with green snakes on. The symbolism isn’t lost on him, but he also doesn’t particularly want to alert her to his thinking in case she’s making fun of him. Something in her patient smile tells him she isn’t, though. He looks at her dubiously and takes it.

“I couldn’t find Nessie,” she smiles. 

“Wait. Nessie?”

Her face falls a bit. “Yeah, like, the Loch Ness monster? Like your duvet?”

“Yes! I know! Gary always takes the piss when I call her Nessie.”

“Oh!” she laughs, clearly relieved. “You confused me for a moment. She’s iconic, of course I call her affectionately.”

“We love to see it,” he beams, maybe wider than he should at such a simple conversation. Still, sharing a love for Nessie is definitely a good thing in his book. Bobby turns his attention back to the box in his hands before unwrapping it neatly. The box reads ‘PARKER’ and is sleek with a fancy decoration. He opens it up to reveal a simple silver ballpoint pen, with a tasteful ‘BM’ engraved at the top.

“It’s not much. And I know it’s not the most ‘you’ thing, but it felt right after the Science Museum. And I don’t know, maybe you could start up letter writing or… use it for recipes for the bakery,” she smiles and shrugs in the way people do when they’re unsure about a gift.

“Wow…” 

“Shit, sorry. It’s not you at all, is it?” Suddenly every other potential gift she could’ve bought invades her thoughts. Maybe he would’ve preferred a plush? A nice chain? He seems to like jewellery. Or… fancy whiskey?

“No! I love it. Maybe I  _ will _ start up letter writing. I’m definitely making excuses to use this.”

She nods, relieved. “Cool. At least now I sort of feel like I’ve evened the playing field after you’ve done so much for me.” She sits beside him again. 

“Don’t be silly.”

And then she looks at him with sincerity in her eyes, and Bobby’s whole body almost stops. “You mean a lot to me, Bobby. You really do.”

He’s not the best at concealing his emotions. So he’s pretty certain the shock he’s feeling is apparent on his face, despite his best efforts. Maybe having a crush on a girl who says things like this isn’t the best thing for his sanity. Someone who looks at him that way. Oh god. He’s spiralling again. Before he can say anything else, respond to let her know just how much she means to him too--she says something else.

“Just be glad they didn’t put an ampersand. Could’ve been a discount home store,” she jokes. Internally, Bobby backtracks. He doesn’t want to make her uncomfortable, so continues with the new train of conversation. Surely she knows he thinks the same of her.

“Hey! I like B&M!”

“Yeah, but not on a pen.” That playful smile she’s giving him isn’t doing amazing for his heart.

He clears his throat, takes her hand in his, winds out the pen, and writes in the centre of her palm. It’s a slightly odd sensation, her own hand held in Bobby’s. Wrist gently in his left, while his right moves over the palm. Brushing gently, warm, perhaps more intimate than intended. 

She watches as the shapes form from the ink to her skin. It’s a neat ‘LM.’ They’re matching now. 

She raises an eyebrow, then he pulls it further into himself and angles so that she can’t see what he’s writing. It tickles, and she tries not to laugh as he’s doing it, but fails.

Bobby’s revelling a fair bit in having her hand in his, even if it’s only to write on. A little cold, smaller than his, with chipped dark-blue nail polish. The gentle chimes of her laughter as he takes his time shaping the letters. It’s all heightened after the day’s events, but Bobby isn’t complaining.

When he brings her hand back in front of her, she sees what he’s written.

‘LM🖤BM’

“Oh great, we’re back in primary school,” she laughs, admiring the ink on her hand.

“Bobby and Lexi, sittin’ in a tree-” he starts to sing, but Lexi gets to the next part before he can.

“N-O-T-H-I-N-G,” she laughs.

“Ooh, that’s rough,” his eyes float to her door, and they both know exactly what he’s thinking.

Lexi struggles to think up a response. Because they  _ had _ almost kissed. At least, she’s fairly certain they had. Even though she believes Bobby was just proving himself, the fact of the matter still stands that they were close. She’s bad at these things. Figuring things out. Having been in a position where she’d let her thirst get the better of her.

The problem with pining over Lucas was that her hookups had become few and far between, and none at all since things had progressed between them.  _ Yes, that’s all that was. Boredom and thirst. _

“Yeah well, we don’t need a baby drinking alcohol.”

“A what?”

“You didn’t have that bit up in Scotland? The add on at the end about a baby drinking alcohol?”

“England is so fucked, mate,” he snorts.

“You got that right.”

And as they laugh together, falling back into their normal comfort, Bobby just can’t get the image of her face moments ago out of his mind. The thought that he really could’ve kissed her. Which means he also knows he wants to make a move. A bigger move, a better one. But it has to be planned—and well. 

Valentine’s is next week, he just needs to figure out a game plan.

_ How do I ask out a girl who’s still stuck on someone else? _

—-

Valentine’s comes around quickly enough, with Bobby’s poor attempts from the week going down the drain.

**Bobby:** you wanna hang on sunday?

**Lexi:** this sunday?

**Bobby:** duh

**Lexi:** can’t, it’s valentines day lol

For a moment, Bobby had worried about that one, until she texted again.

**Lexi:** we’ve got fancy cocktails and shit since it’s a holiday ig

**Lexi:** it’ll probably be the grossest thing ever but, oh well at least i’ll be hiding in the back

**Bobby:** oh!! oops lmao had no clue it was v day🥴🤦🏽♂️

**Bobby:** i think in that case gaz wants to go see lottie, so i’ll probs tag along

**Lexi:** haha have fun, you won’t see much of me

So with Lexi’s apparent naïveté and the fact she’d be a no show, he isn’t holding out a ton of hope. Even so, he’s just coming up to the bar with Gary by his side.

The latter had indeed wanted to come and see Lottie, as they had something planned for after work. Bobby had balked at the idea of them doing something until inevitably the early hours of the morning, before realising maybe he was getting old. Late nights were becoming less frequent these days.

They throw the door open, the immediate hit of warmth and the aroma of liquor and expensive perfume wafting up to them. A smell he is so accustomed to now, that he actually likes it a lot. A smell he associates with Lexi, among others.

“Oh god, mate. I’m already regretting this. Look at this shit,” Gary groans, pointing to the chalkboard where the special Valentine’s drinks are written up. Gary likes a cocktail, but he hates punny names. Well, he hates punny names that he himself hasn’t come up with. “Why couldn’t she work at The King’s Head?”

“Why couldn’t you work there?” Bobby chuckles, shoving his friend. It’s Gary’s local, the pub the two men met at.

“Yeah, fine. Whatever. Did you bring your flask?”

Bobby shakes his head as they perch in their usual spots at the bar. “Maybe, but I’m still gonna make you buy me a drink. You invite a guy out for Valentine’s—it’s a rule.”

“Aw, sorry. Forgot to pull your chair out for you.”

Bobby rolls his eyes and they watch as Lottie saunters over to them. He has to sit through the next few minutes of his friends flirting shamelessly with each other, having recently labelled themselves girlfriend and boyfriend. When Lottie leaves again to fetch their drinks, Bobby doesn’t even notice that he’s staring at the storeroom door until Gary nudges him.

“I really like her, y’know,” Gary says.

“Who? Lottie? I know, mate.”

“Don’t be an idiot.” He raises his eyebrows as he tilts his head in the direction of the door. 

Bobby sighs. Gary had heard most of the story—he’d had to confide in someone. So he knew the basics: the fake dating, the Lucas thing, the Noah thing, and the fact that Bobby and Lexi had been spending a lot more time together since then. He hadn’t told Gary about his newly discovered crush yet—that’s still fresh. Seems his friend knows him well despite that, though.

“I don’t know what you mean.” There’s no real point denying it, but Bobby’s head tells him to do so anyway.

“Sure. Just letting you know I approve of your crush.” Gary has never seen Bobby really like a girl before, but it’s obvious to him.

“It’s not a—”

“Mate, if it isn’t a crush, what’s that about?” he asks, motioning to the bag on the floor under Bobby’s feet.

“It’s part of the ruse.”

Gary nods mockingly, and Bobby sighs again in resignation. His friend knows him too well. 

Lottie returns with their drinks, and they talk and laugh through the night, the platinum-haired woman taking as many chances to speak to her boyfriend as possible. Unfortunately for Bobby, this also means she notices where his eyes seem to keep falling.

“I’ll see if I can grab her a moment,” she says out of the blue to him at one point.

“Huh?”

“Don’t be an idiot,” she echoes Gary’s words from earlier and Bobby finds himself worried he’s going to keep hearing the same thing twice now that they’re a couple. “I’ll only be able to get you a couple of minutes, so make it quick.” She turns and quickly hurries through the door. He hadn’t expected to see Lexi, not really, since he’d been planning to walk her home anyway. But there isn’t much he can do about it now. May as well take his moment.

Bobby gulps in anticipation. Then, Lottie glides back through, immediately rushing to the other side of the bar, calling: “Lucas!”

The man’s attention has been caught, and he engages in conversation with Lottie without even noticing as the door opens again.

Lexi walks out from the store room, a bit sweaty and stressed, eyes immediately falling on Bobby in his usual spot. And how he looks.

Bobby’s dressed for the occasion. He’s wearing a deep burgundy shirt, trademark top buttons undone where his freckled chest lays bare with just a gold chain. She can only see the top of his trousers, black jeans as usual, held up by a belt. His glass is held loosely in his hand where his rings sparkle from the sun bulbs above his head, and he’s got that signature smirk on. 

“Hey, what’s up?” she asks, stealing a glance at her manager.

“I just brought you something.”

“What? Bobby!” she says a little too loudly, before clearing her throat and continuing, “I literally bought you a gift to make us even, stop putting it off balance!”

He chuckles. “It’s just a small thing. It’s Valentine’s Day after all, needs to look like I got you something, right?”

The actual details of their arrangement currently are very hazy. Neither are sure if they’re still meant to be fake dating since Lucas seems to be unconvinced by any attempts of anything. Still, it feels like the best excuse in the moment for literally bringing her a Valentine’s gift.

He looks over to Lucas as though this is for his benefit, and says, “Just, show it off, yeah?”

She snatches it from him and shakes her head as she holds it down by her side, out of Lucas’ view.

“Later. Thank you for this.” She gives him a parting smile before hurrying back through the door. Bobby watches as the small ponytail bounces up and down a little in her wake. 

When she’s fully disappeared, Gary guffaws.

“You’re such a tosser.”

—-

After work, Bobby walks Lexi home. It may not be a Friday, but it makes sense since they’re both there. 

It’s the same as it always is these days: friendly banter, life-talk, discussing Gary and Lottie. Mostly avoiding the topic of Lucas.  _ Definitely _ avoiding anything relating to the two of them.

As they reach Lexi’s flat, Bobby lowers himself into a messy bow. “Here you go, Miss Mitchell.”

“Don’t go all regency on me again,” she laughs.

“Hey! I was under the impression you liked that. But the aim here was more ‘doorman.’” He waves his hands about dismissively.

“Alright, Jeeves. Thank you very much for dropping me off. And for this." Lexi hugs the wrapped gift to herself as she turns from him. 

She knows he won’t leave until she’s inside, so she just waves before opening the door to enter. 

“See you next week?” he asks.

“Yeah. See you next week.” 

The door shuts on him. Lexi’s fingers are antsy around the package she’s holding, nervous but excited. He said it’s small, but she’s still curious as to its contents. 

She unwraps it carefully since she wants to keep the paper, which is silver with cute cat and dog illustrations on. He always seems to know what she likes.

It’s a book.  _ The Notebook _ by Nicholas Sparks. She’s read it, of course. Slightly battered, as though it's secondhand (again, he’s obviously taken note), the edges clumping up a touch. She runs her hand over it, and opens up the cover. Inside, to her surprise, is a note. In neat, round penmanship, seemingly written with a good quality ballpoint pen. It’s Bobby’s handwriting, written with the pen she bought him. She gasps unintentionally as her eyes drag over the words.

_ To Lexi, I figured you’ve already read all of Austen so I got something else. This one’s actually romantic - I read the whole thing, cover to cover and all that. Might’ve cried a bit. Had to make sure we wouldn’t have another Gatsby situation. Bobby x _

It’s brief, and seemingly uneventful. But he’s read a book, a book he believes she’ll like, to check that it actually contains something it appears to because she was funny about Hannah’s claims. And all in a matter of a few days, she’s sure. He’s written inside it using the pen she bought him. It all feels very personal and Lexi isn’t too ashamed to admit that her eyes well up a little. That her throat tightens as she grasps it firm in her hand, imaging Bobby holding this in bed at night reading it, or sitting on his sofa--the one she’d slept on. Imagining him actually tearing up at it. Writing her a note, letting her know his thoughts and why he’d bought it. Wrapping it with care, with wrapping paper he’d picked out just for her.

Thoughtful gifts mean everything.

There’s something so personal about secondhand books, passed down from person to person, and now his words seared forever on the front page tie Lexi and Bobby’s story into that. Bound like the spine, hundreds of insanely thin pages glued together to create one piece of art.


	33. Full Stop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A long-avoided conversation is had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Playlist:  
> Make It Right - BTS, Lauv  
> Alewife - Clairo  
> Goodbye - Cage The Elephant

One day in late February, Bobby comes around to Lexi’s place just to hang out. It seems to be something they’re doing a lot these days all of a sudden. Not that either of them are complaining.

She’s sitting on her bed against the headboard, reading  _ In Search of Lost Time: The Way by Swann’s _ by Marcel Proust, while Bobby peruses her bookshelves. He smiles at his copy of  _ The Notebook  _ resting at the front.

“Oh! Dr Seuss! I’ve read these,” he exclaims, stroking a finger down the spine.

“You be careful with that spine,” she jokes.

“Hey, Lexi?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I borrow this?” he asks, holding up what it is for her to see. It’s a tin of Cocoa Butter Vaseline that had been sitting on the shelf. She shrugs.

“Sure.”

He puts some on before pocketing it, and Lexi breathes out a little laugh as she shakes her head to herself, returning to her book.  _ He’s so weird. _

“So, what’s in the lost time?”

“Huh?”

“The lost time. What’s it about?” he points to the object in her hand.

“Oh. It’s seriously dull. I don’t recommend it.”

“Then why are you reading it?” he chuckles.

“It’s on the list.”

“The… list?”

She blushes, pops the bookmark in, and closes it up. Then she leans across to her bedside table, pulling out from the drawer a paper-bound notebook, and hands it to Bobby. 

He opens it up to reveal hundreds of book titles. Some are crossed out with scruffy penmanship, page after page of lines, each with a new title to cross off.  _ Holy shit.  _

“This is so cool!”

“It’s a list of all the stuff I wanna read one day. Only problem is, it keeps getting longer.”

“I like it,” he smiles.

“But I kind of regret it. Proust, I mean. There’s seven volumes of this thing.” She picks it up lazily, turning her lip up at the cover. “I really mean it when I say it’s boring.”

“Read me some?”

“What?”

“Read me some!” he repeats. “I wanna see if you’re right.”

“Uh, okay, but be prepared for the world’s longest sentences.”

He shakes his head, assuming she’s overreacting, and slides onto the bed beside her, watching her as she goes to read.

She pushes her glasses up on her face—which is absolutely adorable—and clears her throat. As the words start to pour out of her, Bobby loses himself a bit in her smooth and expressive voice.

“ _ But, while each of these love affairs, or each of these flirtations, had been more or less complete fulfilment of a dream inspired by the sight of a face or of a body that Swann had spontaneously, without making any effort to do so, found charming, on the contrary when he was introduced to Odette de Crécy one day at the theatre by an old friend of his, who had spoken of her— _ ”

“Is this all one sentence?” he interrupts.

“I fucking told you!”

“Okay, okay. You can stop.”

But she doesn’t respond.  _ There’s no way I’m stopping now, he asked for this. _ Instead she just continues on, “ _ —as an entrancing woman with whom he might perhaps have some success, but making her out to be more difficult—” _

“Lexi!” he laughs, reaching across to grab the book.

She slides out of his way, holding him back with one arm while holding the book with the other, slips of laughter coming out of her. His hands reach across her body to grab it, but he can’t quite get there.

_ “—than she really was in order to appear to have done him a bigger favour by introducing her to him, she had seemed to Swann not without beauty, certainly, but as having a kind of beauty that left him indifferent, that aroused no desire in him, even caused him sort of— _ ”

“How many commas does this guy use?” he whines, pushing against the arm restraining him, using the one he’s reaching out with to grab onto her forearm. She giggles as she continues, ignoring the rush of heat to her skin where he touches.

“ _ —physical repulsion, one of those women such as everyone has his own, different for each, who are the opposite of the type our senses crave. _ ” She releases a long exhale.

“Finally!”

“I warned you, you didn’t listen!” She turns back to him, now that he’s no longer trying to nab her book, but only—their faces are closer now than they were before.

Close enough, that once again Lexi finds herself realising just how beautiful he is. This time, stone cold sober.  _ Fuck _ .

Just as she remembered; freckled, smooth, warm, dimpled, smiling.

She wants to scream at herself each time her eyes drop down to his lips, she  _ knows _ he can see it, but it seems to be completely involuntary. 

_ Maybe I could just do it? Right? Friends kiss… I kissed Noah! Would there be any harm in just… going for it? _

Just as she’s fighting her thoughts, trying to see any sign of anything in Bobby’s eyes, she watches as they flick between her own.

And then, saved by the bell once again. Or, not saved? She isn’t sure. Her head is scrambled. Either way, she sits up straight and grabs her phone from the bedside table. She goes still when she sees who it’s from.

“Is everything okay?” Bobby asks.

She nods, eyes glued to the screen, no words coming. Because it’s Lucas. He’s contacting her for the first time since New Years, and not about work, either.

**Lucas:** Hey. I think we should talk.

She wants to send:

**Lexi:** it took you nearly two months to think about??

But instead, grateful for the opportunity and not great at being harsh, sends:

**Lexi:** okay. whenever you’re ready.

She bites her lip as she waits for ‘delivered’ to become ‘read.’

“Are you sure?” Bobby asks, pulling her back into the room. She’s like a statue and her face is bearing a sort of determined, yet surprised, focus.

“What?” She's pulled out of it a bit, confused.

“I asked if you’re sure that everything is ok?”

“Uh, yeah I just, should start getting ready for bed and stuff.”

“Oh. Okay.”

She isn’t looking at him, just staring at her phone. Brow furrowed like she cannot take her eyes off it, like her thoughts are halted by whatever she’s received. Bobby’s worried about her, but also a little pissed. She’s barely even registering him, and he knows what ‘I should start getting ready for bed’ means. It means she wants him to go. 

He shakes his head a little and lets out a concealed but frustrated breath. “We still on for Saturday? Since I’ve got that thing on Friday…” He’s meant to be seeing a friend’s band play at a pub. 

“Yeah, yeah sure.” She waves a hand a little dismissively and nods, and Bobby sighs. 

“Right,” he says, “I’m going then. See you Saturday.”

The words don’t register until Lexi hears the door shut behind him, and she feels a sudden sinking in her stomach. Her head bolts up at the spot he’d been in a moment ago, seeing only the empty space. She’d been so preoccupied with too many thoughts bashing around in her brain that she was barely paying attention to him. Which she now feels incredibly guilty about.  _ Eugh _ .

—-

The next day, Lexi agrees to meet Lucas at his apartment. The whole way there she’s shitting it and still not quite been able to control her thoughts. 

She knocks, afraid to finally see his face. When Lucas opens the door he looks a little worse for wear, his hair fluffy and his black shirt untucked from his trousers.

“Hey,” he says, his face a mix of emotions Lexi might place as relieved and apologetic.

“Hi.” She enters in response to his hand held out beckoning her to come in, and Lucas shuts the front door. 

“Uh, you want a drink, or anything?” he asks, leading them through into the kitchen.

She shakes her head. “No thanks. So…”

Nodding, Lucas starts. “I’m sorry I cut you off. That I’ve been ignoring you and the conversation we needed to have. I said I wouldn’t do that,” he sighs and runs a hand down his face, disappointed in himself. “I think I was just hurt and confused, and reverted back to what I was used to. You didn’t deserve that, especially not after I promised. I should’ve let you explain.”

She lets out a little exhale of breath, not expecting to so immediately feel put at ease by him. “Thanks for apologising.”

“What happened? You know, on New Years.”

She sighs. “Well, I’m still not really sure. He just went for it. I didn’t even realise it was him until I opened my eyes. It wasn’t like I—I mean, I didn’t even think about it.”

“So, it didn’t mean anything?”

She shakes her head, feeling a lump build up in her throat. “I wanted it to be you,” she whispers.

“You did?”

“Of course I did.” The pain in her voice is clear.

“Fuck.” He paces back and forth a few times. “If only I’d let you explain…”

She chews her lip, watching the way his face falls in frustration.

“Lexi, I really am sorry. You didn’t deserve me ignoring you, and I need to get better at communication.”

As always, the way Lucas looks and his voice sounds right now makes her melt. She wants to relieve his guilt, tell him it’s all okay. 

“It’s okay. I’m glad we’re talking now.”

“Yeah.” He nods. “So, I realised I guess I just needed to talk to you, because I couldn’t bear that we were at odds like that. And realising the whole thing wasn’t even… well. I never even discussed anything about us with you. And that’s on me. What I wanted, but never told you, was that I wanted you to myself. And it’s my own fault that I got mad about you seeing other guys when we never even defined anything.”

“Lucas, I-” for a moment she considers telling him that the Bobby thing isn’t real, but the thought doesn’t feel right in her head. False. Foreign. And she doesn’t want to make him feel worse than he already does. 

When it’s clear she doesn’t know what to say next, he continues. “So, I still like you, Lexi. A lot. And I want to see if… if we can try again? But this time maybe have those conversations, first.”

He’s standing there saying everything right, doing everything right, but... she doesn’t get the spark. She doesn’t feel… right. Doesn’t want to fall into his arms like she had the last time she’d properly seen him. And that’s concerning. Lexi isn’t sure how to feel about that fact, or what to do, and her thoughts are all over the place. Not to mention she’d barely thought about him in a while until he texted the other day. Or that she’d realised she’d never told him she liked him, concluded that she might not ever fall in love… but… 

“Lucas, hearing you say that… I’m—you really do mean something to me but—”

But then she does get the spark. Fiery and bright and a little uncomfortable like the sun at high noon. She’s seeing a freckled man with golden eyes pinning her up against her bedroom door, slipping his pinky between her fingers as he’s dancing with her to Fleetwood Mac. Holding her face and telling her she’ll find love, making the tiniest body contact while trying to wrench Proust from her hands, walking her home from work every single Friday.

The face of a man she’d ignored the last time she’d seen him. 

Oh god. She doesn’t like Lucas anymore. Maybe she hadn’t liked him for a while, but it’s all clear now.

Her thoughts are interrupted when Lucas leans forward, catching her lips with his. She’s surprised, and for a moment—a brief moment where she remembers all the times they’ve kissed before and the way her heart soared at him and how much she wanted this for so long—she lets it happen. Sort of forgets what is going on as he kisses her. But then she remembers, and pushes him back.

“Are you okay?” he asks, confusion evident in his furrowed brow and eyes flicking between her own. 

_ Fuck.  _ This is tough. This is never a situation Lexi expected to be in, and certainly isn’t one she has any kind of preparation for. But, she supposes, honesty will serve her best—there’s nothing else she can do. 

“I’m sorry, Lucas. I just don’t… feel that way anymore.”

Actually saying it out loud feels weird. After such a time, it’s sort of liberating for her, even if her heart aches for him. She can’t believe how the way she felt just sort of crept away from her and she never even noticed.

He stops a moment, frozen in time as he stares at her. That look could make her break down right now. It’s vulnerable. Then he swallows, nods, and releases a somewhat bitter laugh. “I can’t blame you. I missed my shot, right?”

Her eyes sting as she sees him so defeated and hurt, so un-Lucas.

“Lucas,” she whispers, “I’m so sorry.”

“Hey, don’t be. It’s my own fault. And truthfully, it’s probably better this way. I can’t give you what you need. What you deserve.” He shrugs half-heartedly, as though at a loss for the proper words, then runs a hand through his hair—ungelled like it had been the last time she was here. “If we went back to how things were… it would be exactly that. To be honest, I’m not sure we work. I don’t think liking someone is enough. You need someone who isn’t afraid to show you off, who can give you something more certain than I can. And I know he can do that.”

She tries so desperately to cling on to the tears gripping at her lash line. For so long, she had felt for this man, and now he’s finally opening himself up to her. It’s sort of fitting, really. Missing each other like trains at a busy platform. The fact that he’s only ready to be there for her when she discovers she isn’t anymore.

“I’ll tell you something, though,” he moves in closer, close enough that ordinarily Lexi would have been in a tizzy at his unwavering gaze and his breath on her skin, “if he breaks your heart, I’ll be there to pick up the pieces.”

Lexi wants to laugh at the irony—that it had been Bobby who’d picked up the pieces Lucas had shattered—but he looks so serious she knows he truly believes that. He really would do that if it came to it. And she can’t in good conscience point it out to him. So she just nods, before flinging her arms around his waist and burying her head in his chest. The familiar scent that used to drive her so crazy wafts up at her, and it only makes her want to cry more. He’s hesitant at first, then he wraps his arms around her too. 

It’s a good thing she can’t see the way that Lucas’ eyes well up also. The way he holds her tight because the whole thing is too sad. They were never right for each other. They always missed the mark somehow. Sometimes only by a millimetre. Maybe somewhere, in another life, they could’ve made it. But they both know they can’t in this one. There’s too much wrong between them.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispers with tears in her eyes as she hugs him, and she can feel as he hugs her back tighter. She hates herself for doing this to him. Because she does love him, in a way. He’s always going to matter to her. It’s odd, since they never had what any would call a meaningful relationship, but he feels very important to her all the same.

Lying to him hurts, too. Knowing he doesn’t know the truth about Bobby. But she can’t tell him. Doesn’t know how.

He wants to say something, to let her know it’s okay. But he knows if he speaks it will come out cracked. Maybe the fact he doesn’t want her to hear that only confirms it all. They just aren’t right for each other.

With a final tight squeeze, Lexi pulls away from him, empty space between her arms where she’d held him. She rushes out wordlessly, not looking back because she can’t see his face right now. It’ll get better with time, but it’s too raw. She can’t bear the thought of seeing how she hurt him. 

Each stair falls away beneath her as she trips over them, still surrounded by Lucas’ scent and the look on his face and the way he’d felt in her arms—holding on to something that was maybe never there.

But as she comes to the bottom of the stairs of the apartment block, Lexi almost forgets how to breathe. She stops where she is, reminded of something.

The spark. It came. 

She’d been blind to sexual tension a hundred times over, blind to the way she leaned on him for support, wanted him around, missed him when he was gone. Blind to the way her heart and her stomach reacted in the simplest of moments; baking cupcakes with him, drinking coffee with him, sitting on her bed chatting shit and eating shit and watching shit. She’s overwhelmed with thoughts about the way he touches her, and how that makes her feel. Those lips she couldn’t stop looking at, his eclectic eyes, his soft freckled brown skin, his hands holding hers. She’d wanted to kiss him. Twice now. She can’t push those feelings down any longer. 

She has feelings for someone, and it isn’t Lucas. 

The spark had come in thoughts of Bobby McKenzie.


	34. Where’s The Self Destruct Button?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexi confronts her feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to Sarah for ur help!💜
> 
> Chapter Playlist:  
> Heat Waves (Stripped Back) - Glass Animals  
> 1x1 (feat. Nova Twins) - Bring Me The Horizon  
> River - Bishop Briggs

The taxi ride home is silent on the outside, but inside her head Lexi is thinking a thousand trains of thought at once. How the hell is she going to navigate this? Does she just ignore it, act as she always does around him? Or does she tell him? What if that fucks everything up? She’d really meant it when she told Bobby he meant a lot to her. And she’s not sure how she would be if he wasn’t in her life anymore.

The way she wants him is coming over her like a wave. She wants him in the morning: when he’s sleepy and croaky and makes her breakfast; she wants him in the day when he’ll watch too many stupid films with her and take the piss out of Proust and draw on her hand; she wants him in the evening, when he’ll hold her and tell her he’s there for her and ask her about love and make her laugh as she drifts off to sleep. She wants their future: a first kiss and a sweet disposition and Bobby. Just Bobby.

She’s tearing up and certain that the taxi driver is worried about her—but it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter.

More than anything? Lexi is fucking terrified. She can already feel her walls building up around her. She’s never felt this way about someone. Never gone from such a strong friendship to feeling like this. But she wants him, she really does. Realising it is like breaking a dam and all the little touches and moments and words flood out. Everything she’d somehow repressed at the time; the way he looks at her, how he’s there for her, how he holds her, how they’d almost kissed. 

So it feels a little dreamlike when she gets home and Bobby is on her couch. Like he belongs there. There’s a fluff of white noise in her ears and her stomach feels like it’s full of bees.  _ Shit. I didn’t want to navigate this tonight. _

“Hey, Chelsea let me in. Where’ve you been?” he asks, noticing the drying tears on her cheeks.

“At Lucas’s.”

“Oh.” Bobby gets a funny feeling that was who she was ignoring him for the other day. He has no right to be, but he’s angry. And hurt. And worried about the fact that Lucas made her cry. “And?”

“And,” she shrugs nonchalantly as she walks over to her bedroom, letting Bobby follow, “he’s not mad anymore.”

“You um…” he clears his throat. “You kiss and make up?”

“Yeah. I guess you could say that.” Lexi has no idea why she’s not just telling Bobby exactly what happened. Is she embarrassed? Or… is it something else? Fear, perhaps. Too much emotion and confliction about liking him flooding her head and buzzing in her stomach.

“Fucking hell,” he scoffs, leaning against Lexi’s door. Because knowing she’d seen Lucas, that they might’ve rekindled things, stings a lot more than he ever expected. Lucas had just kept hurting her, intentional or not, and Bobby hated it. Hates it. He thought maybe… maybe when he’d nearly kissed her once, and again, that he saw something reciprocated in her eyes. The way her eyes had flicked down to his lips before they’d been interrupted. But maybe not. Maybe he hopes too much. Sure, her happiness is paramount to him, but after everything that transpired between the three of them the thought only makes him angry. And irrational. And stupid.

“What?”

“Really? You didn’t maybe think about telling me first?” he raises his voice and Lexi flinches in surprise. He hates that he’s letting himself get wound up, that he’s pulling her into this, but he can’t stop himself.

“Why are you so pissed? This was the whole goal all along, right? And you’ve known about this for months!” She’s trying to convince herself that she’s still the same person she was at the start of all this. She’s still after Lucas, and maybe if she makes Bobby believe it’s happened she can stop pining for him. Maybe it’s best that way. It’s all happened so fast tonight that everything is turned up on high, and she’s too scared to say anything vulnerable.

“Because you’ve made me look like an idiot. You’ve made it look like you’re cheating on me.” He knows it’s stupid the moment it slips out of his mouth, but he can’t help it. There’s a worm in his brain telling him to act ridiculous so that he can’t get hurt by the fact that she’s back with Lucas.

“Um. To who?”

“ _ Him _ ! He knows about us—right?” Bobby could kick himself for the way he says ‘about us’ like she actually likes him back.

“But Bobby, isn’t this exactly what we agreed to do? It’s not like you’ve not been sleeping with other people this whole time anyway!”

“Not since that night you called me.”

“What?” There’s a swell of relief in Lexi’s chest. A beat of surprise and she’s falling a moment. _Why are you killing me like this?_ _Stop making me think you care for me as I care for you._

“I just don’t understand why you’d go back to him, why you’d  _ sleep _ with him again after how he’s been treating you recently? I can see your fucking eyes, Lexi, I know you’ve been crying!”

“Why do you care so much?”

_ Because I like you. Shit. _

The look Bobby is giving her means Lexi can’t wait any longer. She has to tell him. Whatever she’d been trying to get out of letting him believe that is only causing her more angst, and even if Bobby’s expression means nothing—she still can’t do this to him. She sighs heavily and her own expression softens.

“We didn’t sleep together.”

“Huh?”

“We just talked. He kissed me but I stopped it.”

“Then why… why did you let me think that?”

“I—I don’t know…”  _ I’m so scared. _

He hangs his head and laughs dryly. “Old habits die hard I guess.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing.”

“Bobby?!” 

“You kissed him?” he asks, a weakness to his voice.

“For all of five seconds,” she replies with the tears stinging her eyes once more. Just moments ago she was trying to convince Bobby that things were going ahead with her and Lucas; but now for whatever reason she wanted him to know she didn’t kiss him. Maybe she’s deluding herself into thinking that Bobby’s anger is an opening. Maybe realising she has feelings for him is fucking her up more than she can tell.  _ Brain, please make up your mind _ .

Bobby struggles to conceal the way his eyebrows slant up in the middle, how his eyes widen and his lips thin.

“I should’ve never agreed to this.”

That cuts. A lot. It’s like a gust of wind throws her back across her room. 

“I asked you  _ so many times _ if you were okay with it! Fucking hell Bobby it was  _ your idea _ !” she raises her voice again.

“I think it’s the most stupid idea I’ve had in a while.”

Lexi sets her jaw, the reality of what Bobby is saying setting in. He never wanted to do this. Maybe he never even wanted anything to do with her. And after all of it—finally falling for him and trying to pull up the courage to tell him, struggling and lying a little when she saw him—she’s not sure how much more she can put herself through. Not if he regrets ever meeting her. So as she looks at him, her eyes glassy and trying to keep her face straight and her voice smooth, she agrees. “Yeah. That makes two of us.”

Bobby almost scoffs, would if his anger wasn’t so tinged by sadness. The way her eyes bore into him is like never before, and he can’t handle it. 

“Yeah. I don’t really fancy being around you right now. Please don’t call. Not that you would anyway. Well, unless you needed a mate after kissing  _ him _ again,” he says sternly, that look still clear as day on his face.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

But his face—although not entirely clear what it is saying—is definitely not kidding. It’s serious and scary and it hurts. Almost breaks her in two. He doesn’t need to respond.

Bobby turns from her, and she can feel the distance between them already. He opens Lexi’s bedroom door and stalks through the main room, taking another metaphorical punch at her with each step.

“What the fuck?! What the hell is going on?” Lexi shouts after him, a hint of desperation seeping through her intended anger.  _ I’m mad but please don’t leave. Please don’t leave me. I can’t be the reason you regret the past almost five months _ .

She’s getting enough grief from her own mind going haywire that whatever is happening with Bobby is making her head hurt. A lot. Is he seriously angry about what Lucas thinks? That he looks like a cuckold or something?

But Bobby knows exactly what he’s doing. He’s self destructing. He knows this is the end of the line for him and Lexi, and he wants the opportunity to ease the blow to his heart a little. She doesn’t need him anymore. She got the guy. And if he lets this end on his terms he thinks his heart might break a little too much. He needs to be the bad guy so that he only has himself to blame for the fact that she doesn’t see him how he sees her. 

“I’m leaving,” he says, swinging the door open and stalking down the corridor, leaving the door to slam behind him. It happens too fast. Lexi winces and those tears start to fall, staring at the door in front of her. Empty. Shut. He’s not coming back.

She isn’t sure when they stop, or at what point Chelsea cradles her in her arms and holds her all through the night. 

All she can think about is Bobby. And how she’d gone from admitting how she felt about him to being torn down by him because of her own stupid lies.

—-

Lexi wakes to gentle humming, soft fingers dancing over the back of her head. Her eyes are sore and her body aches. Even the light from the curtain falling over the bedroom just feels like a nuisance.

“Babe,” Chelsea whispers when she sees that Lexi’s eyes have fluttered open. The latter turns to face her best friend, who’s sitting up in bed in her dressing gown with a cup of tea in her spare hand. 

“Thank you,” Lexi says. It’s understood.

Chelsea doesn’t respond, which may seem unusual, but she knows Lexi needs a bit of time to come to her senses until she lets her know what’s going on.

Of course, Chelsea had heard the shouting. The flat isn't noise-proof. But between that and Lexi’s silent tears, stoic expression, and catatonic body all night, there is a lot to piece together.

Lexi eventually relays the whole tale to Chelsea, a few tears fall and her voice cracks, while the blonde holds her hand and nods enthusiastically at the right moments. She doesn’t rub it in that she was right about Lexi’s feelings for Bobby.

— 

The week goes by with radio silence on either end. She’s been working non-stop, and never would she have dreamed she’d feel more comfortable around Lucas than around Bobby. 

On Friday, Lexi knows Bobby has a prior engagement, but that doesn’t stop the pin which pierces her chest when she sees he isn’t there. 

Lexi's stomach has been in knots all night, and when she finally steps out to leave, the empty chair at the edge of the bar is the only thing she sees. A bright red elephant in the centre of her vision. 

For the first time since October, Bobby isn’t there to walk her home.

It’s empty, cold. Eerily silent. She used to like this part of her day. Now it feels achingly lacking.

It hurts again the next day when Bobby is a no show for their planned binge-watch of something on Netflix. She honestly hadn’t really expected him to be there, but it hurts worse than Friday. Because he was meant to be there. He doesn’t send a text, he doesn’t call, and Lexi spends the day wasting away instead, wishing he would. 

—-

Bobby spends his Friday evening pretending to be happy as he watches his friend perform. Feeling like he doesn’t deserve to feel happy when he might’ve hurt her. But all he can think about is where he would usually be. Who he would usually be with, and how he’s fucked himself over. How he doesn’t know how to apologise, if he even has a right to, after blowing up over the most ridiculous thing. The look on her face… he can’t get it out of his head. Was she hurt? Angry? Both? Or worse, indifferent. 

He’s embarrassed, still angry, and embarrassed that he’s angry, so he doesn’t reach out. Even though it kills him. 

—-

The next Wednesday, Bobby knows Lexi isn’t working. He knows for a fact because they’d planned something before. No chance of that happening now. 

So he’s sat at the bar, a few too many drinks in his system and looming regret. Lucas is wiping down a counter near him when Bobby’s alerted to his proximity. 

“Hi,” Lucas says awkwardly. God, he’d been so jealous of this man for so long and they’d barely said two words to one another. 

Bobby looks up from his drink, his expression flat and unreadable. All he can think is  _ that makes two of us _ and the fact that he’d never meant anything to Lexi. And he’s angry. Oh god, he’s angry. The alcohol isn’t helping. 

“I’m- sorry about everything, you know,” Lucas continues. “I really hope you two are happy together, I mean it.”

Bobby scoffs, unable to stop the venomous tirade which erupts from him. “Mate, she was only doing it to make you jealous. I don’t mean shit to her. You should be happy.” He’s not this guy, and he hates that he’s letting things get to him and stooping so low. 

He’s clearly upset. Bobby’s practically giving Lexi to Lucas, but it doesn’t feel right. 

“What?” Lucas is seething.

“Yup,” he slurs, “I was but a pawn in her game to win your affections. You’re the knight, the big prize winner.”

“No, seriously—what?” Lucas grips the rag in his hand tight.

“We. Were. Never. Together,” Bobby spells out tauntingly. “She used me to make you jealous.”

Lucas looks absolutely furious, his jaw set and his eyes on fire. He swallows a thought down, considering Bobby, and then looks like he’s about to walk away from the conversation, but Bobby continues:

“So what? You wanna fight me? I deserve it.”

“I’m not going to fight you.”

“Aw, man. Punch me,” he pushes, a sort of manic anger emanating from him.

“I’m not going to fucking fight you. I’m going to cut you off. Go home, Bobby.”

“I have a very punchable face.”

“Yep,” Lucas laughs dryly, “you sure do.”

“Ah hell, you gonna say that and expect me to not wanna fight you?”

“You said it first. Go. Home.”

“You love that phrase, don’t you? Told Lexi to go home the minute she tried to stand up to you, huh?”

“This is none of your business, Bobby. You said so yourself, you don’t mean shit to her.” Lucas hadn’t meant to sink to the drunk man’s level, and is ashamed that he had. Low hanging fruit.

“Meet me outside,” Bobby spits, downing his whisky and slamming it on the bar before storming out of the place.

Lucas sighs. He knows he has to go out there, at least to get Bobby to leave.

Instead of a man gearing up for a fight Lucas finds Bobby with his head in his hands on the curb. Great.

Lucas calls a cab company and Bobby doesn’t even look up as he speaks. He’s able to get into the cab by himself and make his way home. 

When he gets there, he falls into his bed, not bothering to switch any of the lights on.

Just the light of his phone, and his thumb hovering over the call button on Lexi’s contact.

After some drunk deliberation, he presses call and waits at the edge of his bed, letting his phone ring out. 

She won’t answer.

She will.

No, she won’t.

He almost jumps out of his skin when the call starts counting the seconds. 

She’s answered.


	35. Ending The Agreement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone deals with the information that has come to light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big thanks to Sarah for looking over it and always letting me ramble to u🤌
> 
> Chapter Playlist:  
> ilomilo - Billie Eilish  
> Love Is A Bitch - Two Feet  
> Go Fuck Yourself - Two Feet

Lexi is almost asleep when her phone rings. The sound jolts her to jump straight up and grab her phone. She doesn’t even think twice about answering when she sees it’s Bobby—his name lit up on the screen like a beacon of hope. She’s angry at him, but if this is him calling to sort things out—that’s all she wants.

“Hey,” he whispers from the other end of the line. He sounds a little odd; a fraction fuzzy and maybe confused. Softer than usual.

“Hey,” her own voice rings out across the quiet of the dark of her bedroom. The solitary sound asserts to her just how lonely she feels right now. 

“You’re up.” Statement.

“Why did you call?”

“I’m drunk. I wanted to… hear your voice, I guess. Taking the piss out of me.”

She laughs weakly. Despite their argument she feels sort of… safe. His words are comforting and reminiscent of things before it all went wrong. “The piss taking comes tomorrow. Tonight? With drunk Bobby? No way. Is everything okay?”

“No. I don’t know. I miss you.” He lets out a really loud exhale, his voice still quiet like he’s trying to make sure no one hears him, despite the fact that he’s laying alone in bed. “I really fucking miss you.”

The slight brokenness of his tone and the thought that he actually misses her leaves Lexi a little breathless.

“Bobby-”

“I know. I’m pissed and upset, we're in a fight. I know. But for now, can we just pretend we’re not?”

“Okay.”

She’s relieved. She’s not sure she has the energy to be angry at him when he sounds like this. When he’s told her he misses her.  _ Really fucking misses her. _ His voice is somewhat small and melancholic, the voice she’s wanted to hear for a while now. She misses him too. It’s insane how just a few days can feel like forever knowing that someone who’s always there isn’t anymore. Is angry and distant. She misses just being normal with him. Just sitting in her bed doing basically nothing except bask in each other’s company. She misses his loud laugh and his teasing smirk and the dimples that it brings out. 

Her heart aches at the fantasy of pretending they aren’t in the situation they’re in. Knowing she's hurt him, somehow. That, right now, Bobby and Lexi aren’t two people on a phone call laughing or making jokes or speaking playfully like they always would—they are just two people with a lot of things between them. Too much space, too many words left unsaid, things not done, mistakes made, lies told. Hearts hurt.

There’s a small crackle from the other end.

“You can get mad at me for this tomorrow but… I fought with Lucas.”

“Bobby, you-” she starts to raise her voice, but he’s right, she’ll save it for tomorrow. The promise of tomorrow sounds good. “Why?”

“Mad at him.”

“For?”

Bobby sighs. “Tomorrow. I just wanted to give you a heads up.”

“Alright.” It’s not alright, but she can’t say anything else. And the word ‘fought’ could really mean a lot of different things. It could mean they argued, or even had a fist fight. She can’t really imagine it, but the prospect of them really  _ fighting _ is scary and upsetting. She isn’t even entirely sure what they’d fight about, and the slightest suggestion that it could have something to do with her is even worse. Wishing she could ask him to elaborate but aware he doesn’t want to discuss it, Lexi keeps her mouth shut.

For a minute they just stay on the line, listening to the other breathe. Oddly, it’s not even the slightest bit awkward.

“Would you… read to me?” he asks quietly, breaking the silence. She imagines he’s remembering the time before things went sour, just before she’d gotten the text from Lucas.

Her eyes shut at the sound of his voice. She can’t deny him. No matter how frustrated she is at him for fighting with Lucas, or for fighting with her, she still wants to make sure he’s okay. Would do anything to make sure he’s okay. Because against her better judgement, she cares about him,  _ likes _ him. So as both hands press the phone tight to her ear, she knows she’ll fulfill his request.

The tick in her heart and the prickling of her eyes are not those of a woman ready to let this go.

She stands and moves to her bookcase, scanning her eyes over the contents. She wants to read something she knows well, that is a comfort to her, and hopefully to him. 

“Are you still there?” he says after a moment, a little worry apparent in his voice. It tugs at her chest.  _ Why did we have to fight? _

She doesn’t respond, instead just begins to read:  _ “Emma Woodhouse, handsome, clever and rich, with a comfortable home and happy disposition...”  _

She reads a while, until she can hear light snores on the other end of the line. Quietly hanging up, Lexi settles down into bed, unable to sleep for constant thoughts about it all. She keeps turning over, readjusting herself and the material around her, comfort seeming impossible. The pillow is lumpy and the duvet scratchy as her mind races. Imagining Bobby and Lucas and whatever they’d fought about, whether it was violent or just loud. Imagining what on earth he’s really angry at her about, how frustrated she is that they haven’t just talked it through. What could she have done to upset him so much? Really, did she mean that little to him? Does she still? Has she ever mattered? She doesn’t expect him to feel the way she does, but anything would’ve been a comfort. And imagining Bobby, on his bed, speaking softly into his phone, afraid she might hang up on him. Wondering what on earth is going through his head. He said he missed her. First person present tense direct statement.  _ I miss you.  _

The worst part is the fear that she may never find out.

—-

When tomorrow arrives, the promises aren’t kept. Both Bobby and Lexi spend their days checking their phones, but afraid to reach out first. 

Lexi isn’t sure how they’ve left things. They fought, then Bobby called her, drunk, saying he missed her. So, their predicament seems wobbly. She wants to call him, know what’s going on, why he got so angry. But, she doesn’t want to overstep.

_ Fuck. _ She likes him too much to not see him again soon, and the thought of him being mad at her kills her. The idea that she’s just by herself having feelings for him and he just finds their whole arrangement a nuisance stings like she could never imagine. If only liking him had been a choice, then she could’ve forced herself into believing this was for the best. But it wasn’t, and she can’t. All she can believe seems to be the worst—that maybe Bobby will never tell her. That perhaps he needed an easy out, and that she can’t bear to know if that’s really the case. Sure, he’d called and said he missed her, but—maybe just as someone to be there? Probably not in the way she can’t stop missing him. 

When it gets late the next day and Lexi needs to go to work, her thoughts are too preoccupied by Bobby to think much on anything else. It’s like the universe has it out for her. She finally breaks things off with Lucas, they clear the air, everything’s good between them. She realises, perhaps most importantly, that she’s falling for Bobby, only to be pushed away straight after. Only to lose him before she even had him. 

She enters the staff room to see Lucas already in there, hands on hips with his back to her. The door squeaks when she opens it, and as he turns to her, his face is so steely she almost jumps.  _ Oh. Oh no. _

Images of Bobby and Lucas scrapping around once more fill her mind, and she’s terrified to hear what comes out of his mouth. 

It actually turns out to be worse than that.

“I know you lied to me, Lexi. You were never with him,” he says sternly, jaw clenched and eyebrows furrowed with anger and a tint of sadness.

“What?” she says, taken aback.

“Bobby told me about your arrangement.”

“Oh.”  _ Oh shit. _ That’s what their fight had been about.  _ Fuck.  _ She really screwed this one up. Like, messed up in a way she can never take it back. She wishes she’d said something when she had the chance, when things ended well between them. They’d been  _ good.  _ They’d hugged and cried and ended on such good terms. The hurt was bearable—it wasn’t disgust or anger. Fuck. Hindsight is a bitch.

A frantic feeling creeps up from her toes to her head, begging her to say more than just one, frankly quite dismissive, word. She tries to scramble words to say, ways to apologise, but her thoughts aren’t straight and she stumbles out a couple of incoherent sounds.

“It might’ve been fun and games for you, but it killed me. I told you that first night that I was working on my jealousy and yet you used that fact to try and manipulate me?”

God, she did exactly that. Hearing him say it hurt more than she knew it could. She may not have feelings for him anymore, but hurting him? She still cares deeply, and knowing she’s hurt him hurts  _ her. _

“I’m sorry, Lucas. I don’t know what to say; I didn’t think of it like that, I—” but she knows excuses are useless. Echoing fruitlessly in the silent air which lies between them. The space unobstructable. No one wants to hear excuses when the rug’s been pulled right out from under them. If she knows anything about Lucas, it’s that he particularly hates to be blindsided. She scuffles around in her head, every thought lapping over each other. The ideas of what to say swiftly covered by thoughts of Bobby being mad at her, of missing Bobby, then back to Lucas and how on earth she could ever apologise. Then realising she’s been quiet for too long and Lucas is still just standing there, hands on his hips, face like a nightmare she never wanted to have. 

“I don’t have anything else to say to you right now. Maybe one day, I’ll see past this, but right now? I don’t think I can. Not after everything.” He sighs and starts to move but she jumps in front of him, hands up like a surrender.

“I know. I really fucked up, Lucas. I really, really fucked up and I’m so sorry!” She feels tears begin to sting at her face again. She had been crying too much lately. She wishes she’d stop. But then, life hadn’t been giving her much of a breather.

“Save it,” he grunts before pushing past her and out into the bar. She doesn’t even turn to watch his retreating figure. The guilt is too much.

_ Et tu, Lucas? _

The worst part is—he’s right. She did do that. Used his one insecurity he’d told her about in confidence against him. It feels so silly now. More than silly—cruel. Just because she’d liked him, that was really the way she thought she could gain his affections? 

So now she’s on the outs with the guy she likes, and the guy she still cares deeply about. In only a matter of days. Guilt seeps through her pores and builds a wrenching feeling in her stomach, turning until she feels a little queasy. She never had been good at dealing with knowing she’d upset someone. Especially not someone that she’d shared such a convoluted and odd past with. 

There is something making her more angry than guilty, though. This could’ve been avoided if Bobby hadn’t retaliated. If he wasn’t mad at her—if he’d told her what was happening and they’d talked it out. Then maybe she could’ve let Lucas know gentler, and maybe she wouldn’t be in rags right now.

—-

Lexi is barely thinking as she finds herself climbing Bobby’s flat block stairs two-by-two after work. She’s just angry—that’s all that’s really running through her mind. It doesn’t matter how she feels about him, she’s hurt that he’s been avoiding her while telling Lucas everything, and pissed. It’s been two weeks since she’s seen his face and it terrifies her to see it again, but she has to. She just wants to know what happened and how to fix this.

She knocks a few times, and when there isn’t an immediate answer, she knocks again, banging hard and angrily on his front door.

He opens it, and his eyes widen for a moment when he sees her. 

“What are you—”

“I can’t believe you told him!”

Her words immediately register, and he walks back into his flat and shrugs. “Oops.” His voice now is so unlike him, Lexi flinches. Dripping with sarcasm, cold and harsh. So distant and a world a way from how he’d ever been before, from how he’d been on the phone the other night. But she’s not letting him stop her from saying what she has to. 

“I know you’re pissed at me, but we still had an agreement!” She follows him through the hall after kicking back at his door to shut it. She isn’t leaving until she’s got answers. When she catches him at the end of the corridor, she pulls his arm so that he’s back to face her.

Bobby almost melts at the touch. The fact that he’s hurt and angry just makes it all the more affecting to feel her hand on his arm. It can’t stay there. Seeing her again after what felt like so long (even if it wasn’t actually), is far more surreal than Bobby had expected and every single emotion is heightened. Including the stupid ones.

“What agreement, Lexi? You’re done with me, right? It’s over?” He throws his hands up in frustration, shrugging her off. 

She feels her face steel, hurt and frustration. “If it’s all over anyway, what good was there in telling him?”

“Well, I’m pissed at you, for one,” he spits. “He deserved to know.”

“And I want to know what I did to make you so mad!”

“You lied to me, like it was the easiest thing in the world,” he yells and shakes his head, features scrunched up in a way that makes her stomach crunch. Anger and disappointment and pain and betrayal.

“I told you straight after! Is that why the fuck you just left the other day? Why you didn't want to talk to me?”

“I didn’t want to talk to you because I didn’t know what was going on! You were with him, you  _ kissed _ him, then you let me believe something else happened,” he shouts, hands out to the side as he gets closer to her.

“Why the fuck do you care so much?!” There’s more emotion in her voice now, thick and loud and angry. “If I’m just a girl you agreed to help out one day in a bar, if you really do regret it all.” She’s looking at him with those wide eyes, a question in them, but also frantic frustration. He really could have all he needs to live on in those eyes alone. The way they make him feel like he’s falling but also so solid, so  _ seen.  _ But right now they’re also igniting this irritation and sear of emotion pooling in him. 

“You want to know why? You really wanna fucking know?”

“Yeah! Because right now you’re not acting like a friend, you’re not even—”

In a swift but rough movement, Bobby pulls Lexi’s face to his. Holy shit. The feeling that washes through Lexi as his lips make contact with hers is indescribable. Far away but so close. Happy but frustrated. Easy but difficult. Despite her surprise, Lexi almost instantly moves her lips against his. Mouths open, tongues tangling. It’s rough, frustrated, desperate. Like they want to fight but they don’t really, so kissing will do instead. Like they kind of want to hurt each other, but that’s also the last thing they want. 

Bobby pulls away suddenly, fear and shock apparent in his eyes. Like he doesn’t know if he made the right call. His eyes search hers, looking for a reaction, a little apologetic. But Lexi moves toward him again, and kisses him back. Harder. 

She clutches her hand tight to the back of his neck, squeezing a little as her other hand grips at his bicep. Bobby melts naturally into her reaction, her kissing him back, letting his arms grasp her waist tight. Holding her in the way he’d craved to hold her for a while now. Hands on her and bodies pressed tight together and faces crashing against each other. Kissing her until he’s breathless and his face hurts.  _ Kissing her.  _ Letting himself drown in the sweet taste of her lips and the softness of her skin.

This had been the last thing Lexi might’ve expected to come out of confronting Bobby, but she’s utterly lost. This kiss… it feels like  _ it.  _ With this kiss, she knows. Suddenly Lexi understands exactly what Bobby had meant when he’d said:  _ Lexi, my darling, kissing means everything _ . It’s a feeling she never even knew existed. Like it’s just right, exactly where she should be. The only way she can properly find the words to describe it is  _ everything.  _ All-encompassing, overwhelming, both satiating yet hunger-inducing.

But it’s passionate, too. Angry and rough and so many months worth of growing and swelling feelings all pouring out into one moment. 

She pulls his bottom lip between her teeth and adds some slight pressure before releasing it with an onomatopoeic ‘pop’; this is an angry kiss, after all. He chuckles a low almost-growl into her mouth, taking the lead to pull her to him even tighter. She gasps, and pulls away slightly, letting her forehead fall to his.

“Can we take a quick reprieve from being angry for me to ask you a question?” she asks breathlessly, needing a moment to catch her breath and maybe get her head on straight a moment. They’d really just been kissing. It’s crazy but her head is trying to find anything to hold on to.

He nods.

“Are you wearing my cocoa butter Vaseline?”

He laughs despite himself, hands still making an imprint on her waist. “Yes. I’m still pissed though.”

“Yeah, I’m pissed too.”

But they both know neither of them are  _ really _ pissed as their eyes bore into each other. That’s code for:  _ let’s carry on.  _ And then their lips are on each other again, rough and wanting, and Bobby is lifting Lexi’s legs up to wrap around him and she gasps again. Her skirt rides up her thighs, and Bobby’s hands roam over her bare skin. The sensation of his hands on her body is insane. It burns but it soothes; stings but calms. Letting herself curl around him, Bobby presses her back against the wall. Their lips and tongues continue to tangle, unable to get enough of each other. When Bobby opens her mouth with his, squishing their noses together, and runs his tongue along her bottom lip, she lets out an accidental moan. He chuckles once more, roughly slipping his tongue back into her mouth and kissing her with vigour and passion. Letting his hands hold her thighs up against him, pressing his body tight to hers.

She’s getting what she wanted. Kissing him how she’d wanted to before. And shit, it passes her expectations in droves.

But one thing dampens the intense feelings pulsing through Lexi, and that’s that she knows this can’t last.


End file.
